The Cheaters
by Tweedledeedum
Summary: A Dair Story. Post Season 6. Now both trapped in loveless marriages, Dan and Blair realize their "real" connection is still there. Some Serena/Nate and Jenny/Nate. Rated M for language and ADULT situations. I do not own these characters.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

"Humphrey! Or should I say Gossip Girl?! What are we doing? Where are we going?" Blair huffed with annoyance as she crossed her arms and stared out the window, desperately trying to gather clues from the route they were following. The town car Dan had procured for their trip rapidly approached the Tappan Zee bridge, the Hudson River flowing beneath.

Dan affectionately rolled his eyes. It had been six long years since he revealed himself as the mystery blogger who had haunted the Upper East Side. He still regretted coming forward, because for those past six years he had to endure joke after endless joke about the irony of a guy being "Gossip Girl." People still laughed about it.

The only thing he didn't regret was Blair Waldorf's new found respect for him. She was initially pissed at him. But eventually she found it intriguing. The years passed and they would discuss it briefly here and there. Those discussions eventually evolved into more. It had reconnected them in a way Dan could never have imagined.

One night Dan and Blair found themselves alone at a party. Chuck had been out of the country-as usual-and Dan had sent Serena home early after she had too much to drink.

Again.

The pair found themselves outside on the balcony of a Manhattan penthouse, sipping wine and reminiscing about the time they went to investigate Juliet.

"So let me see if I have this correct," Blair began, trying her best not to slur her words. She wasn't full blown drunk, but she was definitely tipsy and she was starting to let her guard down. "You pretended to ask yourself about Juliet's whereabouts while sitting on my bedroom floor, and pretended to be surprised when you sent an email back to..yourself?" The wine had officially gone to Blair's head now, and reconciling how Dan could have possibly published so many tips all while looking surprised when receiving blasts with the rest of the gang on so many occasions had officially tipped the scale.

"You were just downright diabolical, Humphrey." Blair licked her lips as she slowly ran her index finger along the inside of his lapel. She was suddenly seeing him differently than she ever had before, even when they were dating. That's when Dan knew that marrying Serena had been an epic mistake. Well, he had always known. But now he was determined to do something about it. He had tried to win Blair back on many occasions before ultimately settling and reuniting with Serena. And here and now, Blair Waldorf was standing before him, shimmering in a red gown, reminiscent of the one she was wearing when he kissed her on Valentine's day many years before. It was always the gown he envisioned her wearing when he dreamed about her at night. The only thing stopping him from kissing her again was that they were at a party, surrounded by the people whose approval he had worked so relentlessly for. People still talked. That would never change. And those same people were probably already sending word back to Chuck of how flirtatious Blair was being with him.

And so the next few weeks following the party Dan and Blair secretly met for coffee and staged run ins throughout parts of Manhattan and Brooklyn. They texted each other regularly. Some texts were deep and serious in tone. Others were silly and fleeting, random thoughts that popped into their heads.

Dorota was the first to notice a change in Blair's demeanor, noting she'd only seen her this happy on one other occasion. And it definitely wasn't her wedding to Chuck. "When you and Lonely Boy were couple..."But Blair immediately shut her down. "If you don't mind your own business, Vanya will find out about your secret crush on the new mailman." Dorota scowled as she muttered something in Polish.

Dan had married Serena van der Woodsen only a year ago-the final nail in the coffin of a carefully constructed plan. The lonely boy from Brooklyn had finally gained entree into Manhattan's elite society. But it meant nothing, really. There hadn't been any significant changes in how he led his life, other than the Upper East Side apartment he had bought himself. And though Serena had been responsible for his initial infatuation with the posh zip code, it was indeed Blair Waldorf who had been responsible for maintaining it.

But Blair was taken.

Chuck Bass had somehow convinced her to wait for him, dangling his love like a carrot before her, and they finally married...in the most unromantic way possible. He had convinced Blair that he had changed. He had convinced her that all of his issues would be magically resolved if he could somehow manage to defeat his evil father. But it didn't quite work out that way.

Chuck had made her an accomplice in the death of his father, and they married in order to keep from testifying against one another. Just what every girl dreams of. Dan still couldn't fathom how they got away with it completely, but he honestly tried not to think about. For Blair's sake.

And now he and Blair were here together on a romantic getaway, leaving the rest of the world behind them. The timing was right. Chuck had taken Henry to Dubai, and Serena was in Montecito with Lily. Nothing was in their way now.

"Where are we going?" Dan repeated Blair's question back to her. "Well now, it's a surprise." He then leaned over, his lips a whisper away from Blair's neck. "So just sit back and relax. I know that's difficult for you." Blair turned her head away from the window, her doe eyes locking in on Dan's. He was so close she could feel his breath on her and it sent a tingling sensation down her spine.

"Do you think what we're doing is wrong?"Blair bit her lip. They hadn't even done anything really. But she wanted to know where Dan stood. He smiled, grabbing a hold of Blair's hand in an attempt to comfort her. The truth was, Chuck had been cheating on Blair off and on for a while. He still had a thing for nannies, it would seem. And though there was no concrete evidence that Serena had ever cheated on Dan, Serena never seemed to leave her flirtatious ways behind her. And although he had married her, it still occasionally angered him that she had strung him along all those years ago, throwing every man she ever dated in his face in some form or fashion and giving little regard to Dan's feelings.

He heaved a sigh. "I can't answer that, Blair. All I know is that.." But she suddenly interrupted him, placing her delicate fingers over his mouth. He in turn lightly kissed her fingertips, and slowly brought them around to caress his face. That answered her question.

Blair couldn't stop herself as she leaned in to kiss him, stretching her arms out completely to engulf his neck. She pulled at his hair and forced him in closer to her. His mouth opened to deepen the kiss as he now caressed her face. Blair pulled back slowly as Dan watched her with hooded eyes.

"Dan. I need you."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

They had been making out for twenty minutes when the town car was pulled into a quaint little bed in breakfast on the Hudson River. Blair pulled away from Dan, marveling at the sight of the white Victorian house with a matching white picket fence in front. It wasn't exactly her idea of luxury, but it was cute and low-key, which was precisely what they were going for. As the town car pulled to a stop, Dan tried to get a read on her. She tried to hold back a smile, but it crept upon her face anyway.

"Humphrey.." She said his name in a sing songy voice as she continued to survey the place through the window. "You're staring." She loved it.

"Waldorf.." He said, mimicking her voice as he leaned back in the seat. Technically it was Bass now, but he preferred not to acknowledge the fact that she was indeed married to Chuck Bass. "Well? What do you think?"

"It's very..common looking. Dare I say folksy? At least we won't have to worry about anyone _I _know running into us here." The driver came around to open the door and Blair grabbed her purse, preparing herself to exit the vehicle.

Dan had missed Blair's putdowns. He appreciated that she could open up to him, but he was always happy to see that the tiger could still bite. During their previous time together, Dan had come to find the elitist side of Blair rather amusing. Hell, he found her so entertaining he wrote a book about her. She never had any trouble criticizing the places he took her to while they were dating. Besides, she knew that he knew it was all for show anyhow, just in case someone accused her of losing her Upper East Side sensibilities. Dan had shown her what it meant to truly be a Brooklynite, taking her to all of the local dives. She came to enjoy Japanese whiskey and trips to Kellogg's. And Blair often teased him that everyone should try "slumming it" at least once in their lives.

And by "slumming" she meant fucking Dan senseless in an abandoned Brooklyn alley way. His hot hands all over her with her back pressed up against a cold brick wall... was something she had never ever forgotten. That night was about being reckless and experiencing things no one would expect her to. It was their dirty little secret. It was liberating and exhilarating, but it had never been just about sex for Dan and Blair. If it had been, their first time would have killed the relationship immediately.

When Blair was younger, Chuck had been responsible for her sexual awakening. He taught her most everything she knew, and she was an eager and willing participant. Nate had shut her down so frequently, she was beginning to think she had some form of cooties. Chuck preyed upon her insecurities. He used her issues with Nate to get closer to her, and she ultimately relinquished her virginity to him. He was what she needed at the time, or so she thought. She couldn't get enough of him, nor he her.

Their marriage started out very much the same. They needed each other. But that need was toxic. It had never been pure and simple with them. And it had definitely never been easy.

The thrill of finally marrying Chuck after everything they had been through was enough to propel them for a while. The passion between them reignited when Bart Bass came back from the dead. And Chuck Bass versus his father was a challenge she couldn't walk away from. He needed her and she relished it. It all seemed right. Helping him literally overthrow his father was the propeller Chuck needed to finally ask Blair to marry him. It was all she ever wanted. Or so she thought.

Lately Blair had struggled with the way it had all gone down. She watched a man fall to his death. It was something she thought about a lot. Chuck's demons continued to haunt them as he struggled with his father's ghost, and as he continued to try and separate Bart's name from Bass Industries and replace it with his own. Blair once again found Chuck pulling away from her. The cracks were already appearing by the time of Serena and Dan's wedding, though Blair was exceptional at hiding them. By that point she was growing tired of Chuck cutting her off emotionally, and when she voiced this to him he separated himself even further, this time physically.

Lipstick on the collar. Another woman's perfume. The signs had been there for years. It didn't take her long to figure out that his latest conquest was Henry's nanny, Corrinne. To make things worse, Henry talked about Corrinne incessantly. Her son and her husband both seemed to prefer the nanny.

In turn, Blair threw herself completely into her work. She had never confided her relationship problems to anyone, not even Serena. Blair had hosted her wedding, but truthfully they weren't even that close. Only when she rekindled her friendship with Dan did she realize she wasn't in it alone anymore. Over coffee one day, Dan admitted that things weren't that glorious with Serena either.

In their previous incarnation as friends, things between Dan and Blair had been different. Their talks were essentially one-sided with Dan giving and Blair taking. During their conversations, late nights spent at the Humphrey loft, she had confided in Dan the shame she felt being traded for a hotel and being treated like a possession. She wanted to be herself, not someone who just stood by her man like a trophy.

When their friendship finally turned romantic, Dan made it clear that they could be themselves. At least Dan thought he made it clear. They had many common interests, and she challenged him intellectually. It was the most natural relationship he had ever been in. He thought she felt the same. But sometimes the things that seem clearest are the most complicated. He still couldn't understand why she went running back to Chuck.

After he first revealed he was Gossip Girl, Dan set out to do some self-exploration. He and Serena had dated for a few months, but it was a rebound. He was still hurt from his breakup with Blair, and a relationship with Serena seemed the next best option. But it never felt right. They broke up a few months later and Dan set off on a trip around the world. First to London, Hungary, and Sweden. Then off to Thailand and Japan. After circling the globe multiple times, Dan ended up on Bondi beach in Australia. After a month of looking out over the ocean, he still couldn't get Blair out of his head.

It was here that Serena tracked him down. It took him by complete surprise to find her standing over him as he relaxed in the sand. And when she proposed, Dan accepted, figuring it could be the key to getting Blair out of his system for good. Plus it was time to return to the city anyway and perhaps time to just grow up. And wasn't that what marriage was all about?

The truth was he did love Serena. It was a love that grew from knowing someone for years and years. It was friendly and comfortable. But not stimulating. If there was anything he had learned in his time with Serena, it was that there definitely was a limit to how much Vespa riding and pool playing one could endure. It didn't take long before Dan actually found himself mentally comparing Blair and Serena. Try as he might, he could never break free of Blair, no matter what he told Serena. Serena was smiley and sunny, flirty and fancy free. Still unable to hold down a job. Blair on the other hand was feisty and opinionated, organized but complicated. Every word she said held his interest, even if he disagreed with her. This wasn't the case with Serena, and how he even ended up with her was as confusing as how Blair came to end up with Chuck.

And during one of their recent coffee meet ups, Blair actually caught Dan off guard. She apologized to him for not ending things properly with him before running back to Chuck. She blamed it on her immaturity, and simply being "screwed up." Dan knew it took an extreme amount of courage on Blair's part to admit she had been wrong. And he knew they could probably continue that discussion for years, but Dan also knew he probably would never get any answers that made sense as to why she did it. He then again apologized for the sex tape, but Blair decided to take some of the blame for that as well. "You were hurt. You thought I had gone back to Chuck." At that point, they vowed to move forward and not speak of the infamous sex tape again. Or their previous breakup.

And now here they were, trying it again, albeit in the most depraved way possible.

"So..." Blair did a three-sixty of the grounds, taking in the scenery, specifically the views of the river. "How did you find this place?"

"I've spent some time here in the past," Dan explained. "It's peaceful. I can write here, and no one bothers me. The people are nice..." Blair gave him a concerned look.

"So they _know_ you here?! Humphrey! We can't stay here if they know you. We need to leave immediately. Come on. Back in the car!" Dan approached her calmly as she started to grab for the door handle.

"Relax, Waldorf. I always use an alias when I stay here. Plus I pay cash, which they prefer anyway. Sometimes it's liberating to just..be someone else."

Blair gave him a disapproving look. "Well paying cash sounds very classy. They're probably just being nice to you because they think you're a drug dealer and they're scared the cops will be busting in on them at any possible moment."

They suddenly both looked up as the driver approached them, having returned from the house after dropping their bags off inside. He gave Dan a quick nod before popping back in the car. Dan pulled Blair back away from the door before it quickly sped away.

"Well I guess we're stuck here now." Blair shivered and heaved a sigh, looking up to see Dan grinning at her. It was approaching dusk and getting colder by the minute.

"So you use an alias, what like...'Gossip Girl?'" Blair smirked.

Dan frowned. Why had he ever admitted that to anyone?

"No. Not like 'Gossip Girl.' You're never going to let me live that down, are you?" Blair shrugged.

"So, if they don't know you as Dan Humphrey here...who do they know you as?" Dan grinned.

"Cedric Donohue," Dan said, without hesitation. Blair let out a cackle. She was soon laughing so hard her eyes were watering.

"Cedric Donohue?" Blair repeated. "Cedric? Like your Cabbage Patch kid?" She placed her hand on Dan's shoulder as if trying to steady herself, and Dan was happy to see her loosen up a bit, though he was extremely eager to revisit the tender moment they had shared in the town car.

"What? It's a perfectly distinguished sounding name. I don't know why it's so funny to you. I thought about Dylan Hunter but didn't want to take a chance that someone might make the connection." Blair shook her head as she recovered from her laughing fit. "You're a writer? And you can't come up with a decent alias?" Dan frowned.

"Cedric Donohue is hardly what I would call distinguished, Humphrey. But I can work with it. So who shall I be then?" Dan smiled. "I was thinking about that. How about Audrey Remington? Audrey as a tribute to your favorite actress."

"And Remington?" Blair looked at him, confused.

"I just think Remington sounds like a cool name," Dan smiled.

Blair rolled her eyes. "Fine. I can agree on that. So what exactly is our relationship?"

And there it was. The question which had multiple answers. There was Audrey and Cedric. And then there was Dan and Blair. Dan scratched his head.

"I don't think we have to define that just yet."

Before Blair could say another word, he grabbed her hand and led her up the walkway.

Dan held the door open as Blair walked inside, looking around the lobby. As Dan went to check them in, she ventured over to the enormous fireplace. While waiting at the front desk, he turned to take in the vision of Blair warming her hands by the fire. She was checking out the decor, giving it the Blair Waldorf once over. Her facial expression said it all.

"Welcome back, Mr. Donohue. It's been a while." A short, plump lady with fire engine red hair suddenly appeared and greeted him at the front desk.

"Thanks, Margie." Margie then reached under the desk and pulled out a key, expeditiously handing it to Dan.

"We have you in the Rose suite overlooking the river. I just need your signature here. Will you be dining with us this evening?" Dan took a quick glimpse over towards Blair and scrunched his brow, thinking for a moment.

"Um, actually...would it be possible to have dinner in my room tonight for me and my guest? We're a little tired from our trip over." Dan gave Margie a charming smile which she reciprocated.

"I think that can be arranged, Mr. Donohue. Just so you know, roast duck is on the menu tonight." She snuck a peek at Blair who was now checking the mantle for dust. "She's not one of those vegans is she?" Dan laughed.

"Most definitely not."

Dan thanked Margie before heading back over to join Blair.

Blair turned around and smiled as Dan started to approach her. "All set?" she asked.

He dangled the key in front of her before bending over and grabbing their bags. Blair gave him a confused look.

"Don't they have someone for that, Cedric?" Blair inquired.

"I think I can handle it, Waldorf."

"Remington," Blair retorted. "Ms. Remington." Her eyes twinkled as Dan gave her an amused smile.

Blair followed Dan up to the third floor. The Rose suite was the last suite on the hall, and Blair prepared herself to be completely underwhelmed. Dan opened the door and immediately dropped the bags on the floor. Blair trailed closely behind. Before she knew what was happening, Dan quickly turned and lunged for her, grabbing her around her waist and shoving her firmly against the door. His eyes were locked squarely onto hers, and the only sound to be heard was of their breathing. Blair's eyes closed shut, her senses lost. There was no turning back now. This was a dangerous step they were taking. They had yet to cross the threshold of full blown adultery. And though they had both decided on this trip together, it felt suddenly different now that they were really here and the moment had finally arrived.

Dan and Blair remained silent, still content with just looking at one another. Dan studied her face-her smooth, creamy complexion and the blush in her cheeks that had been brought on by the cold air and the heat of the moment. She was intoxicating to him. Blair's perfect curls were still bobbing off the shoulders of her green sweater, and her round pouty red lips were stuck in an o shape. This was where Dan's gaze finally came to rest. He started to lean in closer. Ever. So. Slowly.

He had been wanting this for for nearly six years, and he was going to try and savor every single moment. His mouth was watering. Three. Two. One.

Blair's eyes closed shut again at the feel of Dan's hands tightening around her waist. His hands found a bit of exposed skin where her sweater had started to ride up. She slowly moved her hands from their position against the door up to Dan's hips. They methodically crept up his shirt, moving up his chest and coming to rest on his shoulders for a few seconds before reaching around to cup his neck and play with his hair. Dan Humphrey's lips pressed up against hers. The kiss was tender and sweet, but it wasn't long before they both wanted and needed more.

Dan begin to open his lips, urging her to join him. She reciprocated without hesitation, and their tongues clashed together. Dan was now ready to do some additional exploration. His lips began to veer off, leaving a trail of kisses down her cheek. His hand quickly moved up, displacing her hair from her neck and supplanting it with his mouth. He immediately took a tiny nibble from her neck, making Blair gasp. Dan continued to work the same spot and Blair continued to reward him with a series of sighs and moans. He had never forgotten just how vocal she could be and it had never failed to excite him. Blair pressed against him even more as Dan's hands found their way to her ass, giving it a tender squeeze.

"This." Blair finally said, completely out of breath. "I've missed this." Dan pulled back for a moment so he could make a mental picture of what she looked like. Her hair was sufficiently mussed, and her lips were swollen. Her eyes were dark and pleading as she licked her lips and tried to catch her breath.

"What?" Blair asked, genuinely wondering why he had stopped.

Dan shook his head. "It's just...I just can't even describe how beautiful you are." Blair was left speechless by the compliment. She hadn't heard anything remotely close to that come out of Chuck's mouth for a long time.

"Blair. Look at me," Dan commanded. Blair's eyes slowly returned to his and Dan's fingertips found her cheek, slowly caressing her skin. He loved her skin. He could write sonnets about how smooth and porcelain-like it was. Dan pulled her into him once again, kissing her a little more roughly as he slowly pulled her in the direction of the bed, both of them tripping over each other's feet and their bags. Dan was dizzy and thought he suddenly heard ringing as he laid her down.

"Humphrey," Blair said softly, swallowing as Dan began to work a spot along her collarbone. He simply grunted in response.

"Humphrey, I think I hear..." She couldn't think straight. He was encompassing every part of her.

"Yeah," Dan replied as he pulled up. His hand slowly crept underneath her sweater as he once again found her lips.

"No, Dan. I think...I think you're phone is ringing," she finally said loudly as she firmly pushed him away. He let out a sigh of disappointment. Dan sat up and looked around for his bag, cursing himself for not putting his phone on silent. Blair sat up as she tried to make herself presentable. He quickly found his phone in the side pocket of his bag just as the ringing stopped. He gave a worried look as he checked to see who the missed call was from. Dan frowned as he looked up to see Blair staring at him, curiously.

"What?" Blair asked, cocking her head to the side. "Who was it?"

Dan gave a frustrated sigh as the message alert chimed.

"Serena."


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: I figured this would be a good place to thank everyone for reading and reviewing. This is my first attempt at Gossip Girl fan fiction so the feedback means a lot. Like many of you, I was disgusted with the ending of the show and this is my way of dealing with it. Season six was an abomination, as was the last episode of season five. I also hated that they made Dan "Gossip Girl," but have alluded to it in this story because I wanted to find the humor in it. It's truly a joke. **

**For me the first three chapters of this story were a way to re-introduce the characters, so sorry if there seems to be a lot of exposition. **

Chapter Three

"Serena." Blair softly echoed Dan's words. He gave a nod of confirmation before placing the phone back into his bag.

Of course it was Serena. They _were_ married after all. Why should it be a surprise that she was calling him?

"Maybe you should check the message," Blair suggested. "It could be important. What if it's an emergency?" She was sitting straight up on the bed now. The heat of the moment had dissipated. The stark reality that they had merely pushed the pause button on real life was beginning to sink in.

Only a minute earlier they were on the verge of making love for the first time in over six years. In Dan's mind, it felt like no time had even passed and the nightmare of Blair running back to Chuck had never happened. She was back in his arms again, back where he was convinced she always should have been.

But the mood was now lost thanks to an extremely ill-timed phone call from Serena van der Woodsen-Humphrey. His wife.

No, he thought to himself. He was perfectly fine with leaving that message where it was, out in the atmosphere, bouncing between the cell towers. Dan didn't want anything to disturb the perfect world that he and Blair had created for themselves here at this cozy little bed and breakfast by the river. This was supposed to be their time to reconnect. To rediscover old things about each other. And hopefully new things. They were older, wiser. Well, maybe not necessarily wiser. They were both in relationships which meant they were both fully aware of what they were_ lacking_ in those relationships. Dan and Blair had been kids the first time they had gotten together. She was coming out of a bad marriage. And was trying to adjust to being in a relationship for the first time in a long time. With Blair Waldorf. Amidst a group of peers who showed no support whatsoever. It was a lot for a fledgling relationship to endure.

Dan could honestly say that on his end, he had never stopped loving Blair, even after their stint as a couple came to an end. He had never stopped caring about her or wondering how she was doing. This had been evident from his many attempts to win her back before ultimately getting back with Serena. But the same couldn't be said for Blair. She never told Dan she loved him after he initially told her, though he thought she did. He thought he could feel it. But he was competing with Chuck Bass. And Chuck was like an addiction Blair couldn't shake. And no matter how badly he treated her, she kept crawling back for more. Dan had been convinced that Blair would never truly see the light where Chuck was concerned. Until now. Everything was happening so fast now it felt like a dream.

But now Serena's call had ruined everything.

"Yeah," he relented. "If it's an emergency..."

But Blair's lips...they were beckoning him. Of course the last thing he wanted was for Serena to be calling because she had been in some type of accident. Hopefully it would only take two seconds and he could return his attentions to Blair.

"I guess I should..." Dan said as Blair nodded.

Dan retrieved the phone, pressed the message button and placed it against his ear, turning his back to Blair. It was definitely an uncomfortable feeling to have the object of his desire just a few feet away while he checked a voicemail from his wife. Who also happened to be said wife's best friend-or at least she used to be.

_What are you up to? I just called to let you know Mom and I are coming home early. Taking the red eye. Apparently Mayor Bloomberg wants her help with some sort of benefit for the Public Library. Of course she couldn't say no. Anyway, I miss you. Call me when you get this, ok? Love you._

Those last two words felt like a stab wound to the heart. But it wasn't guilt he was feeling. Yes. He was cheating on his wife. Well not officially yet, but he was planning to. And for Blair it was an eye for an eye. Chuck had been sleeping around for years, nearly the entire length of their marriage. She owed it to herself to get some revenge. But with Dan it was different. He wanted something different. Or rather someone. And somehow it felt right. It had always felt right. Dan had counted on two full days of official freedom with Blair, and now that looked to be out of the question. He turned around to face her as she gave him a wan smile, patiently waiting for a report.

"Turns out she and Lily are on their way back from Montecito. They're taking the red eye." Blair pursed her lips in disappointment as Dan moved to sit next to her on the bed. He slid one arm around her and started slowly massaging her back.

She peered up at him. "So maybe that's a sign? The moment of truth and we're interrupted by a phone call from your wife." She smiled, but Dan could see Blair was disappointed. It actually gave him a strange sort of gratification. If there was ever a question that Blair did indeed want him, it was just answered.

"Hey. Aren't you the one who said signs were for the religious, the superstitious, and the lower class?" Dan leaned in to give her a quick kiss. Those lips were highly addictive.

Blair let out a small laugh. "Yes. Yes I did say that. Turns out I should have taken my own advice. But in this case..I just-"

"You're having doubts, then?" Dan queried. But he was already confident that wasn't what this was about. He just wanted to know what was on her mind.

Blair sighed and shook her head. "My marriage hasn't exactly been blissful for a long time, Dan. Or ever really. But yours- you've barely been married a year. And Serena probably has no clue that you'd even be thinking about-"

"You?" Dan interrupted. He wobbled his head from side to side in an attempt to make her laugh. "All the time. Blair, you're the first thought in my head every morning and you're the last thing I think about at night." Blair raised her eyebrows in disbelief. She had forgotten what being wanted felt like. It touched her. She could feel tears forming, burning the corners of her eyes.

"And you know I mean it because I know how high maintenance you are." Blair laughed at this, but the worried look on her face didn't go away.

"Listen, if we're careful no one has to know about this. We keep it low key. No pressure. And no one gets hurt. And when you're ready to officially end things with Chuck..." Dan gave her a knowing glance. "But until you're ready, this can be whatever you need it to be."

Blair nodded and exhaled deeply. Why had she been so afraid of a relationship with Dan before? He always had a way of making her feel safe and secure. Why had she run away from it?

"So." Blair finally decided to break the ice. "I guess we have to head back to the city, then? Or..um..shouldn't you call Serena back?" Dan nodded reluctantly. He grabbed his phone.

"I'm just going to walk down the hall then." Blair smiled, understanding completely. Dan reluctantly left the room, shutting the door softly behind him. He quickly sought out an inconspicuous spot to call his wife. Dan finally opted to go outside, walking down the three flights of stairs to the side exit. The last thing he needed was Margie or any of the other staff to overhear. Now leaning up against the side of the building, Dan dialed Serena's number, shivering and cursing himself that he had ventured outside in thirty degree weather. Serena picked up on the second ring.

"Hey, you! I figured you must have been working on your new book earlier," Serena said cheerfully. "Hopefully I didn't chase your muse away!" Serena's lively voice hit him like a cymbal. Chasing his muse away was precisely what she had done. At home, Serena rarely took any interest in Dan's writing except to occasionally ask if he'd written anything about her. The joke got old.

"No, I was uh..I was actually just getting to a stopping point. Just wanted to finish this chapter. It's going really well," he lied. "So you'll be home in the morning, then?" Dan was secretly hoping he had heard that part of the message incorrectly. Or that there had been another change in plans.

"Yeah! Oh, and I have planned a special night out for us tomorrow so clear your schedule!" Dan cringed. He was glad there was no Facetime being utilized, or she would have seen just how completely unexcited he actually was.

"Uh, a special night? What kind of special night?" Dan tried to make his voice cheerful. He wasn't super big on surprises, especially the ones that Serena concocted.

"That's for me to know, and for you to find out, mister. Oh mom's yelling at me and I've got to finish packing before the car gets here. Can't wait to see you! Love you." Thankfully she hung up before Dan was forced to say it back. He contemplated the conversation he had just had with his wife. Most men would have been scrambling to hightail it out of there, but Dan was surprisingly calm. Even he had to admit it was a bit disconcerting how little regard he had for her at this point. But love makes you do crazy things.

Dan checked the time on his phone. If they played their cards right, he could still make the most out of his time with Blair. They just had to be back by morning. Early morning, but still. They had time. Dan turned to make his way back inside. As the door closed shut, Margie came around the corner. She had been taking a smoke break, and she just happened to overhear Dan's, or rather Cedric's, very interesting conversation.

Up in the room, Blair had quickly gotten to work. She had changed into a new, black La Perla bustier set, complete with lace up corset down the front. It had been a while since she had someone to wear something like this for.

She looked around. Blair had to give Dan props because the room was indeed charming. From the arrangement of miniature roses on the antique dresser, to the beautiful quilt on the bed, it really was a lovely room-perfect for a writer and his muse. And she was going to show him exactly how much it meant to her. More specifically, how much _he_ meant to her.

Blair took one last look in the mirror, straightening her stockings and attaching the garter straps. She pulled her hair around so it draped perfectly along her creamy shoulders. She quickly touched up her lip gloss, then turned out the light, leaving a single lamp lit on the side table. Blair was making herself comfortable on the bed when there was a knock on the door.

"Who is it?" She called out seductively.

"Uh, it's Tony. I'm here to deliver your dinner." It almost sounded like a voice hitting puberty.

What a buzzkill.

"Oh shit!" Blair yelped a little more loudly than she should have. She quickly scrambled for her coverup, hoping Dan wasn't on his way back up to the room just yet. "Um, just a second!"

When she finally opened the door she saw a young man standing before her with a tray. Slightly agitated, she rapidly motioned for him to enter. He was trying hard not to stare at her ensemble, but he was unsuccessful. Even with the cover up he could see almost everything. She glared at him.

Blair was pleased to see that a bottle of champagne and two flutes had accompanied the meal. Or maybe it was just sparkling wine. Either way, a little alcohol, she remembered, had always gone a long way in adding a little extra umph to their sexual encounters. Though she was sure they would be fine regardless this time around.

Tony set the tray down on the dresser as his eyes fixated on Blair's cleavage. He started to retreat, but when he got to the door he paused. It didn't take Blair long to figure out he was waiting on his tip. Wasn't allowing him to stare at her cleavage enough? Blair rolled her eyes and quickly grabbed her purse. She grabbed the first bill she found in her wallet, which was a fifty. She quickly shoved it into his hand, then shooed him away. The last thing she heard before slamming the door in his face was, "Holy crap!"

Blair was now feeling a bit nervous. She eyed the bottle of wine on the dresser, deciding now was as good a time as any for a little libation. She gently worked open the bottle, popping the cork. Forgoing the glass, she took a giant swig. Then another. And another. And one more for good measure. She was now good to go.

She returned to her place on the bed, trying to figure out which pose would work best for a Humphrey seduction. Blair first tried a position lying on her stomach, legs kicking to and fro in the air. She then rolled over to her left side, propping her head up with her hand. Finally, Blair opted for a lean back position, propping herself up on her hands, legs slightly parted. Her timing was perfect.

Dan entered the room, completely caught off guard by the change in ambiance and Blair's new ensemble. She grinned, teasing him as her legs slowly opened and closed, giving him teasing glimpses of what he was in store for. His jaw dropped. He was dead.

Dead.

"See anything you like?" Blair spoke softly, biting her lip. Dan couldn't speak. He had never gotten so hard so fast in his entire life. This was why they were here, but it was still unexpected and more than pleasant surprise.

"Why don't you come here, then?" Blair whispered softly as she ran her right hand along the bed, inviting him to join her. Dan did what he was told, kicking off his shoes then eagerly joining Blair in the spot she had reserved for him. She instantly got to work unbuttoning his shirt, taking her time with each button. He watched her intently as she licked her lips, pulling little smirks every so often. Dan wanted to pounce on her with every fiber of his being, but he let her continue running the show. Finally she made her way down to his belt, quickly whipping it off, and curling it in her hands. She ran it along his chest before letting it fall to the floor. He smiled as her hand ran down over the bulge in his pants and cocked his head back in appreciation. She worked him for a moment before going in for the kill, unzipping him and removing his pants completely. Dan's head came back up and his eyes started to creep down Blair's body. It was his turn now.

He moved in, peeling one of the thin, spaghetti straps from her shoulder. She watched with baited breath as he leaned in slightly to play with her covered breasts. Dan carefully caressed each one, then worked on untying the ribbons on the front of her bustier. He now had complete access to her breasts, but continued pulling the bustier down even further. Roughly. He tickled and caressed each breast, then leaned down to suck a nipple, causing her to gasp.

He carefully pushed Blair down on the bed as he continued to work her, eventually moving his mouth lower and lower down her body towards her slit. Her breath hitched as she whimpered a tiny "yes." That innocent sound was all it took, and he knew he had to speed up. Dan pulled up, crashing his mouth onto hers. His hands continued to roam everywhere, and his fingers found her garter strap. He yanked and released it, causing it to slap against her bare skin. Blair's response was a breathy moan. His fingers worked their way towards her center until they finally found their intended target. Roughly yanking her panties aside, she gasped as he moved his fingers inside of her. There was no time to waste when he realized how unbelievably wet and ready she was for him. Pulling her up to straddle him, he watched as she impaled herself onto his hard length. After over six years of pent up frustration, Dan Humphrey and Blair Waldorf were united once again.

Dan grabbed Blair's hips, holding her in place. He watched in awe as Blair took control, speeding up the pace. Her breasts were bouncing before him, and he caught a nipple between his teeth, giving it a playful bite. It was all she needed to send her completely over the edge. She leaned her head back in ecstasy as he pounded into her, screaming his name over and over as she came hard. Dan came right after her as she rode him out to completion, never taking his eyes off of her as she collapsed in his arms. It was everything he had dreamed about.

Blair let herself fall backwards on the bed in exhaustion, out of breath and delirious as she wiped a strand of perspiration from her forehead. Dan immediately joined her, gripping her hips tightly and pulling her into him.

"Dan?" Blair whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry I never said it."

"Said what?"

"I love you."

There was very little talking after that. They made love again and again until their bodies were unable to take anymore. It was all the communication that was necessary. Everything felt unbelievably perfect, and neither of them wanted to think about going back to their real lives.

But all good things must come to an end.

And at dawn, the town car arrived.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Upon his return home, Dan immediately hopped in the shower, reluctantly washing any remaining traces of Blair from his body. Short on time, they had literally gone from the bed to the town car in order to beat Serena back to the city. Dan quickly dried off and made his way into the bedroom. He slipped on a pair of boxers, grabbed a t-shirt to wear and a pair of jeans from the bag he had taken on his trip. He looked around the room. Dan then noticed the bed was still made. He walked over to it, pulling back the sheets and comforter from one side so it looked sufficiently slept in, then quickly got to work on unpacking the rest of his bag.

Dan was exhausted, completely spent from the previous night's activities. He threw his shoes into the closet and shoved the rest of his unworn clothing back into the drawers. When he was done, he walked into the kitchen and flipped on the coffee maker. He poured himself a cup and walked to the living room. Sinking into the couch, Dan stared at the laptop sitting on the coffee table in front of him. A blank page stared back at him. He wanted to recount every moment of the time he had just spent with Blair, but somehow words would never be adequate. Being with her was simply indescribable. How could he sufficiently put into words the smoothness of her skin, or the sounds she made when completely consumed by orgasm. Or the deep brown eyes which held him hostage, when there was literally nothing in the world to compare it to?

Dan exhaled. He now sat upright on the couch, his eyes periodically checking the door for signs of Serena. His body twitched with every sound, no matter how slight and he noticed his foot was tapping uncontrollably on the floor. He literally had to place his hand on his knee to hold it steady.

No, Dan Humphrey wasn't feeling especially sharp today. How would he be able to hide this from Serena? The lack of sleep coupled with the excitement of finally being with Blair combined with the betrayal of his marriage. It was all finally starting to sink in. And it causing a bit of anxiety.

It took a return to the city for Dan to realize that he had just done something so completely out of character and so opposite of who he was. But how could it be wrong when it was something that his body had pushed him to do. He had wanted Blair for so long that he hardly even considered the consequences of his actions. There was definitely a feeling of discomfort that had begun to seep into his bloodstream. The memory of the pleasurable state he had experienced only hours earlier was slowly being overshadowed. But if this discomfort was in fact guilt, it certainly wasn't enough for Dan to regret having done it in the first place. It was only enough to consider that there were other people who could ultimately be affected by his actions should they ever find out.

He was now an adulterer. The word itself repulsed him. He recalled the memory of his mother leaving his family to be with a man in Hudson while he was in high school. He, his sister, and his father were all devastated, and to this day, he was still angry about it. But now he was no different. Only now he understood that these things weren't always so black and white. At least this time there were no children involved...at least on his end.

There were so many things to think about. And exactly how to act normal after committing adultery was certainly nothing he'd ever had to consider. Would Serena be able to see it in his eyes? Or sense it when they kissed? Would his voice somehow sound different to her? How was it even possible to act normal?

Serena had called him when she landed to let him know that she and Lily were on their way from the airport. Serena. His wife of one year. Dan had returned to Manhattan only mere minutes before receiving her call.

The ride back to the city from the inn was something he wouldn't soon forget. The car had come to pick Dan and Blair up at four AM. They hadn't slept at all. The food that had been delivered to their room had gone uneaten. They had been...busy. They did make good use of the champagne/wine, however.

Dan definitely couldn't complain.

He would have done just about anything in order to fuck Blair Waldorf again.

He simply felt more alive with Blair, whether it be sharing secret walks in Central Park, "accidentally" running into one another at the Met to see the latest exhibit, or simply sitting back to back in cozy coffee shops in Williamsburg. Talking wasn't even necessary. Just sitting near each other was enough. Dan couldn't fight his urges to see Blair, even if that meant lying to his wife. It was selfish and terrible, but he needed her. He knew he would leave Serena in a heartbeat if Blair ever asked him to, no questions asked. But Blair was in a precarious position. She had Henry to think about, not to mention a company. He knew her mother had tightened the reins on her with the fluctuating success of Waldorf Designs.

And then there was Chuck.

Dan knew Chuck could make life hell for both of them if they were ever discovered.

If they were to ever move beyond the point of no return in their relationship, it would have to be Blair initiating it. Dan couldn't push her. Until then, he was just happy to be in her life. Even if that meant playing the happy spouse to Serena.

Dan took a sip of coffee as he leaned over his keyboard, still reflecting on the events of the past few hours. The sex had been simply incredible, better than he ever remembered it, and he seemed to recall some amazing encounters. Dan wasn't sure if it was childbirth, or simply maturity, but Blair's body was even more supple and pliant than he remembered. She had shown her vulnerability, allowing herself to relax and completely let herself go. He could feel the trust she had in him. He recalled the image of Blair writhing underneath him, her eyes looking up at him and her hands lightly skimming his abdomen as he thrust into her over and over again. He couldn't wait to relive it.

They had said very little on the ride back, but just one night together had changed everything. Now that their affair was a full blown reality, there was nothing that needed to be said. He felt closer to Blair than he ever had before, sexually and emotionally.

Dan recalled how the moonlight shone through the window of the town car, reflecting off of Blair's liquid brown eyes as she stared out the window, lost in thought. He simply watched her, memorizing every detail of her face, wanting to say something but not wanting to disturb her. She didn't seem unhappy, just reflective. He had no idea what she would be returning to when they got back to the city and it physically pained him to think of Blair lying in bed, lonely and sad, her son and husband nowhere to be found.

Dan knew the image of her staring out the window would forever be preserved in his memory, but the writer in him needed to do more. Writing about her was a way to keep her close even when he couldn't physically be with her.

As he began to place his fingers on the keys, he was interrupted by the sound of the elevator doors opening. A startled Dan instantly slammed his keyboard shut, as he stood up from his seat at the couch. Seconds later, Serena came in with Vanya following close behind her, pushing a luggage cart.

"Thanks, Vanya, you can just leave that stuff here. My sweet hubby can get the rest." Vanya turned and gave Dan an odd look as Serena gave him a flirtatious smile. For a second, Dan was slightly concerned about the look Vanya had given him. It suddenly occurred to him that perhaps he had been spotted coming in this morning through the service entrance of the building.

He swallowed hard, considering the possibility of who else could have seen him sneak in during the early morning hours. His heart started to beat like a freight train. Paranoia and Dan Humphrey were not a good combination.

Dan walked over to Serena, leaning in to give her a quick peck on the cheek.

"Anything else, Mrs. Humphrey?" Vanya asked as he pulled the last of the bags off of the cart.

"Nope! I think I'm all good. Thanks, Vanya." Vanya gave Dan a cryptic nod before pulling the cart behind him back towards the elevator. After Vanya was gone, Serena turned to Dan.

"So is that all I get?" She gave him a pouty look, cocking her head to one side and sticking out her bottom lip out as she wrapped her arms around Dan's neck, pulling him in closely and crashing her mouth onto his. Dan tried to reciprocate, but instantly knew he wasn't matching her enthusiasm. She pulled back and gave him a curious look.

"You're acting weird," she declared. "What have you been up to?" She glanced over his shoulder, looking at the laptop sitting on the table. He instantly turned to see what she was looking at and it gave him an idea.

"Oh you know. I just have this massive case of writer's block." That sounded good, he thought to himself. He was a writer after all. He had imagination. He could come up with something that sounded halfway truthful and Serena would probably buy it in a heartbeat. There was no need to be nervous, he decided.

He continued. "And I'm starting to feel the pressure, you know? I didn't sleep well at all last night, and I've got a Friday deadline. I just don't know how I'm going to get it all done." That was actually the truth.

Serena leaned in, caressing his hair. "Oh my poor baby. I know it must be hard for you to sleep when I'm not around." The statement wasn't really untrue, but not for the reasons Serena was thinking.

"What can I do to make it better?" He was sure there was some sexual connotation to that question, but that was the absolute last thing he wanted. Dan felt himself start to fidget a bit and then the words, with no thoughts behind them whatsoever, began to suddenly spew from his mouth. The hyper-verbal Dan train was leaving the station.

"You know? I'm alright I think. I just have to...I think I might just go...you know maybe I'll run out and get us some coffee...oh wait, but I already have coffee made...or maybe I'll just go grab us some pastries...you want a pastry...or you know maybe I just need to go and lie down." Dan took a deep breath. He sounded like a bumbling idiot and he knew it.

Serena gave him a concerned look. "Dan...are you sure you're ok?" she placed her hand on Dan's forehead, checking for signs of fever. He forced a smile, pulling her hand from his head. "I'm fine," he assured her. "Like I said, just this deadline is getting to me, that's all." Serena nodded, but didn't say anything.

"Maybe I should just try and sleep for a while. And then, you said you have some surprise planned..later?" His voice drifted off as he forced a smile and Serena's eyes grew wide with excitement.

"Yes, I do! And I think you're really gonna like it!" She said as she gave Dan a big hug. Dan brought his arms up slightly to try to reciprocate but...nope. He just wasn't feeling it.

"Ok, well then if you're just going to sleep, I'm going to get out of here for a while. I've got way too much energy to just sit here," she explained, checking the time on her phone. "So you take your nap. I think I'm going to go shop for a bit. And then I might stop by and see Blair. I haven't seen her in a while. Should probably make sure she's ok. You haven't seen her, have you?" Dan gulped at the question.

"Uh, no. Where would I have seen her? I've been too busy trying to finish this chapter," Dan replied, sounding perhaps a bit too defensive. Serena furrowed her brow.

"Hmm, okay." Serena seemed to have bought it. "Well, then get some rest. I guess I'll see you later then?" Serena grabbed her purse, then leaned into Dan's lips for another kiss. "I missed you so much."

And with that, Serena was off again. He waited until he heard the sound of the elevator doors close before collapsing back onto the couch. He heaved a huge sigh of relief. Dan had handled that with as little grace as possible, yet she didn't seem to suspect anything. That was a good sign. Still, he wanted to bang his head against the door. This was going to be harder than he thought.

Dan grabbed his phone, immediately wanting to text Blair and warn her about the surprise visit she would be getting later. He thought for a moment, then set it back down. He didn't want her to think he was smothering her. They had only just parted a couple of hours ago. They would have to trust that the other could properly handle their own spouse as well as the other's. And he knew Blair was far more versed in the art of manipulation than he was. She would be able to handle an impromptu visit from Serena with no problem, he decided.

He grabbed his laptop and headed for the bedroom. He needed to sleep. Perhaps with a few z's under his belt he would be better equipped to properly deal with his fledgling affair. As his head crashed into his pillow on the bed that he shared with his wife of a year, his eyes shut tightly. Hopefully, when he woke up, he would have some answers on how to navigate this new world. He was Dan Humphrey. Husband and cheater.

* * *

Blair couldn't stop herself from smiling, even with the almost unbearably hot water from the shower raining down over her and reviving her from her bleary state. She looked down and watched as the beads of water trickle down her stomach, instantly flashing to where Dan's fingers and tongue had been only hours earlier. She thought about asking Dan to shower with her back at the bed and breakfast, but time was not on their side. Returning to the city before Serena came home was the priority.

The good news, though, was that Dan had most definitely picked up a few new tricks since she had last been with him. Blair was already thrumming with anticipation at the thought of possible locations and positions she wanted to experiment with him. The inherent danger of sneaking around was a definite turn on, as were other things... Her mouth watered as she recalled how absolutely delicious his shoulders now looked.

As she ran her fingers through her wet her, feeling for any remnants of leftover conditioner, she contemplated what this would all mean going forward. She wanted Dan. That much was certain. She told him that she loved him, which was another milestone in their relationship. And although he had made it clear there would be no pressure on her from his end to leave Chuck, she couldn't help but feel a little bad that the state of their relationship hinged completely on her. But he seemed to understand that everything had to be handled delicately, should it ever come to that. Divorcing Chuck would bring her two divorces in a relatively short time span. She had already endured the wrath of whispers and smirks following her record breaking marriage to Louis, not to mention the looks she got from people following her less than traditional wedding ceremony in Central Park. She and Chuck were subsequently led away by police officers for questioning in the death of Chuck's father. To divorce Chuck now..well she'd look like a fool. Again.

Aside from Dan, Blair was fairly certain that no one really knew about Chuck's womanizing. He was good at hiding it and had even managed to build up a decent reputation after Bart's demise. But Bart still haunted him. And over the years he took it out on Blair in various ways. Most notably by fucking other women. It was painful, but she had Dan now. Chuck wasn't the only one who could have his cake and eat it, too. But she could hardly pretend that she wouldn't enjoy it if she ever had the opportunity to throw her own affair in Chuck's face. She couldn't do that to Dan, though. And she couldn't do it to Serena-even if in the past Serena had slept with not one, but two of her boyfriends. Blair and Serena weren't as close as they once were, but they had essentially been on solid footing since her wedding to Dan-solid footing meaning they were rarely around each other anymore, and unable to cause trouble for the other.

Blair was busy with Waldorf Designs, and Serena had her...philanthropy. Children, marriage, and the simple passage of time could do that to a friendship. Blair hardly felt bad about it, though. It had always been a friendship of convenience.

Blair sighed as she rinsed the soap from her body. Today, all she wanted to do was retire to her bed...and perhaps relive the highlights from the previous evening. She exited the shower, grabbing a towel and quickly drying herself off before slipping on her robe. She then looked in the mirror, noting how the color had returned to her cheeks. It was obviously from the heat of the water, but Blair told herself that a certain Humphrey had played a part in it as well. On her recent trip to Paris, she had been looking a little peaked, working around the clock trying to shore up orders for her Spring collection and putting out last minute fires. She had left Jenny in charge at the atelier in Paris upon the conclusion of Fashion Week with no plans to return any time soon-which didn't exactly sit well with Eleanor. Since then, Blair had been avoiding her mother's calls. She knew she'd eventually have to endure a tongue lashing from her. But she knew Jenny could handle it. Blair was now a bit...occupied with her brother.

Besides, she was actually doing some work in New York, setting up meetings with buyers that would carry her through the New Year. It wasn't like she had_ completely_ abandoned the company, she told herself.

Blair exhaled, laying her head on the pillow. She felt good. But then it suddenly occurred to her that it was probably early evening in Dubai. She hadn't spoken to Henry or Chuck in over a week. What kind of mother goes that long without speaking to her child?" Blair was suddenly disgusted with herself. Not that it was completely her fault. Chuck was as much to blame for keeping her child away from her. She silently cursed him for the giant rift he was single-handedly creating between her and her son.

Without hesitating a moment more, Blair grabbed her phone and dialed Chuck's number. She was completely unsurprised when it went to voicemail. Chuck's greeting was the standard, "Leave a message." She did as required.

"Chuck, it's me. I figured I would have heard from you two by now. I'd like to talk to my son." Her voice was calm but there was an inkling of irritation sprinkled into her words. "Please call me."

She laid the phone over on her nightstand. The truth was she felt like a failure as a mother. When she gave birth to Henry, she told herself she would be able to juggle it all while being a better mother than Eleanor had ever been to her. But somehow her life had gotten away from her. The next thing she knew, Waldorf Designs was demanding nearly all of her time. Initially she took Henry everywhere she went, but Chuck put the brakes on that fairly quickly, complaining that he never got to see his son. That's when he insisted on hiring a nanny. He told Blair it was perfectly normal for a couple with demanding lives such as theirs to have one, and that it was nothing to be ashamed of. Dorota would take care of the apartment and the running of the household, and the nanny would watch Henry so he didn't have to be uprooted from his life here in New York so often while his parents traveled the globe for work.

Unfortunately, Chuck was soon changing the rules. The nanny and Henry started accompanying him on nearly all of his trips. They definitely weren't all business trips either. Blair laid there as she tried to pinpoint when exactly her marriage started to completely go off the rails, as she started to drift off.

Just as Blair fell asleep, her phone rang. She shot up, quickly lunging for the phone, not wanting to miss the opportunity to talk to her son.

"Hello?" she answered enthusiastically.

"B? That sure was a friendly greeting!" Blair was completely caught off guard. She hadn't spoken to Serena in weeks.

"Serena? Oh, yeah. I um..." Wait. Why was she all of a sudden calling? Was Dan with her? She racked her brain over what Serena could possibly want. "Well, I'm kind of expecting a phone call," Blair started to explain, hoping to end the conversation, but Serena didn't take the hint.

"Well, I was actually seeing if I could stop by in about an hour or so. I have something I kind of want to discuss with you." Oh shit. What did she want to discuss? Surely this couldn't be about Dan.

Blair exhaled. "I guess...that would be ok," she replied reluctantly. "I was trying to get some rest. Didn't sleep well last night. And it's just been one of those mornings, you know?"

"Wow," Serena laughed. "Must be something in the water here in New York. Dan didn't sleep well either." Blair's eyes grew wide. He told her that?

"I, on the other hand, slept like a dream at thirty-thousand feet!" She added. "Nothing like sleeping in the clouds." If only she knew...

"Yeah, I guess." Blair replied.

"So, listen. I'll get a couple of dry caps and I'll be over soon! Can't wait to see you!" With that, Serena hung up, leaving Blair slightly irritated. Did she not make it clear that she was tired? This was the absolute last thing she wanted to deal with right now. She reluctantly got up out of bed, debating whether or not she felt up to putting on real clothes. She finally decided against it. If Serena was going to insist on interrupting her morning, then she was determined to stay comfortable. It occurred to her to send Dan a text to ask what this was about, but realized it might be too soon. She didn't want to seem needy.

Blair made her way downstairs, and for the next hour sat in front of the television, finding out that with hundreds of channels there was still nothing on worth watching, not that she ever had time to anyway. She briefly paused on the Turner Classic Movies channel which was currently airing "An Affair To Remember." Ah yes, she thought to herself, remembering the time Chuck had given her an ultimatum to meet him on the top of the Empire State Building.

Asshole couldn't even wait five fucking minutes.

She clicked off the television upon hearing a knock at the door. Blair took her time getting up and walking over to open it. Right before opening the door, she put on her faux happy face. "Serena!" she said with fake enthusiasm.

Serena stood before her looking as beautiful as ever in simple jeans, sweater and scarf, holding two dry caps and a white paper bag.

"I brought croissants!" she said, as if it were the most exciting breakfast pastry in the world. She leaned in to give Blair a quick kiss on the cheek before sidling past her and making herself at home, taking a seat on the couch. "I feel like I haven't seen you in forever!"

"Well, it has been a few weeks. I'm busy with WD, and you're-" She didn't really know exactly what Serena did. And from her conversations with him, Dan didn't know either. Luckily Serena interrupted her before she found herself making a nasty comment.

"B, you do look tired. Have you been working too hard?" Of course Serena would tell her she looks tired. Perhaps she didn't mean it like that, but of course Blair took it that way.

Blair finally caved, realizing Serena obviously planned on staying for a while. She walked over and took a seat beside her on the couch, helping herself to a cappuccino.

"Yeah, well I'm a little stressed. You know, the holidays are coming up, and I have all these meetings, everything's a little crazy..." She took a sip of her coffee. "So what did you want to talk about?" Blair asked a bit disinterestedly, hoping to get to the gist of the conversation.

_Did you want to discuss the fact that I rode your husband's cock all night long until we couldn't see straight and eventually blacked out? _

_Stop it Blair. _She hid a smirk as Serena popped a bit of her croissant into her mouth. She turned to Blair and took a deep breath. "Well, tonight, I want to tell Dan that I'm ready."

"Ready?" Blair asked, a confused look on her face. Serena nodded eagerly.

"Ok..I give. Ready for what?" The gleam in Serena's eye was starting to irritate her.

"Well, we've been married a year, and that's about how long you and Chuck waited before conceiving..."

Blair's eyes narrowed. She suddenly felt a migraine coming on and wanted nothing more than to run up the stairs and crawl back into her bed. Serena wanted to have a baby. Dan's baby. This was not a topic she wanted to discuss. Ever. Blair massaged her temples for a moment, squeezing her eyes shut.

"B?" Serena became concerned when Blair didn't say anything in response.

"Yeah? Still here."

"Well?

"Well what?" Blair asked flatly.

"Well, what's the best way to broach the subject?" At that moment, Blair was praying for some sort of relief. An earthquake. A tornado. Couldn't Serena see that she wasn't feeling well? She needed someone or something..anything that would save her from this utterly uncomfortable conversation. Then like a flash of light from the heavens, Dorota appeared at the door.

"Oh hello, Ms. Serena," Dorota greeted. "Ms. Blair, I don't think you be here today. You say you have work thingy _all_ weekend? Very important. So I don't go to grocery. Because no Ms. Blair, No Mister Chuck. No Mister Henry..."

Of course she would bring up the fact that Blair hadn't planned on being here this weekend. And that her husband and child were nowhere to be found.

"It's fine, Dorota. I'll make do," Blair interrupted, smiling as she fiddled with the ties on her robe.

"When Mister Chuck and Mister Henry come home?" she pressed.

"I'm not really sure, Dorota. But as soon as I hear something I will let you know. Now, feel free to take the rest of the day off because I think I hear your children calling you from Queens." Dorota gave Blair a suspicious look.

"But I make plans to do the shopping today!" she said emphatically.

"And _I_ said don't worry about it. You can go on Monday. In the meantime I'll order in."

"But-

"No but, Dorota." Dorota stood there, looking completely confused.

"Bye." Blair gave her a tiny wave. She was glaring at her now, and Dorota frowned. She finally did as she was told and slinked back towards the door.

"Bye," Blair called out again. Dorota's eyes narrowed as she turned around once more before walking out. Now if only Serena would follow her.

Blair turned back to face Serena, who was eyeing her suspiciously. "Are you sure you're ok, B?" Uh...did she not try to explain to Serena earlier that she was tired? She definitely wasn't a brainiac, this one.

"Fine, S. Just fine."

Serena shrugged.

"So anyway, I was thinking about taking Dan to Jean-Georges, you know where we had our first date? Maybe broach the subject then..." Blair bit her lip, jealousy rippling through her veins. "What do you think?"

Blair paused for a moment as if truly considering the plan, then cleared her throat.

"Well if that's what you want, S. But personally..." Blair's manipulative tendencies were starting to kick in.

"What?" Serena flipped her hair from one shoulder to the other, as she listened intently.

Blair shook her head. "I don't want to tell you how to run your marriage..and if you think you're ready for kids, well..." She just couldn't help herself.

"Well what?" Serena leaned in.

"I just think, personally, if I were to do it all over again, I would want a little more time before crossing that bridge, you know what I mean? That's all." It wasn't a lie, but her motive for giving such advice was completely selfish. In no way did she want to think about Dan conceiving a child with Serena. And Blair loved her son, but the second he was born he became direct competition for Chuck's attentions. Henry's birth wasn't the only reason their marriage had gone sour, but it had definitely played a large part.

Serena looked confused. "Are you saying you regret having Henry?"

"No. I'm just trying to tell you that in my experience, kids change everything. They're really a lot of responsibility."

"So you're saying you don't think I'm responsible?" Serena was starting to get agitated. She stood up from the couch and crossed her arms. This wasn't what Blair had intended to happen, but she couldn't say she was completely dissatisfied with the turn the conversation had taken.

"Let me ask you something, Blair. When's the last time you even saw your child? Was it a few days ago? Or weeks, maybe?"

Blair scoffed. "So I make one comment about how difficult child rearing is, Serena, and suddenly you're judging my parenting? You certainly have a lot of nerve!"

"You just said I wasn't responsible!"

"That's not exactly what I said. But now that you've said it, I can't say I disagree. You aren't responsible. You go through life without a care in the world! You don't even have a job! And, you know, not that its any of your business, but Henry is currently receiving some valuable cultural lessons with his father in Dubai!"

"Oh? Is that what they call it? Well if that's the case, I don't think Henry is the only one receiving 'lessons.' I hear his father is getting a few himself." Serena's words stung, and Blair could feel herself turning red. How did Serena even know about..who had she been talking to? Surely Dan wouldn't have said anything to her. Would he?

Blair took a deep breath. "I don't know what you think you know, or who you've been talking to, so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. You have precisely three seconds to get out of my home."

"You don't have to ask me twice," Serena replied, roughly grabbing her purse and heading for the door. She opened it and slammed it hard behind her. Blair could feel the burning sensation of tears forming in her eyes as she collapsed onto the couch. Second later tears started to come down in a flood. Serena had been right. She was a horrible mother who never saw her child. And her husband was cheating on her. After a few minutes of bawling into a throw pillow, she sprang up.

She needed to see him.

Blair quickly reached for her phone and sent off a text to Dan.

_"Meet me at my office?"_

She nervously waited for a response, and thankfully didn't have to wait long.

_"Are you ok?"_

_"No. Thirty minutes?"_

_"Ok."_

Blair quickly ran up the stairs to change. She threw on a blue Stella McCartney Ridley dress, then quickly applied some makeup to try and cover her blotchy skin and red eyes, and pulled her hair back into a ponytail. She was out the door in record time and quickly hailed a taxi.

Blair let herself into the atelier, which was empty. Looking around, she could see a variety of projects in progress. It was a complete mess. She would have to yell at someone about that at some point, but she didn't have time to worry about that now. She looked at her phone to see if Dan had called her to tell her he was running late, but there were no messages. Finally she heard a knock at the door. She went to open it, pulling Dan inside roughly by his collar.

"What happened, Blair? Serena told me she was going to see you, and then I just got a text from her saying she had a fight with you and that she was going for some retail therapy?" Blair felt herself start to tear up again.

"What's wrong, Blair?" Dan took a step toward her and she took a deep breath, refusing to look him in the eye.

"Did you tell Serena that Chuck's been cheating on me and that I barely ever see my son?!" Dan gave her a confused look.

"No. Absolutely not. Why? Did she say that?" Dan was concerned as he looked at Blair. Her lip was trembling as she tried to speak.

"It doesn't matter. Because if she knows all of Manhattan knows." Tears were starting to stream down her face again. "I just..I don't understand. Why do I let him do this to me? Over and over! And I just..." She was sobbing now as Dan pulled her close to him.

"Shhh. It's ok, Blair. You're going to be fine." They stayed like that for a couple of minutes before Blair finally lifted her head from Dan's tearstained shoulder, locking eyes with him.

"I need you," she whispered. Dan's heart skipped a beat as he realized need was calling him as well. They stared at each other for a few more seconds, a silent understanding shared. Dan took a moment to move a loose strand of Blair's hair behind her ear before leaning in to close the gap between them. Blair's heart was beating rapidly as he gently pressed his lips into hers. She responded by running her fingers through his hair. Everything suddenly felt right again. She believed him when he told her everything would be ok.

She began to unbutton his shirt, but only got half way down when Dan suddenly lifted her up, his hands cradling her bottom as he walked her over to the nearest wall. She gripped his shoulders tightly as he propped her up. She instantly spasmed at the feel of his warm hands. He began hiking up her dress as his fingers roughly massaged into her thighs. Blair kissed him hungrily. The friction of their bodies rubbing together was getting Blair hotter by the second. Dan's fingers started to drift over from her thigh, lightly skimming over the center of her panties, and she nearly came right then.

He held her in place as she wrapped her legs around him tightly and she felt him give a small thrust. She understood. He set her down for a moment and she soon found her hands unbuckling his belt and sliding his jeans down. She watched as they fell into a pile around his ankles. Dan assisted her by helping her tugging down his boxers before turning his attention back onto her. He roughly lifted her up again, and pushed his hand back under her dress, moving her panties aside and plunging two fingers inside of her. He watched her face as she cried out again and knew he couldn't hold back any longer. She screamed in ecstasy as he pushed his aching cock inside of her. She was so tight around him and they quickly found a rhythm, their hips thrusting furiously against each other. Dan couldn't take his eyes off of her as her head fell back against the cold brick wall.

"Yes. Dan. Oh..God. Fuck. Yes. Fuck me. Yes!" she screamed out, encouraging him as he sped up the pace, his panting growing heavier and desperate. He loved it when she cursed.

"So good, Blair. You're so good. It's just...so...fucking good."

Dan could tell she was close, her fingernails were practically ripping through the shoulders of his shirt.

"There, Dan. Yes right..Oh God! Yes!" She shouted as she came. Dan gave her one more thrust before exploding inside of her.

"Shit! Holy.. fuck!" He yelled as he collapsed into her, still holding her up against the wall as her dress fell back into place. Dan rested his head against Blair's chest, trying to catch his breath. "Holy shit, Blair."

"Yeah," Blair said, still panting as she ran her fingers through his hair. She needed a cigarette. "Well I certainly feel better."

Dan grinned, realizing he had been responsible for the miraculous change in her mood. He leaned in to kiss her again, an agonizingly slow kiss. He then gently lowered Blair to the ground, taking a moment to help her straighten herself up before reaching down for his jeans and sliding them back on. He reached out to caress her chin, holding her gaze for a moment. There was a sudden change in her eyes that he didn't understand.

"You should probably go," Blair said softly. And a little coldly. "Serena will probably be looking for you. I think she's got something planned for you tonight. And I've got...some work to do here so..."

"Blair-" He wasn't ready to leave. She was obviously going through something and he wanted to be here for her.

"What, Dan? You know you don't have to feel sorry for me," she interrupted angrily.

"I don't feel..that's not what-" Dan didn't know how they had gone from fucking against the wall to arguing.

"Just go," she pleaded. Dan knew when Blair got this way, the best thing to do was to leave her alone.

"I'll call you," Dan said softly, as he walked to the door. He turned around one last time and she gave him a simple nod.

He felt empty as he made his way onto the street. It was going to be impossible not to think about her. He grabbed his phone to see that he had missed several texts from Serena.

_"Decided to come home. Where are you?"_

_"I thought you were going to try and sleep?"_

_"Dan, where are you?" _

Shit, Dan thought to himself as he hailed a taxi. Shit, shit, shit.

Blair sat down at her desk. She grabbed a pile of papers and had just begun sifting through them when her phone rang. She reached for it furiously when she saw who it was. Chuck.

"Finally, Chuck!" She screamed into the phone. "What the hell do you think you're doing!?"

"Nice to hear your voice, too, Blair."

"Stop playing games, Chuck. I want to talk to my son."

"Well, he's taking a nap now. Perhaps when he wakes up-"

"I want to talk to him now, Chuck! Put him on the phone!"

"Blair, calm down. You can-"

"I will not calm down. You are playing games again, and you're using my child against me."

"Blair, I don't think you're understanding me."

"Well then by all means please explain!"

"You can talk to your son when he wakes up, Blair. He's at home. Waiting for you."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

"Chuck!" Blair stormed into her bedroom where he was ceremoniously undressing. He calmly looked up as he unbuttoned his cuffs and pulled off his tie.

"How dare you! How dare you keep my son away from me for this long!" She threw her purse on the bed in disgust.

"Relax, Blair. I was just trying to give you some space. I know how stressed you've been with WD. We hadn't even heard from you so I just figured you appreciated having time to yourself. Just hope you used it wisely."

"How dare you condescend to me! You have no right to just fly my son out of the country on a whim, without so much as a hint as to where you're going."

"You're right, Blair," he offered without remorse. "We did call you from Dubai. But don't worry. Next time I'll email you an itinerary." Blair was seething at Chuck's smug attitude and his obvious lie. There will be no next time, she thought to herself.

"So what exactly have you been up to? Or should I ask..whom?" she asked. Chuck turned around with a smirk.

"I'm sure I don't know what you mean," he answered, at first seemingly amused by the question. His eyes then narrowed on hers. "In the future, I would advise you to think long and hard before making such accusations. Especially if the one making the accusation already lives in a glass house. We have a son who would be extremely hurt to see his parents fighting."

Blair stumbled for a moment, wondering what exactly Chuck was referring to with his talk of glass houses. Could he possibly know...? She decided it was just Chuck being his usual asshole self.

"I'm well aware of how fragile our son is. Which is why the next time you take him out of the country without telling me, it will be your last. Got it?" Blair was stone cold as she stared directly into Chuck's eyes.

Chuck laughed. "You shouldn't make threats you can't make good on, Blair. You of all people should know that rule by heart. Now go say hello to your son." With that Chuck turned around and entered their bathroom, the sound of the water spraying off marble tile soon followed.

Blair stood there for a moment. She was sick of taking orders from Chuck, and tired of him calling all the shots with Henry. She exited her bedroom, and headed down the hall. The light was off as she quietly opened the door, tiptoeing nervously to his bed. He appeared to be sleeping as she carefully sat down beside him. She ran her hand through his hair for a moment and he began to stir.

"Mommy?" Henry asked, bleary eyed. He was fighting to keep his eyes open.

"Hi, baby! How was your trip?" Blair stretched her body out onto Henry's bed, resting her head on a nearby pillow. She captured him in her arms, squeezing him tightly.

"I'm exhausted, mommy." His use of the word "exhausted" made Blair smile.

"What did you do to get so exhausted, Henry?"

"Went to a lot of places. Like we went to Dubai. And then to Singa-lore." Blair laughed. "You mean Singapore?"

"Yeah," Henry said. "That's my favorite place. And then we went to a beach. And one time there was this really pretty lady there. She was the prettiest lady I ever saw in my whole life." Blair frowned. Unfortunately he was sounding like a mini Chuck.

She tried her best not to let her five year old offend her and chalked it up to his grogginess. "Oh, really?" she said a bit unevenly. That pretty, huh?"

"Yes," Henry confirmed. "She took me to the beach and then we went on a boat ride." He better have been wearing a life preserver, Blair thought to herself as she leaned in to give Henry a kiss on the cheek.

"And..um..what was this woman's name, Henry?" Blair didn't like using Henry for information on Chuck, but she had to know.

"Miss Eva." Blair thought for a moment before repeating the name. "Eva," she repeated. Eva...Coupeau?" Her blood was starting to boil again.

"And where was daddy while you were with Miss...Eva?" Blair gulped. It physically pained her to even say her name.

"Working at the hotel. He had a lot of meetings." Henry then squirmed for a moment, pushing himself out of his mother's arms. "You're making me hot, mommy," he whined. She reluctantly let him loose.

"So where was Corrinne when Daddy was at the hotel and you were at the beach with Eva?" He didn't immediately answer. She could tell Henry was far too tired, and that this conversation would soon be coming to an end.

"Henry?" Blair pressed, giving his head a little rub.

"She left," he replied. Blair sighed, a bit confused. "She left?" she asked, pressing him for confirmation. But that was it. He was out like a light.

She turned to place a kiss on Henry's forehead before getting out of the bed. As she closed the door to Henry's room, she was met in the hallway by Chuck, who was wearing only a bath towel around his waist, his hair still damp.

"How did the interrogation go?" Chuck asked smugly. "Did you get the information you wanted?"

Blair cocked her head to the side. "What information should I be looking for exactly, Chuck? The information that you've been seeing Eva Coupeau? Or that you were off fucking Henry's nanny while the other whore babysat my son?" Chuck's eyes narrowed.

"Jumping to conclusions now aren't we, Blair? There's an explanation. Eva lives in Phuket now and we ran into her at the hotel. She offered to show Henry around. He had a fantastic time. Leave it to you to think a five year old could possibly give you all the facts." Chuck stood before her, running a hand through his damp hair. She wanted to slap that arrogant look right off his face.

"So Eva works out of Phuket now? Well obviously there's plenty of business _there_ for a working girl. And where was the nanny during all of this?" Chuck's silence said it all and he couldn't look her in the eye.

"Well." Blair swallowed hard, trying to compose herself. The effort didn't last long, however.

"I would prefer that in the future, you don't let my son go on any more boat rides with prostitutes. In fact, no boat rides at all. Period. And no going near water. No lakes, no oceans, no rivers, no streams. There's just too many things that can go wrong."

"Blair-"

"No, Chuck. I'm talking, please." He rolled his eyes as he took his medicine, leaning against the wall as he waited to hear what else he could possibly be harangued for.

"I can deal with the fact that you are screwing around on me, but you will not bring Henry with you when you go off to do it. Do you understand? And that Colleen, or Corrinne, or whatever the hell her name is? The one with the big fake breasts who pretends to be a nanny? She's gone. Get rid of her or I will."

Chuck smirked. "Is that all, princess?" Blair wasn't sure, honestly. She'd been scorned and if she thought of something else she'd let him know without hesitation. "I'll let you know."

Chuck took a step towards her. "You sound a bit paranoid, Blair. I think you need to make a trip to see Dr. Sanders. An increase in Lexapro might be in order." Blair's eyes grew wide. Oh no, he was not insulting her. Not after the shit he had pulled.

He shrugged. "I'm not fucking Eva," he stated bluntly. "I hadn't even seen her since that day you lied about finding my passport in her bag. Running into her was..." He paused for a moment. "She's a good person, Blair. Someone Henry is lucky enough to have been exposed to, and from whom I'm lucky enough to have been given forgiveness. Especially considering how she was treated during her time in New York. She's kind, compassionate. Nothing like us. And she adores Henry." Of course he wasn't going to address the subject of Corrinne.

"Oh? Ok. Right. I guess I'm just the wicked witch of the West, then. How unfortunate for Henry to have a mother like me! But, you know, at least he's met Eva!" Blair quickly started to retreat down the hall toward her bedroom, shoving Chuck out of the way as he reached for her arm. She didn't want him to see her crying.

"Blair!" He yelled out, but she didn't respond. She just headed straight for her bedroom to take that nap she so desperately needed.

Chuck stood there for a moment. He was startled to see the doorknob to his son's room turn slightly and the door pulled open, a little brown head poking out.

"Daddy. Were you and mommy fighting?" Chuck walked over and patted his son on the head.

"No, no. We weren't fighting. Just having a little disagreement. That's what married people do." Henry nodded, before adding. "I miss Ms. Eva. Can we see her again soon?"

Chuck didn't respond, but he knew he had a problem.

"Go on and finish your nap. I'll wake you up for dinner."

With that, Chuck knew he had to make some changes and he had to make them immediately. He had fallen off in the past few years and he could now see the toll it was taking on Blair...and now his son. He wasn't a good person. He knew that. He was a liar. He had indeed slept with Eva and he had been cheating on Blair for a while with Corrinne. And there were dozens more. He had started sleeping around at the time Henry was born. And he had no real explanation for it. He was the troubled "Chuck Bass." He wasn't trying to hurt Blair on purpose. But she knew what she was getting.

It had taken one look from his son to compel him, though. He had to make an new effort for his son's sake, and this time he had to make it stick. He needed to win Blair's trust back. Chuck was ready to fight for his family, he decided.

But then again, he had said that before.

* * *

Dan strolled through Chelsea Market. He hadn't answered Serena's calls or texts. All he could think about was how Blair had hastily dismissed him after a frenzied, impromptu fuck session against the wall in her office. It had been two hours since their encounter. Dan would have _a lot _of explaining to do to Serena when he returned to the apartment, but now...now he just needed to decompress.

He grabbed a coffee and a blueberry muffin from Amy's Bread. He was absolutely starving. Dan took a seat on a bench, as he people watched. He quickly devoured his muffin, then leaned back, sipping on his coffee. It was especially strong, for which he was grateful. He certainly needed it. Dan finally started to relax a bit, watching the crowd pass before his eyes. He so desperately wanted someone to confide in, someone he could talk to about Blair without being judged. Someone he could confide in that his marriage had been a complete and colossal mistake. He just wanted someone to tell him they understood what he was going through. His dad wasn't an option. He knew Rufus would immediately disapprove. Jenny might possibly understand, considering she now worked for Blair.

"Dan Humphrey." A familiar but jolly voice rang out. It jolted him straight up and he instantly spilled coffee down the front of his shirt. "Whoa, sorry man. Didn't mean to rattle you." Nate Archibald looked down at him and laughed.

"Nate." Dan reached his hand out to shake his hand. Maybe Nate could be a trusted confidante...

Nate stood before him in a business suit, looking dapper as ever. It had been a while since he had seen Nate. They're busy schedules kept them going in very opposite directions.

"Kind of far from the Upper East Side, aren't you?" Nate joked. "Did you take a wrong turn?"

"Oh, are you joking? I come down here all the time," Dan explained. It wasn't a lie. "Makes me feel closer to Brooklyn, you know?" Okay that _was_ a lie. Dan could practically hear Nate's brain churning, trying to figure out where Brooklyn actually was in correlation to where they were currently.

"And what about you? What brings you down to Hell's Kitchen?" Dan asked as Nate made himself at home on the bench next to him.

"Advertising meeting. Just grabbing a quick bite." Nate had an odd expression on his face, and he seemed to be studying Dan's attire. It made Dan a little self conscious, knowing the coffee stain on his shirt made him look like a complete slob.

"Working on a Saturday. That's dedication my friend," Dan replied, deciding he was just being paranoid. Nate laughed at Dan's use of the word dedication to describe him.

It was true. If his high school self could see him now, he wouldn't believe it. He was a media mogul now, wearing suits, and even doing business on the weekends. High school Nate would be waking and baking right about now.

"So what about you, man? You're looking a little..rough. Did you get into a fight or something?" Dan looked down at his shirt. He hadn't noticed before, but there were a couple of buttons missing, and a rip near his collar.

Blair. Blair had ripped his damn shirt. Shit.

"Oh..." Dan had to come up with a story, and quick. God, lying was hard.

"The shirt...? Oh you mean the rip? In the shirt. Well...this lady, this lady was crossing the street, right out here on 9th ave, and then this...cab...whizzed by. Almost ran her over. She started to step back and she kind of lost her balance. She was wearing these really tall heels..probably Marc Jacobs..or..I don't know. Anyway, she kind of fell backwards." Dan pantomimed a backwards motion with his hand. "And I was standing on the corner next her and she suddenly reached her hand out. Grabbed my shirt. And you know...just..rip." Dan made a face, then took a sip of coffee, afraid to look up to see Nate's reaction.

He then realized that story sounded...familiar. Very familiar. Fuck.

He once saved a wasted Serena from getting hit by a taxi. Hopefully, Nate had never heard the story. And hopefully, this story wouldn't get back to Serena. Shit. There were so many things to consider.

Nate was obviously confused. But he didn't press the issue. "Well that's story does indeed sound very "Humphrey-esque." He checked his watch. "Hey, listen. I'm having a Christmas party next Friday. I'd love it if you and Serena could come."

"A party? Ok. Sure, yeah. That sounds...that sounds good. I'll check with Serena."

"Seven o'clock."

"Your apartment, I presume?" Dan asked as Nate started to walk off.

"Oh wait, no. Sorry. It's going to be at my new estate out on Long Island. Just got done renovating it and it's going to be all decked out with decorations. There's gonna be a Santa for the kids. I'm sparing no expense!"

"Oh, ok." Dan nodded. Great. A Christmas party with Serena sounded just peachy. And maybe if he was lucky Chuck would make an appearance as well.

"Sorry, man. I gotta run now, but we'll catch up then. I'll email you directions." He gave Dan a quick pat on the shoulder. "Oh, and stop saving damsels in distress, will you? You don't want Serena getting jealous."

"Yeah. I sure don't..want that." Dan could breathe again as he watched Nate disappear out the door. He looked down at his shirt, then stood up and threw his coffee cup in the bin next to him.

Next stop..to go buy a new shirt. Or shirts.

* * *

"I can't believe you just had a sudden urge to shop!" Serena said between bites of her Salmon at Jean-Georges. She was admiring Dan's new Armani suit, one of many new items he picked up for himself during a spontaneous but very necessary shopping spree.

"Yeah, well. I wasn't getting any writing done. I couldn't sleep. I thought to myself, why not just..go and spend an exorbitant amount of money on clothes?"

Serena smiled. "I only wish I could have been there to see you in action. You know how I love to shop for men." Dan briefly wondered just how many men Serena had shopped for in her lifetime, then realized it might take him a while to calculate. He decided it wasn't worth the brain power to try and figure it out.

"Yeah..you know when the urge strikes." _Or when Blair comes a calling and clothes get ripped. _

"So, uh, what was your fight with Blair about?" Dan was hoping to get a little more information on how Serena knew Chuck was cheating on Blair, or if maybe she had just said it to be hurtful.

"You know. The usual. I go to talk and somehow she finds a way to insult me."

Dan raised his eyebrows. Sometimes_ you deserve it._

"Anyway, I don't want to talk about Blair. This night is about us." Serena smiled. She then pushed her plate away and took a sip of wine.

"So," she started. Dan suddenly had a sick feeling in his stomach at the change of tone in Serena's voice.

"Oh! I forgot to tell you!" Dan suddenly blurted out. Serena was startled by the interruption. "You'll never guess who I saw! Nate. He invited us to a Christmas party at his new estate next Friday!" Dan then took a bite of his tenderloin, chewing awkwardly.

"Oh really?" Serena answered, slightly confused by his exuberance. "Okay! I guess I have a reason to shop now, too!"

"Yeah, so..." Dan was nervously racking his brain, searching for more topics, but nothing sprang to mind. He knew Serena was about to unleash whatever news she had been wanting to share on him. His focused on his meat as he braced himself for Serena's impending announcement.

"It will be good to see Nate," Serena admitted. "Anyway, the reason I wanted this to be a special night..."

Oh, Jesus, Dan thought to himself. Stop being so melodramatic. Just spit it out and get it over with. And please don't say you're pregnant. He grabbed his wine glass and took a big gulp.

"I want to have a baby." Dan immediately spit his Chateau Bonnet all over his beef tenderloin. He continued to choke a bit, thumping on his chest as he tried to clear his windpipe. At first he heard, "I'm having a baby." But then he realized it was, "I want to have a baby." Oh thank you sweet baby Jesus.

"Dan are you all right?" He nodded at Serena and gave her a thumbs up as he reached for a glass of water. She looked slightly concerned and she handed him a napkin.

"Well did you hear what I said?" Serena was gazing at him intently. "What do you think?"

"Yeah, I uh...Hmmm. Wow. Something to think about. You want to have a baby, huh? Ok..."

Serena frowned with Dan's less than thrilled reaction to her announcement. It obviously wasn't the reaction she thought she'd get. "Well don't sound too excited, okay?" She grabbed her fork and started stabbing at her salmon, taking in a mouthful. Dan leaned forward.

"Serena you caught me off guard, that's all. You're springing this on me at Jean-Georges. Forgive me if I'm a little surprised. That's all." He took another sip of water.

"Springing this on you? Dan, it's the natural evolution of a marriage. We've been married for a year." She was making it sound like having a baby was like getting a new accessory, like a new Chanel handbag. Just throw in a baby to complete the ensemble.

"It's just, babies..you know they're a big responsibility." Dan knew this firsthand from his time spent with Milo. "Are you sure you're ready for that?"

Serena cocked her head back. "Not just me, Dan. Us. And yes I think we're ready. And why does everyone keep telling me that!? As if I lack the 'responsibility' gene?" It suddenly hit Dan that Blair must have told her the same thing. "I understand that babies are a lot of work, Dan. And if we need to, we can get a nanny like Chuck and Blair-"

"A nanny? Why would we need a nanny?" At least Chuck and Blair _both_ had jobs to warrant having a nanny. Serena hesitated for a moment.

Of course one didn't need a reason to have a nanny if the child was born on the Upper East Side.

"I don't know, Dan. I guess I'm just trying to make a point that there's nothing holding us back. Plus you love kids."

All Dan wanted was to get some fresh air. He wanted to run as far away as he could from this conversation. They sat in awkward silence for a minute, before Dan finally spoke up.

"I think..I would like some time to _think_ on this." He looked up to make eye contact with Serena. She was obviously not pleased with his answer. "After Milo...that whole experience..I just need some time. To think."

"Well, then. I'll just give you time to_ think,_" she mocked.

Serena was visibly upset, but she wasn't going to argue. She finished her salmon in silence, as Dan ordered another bottle of wine.

The rest of the evening was relatively uneventful.

There wasn't much left to say.

* * *

"Blair."

Blair turned over in bed to find Chuck leaning over her. She was slightly disoriented. The curtains were pulled open and she squinted, finding herself staring directly into the sunlight. She rolled back over and pulled her phone off the nightstand to check the time. 9:30.

She'd been asleep since yesterday afternoon.

"Blair. Come on." Blair looked down. At some point she had changed into a night gown-or someone had changed her into it."

"Henry made breakfast for you. With a little help from Dorota, of course." Chuck was still hunched over her, and it was obvious he wasn't going to leave until she got up. She was suspicious as to why he was being so nice to her, but she took the hand he offered to help her up as she reached for her robe.

"I'll meet you downstairs," he said politely, giving her time to make herself presentable. She nodded, then turned to look at herself in the mirror. She had bags under her eyes, which were only magnified by crusted up bits of mascara. Blair went into the bathroom to wash her face, then slathered it in moisturizer. She then grabbed a bottle of water she kept next to the sink and chugged it down. She always kept a bottle of water there as reminder to keep herself hydrated. A hydrated woman always looked better than a dehydrated one, and even if Blair's personal life was currently spinning out of control, she was determined to still look good. She was still the face of Waldorf Designs. At least for now.

Blair made her way down the back staircase and was instantly greeted by the smells of pancakes and bacon. It smelled incredible, mostly because she was starving. She hadn't eaten since that stale croissant Serena had left her with yesterday morning.

"Mommy! Look what I made for you!" Henry proudly displayed a plate of pancakes with chocolate chips for eyes and a whipped cream mouth.

"Well, that looks scrumptious!" Blair sat down next to her son, on the opposite side of Chuck. He read the paper while Dorota set a mug of coffee before her.

"Here, Miss Blair. You need," she said curtly. Blair glared at Dorota, then forced a smile. "Thank you, Dorota. Didn't I tell you to take off today?" Blair reached for the cream and added a smidge to her coffee.

"Mister Chuck say come today so I come! Dorota can't keep up with the coming and the going and the he say and then she say..."

"Blair, I asked her to come over today so we could have some...space later." Blair was sure she knew what Chuck meant by "space." She rolled her eyes.

"That's right. Mister Henry and I, we go to duck pond later." Blair raised an eyebrow but didn't argue as she shoved a forkful of pancakes into her mouth and suddenly giggled, remembering something. _Sometimes you gotta throw away the first pancake._

"What's funny, Mommy?" Henry was looking at her with interest. Chuck was as well, now. "Um, well, what's funny is that I didn't realize you were such a good cook! These are delicious pancakes. But I think I need more syrup." She continued to eat, but couldn't seem to wipe the smile off of her face. Chuck continued to read his paper, but looked up every so often at the sound of Blair's inappropriate giggling. Henry was giggling now as well as he fed his mom a slice of bacon.

And that's how they spent the rest of their morning-giggling like idiots with a confused Chuck watching from behind his paper, and an even more confused Dorota peeking out from behind the doorway.

After breakfast, Blair got dressed and Dorota took Henry to Central Park-as promised. Chuck was dressed in casual attire as he waited for Blair downstairs. He smiled as she entered the room, even standing up at her presence.

"You seem to be feeling better," he noted.

"No thanks to you," she retorted icily. Blair had a seat on the couch.

"I deserve that," Chuck answered calmly before taking a seat next to her. He was sitting a little too close for Blair's liking considering what he'd put her through recently.

"What does your week look like?" he asked, casually. Blair shrugged. She wasn't sure. She knew what she needed to be doing-traveling to Paris and making time to meet with Eleanor. She just wasn't up for it.

"What if...we go away somewhere. Somewhere sunny. Tropical." Blair could feel Chuck breathing against her neck and it was stirring up feelings again. He slowly leaned in to kiss her there, working downwards to her shoulder blade. Before she knew what was happening, he had his hands on her blouse and his fingers were working on unbuttoning the first few buttons.

That's when it hit her. If he thought she was going to jump in the sack with him after what he'd been up to he had another thing coming.

She reached up and smacked his hand away before he went any further, then stood up.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I thought..." Chuck stood up and walked over to close the gap that stood between him and Blair. He then caressed her chin. "That I was going to make love to my wife." Blair slapped his hand away again.

"You know, Chuck? You've got some nerve coming back here and expecting me to just fall at your feet when you've slept with everyone on this island, and now apparently the continents of Europe and Asia. No. No. I don't think so."

"Blair, come on. You're making a big deal out of this. And I know you have needs. Needs that haven't been met in a while. Let me help you out." He once again leaned in to attempt a kiss but she stepped away.

She was the one smirking now. "You're right about one thing, Chuck. I do have needs. And I can assure you my needs are currently being satisfied." Her eyes lit up with satisfaction as she delivered him a crushing blow. All Chuck could do was stare in disbelief, his mouth agape. He had just been messing with her before when he had accused her of sleeping with someone else.

"Oh really?" Chuck questioned her, still not sure whether or not to believe her. Her words had obviously hit him where she had intended.

"Really," she retorted, reaching for her coat. "Now, if you don't mind, I think I'm going to meet my son at the duck pond." She turned around and headed for the door, leaving Chuck in stunned silence. When she was gone, he made a call.

"Rich. Yeah. I need a tail put on my wife. Starting today."

* * *

Blair stepped out on the street, the cold air hitting her immediately. God it had felt good to tell Chuck off and tell him her sexual needs were indeed being taken care of, but it was a stupid thing to do. She had to tell Dan. Blair immediately grabbed her phone and dialed Dan's number.

Dan and Serena were sitting at the kitchen table, having a late breakfast. His phone was on silent but he saw it ringing before Serena noticed.

"Hey, it's Alessandra." Dan lied, referring to his old book agent. "Wonder what she wants?" Serena gave a simple, couldn't care less shrug as she alternated between texting and reading Page Six on her phone. She was obviously still peeved over their dinner last night.

And the fact that Dan didn't "feel up to" having sex last night.

He got up and quickly headed to the balcony and was able to answer just in the nick of time.

"Dan." Blair's voice was cool. "Is she there?"

"Yeah, she's here, but it's fine. I'm outside on the balcony. What's up? Are you okay?" Dan fumbled with his phone as he switched ears.

"Yes and no." That sounded ominous.

"Well what is it?"

"Chuck and Henry came back last night."

"Oh." Dan wasn't really sure if she thought that was a good thing or a bad thing.

"Okay," he continued, trying to sound encouraging. "Well your son's home. That's good, right?"

"Right."

"So what-?"

"I may have told Chuck that I'm seeing someone." She said it quickly, hoping it wouldn't sound as bad as it obviously was.

"You. You what?"

"It wasn't on purpose, but I just-"

"He doesn't know it's me, though, does he?" Dan didn't know why but he was suddenly sweating. It wasn't that he was afraid of Chuck. It's just the idea of crossing the threshold that could send both of their marriages spiraling out seemed like it would be eons away. Their affair really only started three days ago.

"No. He doesn't know it's you. But I'm sure now he's going to have me followed. At least for a while." Blair's voice was soft, and Dan wished he were standing there next to her so he could hug her fears away.

"Okay, okay," Dan said, trying to stay positive. "Listen just don't worry about it. I'm sure it will blow over quickly. We'll just have to-"

"Keep our distance," Blair said, finishing his sentence. It wouldn't be easy, but it was necessary.

"Right." There was silence for a moment, before Blair finally spoke again. "Well I'm at the park now. I'm meeting Henry and Dorota but..."

"Yeah?" Dan didn't want the call to end.

"I love you. You know that, right?" Blair said, smiling into the phone.

He could laugh about it now, but the last time he had heard those words spoken, he was the one speaking them. And she had broken his heart.

"You do?" Dan teased.

"Yep."

"You know what?" Dan asked her.

"What?"

"I love you, too. Even when you're mean and rip my shirt."

Blair laughed. "Sorry about that." There was another pause and he heard her sigh into the phone. "I've got to go, Humphrey."

"Ok." He waited for her to hang up first before turning around and opening the sliding door to go back inside. Serena was still sitting there, same position as before.

She didn't ask about his phone call. She didn't seem to care. She was too busy being mad at him.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Thanks for reading my adventures of Dan and Blair, the best couple ever on a show that didn't deserve them. I'm really not sure how I want this to end, but as long as I'm inspired, I'll keep writing. I definitely want this story to have an organic ending-something the tv show could never figure out how to accomplish. Anyway, not sure if I'll be able to keep the updates coming weekly as I have been, but I shall do my best. Warning: This chapter got extremely smutty at the end. So don't read if that's not your thing. Otherwise, enjoy:)xoxo**

Chapter Six

"Blair!" Blair pushed the phone away from her ear, the volume a little painful for the groggy state she was currently in. It was four in the morning. She had been sleeping so well, too, and was right in the middle of a pretty damn good dream involving a Brooklyn born wizard and his magic "wand." She had just gotten to the part where he had magically made her clothes disappear.

Thanks Unisom.

But the sleep aid hadn't been enough to keep the light from her phone from waking her-it had been on silent-and rather than pushing the "ignore" button she answered it instead. The unmistakable sound of Eleanor Waldorf-Rose came squawking out. Blair kept promising herself she wouldn't sleep with the phone by her night stand, but she just couldn't let the practice go-not since her recent issues with Chuck and being out of contact with her son for over a week.

"Mother, you do know that it's four in the morning here," she whispered, trying to dramatize to Eleanor the fact that people are normally asleep at this time.

"And apparently it's the only time you'll answer the phone!" Eleanor screamed. Blair once again cringed at the sound of her mother's voice coming from the other end. She peeked down to see Chuck snoring away beside her. Somehow his arm had made its way over to her side of the bed and draped itself around her waist. Blair had gone to bed fairly early to avoid any potential _unfortunate_ interaction with him such as this one. She had taken what she thought were all the proper precautions, but he still wasn't taking the hints. She had point blank told Chuck to sleep in the guest room! Yet here he still was. Asshole.

"Just hold on, Mother..let me get downstairs," Blair said wearily, as she mentally started to prepare herself for a verbal lashing.

She rolled her eyes as she directed her attention to Chuck, roughly shoving his arm aside. She pulled down the covers as her legs delicately eased their way to the ground, her feet finding a pair of Sperry slippers that were laying nearby. She grabbed her robe on her way out of the bedroom, looking behind her as she gave the door a good loud slam. He didn't deserve to sleep peacefully.

Blair slowly made the journey downstairs, feeling for light switches and fumbling with her phone along the way. Somehow, she finally made her way into the dining room. A sigh of annoyance from the other end of the line alerted her to the fact that Eleanor was indeed still there and growing increasingly impatient. "Blair, what is going on with you!?" her mother demanded. Blair sunk into a chair at the dining room table, preparing herself for the full on assault that was about to be unleashed upon her. "Your failure to communicate with me, with..with anyone, is unacceptable! Leaving Jenny Humphrey to run my company here in Paris-she is by no means qualified to make key business decisions. And have you even looked at the latest figures? Orders are down six percent from last year for the spring. I need to know what you're going to do about it!" Blair inhaled, a maneuver she often relied on to inject herself with a shot of confidence, before giving her an answer.

"Already ahead of you, Mother. I have meetings set up everyday this week here in New York. I will charm the buyers as I always do."

"Blair, do you think I'm stupid? You think I'm going to let you hide out in New York while sales for my company, a company I built from the ground up, continue to plummet?" Blair was obviously off her game, because she had not reply whatsoever.

"There is only one way to address this mess. And it must be addressed sooner rather than later. We need to go back to the drawing board. If the designs aren't selling, then we need new designs! I need you to get back to Paris tout de suite so we can discuss this in person."

"Fashion week is long over, Mother. No one is going to want to see-"

"There is no choice, Blair." She could practically see her mother tearing her hair out in frustration through the phone as she paced behind a desk. Eleanor had begged Blair to take over her company. Looking back on it, Blair wasn't exactly sure what she was thinking. She was by no means qualified to run such a corporation at the time Eleanor handed it off to her. She hadn't even finished college. Eleanor had hoped for the best, but luckily, she figured out fairly quickly that Blair wasn't up to it. However, she was still determined to make her daughter a success because she didn't want anyone second guessing her decision. Failure wouldn't be an option for her or her daughter. So while Blair was now the face of the company, Eleanor was the woman behind the curtain, poking and prodding and keeping Blair in line. Blair was okay with this arrangement. Once she realized that Eleanor would still have her finger in the day to day operations, it took a lot of the pressure off of her. Well, the public pressure, anyways. Eleanor was on her back all the time.

"Mother, Henry and Chuck just got back two days ago. Christmas is next week! And as I have already told you I have meetings scheduled here. I can't just up and leave town right now."

"I don't care how many meetings you have scheduled, Blair! Cancel them! It doesn't matter how many meetings you set up if the clothes aren't up to par. We need a new product. And I hate to say it, Blair, but we may just..." She heard her mother take a deep, calculated breath.

"What, Mother?"

"We may just need a new designer." If Blair had been asleep before, she was certainly awake now.

"Blair, I'll expect to see you here in the morning." Before Blair could get in another word, the call ended.

She stood up from her chair, taking a moment to slump against the wall as she pondered the conversation. The implication of what her mother was saying-getting a new designer-gave her a pang of anxiety. Jenny, Dan's sister...she wouldn't be able to fire her. There was no way. It wasn't so much a fondness for Jenny as much as she just didn't want to upset Dan.

She walked into the living room and over to the couch, diving head first into it. Fine. She would go to Paris, she decided. She could make a quick trip there to please her mother. She would take Henry with her, obviously, so they could have some mother and son bonding time. It could be a good thing she decided. And she could convince her mother that Waldorf Designs was going through the same thing other labels were going through and that Jenny wasn't the issue. Blair grabbed a pillow and fluffed it up under her head.

But first things first. A couple more hours of sleep would be necessary. And a few more magical dreams.

* * *

Dan leaned over Serena as she slept. She was out cold, and didn't seem to be close to waking any time soon. He grabbed a piece of paper and quickly scribbled a message on it.

_Gone to write. Figured a change of scenery would be in order. Call you later. Love, Dan._

Dan slipped the note onto the pillow next to Serena's head so she couldn't possibly miss it. It was almost seven, and she probably wouldn't be up for another couple of hours. Dan had to get some work done, and with Blair currently off limits, he figured this would be an optimum time to work on his book and get his next set of chapters off to his editor.

He quickly made his way down to the lobby, computer bag in hand, hoping to make a quick escape. Like most mornings, Vanya was working the early shift at the building's main entrance.

"Good morning, Vanya." Dan tried to break the morning in with a smile and a friendly wave to the door man who had been acting a little strangely toward him lately. Vanya nodded back with a cryptic eye, and Dan immediately felt uneasy. As Dan started to walk past him, something pulled him back. He wasn't sure why it was so important to him, but he had to know why Vanya was suddenly being so distant...even if he already had a pretty good idea.

He braced himself, then turned to face the normally jovial door man. "Is..is everything okay, Vanya?"

"Everything is fine Mr. Humphrey." Vanya pursed his lips as he zeroed in on Dan's face, studying it. Almost like he was making mental notes of the conversation. "Should it not be?" It was definitely a loaded question and Dan gulped. He should have just kept walking.

"You just seem to be a little standoffish lately. Did I..did I say something to offend you?" Vanya looked down for a moment, and took a step towards Dan.

"I know it's not my place, but I've seen you take service entrance many times lately. When men take service entrance in this building..." Dan's heart started to race. His suspicions about Vanya were confirmed.

"It usually means only one thing," Vanya continued.

"Um..ok." Dan thought the best thing to do would be to play dumb. "What does taking the service entrance mean exactly?" He was having trouble looking Vanya in the eye, though, which he knew was a key giveaway when someone was lying.

Dan, just shut it, he told himself. Get outta there! Abort, abort! Stop talking!

"It usually mean things not exactly kosher at home. They think that no one can see them go in and out. But eyes..they are everywhere." That sounded ominous. Dan's face fell. Vanya was totally suspecting him of cheating on Serena. "I know Miss Serena a long time-"

"Vanya," Dan suddenly interrupted. "That's kind of a grand assumption to make, don't you think? Personally, I sometimes just like to avoid the pomposity of the whole door man thing. Open my own door. Makes me feel manly!" Dan forced himself to laugh at his own joke in attempt to lighten the mood. "It's no big deal really."

Vanya shrugged. "I'm sorry for even saying anything. It's really not my business, Mr. Humphrey. Please just pretend I say nothing," Vanya replied through a suspicious gaze. Dan knew Vanya would never say anything anyway, but for some reason he felt it was important to convince him that nothing was going on.

"Vanya, you know I would never intentionally do anything to hurt Serena." He could have found a more convincing way to put it. That had come out more like an appeal.

"Yes. I know, Mr. Humphrey. But sometimes we don't think clearly. Especially when..." He gave a nod downwards, and Dan plainly understood he was referring to his _manly_ parts. When the urge calls...

Dan gave a pained smile. "That's true...but I can assure you that my... I'm actually thinking quite clearly. I've got one of the clearest thinkers around. In fact, it understands what's going on at all times, you know what I mean...?" The word soup spilling from Dan's mouth was overflowing, and it had quickly segued into one of the most uncomfortable conversations he'd ever participated in. And he was Dan Humphrey-uncomfortable conversations were kind of his thing.

Dan wondered if Vanya was as confused as he was as they continued to speak in subtext.

"When I think of Dorota, I think I can never do anything to ever hurt her." He was earnest, making two fists in the air to emphasize his point.

"Well you and Dorota _are_ pretty perfect for each other," Dan agreed. "Without question." Vanya nodded his appreciation at the compliment, and the two men eyed each other for a moment. Dan honestly was unsure of where to go from here. He hadn't really admitted to anything, but he hadn't denied it either. But he couldn't let Vanya go on thinking he was cheating on Serena. Dan was suddenly overcome with a surge of confidence. He was going to put Vanya's suspicions to rest once and for all.

"Vanya, I can assure you that I am not seeing anyone. I just like to use the service entrance. I was born in Brooklyn. And even after all of these years...sometimes I just want to get in and out quickly. No conversations. You understand?" He was firm and confident in his explanation. And it seemed pretty plausible.

Vanya almost looked convinced as Dan waited patiently for a reaction. It was like a Mexican standoff. "Yes, Mr. Humphrey. I believe you." He almost seemed apologetic. "I'm married to Dorota, remember? Her suspicious nature has rubbed off on me, I guess."

Dan patted Vanya on the shoulder. "Of course. Well I'm glad we had this talk, Vanya. We should, uh, we should go get a drink sometime." Dan thought that was a nice touch if he did say so himself. Bribing the Russian with the promise of alcohol.

"Sure, why not?" Vanya nodded, impressed with the idea.

"All right then, man. I'll catch you later!" He quickly high tailed it out of there, peeking over his shoulder once more to see Vanya giving him an enthusiastic wave. He had handled that well, he thought. Once he made it onto the street, Dan exhaled with a sense of accomplishment.

What Dan had failed to consider, however, was Dorota. If Vanya happened to ever divulge any of this conversation to her, it just might send her Spidey senses into overdrive.

* * *

"Nooooooo! I don't want to go!" Henry screamed at Blair. "You can't make me! I'm going to tell my Dad!" Blair was frazzled as she stuffed clothes for him into a suitcase. Henry kicked one of his Skylander action figures against the wall. He then threw himself on the floor, screaming and crying. She wondered if he was ever going to outgrow these tantrums. It wasn't like he was two! They just seemed to be getting worse and worse.

"But you will get to see Grandma Eleanor. And Grandpa Cyrus. Oh and probably Grandpa Harold, too! And Roman!" Blair forced herself to be excited.

She watched in disbelief as Henry suddenly stopped crying, thinking perhaps she had gotten through to him. He then proceeded to get up and walk over to the suitcase. He started pulling the clothes out that Blair had already packed, throwing them onto the floor.

And this is what you get when you have a child with the devil, she thought to herself. Devil's spawn.

Blair calmly sat on the bed. She could only watch in horror as her bratty son continued to grab every article of clothing out of the suitcase. She placed her hands on her forehead, trying to stave off a migraine. _Do not lose your temper, Blair. It will only make Chuck look like the good guy._

And speak of the devil. Chuck suddenly slithered up, leaning in the doorway with his hands in his pockets, a neutral look on his face. Blair imagined he'd probably been listening from around the corner and enjoying her struggles.

He took in the scene, his eyes slowly scanning from the suitcase to the clothes on the floor and then to his son's now disheveled appearance. "Taking a trip?" he asked Blair, cooly.

"Can't get anything past you," Blair replied sardonically.

"So where exactly are we going?"

"I have to go to Paris. So can you please help me here?" She wasn't going to beg him. However he had created this little monster.

Chuck nodded. "Henry, I'm going to need you to pick up these clothes and put them in the suitcase. Your mother would like you to accompany her to Paris."

"No!" Henry replied, and Chuck flinched at his son's rebellion. No son of his would speak to him in such a manner. "I don't want to go! I want to stay here with you!" Blair was growing increasingly agitated. She couldn't hide the look of disgust on her face, a look that didn't escape Chuck.

"Henry," Chuck said behind gritted teeth. "I'm going to give you to the count of three to pick up these clothes and put them back in the suitcase." Henry sat on the floor, his arms crossed in rebellion.

"One...two...three..." Chuck face was now bright red. "Henry!" He walked over to where his son was sitting and started to bend over. He grabbed for Henry's arm but Henry tried to slap it away. This only made Chuck angrier.

"Henry! Get up-

"Stop! Just stop!" Blair suddenly announced as she jumped off of the bed."You know what? Just let him stay here with you. It's fine. I'll be working so this is probably for the best." Yes, she had just given in far too easily. Blair knew it wasn't the best message to send to Henry, or to Chuck for that matter, but she couldn't possibly deal with a ill mannered child _and_ her mother both on one trip. At least they had spent a couple of drama free days together before the tantrums had returned. He could now go back to preferring his father. She stood up and looked from Henry to Chuck, before heading out the door.

"Blair-" Chuck started to chase after her.

"What!? This is what you wanted right? Congratulations! You've officially turned him against me. So now you can deal with him!" Chuck sighed. "But I have to go to Hong Kong at the end of the week. I'm talking to potential investors there so...it's probably best if he goes with you this time. I'll go talk to him again-"

"Oh no...no, no, no Chuck. You can't just take him with you when the mood strikes and leave me to deal with him when you don't want him around. No. Absolutely not." Blair realized she was probably talking loudly enough for Henry to hear her. Maybe that was the point.

"Blair, you made me get rid of the nanny remember? I'm going to have very little time to-"

Blair shrugged. She couldn't care less. "_You_ make other arrangements for him, then." Blair's car was coming in the next twenty minutes and she still hadn't started packing. She quickly turned on her heel and walked off, leaving Chuck stunned. She was furious. How could he not realize that he was responsible for the little monster in that room? He had spoiled him, given him anything that he wanted, never realizing it made Blair seem like the second string parent.

The chauffeur soon arrived and he came up to grab Blair's bags. She walked in to Henry's room and gave him a quick kiss on the head. He didn't acknowledge her. He was too busy playing a video game. She walked right past Chuck, who was seated on the couch, on her way out. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw that he was about to say something, but before giving him the opportunity, she quickly opened the door and slammed it behind her. On the way to the airport, she pulled out her phone.

_"Off to Paris. Not by choice. I miss you."_

At this point she didn't care. She didn't care if Chuck was checking her phone records. Or if Serena was around when she called or texted him. It couldn't get any worse, she decided.

_"Oh, really? When are you coming back?"_

She quickly replied.

_"No idea. Eleanor's on my case. Charles Bass can go to hell. And I'm the mother of Chucky."_

Dan burst out laughing. He was sitting in a coffee shop in Williamsburg. Henry, aka, Chuck, Jr. did seem to share a resemblance to the antagonist in "Child's Play." He would never tell Blair that, but apparently she already knew.

_"Let me know when you arrive._ _I worry."_

Blair smiled. Finally she had something to smile about today.

_"I love you."_

_"Love you, too."_

As Blair took her seat in first class, she was overcome with a sudden feeling of calm. Everything was okay. It would all work out. Because Dan Humphrey loved her.

* * *

After three long, excruciating days locked up in the Paris atelier, the moment of truth had finally arrived.

"So what do you think, Mother?" Blair bit her lip nervously with anticipation.

Eleanor bobbed her head up and down with approval as she thumbed through the new sketches.

"These...these could work. Finally! I think we have something here."

From the moment Blair had touched down in Paris, she and Jenny had gotten to work on creating a whole new line for Spring. Yes, it was late in the game. Yes, it was probably all for nothing. But Eleanor was adamant.

Sleep had been completely out of the question as Blair and Jenny toiled day and night. And it looked like Jenny was in the clear as far as her job was concerned.

Eleanor continued to examine the sketches. "We now have something original to show the buyers-something that feels completely different than what every other fashion house is doing. We need to start creating buzz for these immediately. The shows may be over, but we can still roll these out. Jenny, you will need to start getting samples together. Blair, you need to setup meetings in New York. I'll handle the meetings here and in Milan."

Jenny laughed as she caught Blair rolling her eyes behind Eleanor's back. She _had_ meetings setup already, until her mother had forced her to cancel them. At any rate, at least her mother had been pacified, for now. At that moment, Jean-Paul, Eleanor's assistant, walked in to let her know she had a phone call, leaving Blair and Jenny alone. The pressure finally off, Jenny looked at Blair curiously.

"So what's going on with you Blair?" Blair gave her a confused look.

"What do you mean?" she replied, innocently.

"I mean, you're really not acting like yourself. That eye roll was the first Blair like thing I've seen you do since you got here. For starters, you've been way too nice. Which is weird, because usually when Eleanor gets on you, you take it out on me." Jenny took a sip of her latte. They weren't necessarily close, but game recognized game, and their mutual respect had grown over the years. At least enough for Jenny to acknowledge when Blair was acting out of character. "Plus you're not arguing with Eleanor. At all. So what's the deal?"

Blair smiled. "Maybe I'm just trying something new. Finding my center. Drinking my green leafy juices." Dorota didn't buy it then. Jenny wasn't buying now.

"And um, how's Chuck?"

Blair did not now, nor did she ever, want to talk about Chuck with Jenny Humphrey. Not after the "incident."

"Chuck's great," she responded, simply. "In Hong Kong right now. Meeting with new hotel investors."

"And Henry?" Blair now couldn't help but glare.

"I see." Jenny leaned her head onto her hand, studying Blair's face and making her uncomfortable in the process." Blair started to fidget and turned away. Her body language was definitely betraying her.

"So if I'm reading you correctly, and I think that I _am_, things at home suck. Yet you are surprisingly okay about it. Or at least you have been until I started questioning you." Jenny smiled. "Blair, are you having an affair?" Blair's mouth opened wide, a look of shock on her face as she turned to look at Jenny, a guilty look on her face. Jenny had actually said it to tease Blair, but the look on her face said it all. Jenny's mouth fell open in amazement.

"Ho-lee crap. Blair..."

"You are so off base here, little J." She was hardly convincing.

"Blair, I've known you long enough to know that Chuck drives you crazy. He makes you crazy. You've always been a lot more relaxed when you're not having to jump through hoops to prove your love for him. It's obvious you've stopped putting him first. You're a lot less neurotic. Personally, I think it's great."

"So all of that equates to my having an affair? Really little J, you did always have quite the imagination. I remember when you thought that gay guy was in love with you." Jenny snarled at the reminder.

"But I admit you are right about one thing. I am putting myself first these days. There's no crime in that."

Jenny scooted her chair a tad closer. Blair grew uncomfortable with the proximity. "True. But I do think there's more to it than that. I missed the whole ordeal with you dating Dan, but everyone says you were a nicer person with him. Happier. Not sure if it was true-just what I heard. I still can't believe Dan went there with you." She started to laugh uncontrollably as she attempted to take another sip of her latte. Blair was instantly offended.

"What exactly do you mean?"

"Oh." Jenny realized her faux pas. "Just that..I um. It's just so weird to think about you two together."

"Well we do..did..have a lot in common. We like the same movies, the same artists, literature... I mean, on paper we definitely made a lot of sense. More sense than him and Serena." She scoffed at the name. "We were the best students in our class. Of course he got into Yale and I didn't but you know, I did haze a teacher. But...yeah. He and I were-" Blair gulped, suddenly realizing she was arguing her point a little too vehemently. And Jenny did, too.

"Oh. My. Fucking. God. You _and_ Dan. You. And. Dan. Oh my-" Blair's eyes closed shut.

Jenny's eyes looked like saucers. "I can't believe it!" Blair banged her head on the table, disgusted with herself.

"Does Chuck know? Oh my god, what about Serena? Holy-"

"Shhhh," Blair admonished. "Could you please..." Blair looked around to see who could have possible overheard. Namely her mother.

"Do not spread that rumor, ok?" Blair grabbed for a bottle of water and started chugging it.

"You and Dan. I can't even-"

"You can, and you will. You must keep this to yourself, Jenny! Nobody knows. Nobody. I can't believe I told you. What was I thinking?"

"Well, to be fair, I figured it out. I have good intuition. So is it serious? How did it happen?" Blair shook her head at the fact that Jenny was all up in her business now. "I just have so many questions! And Dan is cheating on Serena! Holy crap!"

"Jenny, listen to me. As of this moment, we are going to pretend that you know nothing. You will not tell Rufus, or my mother, or any other human being on this planet. Am I making myself clear?" Jenny smiled slyly, before nodding her compliance. She looked around the room searching the air for a new topic, though the new elephant in the room was growing larger by the second.

Jenny's smile was growing by the second as she attempted to change the subject. "So you're leaving in the morning? I guess you'll-" she bit her tongue on what she really wanted to say, "be able to make Nate's Christmas party?"

Blair heaved a sigh by the fact that she was having to hear about an Archibald gathering from Jenny. "Nate's having a Christmas party?" Blair replied, as if going to a party was the last thing she was interested in at the moment.

"Yeah, it's tomorrow night. I was going to fly back for it, but Rufus suddenly decided he wanted to come here for the holidays. And of course I've got the samples I need to get started on. I really wanted to go back to New York for the holidays, though." She grabbed a random piece of fabric and started to play with it.

Jenny knew the party information was killing Blair. "Maybe Nate told Chuck and expected Chuck to tell you?" she suggested.

"Maybe," Blair shrugged. Chuck had texted Blair the night that she left to tell her that Dorota had agreed to keep Henry. She really didn't care if Nate told Chuck about the damn party. But she did wonder if Dan and Serena were going. She was suddenly curious.

"I'm sure..Dan and Serena are attending." Blair wanted to know, but didn't want to be obvious.

Jenny gave Blair a mischievous smile. "Was that an actual question? You should just call Dan and ask."

"I cannot just call Dan! May I remind you that we are both married to other people, and you speaking so cavalierly about the situation makes me want to muzzle you and stick you in the closet! And my marital problems are not something I am open to discussing with you at this time! Or ever!" Blair added for good measure.

"Marital problems?" Eleanor's voice rang out from behind her, apparently catching the tail end of the conversation. She stood there, peering over her glasses, hand propped on her hip. Thank you, Jenny. Thank you, so much. "Blair, are you and Chuck, having some sort of trouble?" Eleanor seemed agitated, as if somehow this was about her.

"No mother. Jenny and I are simply speaking in hyperbole." Eleanor gave her a confused look. "Now, I've got to go back and pack. Have to get back to New York to set up those meetings. And this week has been as successful as I could have hoped for, but now I must get back to my son and my husband." Blair rose from the table, grabbing some portfolios and her water bottle.

"I thought Chuck was in Hong Kong," Jenny gave Blair a teasing smirk, though thankfully Eleanor seemed to miss it.

"Well, I am certainly relieved to hear that. The last thing you need is another divorce on your hands."

Blair bit her tongue. "Right. Well, nothing to worry about. Now if you'll excuse me I've got a flight to catch. Happy holidays, mother. See you next year."

"Well, dear. Cyrus and I are coming for New Year's."

"Really? I thought you were spending New Year's at the chateau with Daddy?" Blair knew she was coming off as disappointed.

"Well I want to see my grandson. And of course my successful son-in-law. Tell Henry he'll get his Christmas gifts when we see him. It will be like having two Christmases!" Oh Blair was going to tell him something, but it was probably going to involve many expletives.

Blair shrugged, ready to end the converstion. "Well then. I guess I'll see you next week." She hugged her mother before turning to face Jenny. She was grinning as she gestured to Blair that her lips were sealed.

* * *

Serena checked her face in her compact as they pulled up to Nate's, pleased with what she saw. There hadn't been much talking between her and Dan on the limo ride over, but it had been peaceful. There were moments of small talk-what the estate looked like, how much money he had put into renovating it. But there was no further mention of the discussion from the previous weekend. All of their interactions had been neat, sanitary, and, well...boring. It suited Dan just fine.

Dan stood in awe of Nate's new digs. The house was lit up in white lights, as were several large pines around the circular drive. There seemed to be a backlog as several couples stood in line, waiting for entry into the mansion. As Serena and Dan waited to file in, Dan looked around to see if he recognized anyone. It seemed to be an eclectic group. There were a few people their age and a few kids, but it mostly seemed to be older people. Snooty, gray, and distinguished. Dan wasn't sure how long he'd be able to tolerate it.

"Serena van der Woodsen!" Dan heard a voice ring out over the crowd. After waiting in line for entry, they had finally made their way into a parlor type area. A pianist was playing Christmas tunes on a Steinway grand, and small groups of people were drinking and laughing. Dan didn't know a single person. A small woman, probably in her sixties, made her way over to where Serena and Dan were standing.

"Hi, Mrs. Cartwright. So good to see you! It's actually Humphrey now," Serena corrected as she stuck out her hand to show Mrs. Cartwright that she was indeed married."

"Well, I think I had heard that. I do think I remember your grandmother telling me you were seeing a boy named Humphrey at some point, but that you had broken up. Oh CeCe. I do miss her." Mrs. Cartwright placed her hand over her heart in sympathy. Dan stood by. The woman either didn't see him or didn't want to acknowledge his presence, even though it was obvious he was the Humphrey in question.

"Yes, well we all miss her. But this is Dan." She placed her hands on his shoulder. "My husband." Mrs. Cartwright looked at Dan in confusion. "Well, I see." She looked him over from head to toe, astonished. "Well you seem like you're put together to me. I would have never guessed from the descriptions CeCe used to give me that this was him." She continued to look him over. "Yes. I like it. I like what I'm seeing. Quite a bit!"

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Cartwright," Dan said as he shook her hand.

"Oh, please. Call me Dorothy."

"Ok. Dorothy." Dan stood in horror as it looked like Mrs. Cartwright was probably undressing him with her eyes. Growing increasingly uncomfortable, he caught sight of Nate and immediately excused himself.

"It's been a pleasure..Dorothy." He stopped by the bar to grab himself a Scotch on his way to say hello to the host.

"Glad you made it, man." Nate looked across the room at Serena. "She looks happy. You must have kept your damsel saving a secret."

"Right," Dan said. "Let's just keep that between ourselves." He took a giant swig of Scotch. "Hey, do you think you could have invited a few more geriatrics to your housewarming slash Christmas extravaganza? I look around the room and I have to tell you, if all of these old ladies are like Mrs. Cartwright I may have to go hide out in your guest house."

"Yeah, sorry. A lot of these people are friends of the Van der bilts and the other half are work associates. Most of the younger crew bailed on me. Chuck's in Hong Kong, apparently opening a new hotel. Blair's in Paris. Jenny, well you know already I'm sure, decided to stay in Paris for the holidays. So, this is what we're left with. You, me, and Serena." Nate shrugged as he took in an eyeful of Mrs. Cartwright grinding up against one of Nate's editors. "Now tell me that's not entertaining!" Nate laughed and gave Dan a pat on the back. "But honestly, if you need to escape the guest house is open. Just fire up the big screen and enjoy yourself. I promise no one will bug you."

Serena was now flirting her way through the room, stopping to speak to an older gentleman who was probably getting a little too handsy. Any other husband would have been jealous. But Dan was cool with it.

"Oh, hey, I see some people I need to say hello to. Try to have some fun tonight, okay?" Dan laughed as he watched Nate make a bee line through the crowd towards a couple standing near the piano. He continued to watch from his little corner of the room, seeing if any if these people would make good characters for his next book, when he heard his phone's text chime go off. It was from a blocked number.

_"I bet Mrs. Cartwright had some moves back in her day. She looked like she wanted to devour you."_

Dan quickly looked around, confused. Someone was messing with him. He wasn't sure it would get him any answers, but he responded anyway with:

_"Do I know you? And don't insult Mrs. Cartwright. She still has some lovely moves."_

He looked around the room again, waiting to see if anyone was texting or looking down at their phone. He soon received another text.

_"Yes. I'm sure Mrs. Cartwright still has some lovely moves. But mine are...better."_

Dan was intrigued. He hoped that this wasn't a guy messing with him, because he was more than a little turned on. He started to walk through the crowd, finding himself in a dimly lit hallway. He heard the sound of another text.

_"Where exactly do you think you're going?"_

_"Wouldn't you like to know?" _Dan quickly responded.

His heart was racing now. There was no one in the parlor who could possibly be texting him. At least not that he could tell. He sent off another text.

_"Actually, I hope that you're coming to find me..."_

Dan's breath hitched, before sending back another reply. "_How about a hint first?"_

_"Absolutely. Past the pool..take a right at the tennis courts."_

Dan could only hope that Leatherface wasn't going to be out there to greet him with a chainsaw, because he was going all in now. He worked his way down the hall and found himself in the kitchen where caterers and staff were buzzing about. There was a back door which he could only hope would give him access to the pool and tennis courts. He tried the doorknob and peered out. Bingo.

_"What's taking you so long?"_

Dan took a deep breath. "_Not very patient, are we?"_

He began to follow the cobblestone path that led from the house to the pool. It was cold out, but not unbearable, so the fact that he left his coat inside wasn't that big of a deal. Ok, there was the pool. His heart started to pound as he came upon the tennis courts, and as he looked to the right. It now made sense-he was looking at the guest house. Of course. Nate Archibald was obviously messing with him. Dan shook his head as his phone chimed again.

_"I'm going to need you to go ahead and unzip your pants for me."_

_"_What the fuck?" Dan suddenly stopped. If Nate was playing a joke on him, he had just crossed the line. He was curious and _furious_ now.

_"You're not suddenly getting shy on me, are you?"_

Dan's confusion was growing by the minute. He took a deep breath as he got came to the guest house front door. He inhaled one last time, then slowly turned the doorknob, carefully pushing the door open. It was dark, and Dan immediately felt around for a light switch when something, or rather someone grabbed his hand and slammed the door shut. Dan let out a shout as the lights flipped on.

"What the fuck! Blair!? How did you? How are you here?" Blair stood before him, more than pleased with herself. She innocently place her index finger to her lip.

"I wanted to surprise you." She stepped in closer to Dan pressing her hands against his shoulders and pushing him up against the door. She leaned in for a sultry kiss, which Dan couldn't help but reciprocate. She pulled back. "Are you surprised?" Her dark eyes were hypnotizing him, as they always did, and he couldn't think straight.

"Am I surprised? I just..I mean were you watching me through the window or something?" Blair played coy. "And I thought you were in Paris. What about your phone? Did you get a new number?"

"I might have gotten an additional phone..one that Chuck can't trace."

She bit her lip then slowly looked down at Dan's zipper. Blair returned her gaze to him. "I'm very disappointed in you, Humphrey." She licked her lips, her little pink tongue left adrift as she locked eyes with him again. Her hand began taking a southward route, pausing to free some buttons on his shirt. "You obviously weren't prepared for me. And for that I'm going to have to ask you to keep your hands up agains the wall."

Dan couldn't speak. His senses were on overload now as Blair flipped off the light with one hand while her other hand continued to trace his body downward over his hard stomach. Dan was breathing hard now and his hands were latched onto the wall as directed. Blair then began to kneel before him, as she continued to keep her eyes on his. She gave his rapidly growing erection a rough tug. She followed that up by gently running her knuckles along the underside of his bulge. Dan could feel every pulse point in his body ignite as his head tilted backwards against the wall.

She unzipped him slowly, then countered that maneuver by rapidly unbuckling his belt and pulling it clean off in one stroke. With both hands she roughly pulled his pants down. He looked down and watched Blair's lips purse, and he knew the good part was moments away. She was still watching him as she slowly began to suck on his cock. She first gave the tip a quick taste, then swirled her tongue around it, nearly sending Dan into a convulsion. A devilish smile drifted upon her face with the reaction. She then surprised him by taking a little bite which nearly sent him over the edge. He moaned, biting his lip as he tried to maintain some type of control. Blair then worked her way up his shaft, slowly sliding her tongue over the entire length of him. He was so incredibly hard, and she was making him feel incredible. He never wanted this to end. She pumped him slowly with her fist and Dan grunted in appreciation. She then placed both hands around his shaft, moving them in opposite directions as she continued to take him farther in her mouth.

She gave the absolute best head he'd ever had in his life. It had something to do with those lips, the suction, and her hands were always so perfectly placed, and the way she used her nails...

Dan moved his hands into Blair's hair, gently pulling on her loose curls. She looked up at him. He was obviously breaking the rules, but she would let it slide. This time. He began to massage her head as she continued to work him, his fingers weaving in and out of her curls, and she moaned in appreciation. She once again focused on his tip, alternating between sucking and blowing on it, and Dan shivered from the feeling. She then took him in as far as she could, pausing, as her fingertips gently caressed his balls.

"You are so fucking incredible," he said, out of breath. She released him, and he decided it was time to return the favor.

Dan pulled Blair off of him, and she pouted at the loss of contact until she realized what he was doing. He picked her up, pulling her up around his hips, and walked her over to a nearby leather couch. Setting her down roughly, he worked his hands up her skirt massaging and clawing his way up to the edge of her tights and panties. He quickly pulled them off, causing Blair to squeal in delight. He pushed her skirt upwards, giving himself full access to her pussy as he threw her legs over his shoulders. He gently shoved two fingers inside of her and she squirmed beneath him. She gave a breathy laugh as he pulled his fingers out and started to caress her folds. He continued to work her with his fingers until his need to taste her overcame everything. Dan place his head between her legs, kissing his way up her thighs until he found her clit and gave it a very quick lick with his tongue. Her hips bucked upward, and he pushed her back into place, this time gripping her hips. He then blew on her and she bucked up again. Dan let one hand come around and started to unbutton her blouse. He began to massage her through her bra, working her nipple through the black lace. One of Blair's hands reached out to hold his head at her entrance as the other one helped him massage her breasts. She wasn't sure how long she would last with this much stimulation.

"Dan," she breathed out. "I'm not complaining, but I haven't had your cock inside me in a week. And I-" Before she could finish her sentence, Dan grabbed her, flipping her over so her ass was sticking out in the air. He gave it a tiny smack and Blair moaned in ecstasy. He was taking control now. He pulled her blouse off and unclasped her bra, watching as Blair helped him to rid herself of it. Dan took in the picture of Blair's bare ass, and her skirt hiked up around her hips.

"God I've missed this ass," he sighed. Still on all fours, she turned her head to face him, her eyes pleading with his. "Dan..," she whined. "Please.." Dan grinned. He wasn't quite done teasing her yet, though. She jolted as she felt his tongue on her ass, taking his time, enjoying the smoothness of it. Her body was incredible and he wanted to taste every inch of it.

"Dan, I can't-" Dan knew she couldn't hold out any longer. Without another moment of hesitation, he entered her from behind and she let out a sigh. She rocked her hips backwards and they quickly found a rhythm. Once again, Dan's hands mixed themselves into her hair, winding around and playing with her curls. His hands floated down along her smooth back, rubbing and caressing it, then down to her ass giving it another playful spank, which she seemed to really enjoy. He then picked up the pace and Blair's moans got louder in appreciation. One hand wandered around to her clit, and she convulsed at the added stimulation. Dan knew she was close, and he completely enveloped her body with his, taking them both into the couch. After a few more thrusts from behind, and a few more strokes of her clit, Blair completely lost it. Dan had to cover her mouth to keep the whole main house from hearing her. He came hard right after her, his sweat mixing with hers.

He moved off of her for fear of suffocating her, and she whined in protest. "Hold me," she pouted, and Dan did as he was told. He leaned back into the couch, pulling her up so she was sitting in his lap, then pulled her backwards with him so she was lying on top of him. He grabbed a blanket from a nearby ottoman and draped it over them. It was pitch dark, and the music from the party was wafting through the air. It felt peaceful. Dan wondered if anyone was missing him from the party. The sound of a softly sleeping Blair soon added to the array of sounds, and he gently touched her cheek, putting a stray hair back into place.

He would have to wake her at some point. Right now, though, the moonlight creeping through the window lit Blair's face perfectly, and Dan couldn't get over how ethereal she looked. She was perfect. This was perfect.

But the sound of footsteps that were now coming down the path to the guest house...

That could be a disaster.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

"Oh shit," Dan said to himself as the sound of footsteps got increasingly louder...

"Blair," he whispered as he shook her gently. She didn't respond. "Blair!" He tried again, a little more loudly now and she stirred a bit.

"What is it?" She whined groggily. Blair's eyes were still shut tightly as she gripped onto his shirt.

"I think we're about to have company," Dan said softly but urgently. Blair's eyes then sprung open. She bolted upright, holding the blanket up against her body.

And then they both heard it. The sound of Serena's voice. Coming in loud and clear.

"Are you sure he came down here? It looks really dark inside." Dan's eyes grew wide with panic. Without a moment's hesitation, he leapt from the couch, nearly tripping over the pants he had left in a pile on the floor, to ensure that he had indeed locked the door after Blair had so roughly pulled him inside. He exhaled in relief when he realized it was definitely locked.

"Yeah, it _is_ dark. That's weird. I could have sworn I saw the lights on earlier." It was Nate. Nate, who no doubt had keys to his own guest house.

Nate...

Serena...

Nate _and_ Serena.

"Yeah, I told Dan he could come hang down here to get away from Mrs. Cartwright and the other old fogies. Maybe he opted for somewhere else. Not sure how the door got locked, though..."

Serena knocked on the door and leaned over to look through the window, as Nate reached for his keys. It was too dark inside to make out anything. She knocked again. "Dan? Are you in there?"

Nate and Serena's voices had officially permeated the giant bubble of contentment he and Blair had been partaking in. Not just permeated. Popped it.

"Dan!" Blair whispered from the couch. She was finally sensing just how imminent the danger was. She rose to get up and collect her clothing from off the floor, pulling down her skirt and throwing on her blouse while still holding onto her bra, panties, and tights. "This way!" She gestured over her shoulder to follow her towards the back bedroom. Dan quickly scrambled behind her, grabbing the blanket they had just used and any other loose articles of clothing or shoes he stumbled upon. He turned momentarily upon hearing a key enter the lock, then quickly retreated.

"I know I didn't lock this door!" Nate was trying to convince himself, going through the day's events in his head. "I was in here this morning testing out the new speaker system," Nate explained to Serena. He cut on the lights.

Dan's pupils were growing wider by the second as Blair pulled him into the bedroom closet and shut the sliding door behind them.

"Dan?" Serena's voice rang out again.

Blair and Dan huddled in the bedroom closet. It was pitch black, but Dan could still see Blair smiling through the darkness. The little minx was enjoying herself just a little too much. Blair could feel how nervous Dan was and she decided to have a little fun with him.

"I can't be this close to you without..." she whispered, pulling him in for a languorous kiss. She pulled away suddenly, gripping tightly into Dan's hair. "Your heartbeat is so loud," she giggled. "Doesn't it turn you on that they could just find us..." _kiss_ "in here at any moment..." Dan swallowed hard as Blair's lips moved to his neck. His eyes rolled back in response. She was absolutely killing him.

Nate did a quick check of the living room. Definitely no sign of Dan. Nothing out of the ordinary at all. Everything looked exactly as it did when he was here earlier.

"Oh, Nate! This is so cute," Serena commented upon first seeing the living area of the guest house. "It's like a little love cottage down here!" Blair nearly snorted against Dan's neck at her words, and he gripped her waist tightly in punishment. She let out a tiny moan of apology.

"Well, where else could he be?" Serena huffed, as she changed the subject back to her missing husband. "There are people I want to introduce him to!" She sighed in annoyance.

"Ah, cut him some slack. He'll reappear soon. You know Dan. So curious. Maybe he found some inspiration and decided to sneak away to make notes, or whatever writers do." He had definitely found some inspiration, Dan thought to himself as Blair licked his earlobe. And from the looks of things he was about to find even more.

"Yes, he's a very curious boy, indeed," Blair whispered in between kisses down Dan's chest. Dan decided to shut her up. He grabbed her ass roughly and Blair let out a quick squeal before he had a chance to muzzle her with his lips.

"Did you hear that?" Serena looked around. "Sounded like a little yipping dog." Nate looked back in confusion. Of course Mr. Oblivious didn't hear anything. Serena shrugged. Maybe she had imagined it. She started to walk through the room. "Mind if I take a peek?" She asked, gesturing to the hallway leading to the rest of the guesthouse.

"Oh, sure, go ahead." Nate followed behind as Serena walked toward the bathroom. As they walked, Nate offered her information on the remodel he just completed. "I decided to go with granite in the bathroom. I like the natural look. Oh, and check this out. The steam shower has like twenty wall jets. You're literally getting sprayed everywhere!" he laughed. Nate was very proud of his guest bathroom. "Oh and the toilet-obviously the seat's heated. But...it also sprays you when you're, you know, done. After you flush. It's environmentally friendly."

"Okay, too much information." Serena laughed. "But really...wow! It's truly incredible, Nate." She started walking towards the bedroom.

Blair's heart was beating as fast as Dan's now. She had her head propped against his chest as he ran his fingers along her back and underneath her blouse. They were both just waiting and listening. And touching.

Serena flipped the light on in the bedroom. Dan and Blair could see each other more clearly now. They were so getting busted. Serena and Nate were mere inches away now!

"Oh, wow! This bedroom is a really nice size," Serena commented. "Who was your designer, Nate? It's so light and airy."

"Amanda Nisbet." Nate responded quickly, as if interior designers were something he was now an expert on. "She really grasped the openness I was going for, as you can see."

"Oh, the bed!" Serena squealed in delight. "Feels nice!" She jumped up on top and Nate let out a laugh. Serena bobbing playfully on the bed was definitely giving him an eyeful.

Meanwhile in the closet, Dan caught Blair rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, it's a Vividus mattress," Nate informed Serena. "Like sleeping on a cloud."

"And how would you know what sleeping on a cloud feels like?" Serena teased. This time Dan was the one rolling his eyes.

Nate laughed nervously as Serena posed for him on the bed, hand on her hip. "Tell me, mister!" She was now batting her eyelashes at him.

"Serena...maybe we should get back to the main house," Nate said as he stepped towards the bed. "I'm sure Dan has probably made his way back up there by now. He'll be the one looking for-"

"Oh let him wait, then," Serena interrupted as she rose up onto her knees. She reached for Nate's collar but he quickly took a step backwards, just out of her reach. It didn't deter her.

"You know I'm kind of glad Dan went missing. Because now..I can show you how much...I've really, really, missed you." She leaned back onto the pillows, posing seductively. Inside the closet, Blair was actively searching for a crack in the door to peek through in order to get a glimpse of the Serena show. Because what she was hearing couldn't possibly be happening. Serena was just humiliating herself now.

"It's only been a month," Nate replied. "You couldn't have missed me that much. Plus we agreed it wouldn't happen again. It was a one time thing. I can't do that to Dan again."

"I counted five times," Serena corrected him. "And each time got significantly better and better and better..." Serena flipped herself on the bed so she was lying on her stomach. Her legs crossed in the air behind her, swinging provocatively.

Dan and Blair slowly turned to look at each other at the revelation. Eyes were wide. Mouths were agape. HOLY SHIT!

A wide smile quickly spread upon Blair's face. It literally could have lit up the entire guest house. Dan was in a state of confusion, however. Should he be angry? Relieved? Both?

"Besides, Dan probably wouldn't care," Serena continued. Just as long as I'm not bothering him. He's always writing. Writing, writing, writing. And he-" Serena's voice got stuck, trying to hold back a sob. She always had a way of making Nate feel sorry for her. Blair wanted to gag.

"What, Serena? What's wrong?" Nate was starting to understand that this went deeper than he originally thought.

"I just-" she took a moment, searching for the right words. "I don't know what I'm doing wrong with him. He just treats me like I'm nonexistent. And when I broached the subject of kids-" Serena let out a soft sob.

Blair turned to study Dan's face. She had known him long enough to sense what he was feeling. She knew from her last conversation with Serena that she was going to bring up the "kids" subject with him. Blair knew Dan couldn't be pleased with this topic suddenly being discussed with Nate-especially considering he had just found out she'd been sleeping with him.

Blair gripped Dan's waist and she gave him a look of consolation as she silently mouthed his name, "Humphrey."

"You know," Serena continued. "I really thought the subject of having kids would get a positive reaction from him. I mean, you were there for the whole Milo thing. He loved that baby. But when I told him I was ready to have kids, he acted like I wanted him to commit murder for me or something. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong." Nate was growing increasingly uncomfortable. He was not expecting to have this conversation in the middle of his Christmas bash. But he was always well mannered, so if Serena needed him, he would try and give her some sort of comfort. Just not in the biblical sense-at least not anymore.

"Well, maybe he's just stressed right now. And honestly, Serena, maybe he's just not ready for kids yet. I think losing Milo-" Nate let out a sincere sigh.

"Let's just say I think he gave his heart to that kid. And he probably just wants to make sure he's fully equipped emotionally before having another go at it. Whatever it is, it's not you. I'm sure of it." Nate reached out his hand to Serena who begrudgingly accepted it.

"Yeah. That makes sense, I guess." Serena shrugged. "I just think-" Before she could finish, Nate decided to put the nix on the conversation.

"I _think_ we should go find him now," Nate suggested. "Tell him what you're feeling. Come with me?" It wasn't really a question, though he had phrased it as such. Nate had guests he'd been ignoring for far too long. And playing psychiatrist to Serena...well she already paid someone else for that.

"Thanks, Nate," Serena said as they walked back out of the bedroom. The talking ended and once again the room went dark as Nate flipped the lights off. When they heard the front door shut, Blair and Dan remained in their positions inside the closet. Dan was still gripping Blair tightly and vice versa. She was the first to break the silence.

"Humphrey?" She said, still whispering, though there was no one else around. Blair knew that conversation had been a lot to take in for him. And being forced to hear it all while trapped in a closet was just the icing on the cake. "What are you thinking?" she asked, biting her lip.

There was a long pause before he spoke. "I'm not sure. I can't really process-" He knew he wasn't exactly upset, but the picture of his future with Serena had changed drastically. He had recently come to the conclusion that there really wasn't a future with her, but now with the conversation he just happened to overhear, things would no doubt be accelerating. It turns out Dan wasn't the only one who had cheated. He had always wondered if Serena still had feelings for Nate. He had officially just gotten an answer, albeit a pretty convoluted one, because apparently she was still committed to making it work with him. And committed to having his children as well. It was just like old times where Serena would string both him and Nate along. Only this time, Nate didn't seem to want a commitment from her. He didn't want _anything_ from her. He was actually sticking up for Dan and encouraging Serena to be patient with him!

"Come on. Let's get out of here," Dan sighed. He slid the door open allowing Blair to step out first. He was quiet as he grabbed his clothes and quickly started dressing.

"Dan, why are you rushing? We're safe. They're not going to come back in here." Blair was concerned, but also a bit disappointed that her sneak sex attack had been so rudely tainted by the appearance of blonde and blonder.

"I need to do it. I just need to end it," Dan rattled off. "I knew when we couldn't find anything to talk about on our honeymoon that it had been a mistake to marry Serena. We have absolutely nothing in common! Nothing. I mean she never wants to go to exhibits with me, she won't go to the Angelika. Oh! She slept with Nate. There's just nothing-"

"And are you angry with her for sleeping with Nate?" Blair queried, wondering if there was any jealousy at all on his part.

"Angry? No, I don't think-I'm not angry. It just helped to cement my decision. This is what I've been needing to do this whole time!" Blair eyes locked into his, knowing exactly what he had decided to do. "Tell her I want a divorce."

"So you're asking her for a divorce? Tonight? I mean, tomorrow's Christmas Eve." Blair stammered through her words as she thought about the effect this could have on her own marriage. She was almost inspired to do the same. Ask Chuck for a divorce. But a vengeful Chuck was far more dangerous than a vengeful Serena. She also wasn't ready to endure the judgmental looks from the Upper East Side hypocrites or the searing words from Eleanor. She knew that time was rapidly approaching, but she still wasn't officially ready. At any rate, Blair took some comfort in knowing she didn't have to feel guilty for the disintegration of Dan's marriage. The impending divorce was simply the natural evolution of two individuals who had absolutely nothing in common and who had simply gotten together out of convenience. Blair sat down on the bed.

She watched him as he finished buttoning his shirt and sat down on the bed next to her. "I have to do it," he continued, as if trying to rationalize it to her. "The sooner the better. Serena's not happy. I'm not happy. And I love you. I want to be with you."

"I want to be with you, too. I just don't think you should jump into this decision. Not right now, anyway. Not in the middle of the holidays. Maybe wait until the new year-"

"Blair. Why are you trying to talk me out of this? I'm not jumping into this decision. You know better than anyone what it's like being stuck in a loveless marriage. Why should I wait when I know exactly what I want?" Blair was starting to fidget. She knew what was coming next.

"Like I told you before, I'm not going to pressure you to leave Chuck. My decision to leave Serena has nothing to do with you. The sooner I get it over with the better." He stood up to slide his shoes on. He was now a man on a mission. If he didn't act quickly the surge of confidence he was currently riding would most certainly wane.

Blair nodded. "Okay." She wasn't going to try and talk him out of it. After a slight pause it occurred to her that she needed to tell him about Jenny knowing their secret. "So, I have to tell you something." Dan looked up, concerned by those ominous words.

"When I was in Paris..." She took a deep breath which caused Dan to brace himself for the worst.

"Yeah?"

She decided just to blurt it out. "Your sister may have guessed that we are having an affair and I may have completely confirmed it but then may have also threatened her to keep her mouth shut or else." Blair got it all out in one breath. "I just thought you should know." She looked up at him coyly.

"She just 'guessed,' Blair?" Dan was confused, but Blair nodded. "How could she just guess?" Blair shamefully looked down at the floor.

"Apparently I was in too good of a mood," she shrugged. Naturally, this made Dan laugh.

"And why were you in 'too good of a mood, Blair?'" He walked over to her and pulled her off the bed so she was standing directly in front of him now.

"Don't make me say it," she said meekly, giving a tiny, pleading smile.

"Tell me, Blair," Dan whispered, cupping her face in his hands. Her eyes closed shut at the sound of his voice.

"Are you mad at me?" She asked him in response, still refusing to say what Dan wanted to hear. He studied her face as he leaned into her neck, taking a tiny nibble.

"I am absolutely furious," he said calmly. "I'm thinking you need to be reprimanded." Blair's eyes widened in surprise. Oh yes. She loved to be reprimanded. Blair was loving this new take charge side to Dan. He quickly unzipped his pants and threw Blair backwards onto the bed. She screamed excitedly as Dan fell on top of her.

"God, this mattress does feel like a cloud," Dan commented in between nibbles of her neck, and Blair shut him up immediately as she turned his head and kiss him. There was no time to remove clothes. Blair quickly lifted her skirt to give Dan access and he pulled her hips up to meet his. He quickly entered her in what was to be a short, but unbelievably sweet romp before they would have to part ways.

This time Dan didn't care who heard them...

As they went through the process of putting themselves back together, Dan commented, "I'll talk to Jenny. I know she won't say anything. What did she think, though?"

Blair shrugged. "I think she's just amused." Dan smiled. His sister had once been Blair's protege _and_ enemy. It was amazing to think how far they had all come.

"So how are you getting home, Blair? And I'm still confused about how you got in here without anyone seeing you."

"You know I'm a skilled schemer, Humphrey. And when I _want_ something I sometimes go out of my way to get it." Dan was extremely happy about that.

"Honestly, I think I'm just going to stay here tonight." Her eyes gleamed. "Break in the Vividus. Maybe surprise Nate in the morning."

"Waldorf..." Dan warned.

"Maybe I can try out those water jets." She smiled, knowing she'd get the reaction she craved. The thought of taking Blair in the shower with water shooting at them from all directions was making Dan hard again. He had to be strong.

"I'll sneak out of here in the morning. After a good night's sleep of course. Finish up my last minute Christmas shopping." She jumped back on the bed and laid down, her hair flailing around her. Dan leaned over to kiss her goodbye as if she were Sleeping Beauty.

"And if you're lucky, I might have a little present for you later," Blair mused.

"Oh, I'm counting on it," Dan replied before giving her one last kiss on her forehead.

"Be careful, Blair."

"I always am."

* * *

Somehow, Dan managed to make it back to the main house unnoticed. He was less paranoid than usual, though, after hearing the conversation that had just transpired between Serena and Nate. Fact-they had slept together. Dan had given into his desires, and apparently so had she. They were on even turf now. Except for the fact she knew nothing of his relationship with Blair.

Dan somehow made it to the bar and ordered another Scotch without anyone seeing him. The party was still in full swing and he began to walk the room. He was certainly feeling bold. The moment he saw her, he was going to let Serena know that it was time to leave. He would tell her of his decision tonight. He might even start the conversation in the car.

"There you are, man," Dan heard a voice call out from behind him. Nate grabbed his shoulder and pushed him off to the side. "I think I need to warn you. Serena is pissed. She's been looking for you everywhere." Dan cocked his head to the side, as if that information surprised him. In reality, he didn't care that she was pissed. She had cheated on him and had just tried to sleep with Nate in the guest house while supposedly "looking" for him. That was seriously warped. Dan went with it, though.

"Whoops!" Dan shrugged. "Guess time got away from me. I was simply taking in the grounds. I tried to get into the guesthouse but it was locked." Lying was getting to be more and more fun. And easy. "So I just kept on walking. Oh, I thought I heard some screams coming from nearby. I mean not scary screams or someone being attacked screams. Nothing like that. More like someone's having an orgasm screams?" Dan shrugged again as he imbibed while Nate stared in confused wonder. "But honestly, Nate. Really amazing place you got here." There was a decent sized pause as Nate stared at him.

"Um, did you take something tonight, Man?" Nate was now looking at Dan's pupils.

"No. Did I...? No, no way. I've just been-" He motioned at the drink tumbler in his hand. "This is grade A stuff here. You obviously spared no expense for the par-tay. Well done."

"Oh, look. There's Serena." Nate motioned toward the front entrance. "Good luck." He patted Dan on the back and Dan watched as Nate moved through the room to speak to a silver haired gentleman and his equally silver haired spouse.

Dan looked up to see Serena glaring at him. He quickly slugged his Scotch and set his glass down. This was it.

He walked over to Serena, and before he could get any words out she was already laying into him.

"Where the hell have you been, Dan? How can you just go awol at a party? Where are your manners?" Dan didn't respond immediately. He took a moment and then took a deep breath as he looked Serena in the eye.

"It's time to go," Dan said. He was firm and self assured as he turned towards the main entrance and slowly walked out the door. Serena was in shock as her husband chose to ignore her questions, and had suddenly informed her they were leaving. She wasn't ready to leave! She shook her head, wondering what the hell this was all about.

"Dan," she huffed while entering the limo and she closed the door behind her. He was already sitting there, one leg crossed over the other. "What is this about, Dan? Why are we suddenly leaving?"

"I want a divorce." And there it was. He had done it. It has just come out. It was easy. Too easy.

Serena was left speechless as she looked down at the seat. He waited for her to respond, but when she didn't, he spoke again.

"I know you know we're just not compatible, Serena. We tried-"

"We tried? We tried?!" Serena blurted out. "You mean _I_ tried. You didn't try at all!" Tears were starting to form now and Dan was starting to feel like an asshole.

"I'm sorry. I really thought this marriage was what I wanted at the time," Dan explained. "I really did. But I just think we're too different. We're not compatible anymore. We're not seventeen and this isn't a fairytale. And I'm not crashing your cotillion in order to make a point to your grandmother." He took a moment. "And I don't want to end up resenting you." Dan knew it was asking for too much for this breakup to be amicable, especially after hearing her conversation with Nate. There was just too much pent up frustration on Serena's part.

"Resenting me? You don't want to resent _me_?" Serena scoffed as she shoved Dan in the chest.

"You're right! This was definitely not a fairy tale. Getting married in Chuck and Blair's living room surrounded by our friends and family while they looked on from their front row couch seats? Yeah, that's just what I had always planned on!" She had officially lost it now. "And Snow White never had to beg the prince to look at her, or have dinner with her, or have sex!"

"You're right, Serena. You've just summed it up. I'm not the guy for you! You deserve better. I want you to be happy and you've just told me you're not happy with me. So let's just be done with it, okay? This can be a new beginning for both of us!" Serena glared at Dan as she wiped the ugly tears from her face.

"And asking me for a divorce in a limo outside of Nate's Christmas party? You have got a lot of nerve. Well you can go to hell you arrogant prick! Get out. I'm not riding back into the city with you." Yep, Dan should have seen that one coming. He slowly opened the door, giving Serena one last look before he exited. "I'll-"

Before he could tell her he would call her to make arrangements to move out his things, the limo sped off, leaving him in the dust.

"Call you later I guess..." Dan knew he didn't want to go back inside the party. Nate would be filled with questions. He looked at his phone and quickly texted Blair at her new number.

_"Make room for me on the Vividus."_

* * *

Blair snuggled up against Dan, her head on his chest. It was nice waking up to someone, especially someone she didn't absolutely despise. She watched him for a while as he snoozed away, his lips twitching as he dreamed. His lips were _so_ kissable. Just as she was about to lean up and steal one from him, her phone buzzed from its place on the side table. It was Dorota.

"Hello, Dorota," Blair answered, trying hard to give no indication that she was currently in the throes of inexorable bliss.

"Miss Blair. Where are you? I can no longer keep Mister Henry here in Queens. He break all of Leo's toys. He wants to go home. He misses his mama." Blair sighed. She knew she had to go.

"Okay, Dorota. Tell him I'll be there soon to pick him up. And if he wants Santa to come he had better behave himself. And tell Leo I'll replace his toys with better ones. In fact, I'll take him to FAO Schwarz for a shopping spree. We can all go together. Have lunch! Make a day of it. Sound good?" Dorota was immediately suspicious.

"Why you in such good mood? And it Christmas Eve. Everywhere will be packed if we shop today."

"Oh don't be such a grinch, Dorota. I simply have the Christmas spirit, that's all. Now get ready." Before Dorota could answer her back, she hung up. She hadn't noticed that Dan was now wide awake and staring at her, a huge grin on his face. "So how are you going to get back to the city quickly when you have no transportation?" Dan wondered. Blair had no immediate answer. "Not to mention...you only have yesterday's clothes."

"Not true. She quickly reached under her side of the bed and pulled out a travel bag from underneath. I planned this whole thing. Do you really thing I would come here without a fresh pair of clothes to change into? Please, Humphrey. When will you ever stop underestimating me?" He watched her, amused, as she vacated the bed. Blair was on full display for him now and he couldn't look away. "Now. Shower time." She smirked. It was definitely an invitation as he watched her walk out of the bedroom and make a quick right into the bathroom. She gave him a suggestive look before she disappeared. He then heard the sound of those infamous water jets. Thank you, God.

Dan quickly found his way into the bathroom and he watched for a moment as Blair rubbed herself with a bar of soap. She looked up, feigning surprise upon seeing Dan watching her. She was definitely putting on a show as she slowly worked the bubbles up and down her body, stopping at her most intimate points. Dan knew she was enjoying it and he was quickly losing control. He stepped inside behind her and gently nudged her into the wall of water. He laughed as it sprayed into her eyes.

"Humphrey!"

"I'm so sorry. Let me make it up to you." He turned her around. Blair's eyes were still shut tightly from the sting of the water and the soap. Her annoyed face was replaced with a smile as she felt him start to lift her up against the wall. "Humphrey!" she gasped. "Don't you ever get enough?"

"That's a funny question coming from you," he quickly retorted before he entered her once again. She sighed in appreciation. This really will be a Merry Christmas, she thought.

The water beating off of their skin felt so sensual, and Dan took his time with her. He looked down to watch the beading of water droplets on her breasts as they trickled off of her nipples, and then captured her lips with his. He didn't think he could feel any closer to her but after everything that had transpired in the last twelve hours, all he could think of was how right this felt. Like a dream.

He sped up slightly, but still kept his movements at a smooth, even pace. Her tiny moans encouraged him to move in for yet another kiss. Supporting her with his weight, he grabbed her hands and moved her arms up over her head to give himself better access to her breasts. He immediately went to work, licking and sucking the droplets of water off of her nipple as she groaned for more. Her breath hitched and she started to scream.

"Dan! God. Oh God!" He smirked as he pushed into her harder, feeling her tighten around him. Blair closed her eyes in satisfaction as she felt him kissing along her breasts. He knew she was about to come as he began to pound into her harder. She came with a loud moan, which completely sent Dan with her over the edge.

"I never want to leave this shower," Dan teased as he gently let her down, resting on her in exhaustion.

"Well, you may not have to," Blair answered as she pushed him away and finished washing her hair. "Because where else are you going to stay? I don't think Serena really wants you as a roommate." Dan hadn't really thought about his living arrangements until now. "There's always the loft with Rufus. But then I'd have to get the Rufus talk. I suppose I could ask Nate if I can stay here. Might be kind of weird now that I know he's been banging Serena, but..." Dan quickly grabbed Blair's shampoo and squirted some into his hand. Blair looked at him in annoyance.

"What? I like L'occitane," Dan smirked.

"And you've been banging me so..." Point taken.

"Well, I need to hurry up," Blair said. The bubble was once again about to pop. "I have to get my devil child before Dorota murders him." Dan thought about telling her "what goes around comes around" but didn't think that would go over too well.

"So I'll just call a cab. Can you please distract Nate so I can leave without him seeing me?" Dan didn't necessarily love the idea of seeing Nate this morning. He would then have to tell him about the whole divorce thing. But it was probably the only way to get Blair out of there unnoticed, while securing himself a place to stay at the same time.

"Thank you," she sing-songed as she fluttered her eyelashes at him and cut the water off all at once, leaving him standing there dripping. He watched as she exited the shower and grabbed a bath towel, once again leaving him behind. He snapped one more mental picture of her glorious backside for safe keeping. She bent over as she dried herself, then peeked over her shoulder. Dan shook his head. She knew exactly what she was doing. And he loved it.

Thirty minutes and a short make out session later, Dan and Blair had finally made their way to the door. Blair looked fresh and was positively glowing. And Dan looked fresh-er than he had. As fresh as he could look while still entertaining last night's clothes.

"So, call me?" she nudged him in the chest and he captured her hand, playing with it for a moment.

"Absolutely," he promised. Dan was already feeling the incoming loss and she hadn't even left yet. She smiled. It was a smile that told him they were going to be fine. Blair gave him one last kiss on the cheek before working her hand out of his grip.

Dan nodded as she quickly walked up the path. He figured he needed to get to the main house quickly and start his distraction tactics-and secure himself a place of residence. He went to knock on the back door but it magically opened before he even had a chance to knock.

"Dan?"Nate asked as he opened the door. "I saw you coming up the path. What are you-? Did you sleep here last night? Is Serena with you? You both just took off without saying anything." Nate's questions let him know that he hadn't seen Blair leave right before him.

"To answer one of your questions. Yes. I did sleep here last night. In your guest house." Nate was trying his best to comprehend, but Dan knew further explanation would be in order.

"Well, I uh...can I come in?" Dan finally asked.

"Oh, yeah. Sure..." He motioned for Dan to come inside. "You want some coffee?" Dan nodded and had a seat at the kitchen table. Nate poured him a cup and set it in front of him.

"I asked Serena for a divorce last night." Nate, having just taken a sip of coffee, did a spit-take into his mug. He looked at Dan with shock.

"Dan. A divorce? Really? I don't understand. What happened? You two were fine just a few hours ago." Uh Nate? Really? Dan thought to himself. There's no way Nate actually bought that after Serena's little impromptu therapy session last night. Dan refrained from challenging him, however.

"Yeah, well. Serena and I-we've been on divergent paths for a while now. She's probably better suited for someone like you." Nate did yet another spit-take into his cup. Zing...

"Someone like me? Why do you say that?" Nate asked, nearly choking. Dan slyly shrugged as he took a sip of his coffee. "I just think you guys have something."

Nate suddenly stood more erect. "What do you mean by 'have something?'" He was getting flustered and Dan was enjoying every moment of it.

"Just that you two kind of complement each other. And now that I'm out of the picture-"

"Dan," Nate said firmly. "I don't want Serena. You have to know that. Don't tell me you're divorcing her because-"

"Because of what?" Dan was on a roll now. Nate didn't know exactly where he could go at this point.

"Because of-" Nate thought back to the previous night. Serena hadn't mentioned Dan knowing anything about their encounter. Had she? Or maybe she had. Nate was so confused. Maybe that's why Dan was being so dismissive of her. It all made sense. She told him. And that's why he asked for a divorce.

"Look, man. I don't know what Serena told you, but it's not like it was planned or anything. And it's not like it meant anything." Dan feigned a surprised face.

"What are you saying, Nate? That you and Serena slept together?" Nate's face fell flat.

"You mean you didn't already know? I thought you were telling me this because she told you we-" Dan calmly took a sip of coffee.

"I'm such an idiot. I'm sorry, Dan. I really am. It was just one of those deals. We were at the Delancey wedding. We both had a little too much to drink." Boy did that sound familiar.

"Obviously if you had been there it wouldn't have happened and I wouldn't be here begging for your forgiveness. I feel really terrible." It was hard to be mad at Nate even after he slept with your wife. Perhaps he would have been more irritated with him if he truly loved Serena. But as it turned out, he didn't. So really, no harm done.

"It's okay, man." Dan was going to make this easy for him and let him completely off the hook. "But, I do need a favor." Nate looked up, amazed by the fact that Dan seemed completely okay with everything and all he was asking for was a "favor."

"Anything."

"Can I stay in your guest house for a while?" Nate immediately nodded his head yes. "Absolutely. I mean, is that it?"

"Yeah. For now. Oh, and access to one of those Lamborghinis sitting in your carport? You know, in case I have to roll into the city."

Nate nodded again. "Sure. Absolutely. And if you want to stay in the main house-"

"Nah. The guest house will be perfect." Nate suddenly gave Dan a blank look.

"Hey. How _did_ you get into the guest house last night? When Serena and I went to look for you, I know I locked the door behind me."

Dan simply grinned, then offered his mug up for a refill.

* * *

"Miss Blair, my feet hurting so bad. My dogs are doing the banking. Can we please sit down for a moment?" Blair looked around and noticed they were in close proximity to Serendipity3.

"It's barking, Dorota. And fine. I'll approve a rest period. How about we go into Serendipity. Would everyone like a frozen hot chocolate?!" Blair smiled cheerfully at the children in tow. Ana and Leo nodded their heads eagerly while Henry pouted. He stomped his foot. "I want a banana split!"

"Ok..." She forced a smile. "Henry, you can have a banana split. But if I get you a banana split, you're going to need to behave for me the rest of the day, okay? Remember, Santa does not visit little boys with poor behavior." She waited for a response. "Henry?" It took a moment, but he finally relented.

"Okay," he said mildly, and Blair was amazed at the response. She looked up at Dorota. Dorota nodded at her with pride as Blair took charge of her son. It was a victory for Blair.

The group made their way into the packed shop, bags abounding. They managed to be seated right away when one of the managers recognized Henry. Apparently Chuck Bass's son already had clout at all of the ice cream parlors in town. Blair was slightly annoyed by this, but she went with it since it meant no waiting.

They all placed their orders and Blair couldn't help but notice how delightfully quiet Dorota's children were. They had their hands in their laps. They weren't talking or fidgeting. They were well mannered. She looked over at Henry. "Henry, did you enjoy your stay with Dorota?" Henry shrugged. "I guess." Blair nodded. Hey, it was better than no.

Sensing the lull in conversation, Dorota directed her attention on Blair. "And Miss Blair? How was Paris? You just get in this morning?"

"Uh yes," Blair lied. Dorota just loved to catch her off guard and she raised an eyebrow at Blair's response.

"That's funny. I thought flights from Paris never ever land in morning. In fact I remember you tell me-" Blair didn't remember ever telling her anything of the sort. Dorota was simply trying to catch her in a lie.

"Well," Blair interrupted. "That's often true but not always-" Blair looked up to see four frozen hot chocolates and a banana split coming their way. "Oh look! Ice cream time!" She was a little too excited as she watched the server place everyone's orders in front of them. Blair looked up to see Dorota take a sip as she watched her incredulously over her frozen hot chocolate. "Well, isn't this just fun, everyone?" Blair asked the table. We really should do this more often. Maybe we can do it again next week! Ana and Leo would you guys like that? Henry?"

"Dorota?" Blair smiled as she too took a sip of her frozen hot chocolate. "Should we do this every week?" They were now in a stare off-both pairs of lips in lock down on their straws. Blair knew it was coming. A Dorota interrogation was already in the works. Hopefully, she could stave it off for a few days at least. But it was definitely coming.

They finished their desserts in virtual silence. Everyone seemed to have enjoyed them.

"Henry? Did you like that?" Blair asked as she wiped some chocolate off of her son's face with her thumb. The fact that he didn't shove her away was encouraging.

"Oui, maman. Le banana split etait tres delicieux." Blair was pleased that her son chose to respond to her in French. Ana and Leo simply stared at him. Confused.

"Well, where to now?"

"Miss Blair," Dorota interrupted. "We need to go home. It's Christmas Eve. Vanya's relatives probably running all over apartment. Perhaps you and Henry go home too now? Mister Chuck probably wait for you at _your_ apartment."

"Fine," Blair relented. She was in no mood to see Chuck but she supposed it was inevitable.

"I come day after Christmas, though. Miss Eleanor want to confirm New Year's menu with you and caterer. She say absolutely no mushroom anywhere." Blair looked at Dorota.

"Come again? Did you say New Year's menu?"

"Yes, Miss Blair. Your mother having New Year's party over at penthouse. Today I messengered invitations to everyone important. All the buyers at the Bendels and the Bergdorfs and the Saks and the Bloomingdales. And of course all of your friends, too. Mister Nate, Mister Dan, Miss Serena." Dorota was still going through the list in her head.

"My mother...is having a New Year's Eve party...at the penthouse?" Blair shook her head. "She said nothing about having a party. I mean she told me she was coming here, but-"

"She say big shindig necessary to push last minute designs." Blair was more than a little agitated at this new revelation. By no means did she want to hang out at a New Year's Eve party with Serena, Nate, Dan, and Chuck, though the odds of any of them actually showing up were slim to none. Except for Chuck, of course. But the fact that her mother invited them at all was irritating enough.

Dorota grabbed Ana and Leo's hands and their shopping bags and quickly started to move away from the table towards the door. Blair bit her lip as she watched Dorota and her children wave goodbye.

"Merry Christmas Miss Blair and Mister Henry."

"You, too, Dorota." Blair smiled, a little more chipper than she had been seconds earlier. A New Year's eve party meant that she would have to play the happy wife to Chuck. She looked down at Henry who was staring back at her. It was now just the two of them. He had the same deep brown eyes that she did. He smiled at her and she wanted to cry. He had gobs of chocolate on his face but he was still the most adorable child she'd ever seen.

"Mom, can we please go and see the ducks before we go home?" Blair smiled.

"Absolutely." Blair left some cash on the table as they got up to leave. She grabbed Henry's hand and their bags. As she was putting her wallet away, her phone rang.

Serena. She should have known she'd be getting a call from her "best friend." Blair immediately hit ignore.

She gave her son a big smile. "Okay. Let's go!" As they started their walk down East 60th, Blair started to get an uneasy feeling. And there was a reason.

A limo pulled up along side of them. It suddenly stopped and the back window rolled down. Chuck. He was back from Hong Kong. Blair rolled her eyes.

"Daddy!" Henry ran up to the limo and Chuck opened the door, lifting his son up over his head. "I've missed you, my boy!"

"Mom and I are going to the ducks. Do you want to come with us?" Chuck looked at Blair, whose face had instantly gone from cheerful to glum. "I'd love to," Chuck quickly responded.

"It's Christmas Eve. And the only place I want to be is right here. With my family."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Dan had never slept better. True, it was Christmas Day. And true he didn't really have any place to go for the holidays. He was a refugee sentenced to Nate Archibald's guesthouse. For how long-he had absolutely no idea. He was anything but depressed about it. There were worse places he could be.

As he laid in bed on the most comfortable mattress known to man, a huge grin swept across his face. Asking Serena for a divorce was the best thing he could have possibly done. And it had really been fairly easy. Sure, _she_ was mad. But as for Dan-he simply felt relief.

Dan got up and headed for the shower-which by the way, was a shower he wanted to live in-but first noticed a missed call on his phone. His heart skipped a beat at the thought that it might have been Blair calling him. He was already cursing himself before seeing the missed call was actually from Jenny. Dan quickly hit redial.

Jenny answered on the first ring.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Dan, Dan, the lover man. Joyeux Noel!" Dan found his sister mildly amusing.

"You know, I am just so honored you took time away from trimming Blair's tree to actually call your family on Christmas." Dan wasn't fully prepared for the "zings" Jenny had apparently been patiently waiting to throw his way.

"Jenny, I heard about your conversation with Blair. I'd appreciate it if you would refrain from acting all entertained by the situation. This is not something Blair needs splashed all over the place. You're the only one who knows about this. For the time being, anyway. So your discretion would be appreciated." Dan knew his sister could ultimately be trusted, but it didn't mean she wasn't going to have her fun. "By the way, please don't tell me Dad's anywhere near you while you're having this conversation with me. I'm gonna-"

"Dan. Chillax. He went out for a stroll. I think he's already sick of me." That was a strong possibility, Dan thought to himself.

"Don't worry. I don't have a megaphone. I don't even talk to anyone but Eleanor, though I bet she'd love to know what her only child's been up to. While she's _supposed_ to be meeting with the New York buyers!"

"Jenny!" Dan was getting a little sick of the back and forth. He knew she was just isolated and feeling a bit lonely, and therefore having fun at his expense, but it was already getting old.

She laughed hard into the phone. "Dan! I'm just messing with you. It's fun and it's easy." She took a breath. "But-" Dan could hear Jenny's tone start to change to a more serious one.

"What? What is it?"

"It's just. I never thought you could do something like this to Serena. Have you and Blair even thought about what this would do to her if she finds out? She didn't take it so well the last time you two were involved. And _that _relationship was completely out in the open."

"Jenny." After a careful moment of thought, Dan was now itching to tell her about Serena. "The whole thing with Serena. It's more complicated than Blair and I having an affair. I _am_ in love with Blair. But-"

He could practically see Jenny straightening up in her chaise lounge across the Atlantic. "What, Dan? Come on. Don't leave me hanging! Spill."

"The thing is...Serena. I found out she slept with Nate. A few weeks ago. Before anything even started between Blair and me." There was a long silence on the other end of the phone.

"Oh. Serena..and, and Nate?" Dan rolled his eyes. The hitch in her voice meant one thing. She was still pining for Nate Archibald. Even after all of these years. God their group was so incestuous...

"Sorry." Dan finally answered her. "I forgot that you-"

"What? No I don't." She was protesting a bit too much. "Forget it. It's in the past. Back to the other thing. The Serena cheating thing. Blair didn't tell me about that."

"We just found out." Dan thought he'd better leave out the part where they were hiding in a closet. "This Christmas has already been a real doozy. I guess I probably should have called you yesterday. I asked Serena for a divorce the night before last."

"Really? That was...fast, Dan. God I want to move back to New York. I'm missing so much being in Paris. So what'd she say?"

"Well, she was angry of course. I think her precise words were for me were 'arrogant prick.' Of course I didn't tell her the information I had just found out about _her_."

"Wait, so how'd you find out? About Nate and Serena. Nate told you?" Dan suddenly became distracted when he looked out the window and saw Nate walking towards the guest house. "Hey listen, let me call you back. Nate's walking up this way."

"Nate? You're with Nate _now_? Nate who just slept with Serena. Why are you with Nate? What's going on?" He hated to end the conversation so abruptly but he officially had no choice.

"I'll call you back later."

"Dan!"

"Yeah I know, I really gotta go, though, and I'll explain everything later. Bye!" Dan heard one last tiny shriek from Jenny's lips before pressing the end button. He then practically sprinted up to the front door and opened it before Nate even had a change to knock.

"Hey!" Dan said, a little too enthusiastically. "What's up?" And awkwardly.

"Hey," Nate smiled, still a bit confused at Dan's care free attitude towards him.

"I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am. Again. For all of it. I feel like-"

"Like garbage?" Dan offered. It was kind of a joke.

"Yeah. Exactly." Nate nodded uncomfortably.

Dan shrugged. "Well I know how.._persuasive_ she can be." Dan realized they were still standing inside the door frame. "I'm being rude! You wanna come in or-"

"Oh. No. I was, uh, just about to leave for the city. Spending the day with the folks. Did you want a ride in or...?" It was a good question. Dan officially had no plans today. He could write. However, his laptop was back at the apartment. Perhaps today would be as good a day as any to retrieve some of his things, though. If he was lucky, Serena would be conveniently absent, perhaps spending the day with Lily and of course, William, creepiest father-in-law on the planet.

"Sure. Why not? Maybe I'll go and collect some of my things from the apartment. Thanks, man."

"Hey, no problem. Really, I'm the one who should be thanking you. For being so civil about everything." Dan felt an inkling of guilt watching Nate jump through hoops to keep their friendship in tact, but not guilty enough to fill Nate in on the whole story.

"So uh, I'll let you shower or whatever...oh do you need more clothes?" Dan was still wearing the same set of clothes Nate had sent down yesterday. Dan nodded and gestured to his ensemble. Nate laughed. Dan really wasn't a Polo type of guy. "I'll have Tatiana bring something down. Meet up in an hour?"

"Sounds good." It was already shaping up to be a good day. Only one thing could make it better. For Blair to tell Chuck she was leaving him. It probably wasn't going to happen. But Dan knew that day was fast approaching.

* * *

Blair, still in her bathrobe, glared as Henry hugged Chuck in thanks for the present he had just opened. What the hell was a five year old going to do with a Dunhill wallet and stainless steel money clip? Honestly... She swigged back her second glass of champagne of the morning.

"Now," Chuck announced. "I think it's time to give Mommy her present. It's upstairs. Can you run and go get it for me, Henry?" Blair's eyes narrowed in on Chuck's. She hadn't gotten Chuck anything. Nor did she want anything from him. Henry nodded enthusiastically and immediately sprang up at his father's request. Chuck walked over to where Blair was seated on the couch. She further covered up her legs with her bathrobe in response. She didn't need him getting any ideas. "Blair, I meant what I said at the park yesterday. I want to make things right with us." Blair was quiet as Chuck grabbed her hand, giving it a gentle massage.

"Here, I found it!" Henry announced as he bounded down the stairs. It was a smallish box with a red bow. Blair was starting to feel uncomfortable, as she knew the heft and look of the box meant some type of jewelry. Henry handed it to her and she hesitantly started to unwrap it, all while shooting a smile in her son's direction. The word 'Cartier' appeared. Her instincts had been correct. She opened the box. Inside-a stunning Emerald and diamond necklace. Blair knew her way around a piece of jewelry and this was one impressive piece. Six digits impressive.

Chuck looked on with pride at the piece he had selected. "Here. Let me help you with it." He reached over to grab the necklace and began to arrange it around her neck.

"Thank you so much, Henry!" she exclaimed, trying her best to sound excited. "This is just beautiful." It was a tactical maneuver, conveniently throwing the credit at her son rather than the one who wrote the check for it. Henry beamed back at her. "Daddy picked it. He said he knows just what you like." Blair fidgeted as she felt Chuck's fingers linger a little too long on her collarbone and skim around to the nape of her neck. He knew exactly what he was doing.

When he finally got the necklace clasped, Chuck locked eyes with her. "Stunning," he whispered. He leaned over to kiss her on the cheek. Something Blair would have avoided had their son not been in the room.

"Okay, Henry. Um, why don't we clean up this wrapping paper, and then we need to go and get dressed. I'll take you to brunch at the Plaza." Surprisingly, Henry hopped on his mother's request without giving Blair any lip. He quickly raced around the room collecting the colorful assortment of discarded paper and bows. Chuck turned to look at Blair curiously.

"What? Am I not invited?" He was making an effort not to lose his cool, but Blair knew what was lurking beneath.

Blair shrugged. "I thought I would make it a mother son thing. Start a new tradition." It wasn't said with snark, but she knew that comment would serve to only make him angrier.

"Blair," he said, a bit exasperated. "How long are you going to punish me? I told you I'm sorry. I bought you a fucking nine-hundred thousand dollar necklace."

"I didn't ask you to buy me anything," she responded cooly. "You can take it back if you want." Chuck drew in a breath. He was rapidly losing patience.

"You know? You act like I'm the bad guy here. But you made it pretty clear to me that you've been getting your kicks elsewhere. And though you _are_ prone to embellishment, the fact is we haven't fucked in months." Blair shrugged. It wasn't exactly a denial, but she didn't feel the need to comment. She didn't need to give him any further motivation to sick his private investigator on her.

"So my question is are you still getting serviced elsewhere?"

Chuck waited a moment. When she didn't respond, he reached over and began to work his hand underneath her robe and up the inside of her thigh. She grimaced at the touch. "You know, I've never known your sex drive to just dry up." He let that sink in as he grabbed the champagne glass from her hand and finished it off. "You're really not going to say anything?" He shrugged. "I'll know soon enough, anyway," he said arrogantly." Chuck then slammed the champagne flute down in front of her on the coffee table.

Blair desperately wanted to pull a Dan. Do what he had done the night before last and just ask Chuck for a divorce. Dan would be happy. She would be happy. Who cared about Chuck? He would be free to whore it up with whoever, whenever and wherever he pleased. But something felt off about the timing. Christmas Day. When she was about to take her little boy out for brunch. She would feel like the most horrible mother in the world to dampen the day with a divorce announcement. Her mind drifted to a Thanksgiving almost a decade earlier, right after her parents had divorced. She had been gutted when her father failed to show up for "their" holiday. She couldn't do that to her child.

"I have to go get dressed," Blair announced quietly as she stood up from the couch. Chuck's hand fell away. "Join us for brunch. If you want." It was all she could muster as she turned away and slowly ascended the stairs.

* * *

The red Lamborghini was going just a wee bit too fast for Dan's tastes. He gripped the support handle with both hands as Nate navigated the streets of Manhattan. Nate laughed in amusement. "Hey, you don't mind if we make a quick stop at the Basses before I drop you off at your place, do you? I just don't want to have to double back." Did Dan mind? He wasn't sure. But as far as Nate knew, he had no reason to _not_ want to stop by the Basses' apartment.

"Yeah, that's fine," Dan stuttered. "Just to say 'Merry Christmas' or what?" Dan wanted to start preparing himself now.

"Yeah." Nate gestured to the back of the car where a few exquisitely wrapped Christmas gifts sat. "I was able to acquire this vintage of Dom that Chuck wants to give to Blair. 1995. Twenty-grand."

"Oh, it's um...it's a gift for Blair?" Dan swallowed hard, hoping his sudden insecurity would wash its way down the old gullet. The thought of Chuck giving Blair anything made Dan cringe. He didn't want Chuck to somehow work his way back into her good graces. Dan had been burned before. And even though the circumstances were now different-_much_ different-he still couldn't help but feel a bit insecure.

Nate pulled into the parking garage at Chuck and Blair's building. The deck was pretty much empty. Apparently everyone in this building left the city for the holidays. Nate pulled Chuck's Dom from the back. He opened the vertically rotating door and hopped out. Dan remained in his seat. Nate gave him a confused look through the window. "Aren't you gonna get out?" Nate yelled, his face close to the glass, not realizing he didn't have to scream for Dan to hear him.

Dan sharply exhaled. He didn't want to see Chuck Bass, and he definitely didn't want to see Chuck Bass playing house with Blair. Nate shrugged with confusion and continued to wait. Finally, Dan jiggled the door handle. It suddenly sprung open and he gave Nate the thumbs up sign.

Dan later tried to explain. "I'm from Brooklyn. Those Lamborghini doors are a little difficult to negotiate." Nate patted him on the back as he rang for the elevator. Dan looked around. This building was where he had married Serena. Another reason he hadn't wanted to come here.

Minutes later, they walked out of the elevator and into Blair and Chuck's apartment. Chuck, looking even more dour than usual met them on arrival. He was dressed now, holding a tumbler of Scotch in one hand. Because _that_ was certainly acceptable at eleven o'clock in the morning. "Merry Christmas," he announced less than enthusiastically. "Humphrey." It was an acknowledgement. Not a greeting.

"What's up with you, man?" Nate asked, showing concern as he always did for his best friend since grade school. Chuck led them into the living room. From upstairs, a shout was heard. Henry was apparently having some sort of argument with Blair.

The sound of "I don't want to wear a suit on Christmas!" wafted from upstairs. Dan wasn't sure how Blair put up with it. Nate gave Chuck an amused look before making a crack. "Well now, there's a little chip off the old block." Chuck cut his eyes at his best friend.

"It's just brunch. What kid wants to wear a suit on Christmas?" Chuck took another sip. "He'll probably spill something on it. Then Blair will spend the whole time dabbing and blotting."

Dan knew he should probably refrain from comment, but...

"Well, you know, it can be nice to get dressed up for certain occasions. Brunch on Christmas Day would certainly qualify." He instantly found himself on the receiving end of a Chuck Bass glare down.

Chuck then shook his head and scoffed. "It's obvious you don't have kids, Humphrey." Well. That stung.

Dan knew when the time came he would be an amazing father. Better than Chuck in every category. Dan had Milo in his life for a brief amount of time. It was enough time to know he had an affinity for fatherhood. He had been there for Blair through her first pregnancy. He had even been ready to run away with her. Then she miscarried and they never spoke of it again. He could only assume Blair found the subject too painful.

Dan sometimes wondered if she ever thought about how different her life might have been had she given birth to Louis' baby. He also wondered if she ever thought about having any more kids. Specifically, kids with Dan.

"You're right, Chuck. I don't have kids. Maybe someday," was all Dan chose to say. Chuck surveyed Dan closely. They had never been exactly close, though they had hung out together on occasion during some weird social experiments.

"Well what's stopping you? Maybe you and Serena need to just bite the bullet. After all, children are a blessing." Chuck said this a little too deliberately and Dan wasn't sure what to make of the statement. It almost felt like a challenge. "By the way Humphrey, why are you accompanying Nate on his 'errands' and not at home stuffing Serena's Christmas stocking?" Nate quickly jumped in.

"Dan spent some time writing and hanging out in Long Island with me. I'm just about to drop him off." It wasn't really surprising that Serena had yet to divulge the divorce news to her stepbrother.

"Writers need a change of scenery, sometimes," Dan added.

That answer seemed to satisfy Chuck. The sound of footsteps on the stairs captured their attention and all three turned to watch as Blair led Henry down. She did a quick double take at the sight of Dan standing in her living room.

"Nate. Humphrey. Merry Christmas." Blair was dressed for brunch now, and had somehow gotten Henry into his suit. Dan instantly caught sight of the massive Emerald necklace hanging around Blair's neck. Holy shit.

Dan had gotten Blair's Christmas present a couple of weeks ago, right around the time they had consummated their affair. He figured he would be sitting on it for a while. It was an early print edition of Anna Karenina, published in original Russian. Dan had stowed it away at the loft in Brooklyn. In no way could it compete with the extravagance of a fucking Emerald and diamond necklace, though. He had never resented Chuck more than in that moment.

"So where are you guys going to brunch?" Nate asked. Leave it to Nate to try and keep this awkward encounter going.

"The Plaza," Blair answered quickly. "And we probably need to be heading out," she said bluntly. She looked over to Chuck. "Can you call the driver around? We'll meet you downstairs." Chuck gave a quick nod. As she passed him by, Dan caught the scent of Blair's Chanel. He swallowed hard as he instantly flashed back to their recent adventure at Nate's, huddled together in the guest house closet.

"You guys have fun. Don't eat too much, little man," Nate called out to Henry. Henry promptly ignored him.

Nate then turned his attention to Chuck. "Guess we'll let you get to it, then. I'll give you a call later." Chuck raised his glass in the air. He seemed to miss the knowing look Nate gave to Dan as they made their way onto the waiting elevator.

As they stepped inside, Nate turned to Dan. "I think something's going on with those two."

Brilliant observation, Nate.

* * *

Lily poured a cup of tea for Serena and set it before her on the kitchen counter. She immediately pushed it away. "Serena, sitting here moping isn't going to do you any good. I think what you need is to get out of this apartment. A little fresh air. Maybe get some food in your system?" Serena's eyes were red and her skin was blotchy. Her hair hadn't been brushed in two days and she was wearing a fuzzy pink bathrobe.

"Okay. Well then _I_ would like to get some fresh air and food in _my _system. And I'm not going to leave you here to wallow. So I am going to insist that you walk into that bedroom and find something presentable to wear." Lily had never been a sensitive parent, but why did this have to be about her?

Serena sighed out of exhaustion. She hadn't slept since Dan had asked her for a divorce. Now her mother was being less than sympathetic. Although for someone who was on her...was it sixth marriage, what could she really expect? All Serena wanted to do was to curl up into a ball. And maybe drink a bottle of Absolut.

As painfully slowly as she could, Serena rose from her chair and made her way to the bedroom she had shared with Dan up until two days ago. She strolled over to her closet. Serena grabbed the first thing she saw and tossed it on-leggings and an oversized turtleneck sweater. She also grabbed the largest pair of sunglasses she had. She didn't even bother with makeup before walking back into the living room where Lily was flipping through a magazine.

"Well, that's a start." Lily shrugged as she grabbed her purse and started to guide her daughter out the door.

Nate pulled up to Dan's building. Dan gave an apprehensive look out the window, his eyes drifting up to his apartment.

"Nervous?" Nate quipped. "You're just gonna have to suck it up, Dan." Dan knew Nate was right. He just wasn't one for confrontation. "Listen, if you want to spend the day with the Archibalds, the offer still stands." Dan sat in silence, reflecting for a moment. Having seen Blair in her home, living her life, had just jolted him. Dan wanted that to be them.

Just them. Together. No longer having to deal with Serena or Chuck. Just living in the city. Going to museums and movies and doing whatever they felt like doing.

"Thanks, man. But you're probably right. I just need to-" Before he could finish, Nate tapped him on the arm.

"Hey, check it out." Dan looked up to see Serena and Lily entering a limo. Serena's hair was now pulled back into a bun. Dan noticed the oversized pair of sunglasses she was wearing on a gray and cloudy day.

"Perfect timing," Nate said and Dan nodded. Dan waited until the limo pulled out before popping open his door.

"Hey, um. Do you think you can-would you mind waiting for me?" Dan fumbled his words. Nate nodded. "Absolutely."

"I won't be long. Just going to get the essentials." He paused. "And Christmas with the Archibalds sounds great." Nate gave his friend an encouraging smile as Dan quickly leapt out of the car. He entered the building with great trepidation, even though he knew Serena was gone. Luckily Vanya wasn't manning the door today. Dan was sure he'd probably heard the divorce news by now, or if he hadn't he'd know soon enough.

Ten minutes later Dan was back in the Lamborghini, having grabbed his laptop and as many clothes and shoes as he could fit into two suitcases. "Thanks, Nate. I appreciate your doing this for me. And I really appreciate you giving me a place to stay. But I think rather than going back to Long Island tonight, I'm going to go back to Brooklyn. When you start to head back later, you think you can drop me off at the loft?"

* * *

Blair dipped her napkin into her glass of ice water and leaned over her son. Two minutes into their meal and she was already scrubbing Hollandaise off of Henry's new Ralph Lauren dress shirt.

"If you would sit up straight and not slouch, things wouldn't spill." Blair had been on edge since her discussion with Chuck earlier, but her run in with Dan had just propelled her anxiety to another level. But it was also an adrenaline rush. Having her lover and her husband in the same room would have that effect on anyone.

Chuck watched Blair between his bites of lobster and waffles. His meeting with his private detective couldn't come soon enough. He didn't know this Blair. This Blair seemed to be stoic. She didn't bite back when he tried to incite her. It was like she was resigned to the fact that he would never change-almost like she had already moved on. He was preparing himself to hear the "D" word fall out of her mouth some time soon, though he would fight it as hard as he could. He would let Blair walk away from this marriage over his dead body.

"Okay. I think we got it. Yech, all that butter. Hopefully, it won't set now." Blair took a sip of her second Bellini of the meal and stabbed at a piece of melon. She made quick eye contact with Chuck before focusing her attention back on her fruit plate. She knew he'd been watching her and her stomach was now in knots.

"Can I please have a strawberry, Mom?" Blair quickly took two strawberries from her plate and passed them on to Henry's.

"When are Eleanor and Cyrus getting to town?" Chuck was determined to get some spousal conversation going.

"I don't know," Blair replied, disinterestedly. "I guess I'll call her when we get home." She had managed to answer him without even looking up at him. Chuck's attention was suddenly pulled at the sight of Lily and Serena standing in the Palm Court entrance. Blair followed his gaze to the mother and daughter waiting to be seated for brunch. Blair rolled her eyes. Just what this day needed. She grabbed her Bellini and watched as Chuck got up and worked his way over to them.

"Mother." Serena was more than a little peeved. "Palm Court? When you said brunch I really thought we could go some place a little more under the radar. Like Cafe Kristall or Public."

"Serena, did you really want to go all the way to Soho? I know you're depressed right now but that doesn't mean we have to eat Austrian food on Christmas Day. And you can lose the sunglasses. No one knows a thing here about your personal situation so you might as well face the public while you still can." Lily could be so uplifting.

Serena raised her sunglasses and let them rest atop her head. She did a quick scan of the room. She blinked as she spotted Chuck. Her initial instinct was to step behind one of the palm trees but it was too late. Chuck was rapidly moving in their direction. Lily smiled in surprise as she caught sight of her son.

"Lily, Serena. I didn't expect to see you two here today."

"Hello, Charles!" Lily sang out, leaning over to give him a kiss on each cheek. "What a nice surprise." Lily looked over to Serena. Serena always felt like Lily preferred her adopted son to her own flesh and blood.

Serena forced a smile and did her best to play along, but Chuck knew something was amiss from the moment he spotted them.

"You know, it's funny," Chuck said. "I just said goodbye to Nate and Dan. They stopped by the apartment. Apparently Dan's been staying with Nate?" Serena looked down at the floor.

Lily cocked her head to one side and looked at her daughter. "Perhaps you just need to tell him, Serena," she prodded.

"Tell me what?" Chuck stepped in closer, growing increasingly concerned. It was clear Serena was put out with her mother as she crossed her arms tightly against her body.

Lily couldn't help herself. "Charles, unfortunately a couple of days ago Dan asked Serena for a divorce."

"MOM!" Serena was officially furious and Chuck was confused. That was the last news he had expected to hear. That asshole had just been in his apartment pretending that nothing was wrong. He had even gotten Nate to lie for him. Chuck couldn't believe it. Dan and Serena always seemed so...so stable. Boring, yes. But stable. Quite the opposite of him and Blair where drama had shadowed their relationshp from day one.

"Now Serena, there is no shame in divorce," Lily said calmly. She would know.

"Well, I'm truly sorry to hear about this. You must join us at our table," Chuck insisted. "We're just right over there." Blair saw Chuck pointing in her direction from the corner of her eye. That bastard was inviting Serena and Lily to dine with them. Fuck _him._

"Oh! My grandson, there he is!" Serena bit her lip. Her mother referring to Blair's son as her "grandson" was gag worthy. It was also another stark reminder of how Dan had insulted her, shooting down Serena's desire to start a family with him.

Lily was delighted and accepted the offer without hesitation. "Of course we'll join you."

A few minutes later, Lily was regaling the table of how Eric used to cry at the sight of anyone with a white beard and mustache. Any time of the year-not just Christmas.

"So he was afraid of Santa?" Henry asked innocently.

"I'm afraid so." Lily smiled down at the youngster seated in her lap as she took a sip of coffee. "I wish he could be with us today, but at least he's getting to visit with William. Eric is just so selfless. Choosing to teach children in Kenya. I'm so proud of him." Again, Serena couldn't help but feel a little slighted by her mother's comments.

"I made a donation to the school he's teaching at," Chuck suddenly bragged.

"Oh, that is so sweet, Charles." Serena noticed how distant Blair seemed. From the looks of the empty glasses on the table, Blair seemed to be on her third Bellini. And Serena knew the Waldorfs always celebrated with champagne on Christmas morning, a tradition Blair no doubt continued as a Bass. So who knew exactly how loaded she was. Blair sat with a serviceable smile on her face, but made no real attempt to join in the conversation. She knew Blair was probably still ticked off with her. Ignoring her phone calls had kind of been a tip off. But could she not put aside her feelings for one day?

The server arrived and placed their food before them-French toast for Lily and an omelet for Serena-Serena took the opportunity to engage Blair in conversation.

"So, Blair, I called you yesterday. Left you a message." Blair turned to look at Serena.

"Really? I didn't see any messages," Blair lied. "The service in this city-" Serena rolled her eyes. She knew Blair had gotten her message.

"That's so strange. Because I don't recall you ever having phone issues before." Serena started to aggressively cut her omelet and Blair smirked as Chuck and Lily looked on. They'd seen this kind of passive aggressive behavior before. It was classic Serena and Blair.

Blair daintily dabbed her mouth with a napkin. If Serena really wanted to challenge her, Blair had no problem obliging her.

"Well. Tell me now, then," Blair smiled insincerely.

"What?" Serena asked as she took a sip of orange juice.

"What. was. the message?" she asked slowly and deliberately. She was officially engaging Serena now. Serena's attack had backfired. She had only wanted to make the point that Blair wasn't returning her calls. The point that Blair was rude, petulant, and bitchy. She hadn't really wanted to broach the subject of her impending divorce. Yesterday, she had reached out to her best friend for support. That was before, however. If this was how Blair was going to act, well, Serena was grateful that she hadn't been able to reach her.

"I was just calling to wish you a Merry Christmas," Serena quickly lied before shoving down a mouthful of eggs. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until now.

"Oh? That's it? Well, Merry Christmas to you, too." The sarcasm wasn't lost on Chuck or Serena, and Blair realized she might have slightly slurred her 's' sounds on the word, "Christmas." She didn't care. She needed alcohol if she was going have to continue to endure this meal. Blair waved at the waiter to bring her another Bellini, and Chuck gave her a disapproving look. Serena rolled her eyes. Lily fed Henry a bite of her French toast.

But Blair wasn't done. "You can slow down there, Serena. You are _sucking_..." she took a long pause. "Those eggs down like a vacuum." Blair snorted at her double entendre and Lily gave Chuck a concerned look. Serena continued to eat, choosing to ignore the comment.

Lily then turned to face Blair, in an attempt to smooth out the converation. "Blair, that's a lovely necklace. Is it new?" Blair looked down. She forgot that she was even wearing it. "Oh. Yes. This was my baby's Christmas present to me." She smiled at her son and Henry giggled.

"Well it's very beautiful. I'm sure he had some help in picking it out, though?" Lily offered, trying to get Chuck some credit. Blair simply shrugged and an irritated Chuck pushed his plate away. The silent exchange wasn't lost on Lily or Serena.

"I have to go to the bathroom," Henry suddenly whined, and not a second too soon. Chuck started to get up, but Lily stopped him. "Oh, no. Let me. You stay." As she got up, she pointed at Henry and whispered loudly enough for the entire table to hear, "I might have to take this one home with me tonight. There are a few presents from Santa that somehow got left at my house by mistake." Chuck smiled and nodded. "We'll see."

"Take him! You just take him!" Blair blurted out, probably a little too loudly. Lily didn't seem to hear or was simply choosing to ignore her. Probably the latter. Blair watched as Lily whisked her son towards the restrooms before directing her attention back to Serena.

"Now, I didn't want to say anything in front of your mother, but you look like hell." Blair was officially on a roll now and slurring even more. "Then again, she does have eyes-"

"Blair-" Chuck scolded and Blair scoffed in response. "What? Are you my father?" What she really wanted was for someone to share Serena's divorce news with her. These people simply wouldn't indulge her so she would have to take matters into her own hands.

"So?" Blair looked around as if searching for someone. "Where is your husband? Hmm? Where could Dan be?" She then pretended to look under the table and smiled. She looked Serena in the eye. "Did you know I just saw him? Your husband? He was just at my house. In _my_ living room." It almost sounded suggestive as Blair raised her eyebrows to emphasize her point. She picked up her glass and sucked down the last of her drink. She leaned in over the table, resting her head on one hand. "He was with Nate. Have you seen Nate lately?"

Chuck studied Blair closely. She was obviously mocking Serena. That much was obvious. But her comments were curious. Were they merely a manifestation of her inebriated state, or was she trying to tell everyone she knew about Dan and Serena's breakup? And what was were those comments about Nate about?

Serena gulped and gently set her fork down. She looked at Chuck, seemingly thinking the same exact thing. She turned back to look at Blair. "Blair, you may want to ease up on the Bellinis." As if on cue, the waiter served Blair her drink. She smiled sweetly at the waiter. Chuck reached over the table and pulled it out of her reach.

"Hey, what the hell do you think you're doing?" Blair yelled.

"Trying to help you stave off future embarrassment." Chuck inhaled deeply and looked over at Serena. "I think I'm going to have to-"

"Go." Serena advised him. Blair had some choice words coming her way at some point, but right now all she wanted was to finish her Christmas omelet in peace. Chuck nodded as he place his napkin on the table. He walked around and pulled a protesting Blair out of her chair. "Tell Lily I'll pack a bag for Henry. Drop it off later tonight," he said over his shoulder. Serena nodded. She watched as he ushered Blair out the door before grabbing the abandoned Bellini and taking a large swig.

* * *

Blair was quiet and sullen as the limo hit traffic along Fifth Avenue. Chuck rubbed his eyes. It was barely noon. He watched his wife as she combed through her purse, searching for her compact. She sighed in frustration as it failed to reveal itself.

"Blair. What was that back there?" Chuck wanted answers.

She looked up calmly. "I'm afraid you'll have to be more specific, Chuck." She seemed to have sobered up a bit as she started to shake her purse around in her lap.

"Do you know about Serena and Dan?"

"Of course I do," she shot back quickly.

"I got the impression Serena hadn't shared-"

"I didn't hear it from Serena." Blair cut him off. She looked up, her eyes piercing into his. "I don't know what you're insinuating, or why you even care where I get my information on Serena's marital status, but you do realize I work with Jenny Humphrey. Serena's soon to be ex sister in law?" Chuck nodded. His suspicions that somehow Dan had been confiding in his wife drifted away. Blair continued to reach in her bag, feeling around at the bottom.

"Do you want me to help you find something?" Chuck asked, getting a little irritation at the commotion Blair was creating from her side of the seat. Blair ignored him as she started to roughly throw random things from her bag. Eyeliner. Phone. Mascara. Mints. Phone. Chuck eyed the items curiously.

"Blair. Why do you have two phones?" Blair got a sinking feeling when she realized what she had just done. She didn't miss a beat, however. "This one is Melinda's work phone," she explained, pointing to the newer phone. She left it at the atelier."

"Should we stop off and return it to her?" Chuck offered. Blair looked up at him.

"She's in Miami." Blair responded almost a little too quickly. "Probably left it here on purpose so I'd have no way of getting in touch with her to yell at her about all the shit she failed to do before leaving town. More on me. As usual." Chuck watched as Blair finally found what she was looking for-a gold plated compact. She checked herself in the compact mirror, then powdered her nose and removed a stray eyelash from her face. She snapped it shut then turned to look at her husband.

"You didn't have to grab me like that, Chuck. I'm not even drunk!" she said angrily.

"That's something a drunk person would say, Blair." He watched her curiously for a moment. He liked it when she was feisty like this. A little drunk. Angry with Serena. The angrier the better. It always made for a better fuck. Chuck scooted in a bit closer to her in order to test the waters. He calmly placed his hand along her thigh, sliding it under her skirt and upwards towards her center. So far so good. Chuck bit his lip in anticipation. She wouldn't dare turn him down in a limo. He quickly leaned in for a kiss, just managing to taste the peach and Prosecco combination on her lips. She quickly pulled back.

"I don't think so, Chuck." She roughly shoved his hand away and Chuck ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.

"Dammit, Blair!" Chuck said as he slammed his fist against the seat. "Just tell me what I have to do!"

Blair rang up to the driver. "Let me out here, please," she requested calmly.

"You're not in any condition to walk home, Blair."

"And yet in this condition, you have no problem trying to get me to fuck you in the back of this limo. Anyway, I'm not going home. I'm staying at the penthouse, tonight."

"Blair, don't do this. We need to talk this through." Indeed they did. However, she'd had enough of him for one day.

Chuck watched as Blair escaped his grasp and stepped out onto Fifth Avenue. He watched her as she disappeared into the distance.

Chuck quickly pulled his phone out.

"What are you doing later?"

* * *

"Thanks again for letting me partake in your Christmas festivities, Mrs. Archibald. Captain." Anne Archibald smiled her best faux smile at Nate's plus one. She had managed to steer clear of any questions regarding Serena, though she'd been itching to ask.

"Yes, well it was our pleasure. Any friend of Nate's..." As Dan and Nate said their final goodbyes, Dan felt his phone buzz. He checked the screen. It was "Blair's" number. There was no way he was going to answer that here, so he let the call go to voicemail. A few seconds later, a text appeared.

_WHERE R U?!_

Blair was texting him on Christmas night. And not just texting him. Text _screaming_. It was like the bat signal. Dan quickly shot her a text back as Nate grabbed their coats.

"The Archibalds. U?" Her response came quickly.

"Pentshouse. I can't digger out where my car is."

Yeah, she was drunk.

"You ready, man?" Nate peered out from behind the hall closet door.

"Um..you know what? I think I should probably just take a cab over to the loft. No need for you to go out of your way on my behalf."

"Really? Well, that's cool. I guess I have time to stop by and see Chuck after all, then. He called earlier while you were on the phone with Rufus. Apparently he and Blair _are_ having problems. And I guess something happened between Serena and Blair at brunch? I didn't really understand that part."

Nate suddenly remembered that he had a gift for Dan. "Oh I have your present in the car."

"My present? You got me something?" Dan was touched. He was also feeling a bit guilty at not having gotten Nate anything. "I didn't-"

"Please," Nate's voice lowered so his parents wouldn't hear. "Let's just say that after what I'm about to give you, we're even okay?" Dan wasn't sure what that meant but it sounded ominous.

He followed Nate out to his car. After helping Dan pull out his luggage, Nate quickly reached for one of the gift boxes of champagne.

"Here, I was able to get a good deal on a Dom Rose 2002. So here." Dan laughed. He wasn't really a champagne drinker, but whatever.

"Thanks a lot man. Honestly. This is really generous."

Nate laughed. "Oh, wait. That wasn't the real gift." For once, Dan was the one giving a confused look. He watched as Nate reached underneath his seat and pulled out a square wooden box. Unwrapped. He handed it to Dan. Dan looked at it curiously.

"Um. Okay." Dan carefully removed the lid. Tucked inside was a a glass bong and what had to be at least a pound of weed.

Dan looked up in surprise at Nate. "Holy-"

"I know, right? Have fun." Dan prayed that there were no cops in the vicinity. He would be looking at five years.

"Oh, hey, are you going to be at Eleanor's for New Year's?" Dan had to admire how quickly Nate had changed the subject. "I know it might be weird if Serena was gonna be there. But since she and Blair are fighting and all she probably won't even come. It might be fun for you to get out. Even if it is with fashion people."

"I didn't even know Eleanor was throwing a party." It was strange that Blair hadn't mentioned anything. Dan didn't think Eleanor had ever really been a fan of his dating Blair, but she never said anything. It was just the looks she gave him. She had been a little put out after Blair ran off with him during her wedding reception. But she _did _come to his wedding to Serena. So there was that.

"Well, give me a call. Let me know. Maybe we can do dinner beforehand?" Dan nodded as Nate walked back around to the driver's side. He gave Dan one last wave before hopping in and peeling out into the street. Dan watched as the Lamborghini disappeared into the night. There he was standing in the street with two suitcases, his laptop, a bottle of Dom, and the largest stash of weed he had ever laid eyes on.

"Taxi!"

* * *

An aggravated Blair threw her phone down on the bed in her old bedroom. She had texted Dan a good twenty minutes ago and he hadn't texted her back again. Her face was flushed from a full day of drinking. Her mind was groggy and she was feeling no pain as she curled up in her old bed, wearing a revealing soft pink lace-trim satin slip. She was still wearing the Emerald necklace, mostly because she was having trouble with the clasp. She had to admit, though, it did look amazing on her.

Blair was thinking about just calling it a night and posting the day in the history books when her phone suddenly buzzed.

_I'm in the lobby. Call down to the door man so I can come up._

A smile crept on her face. Two minutes later Dan appeared in the Waldorf foyer, along with his luggage.

"I'm here to help you, 'digger out where you put your car.' Whatever that means."

He hadn't even had time to set everything down before he caught sight of the obscene necklace that was still draped around Blair's neck. Before he could say anything about it, Blair was suddenly jumping into his arms and throwing him off balance. Dan got instantly hard when he saw what she was wearing.

"Whoa, I-Blair." In an instant Blair's lips were on him and her arms were draped around his neck and Dan's heart was nearly beating out of his chest. He believed he could taste nearly everything she had drunk that day and she tasted delicious. Like Peaches and sugar. Blair pulled away upon seeing the Champagne bottle and the curious box Dan had set on the entryway table. She was more interested in the Champagne.

"You brought Dom?" Blair purred. She walked over and grabbed the bottle.

"Open it," she said, shoving it at him. It was a command from his Queen.

"Really? You want to drink this now?" He thought he'd tease her a bit. "It _is_ already chilled, I guess. It _was_ in Nate's car all day." Dan took off his coat and proceeded to unbutton the first couple of buttons on his shirt in an attempt to make himself more comfortable. Blair watched in wonder. "But judging from your texts, and from the way your mouth tastes, you're kind of already drunk."

Blair's mouth opened wide in objection. Before she could speak, Dan lifted up his hand to run his thumb over her one rosy cheek and her pouty lips.

"Maybe I'll just go and place this in the fridge," he winked. Blair pouted as Dan walked off in the direction of the kitchen. She quickly followed behind him, running on her tiptoes. She watched him curiously as he went to open the refrigerator door. But he suddenly stopped.

"You know, on the other hand...I'm suddenly feeling a bit parched." Dan turned around to face Blair. He shut the refrigerator door closed and leaned back against it. Blair could feel her breathing accelerate as she watched him cling to the bottle in his hands.

"Are you thirsty, Blair?" Blair bit her lip and watched Dan work off the foil wrapper. He then worked to remove the wire cage, just like a pro, keeping his thumb atop the cork. Dan then reached for a towel, working the cork up. Blair could practically already taste the sweet liquid. "I'll grab some flutes."

"Wait." Blair turned around, confused at his command. She suddenly heard the "whoof" of the cork popping open and it left her breathless. Blair watched as Dan discarded the towel and the cork, and slowly brought the bottle up to his lips. He took a good long swig. Blair blinked slowly at the sight. Drinking Dom from the bottle was just wrong.

He offered up the bottle to Blair and she took a slow step towards him. As she reached out to grab it from him, he held it out of her reach and grabbed her arm instead, bringing her in to rest against his chest. She let out a tiny squeal. "Dan!" Blair protested.

Dan relented and placed the bottle at her lips, allowing her a tiny sip. She licked her lips in thanks.

"Now, let's talk about what you're wearing."

Blair looked down. "They're my pajamas," Blair said innocently.

"That's debatable," Dan replied as he leaned into her, running his fingers along her collarbone, and dotting tiny kisses around the now infamous Emerald necklace and at the tops of her breasts. Blair sighed at the feeling. Dan pulled up and Blair immediately frowned. "Why are you stopping?" she whined.

"So tell me. How was brunch?" Dan laughed and Blair rolled her eyes. He was killing her. She grabbed the bottle back from his grip. As she was about to take another swig, Dan tipped the bottle over, causing the liquid to spill down her lips and dribble down her chin.

"Whoops." Blair was temporarily furious until Dan leaned over to lick the sweet liquid from her chin, making it all better. He worked his tongue upwards until he once again caught her mouth with his own, sucking and massaging and he felt her lips begin to swell. Blair pulled away this time. She went to work unbuttoning the rest of his shirt and Dan helped her remove it the rest of the way. Blair playfully grabbed the bottle back again. Dan watched as Blair tipped it over, the liquid flowing down his pecs and drizzling down over his well toned abs. Blair set the bottle down on the counter behind him leaned in to lick his chest. Dan gripped the counter at the feel of her talented little tongue working it's way down and back up again, licking him clean.

"Blair..." Dan breathed her name. She had started to remove his belt now, and was also working on getting his shoes and pants off. Dan was as hard as he could possibly be, and he had to give himself a quick stroke and give himself some relief.

"Dan," Blair whispered. "Meet me in the dining room." He watched as she walked away from him, admiring her toned legs and delectable ass. Champagne bottle still in hand. She turned one last time to give him a 'come hither' look as she disappeared from his sight.

Dan waited as long as he could-which wasn't long at all-before coming after her. He worked his way towards the dining room, his heart beating rapidly in anticipation. He found Blair sitting atop the dining room table, legs crossed at the ankles. She smiled at him as she took another swig. Drunk, horny Blair was a force to be reckoned with.

"Can you do me a favor, Humphrey?" she asked innocently. Dan had a feeling he already knew what she was about to ask.

"What is that, Blair?"

"Can you come over here and take my slip off of me." Dan slowly walked over to her and helped her slide the thin fabric over her head. He threw it on the floor. She now sat before him in only a pair of lacy pink panties and an Emerald necklace.

"Is that all you needed?" Dan asked quizzically.

Blair shook her head no and handed the bottle of champagne to him. He gladly accepted it.

"I'm about to lie down on this table. After I do that, I'm going to need you to pour this champagne all over my body." Dan's breath hitched as he watched Blair lay her body across Eleanor Waldorf's very expensive dining room table. She then closed her eyes. He watched as she ran her hands over her breast, palming and squeezing her nipples. She then bit her lip and let out a tiny groan. This was a fantasy coming to life.

Dan took a breath and lifted the bottle high in the air before tilting it over. He watched as a tiny splash fell between her breasts. She let out another groan and moved her arms up above her head so he could properly saturate her. Dan took the hint. He went even bigger this time, pouring a steady stream of liquid over her and completely drenching her breasts. She sighed and Dan moved in on top of her, licking her breasts clean. He began to palm one while he licked the nipple of the other one. Champagne still in hand, Dan began to pour again...

This time the liquid ran down her stomach, filling up her belly button. Dan pulled the edge of her panties down to let some of the liquid flow inside them. He braced himself for the reaction and watched as she bucked her hips up. She let out a meek "Yeah."

Dan began to rub the liquid into Blair's stomach then leaned in to suck up the liquid that had come to rest inside her belly button. She squirmed at the touch of his tongue. He continued to lick and kiss his way over her body. He squeezed and massaged with his free hand while still gripping the bottle. Out of breath, Blair propped herself up on her elbows to watch as Dan pulled her panties down the rest of the way with one hand, then roughly spread her legs apart. She giggled as she watched him empty the rest of the bottle over her already slick pussy. She was aching for him now as she made eye contact with him. She watched in fascination as Dan leaned down and took a quick lick inside of her. Her hips bucked slowly at the touch of his tongue and she let out a moan. Dan went down for more, holding her in place now as he worked her folds. Inside out. Outside in. As he worked her, she continued to rub residual liquid over her breasts and stomach, moaning as she did.

With no warning whatsoever, Dan pulled Blair's ass to the edge of the table. He shoved his boxers down and pushed his cock inside of her and she easily took him in. Blair squealed and bit Dan's shoulder in retaliation. He stared into her eyes as their hips begin to rock together easily and the feel of the sticky sweet liquid had begun to burn with the heat between them. She latched on to his perfectly toned arms for dear life.

"Fuck. Yes Dan. Fuck yes." Blair scream laughed, her head tilting back. Her knees were clinched around his waist as he continued to pound into her mercilessly. He could feel her walls begin to tighten around him. She was tight and felt perfect around his dick. No one had ever felt more perfect.

"Yeah..yeah...oh God, Dan.." she mewled before finally coming with a chain of expletives. He worked her a little longer and she continued to buck her hips for him before he finally came harder than he ever had in his life. He stayed inside of her and she grabbed his hair and pulled him in for an emotional kiss.

"Jesus Christ, Blair. That-"

"I know." Blair said, breathing heavily as she worked her way down from her orgasm.

"I can't believe we just fucked on your mother's dining room table," Dan said between breaths. He leaned in to kiss her again and smiled. He mouth still tasted of peaches. "So how much alcohol have you had today?" he grinned. Blair didn't respond and was now fighting to keep her eyes open as she leaned back on the table.

A lot apparently. Dan grabbed Blair's slip from off of the floor and placed it back over her head, sliding it back down over her body. He put his boxers back on before lifting Blair up off the table and carrying her towards the stairs and up to her childhood room.

He laid Blair down on the thick down comforter and placed a tender kiss on her forehead. Her hair was sticky. Her mouth was sticky. Hell everything was sticky and she opened her eyes slightly.

"I love you, Dan," she whispered before she passed out again. Dan just watched her for a while before falling asleep next to her.

* * *

Chuck took a hit then passed the joint on to Nate. "And you're sure Blair wasn't at your Christmas party?" Nate didn't know what Chuck was hoping to accomplish exactly. They'd been through this already.

"Uh, I think I know what Blair looks like. Trust me. She wasn't there."

Chuck shook his head in frustration. "Well all I know is that Blair supposedly got back from Paris the day before Christmas Eve. But nobody saw her. Not the door man. Not Dorota. She then met up with Dorota on Christmas Eve. That's when I picked Henry and Blair up from Serendipity. So there was basically a whole day she was unaccounted for." Nate passed him back the joint and Chuck took another long hit.

"Dude, you know you sound paranoid right? And that stuff," Nate gestured to the joint, "is definitely not helping."

"Dulls the pain."

Chuck ran his finger through his hair. "So why exactly was Humphrey staying with you again?" He grabbed his Scotch. "And don't try to feed me that 'he was working on his writing' bullshit again."

"Because he and Serena split up," Nate replied simply.

"Okay," Chuck nodded. "I get that they split up. What I'm wondering is why Dan Humphrey decided to ask Serena for a divorce at _your_ Christmas party. Timing seems a little strange."

Nate shrugged. "I don't know. Guess he just got sick of her shenanigans." He laughed at his use of the word "shenanigans." He said it again. "Shenanigans."

"She had laid into him pretty good for disappearing on her during the party. Maybe he just couldn't take it anymore." Nate took another hit.

"What do you mean he 'disappeared?'" Chuck asked quizzically.

"Oh, Serena wanted to introduce him to some people and he was nowhere to be found."

"Doesn't sound like Serena to get pissed so easily. How long was he gone exactly?"

Nate shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe an hour? It was more of a geriatric crowd this year without you and Blair there. I told him he could go hang out in the guest house. But I guess I had locked it and he couldn't get in. So he just wandered the property for awhile." Chuck was starting to get an uneasy feeling.

"You know, I can't help but feel for the guy," Nate continued. "I mean, even after he found about...well, you know-"

"About you and Serena fucking at yet another wedding?" Nate nodded.

Chuck cocked his head as if something had just occurred to him. "When exactly did he find out about that?"

"Stupid me. I accidentally told him the morning after the party. He apparently snuck into the guest house because Serena ditched him at the party. Still not sure how he got in there. Anyway, I just let it slip out. He was fine with everything."

Chuck was incredulous. "He was fine with you banging his wife?"

Nate shrugged. "Seemed to be. Guess he just realized they weren't that compatible."

Chuck was starting to lose his buzz. "Maybe. Or maybe he didn't care because he's already fucking someone else." Nate looked at him with confusion and watched as Chuck tightly clinched his fist. He then leaned up, chugged back the rest of his Scotch, and slammed his glass on the table.

There was no doubt in his mind now. Dan Humphrey was fucking his wife.

**AN: Extra long chapter, I know! I probably should have split it up but I couldn't seem to find a decent stopping place. Anyway, a little something for everyone in this chapter, I think. Hopefully you are all still enjoying the story as much as I am enjoying writing it. Thanks again for reading and reviewing. You all are the best readers a girl could ask for!**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

It was early morning on the Upper East Side, but Dan and Blair were doing their part to help wake up the city.

"Jesus, Humphrey-" Blair moaned. Dan watched in wonder as the tiny brunette rocked on top of him slowly, deliberately. It was still dark outside, but hints of moonlight made Blair's eyes sparkle and highlighted the curves of her body. At some point during the night, Blair had "lost" her new Emerald and diamond necklace to the nightstand.

"Fucking holy shit, Humphrey. How could I have ever given this up!?" Blair cried out at the top of her lungs.

Dan had no answer for her, but it didn't even matter now. He shut his eyes tightly, enjoying the sound of Blair's now raspy voice and the expletives rolling off of her extremely UN-lady like tongue.

He gripped her hips even more tightly, struggling to keep up with the increasing speed of his Upper East Side Princess.

"Hmmpph! Humphrey! Oh God. Oh GOD!" she screamed as she came hard, but she continued to ride him. It took Dan a few more thrusts until he came as well and Blair was pleased with her own extra effort on his behalf as she collapsed onto his chest. She snuggled up against him and sighed. "How does it just keep getting better and better?" Blair asked, breathing heavily into Dan's ear. Dan grinned as he pulled the comforter over their sweaty bodies. He moved on top of her.

"It's just one of life's little mysteries, I guess. Like, 'where were we before we were born?' or 'what came first, the chicken or the egg?'" Dan leaned in to kiss Blair in the crook of her neck.

"Well that one's not a mystery, Humphrey," Blair scoffed. "The chicken most definitely came first."

"Maybe not," Dan replied, continuing to work the crook of her neck with his teeth and tongue. He suddenly looked up. "Unless...you go with the theory that the chicken that laid the first egg was _actually_ some type of ancestral chicken, such as the Red Junglefowl. Then you would have to say that it was indeed the _egg_ that came first."

"But," she said between tiny sighs, "An ancestral chicken is still a chicken, Humphrey."

"Blair, the question isn't, 'What came first? The _ancestral_ chicken or the egg?" Dan switched over to work the other side of her neck. "We're talking about our chickens as we know them today. You know according to Nietzsche, there is no first anything, because time is eternally repetitive. So if you adhere to that line of thought, then neither the chicken nor the egg came first." Dan waited for a response as he kissed along her collarbone. Blair frowned up at him and roughly pushed him off of her. Dan groaned in protest as he watched her slide out from under him. He grabbed her hand and she turned to face him.

"As much as I want to stay here in bed and continue this deeply fascinating chicken slash egg conversation, I really do need a bath because I smell like a vineyard." Dan grinned from his victory-and Blair's choice of simile-as she yanked her hand away from his and got out of bed. She stuck her tongue out at him as she walked past. He looked on as she continued on towards the bathroom door. Before she disappeared inside, she quickly turned around and gave Dan a look he knew far too well. Batting her doe eyed lashes, she lingered for a moment in the doorway and bit her lip. She then smiled devilishly and slowly closed the door behind her. Dan swallowed and shut his eyes for a moment. He was already getting hard again.

He leaned back and relaxed into the pillows, hands resting behind his head. He soon heard the sound of running water, and what was possibly Blair humming. Dan figured he'd give her a couple of minutes before crashing her soak. Let her work up some nice, foamy, bubbles.

He was completely at peace. So relaxed that his mind started to meditate beyond the confines of the Waldorf penthouse. The wheels of Dan's divorce were officially spinning now, and he had a bit of work to do. He needed to find an attorney-something he didn't think would be too difficult. He also had a meeting with his editor in two days to discuss the next set of chapters and more future book ideas. Dan definitely needed to get to work on that front.

Right now he was concerned with Blair. They hadn't done any real conversing about what happened with her on Christmas-in fact, she hadn't mentioned Chuck or Serena at all. Last night, they'd just gone straight to fucking each other's brains out. Dan had no clue what had triggered her drinking binge, but hoped she would enlighten him at some point. It was hard enough being away from her-he didn't need anymore reasons to worry about her when they weren't together.

Above all, Dan was fearful that Blair would revert to what she'd done in the past. Avoiding reality. She had a child. She had a notoriously vindictive husband. And she had a very judgmental mother. Dealing with one out of three was hard enough, but dealing with all of them at once was downright daunting. But she had to face them.

Dan listened to the sounds of Blair splashing and humming. She seemed happy, and Dan knew he was the reason. She trusted him and all Dan wanted to do was be there for her. He wouldn't let her down, but somehow he needed to encourage her to find some inner strength and convince her that she didn't need to fear Chuck or her mother, or her child. Dan took a deep breath, and got out of bed. He took a moment, stretched his arms out over his head, then walked to the bathroom. He opened the door to the sight of a grinning Blair relaxing in the giant tub, wet hair flailed about, and bubbles gone wild.

"Just when I was starting to get used to the taste of you mixed with Dom, you go and wash it off?"

"I've replaced it with Pomegranate and Peony bubble bath. I think you'll find the taste suitable to your palate." Blair smiled, licking her lips. She was suddenly distracted at the image before her. "Good lord, Humphrey." She blew a handful of bubbles in his direction. "Ready again so soon?" she asked in disbelief.

Dan's grinned. "Guess I'll have to help you out there," she shrugged. Without hesitation, Blair got up on her knees as Dan took a step towards her, eager to let her assist him. She kept her eyes on him as she reached for his erection, stroking him for a second with her fingernails. She gently blew on him and he trembled in response. "Patience, Humphrey." He placed his hands on her shoulders as Blair leaned in to suck on him, taking him halfway into her mouth and pausing. Dan inhaled sharply and tilted his head down at the teasing vixen beneath him, making lingering eye contact with her as she began to caress his balls. Without warning, she pulled her mouth off of him completely, causing him to groan in protest. He bucked against her, his way of begging her to continue. Blair smirked. Loving the sense of power she held over him, she then placed the tip of her tongue on _his_ tip, holding it there for what seemed to be an excruciatingly long amount of time. Dan could feel Blair smiling against him as she began to move her fingertips slowly along his shaft, gliding them up and down. The little minx continued to hold her tongue in place on the highly sensitive spot, and he continued to buck against her. Finally Dan was at a point where he couldn't take it anymore. Blair screamed in surprise as he pushed her off of him and recklessly jumped into the tub behind her. Warm water and bubbles overflowed onto the bathroom floor as he roughly grabbed her shoulders, propping himself on his knees behind her. With one hand he pulled Blair's waist in closer to him, dipping his fingers under the water to trace her abdomen and beyond, until they went down to explore the depths of her pussy. His fingers worked her for a moment, teasing and caressing, until her body began to lose control over all senses. She closed her eyes in response, perfectly relaxed with Dan's fingers transporting her to a place she wanted to spend all eternity. "How does that feel, Blair?" he whispered in a deep growl.

"So good," she whispered.

Dan smiled as he suddenly stopped. Before she could protest, he pulled her up by her elbows and began teasing her ass with his member. She relaxed against him as he continued to run the show. Dan's hands were suddenly all over her. Neck, shoulders, breasts, ass, thighs. She didn't know where he would go next and it was thrilling.

Dan was rock hard and throbbing as he adjusted her hips and entered her from behind. She bit her lip and gasped in response as he pushed her back down over the edge of the tub, his hand skimming through soapy bubbles along the length of her back, massaging and caressing her creamy skin. One hand eventually found its way to the base of her neck and gripped her there. She quivered at the feel, and braced herself on the edge of the tub. He then started to pound her. Slowly. Each thrust sending bubbles and water splashing over the sides of the tub and onto the bathroom floor. One hand gripped her hip as the other now massaged the front of her neck. "You really are good, Blair." Dan whispered into her ear, as her wet hair flew with each thrust. He continued the agonizingly slow pace. "Baby, you're so good." Dan worked his fingers down from her neck, teasing her breasts and abdomen along the way and began to work her pussy again. He wanted to make sure she was getting the full "Humphrey" treatment. Every part of her would have his attention. Dan worked her in rhythm with his thrusts, massaging her clit-alternating between pinching and flicking it. She moaned in appreciation.

He decided it was time to speed up and Blair sensed the change coming. She tightened her grip on the edge as he tightened his grip on her hips, the sound of skin to skin contact mixed with splashing water echoed throughout the room until Dan was finally ready to release himself inside of her. After a few more wild thrusts of penetration, they both came together, with another litany of expletives flowing from Blair's mouth. An exhausted Dan collapsed on top of Blair, who was now completely leaning over the edge of the tub. Their breathing was rapid and in synch. Dan enveloped Blair in his arms, pulling her away from the edge and back up against him in the tub, and wrapped his legs tightly around her. She closed her eyes as Dan held her, his fingertips trickling down her arms.

"Blair..."

"Mmm," Blair sighed. "Yeah," Dan agreed. "You're lucky that orgasms cure hangovers." Blair splashed at him. "I wasn't even that drunk, Humphrey."

Dan laughed. "I...you were pretty drunk, Blair," he replied, changing what he was going to say in mid-sentence.

Okay, maybe she had been a tiny bit drunk. But she felt great now.

"You know what we should do?" Blair began, her voice suddenly full of excitement. "We should go on a trip. We could leave tomorrow, in fact. I can book us someplace tropical and really hot. Maybe a private island in the Seychelles? Or the Maldives? Although Chuck took me to the Maldives two years ago. Let's just say it wasn't the best experience. Anyway, I could really use some Vitamin D. Do you even own a pair of swim trunks?"

Blair had him nearly convinced. Unfortunately, he had to be the voice of reason here. Though the thought of accompanying her to a desert island, drinking papaya cocktails and making love in the sand sounded like his idea of heavenly bliss, this definitely wasn't the right time. This week, Dan had a divorce to tend to and book editors to meet. And Blair had way too much on her plate-not to mention a kid.

"As glorious as that sounds, Blair, I don't think it's really an ideal time to head out of town. I have to find a divorce attorney, and you...well isn't your mother coming into town and throwing some party I'm not invited to?"

Blair shrugged. "All the more reason to skip it."

"Blair, you also have Chuck and your son to think about. I think Chuck would get a little suspicious if you told him you were just going to up and take a vacation to the Seychelles."

"And that's why I wouldn't tell him about it. Really Dan, why are you trying to ruin my peaceful soak by bringing up the C word?" Blair began to run her fingers through her hair, trying to work through some of the tangles.

"I'm not trying to ruin anything, Blair. But I do think you're going to have to start figuring out how you're going to handle everything. And probably sooner rather than later. With Chuck. With your son. Nate told me yesterday that he thinks that you and Chuck are having problems. So word's starting to get around. The sooner you face these things, the better." Blair didn't say anything, but Dan knew he had struck a nerve. Which was precisely what he was going for.

"You want to tell me what happened yesterday with you and Serena?"

Blair had to think for a moment. Yesterday seemed like ages ago. "With Serena? Serena...oh yeah, Serena. Well, she was withholding information from me. Wait. No...first she crashed my brunch. But then she refused to offer up any information about your divorce. Not one word! Oh, and then she accused me of not answering her phone calls. Which was kind of true," she said as she shrugged. Fortunately for Dan, he kind of understood what she was trying to say due to his ability to comprehend warped logic.

"So what happened with Chuck? I mean, something must have happened if you had to come here last night, right?"

"He tried to get me to sleep with him! In the limo. ON the way back from brunch. A brunch he forced me to leave because he said I was drunk. And I hadn't even wanted him to come in the first place!"

Dan was suddenly concerned. "Did he try to force you-" Blair shook her head no, understanding what he was getting at. "No. But the asshole actually pulled me out of my chair at Palm Court. In front of everyone! It was humiliating." Dan ran his fingers through his wet hair.

"So you told the limo driver to drop you off here after he-"

"Kind of. I walked most of the way from the Plaza actually because I couldn't take being in the car with him anymore."

Dan shook his head. "Okay, Blair, I honestly think you need to start considering-" Dan hesitated. The last thing he wanted was to tell her what to do. She needed to come to her own conclusions. But Chuck was a pig. And husband or no, the thought of him touching her made him sick to his stomach. How could it not be clear to her what she needed to do?

"Filing for divorce." Blair calmly finished his sentence and turned to look at him.

"I know. I do." She leaned back into Dan, and they sat in silence for a minute.

"But, I don't know. Maybe now's not the best time, you know? Right in the middle of the holidays? They're already so stressful, and with my mother coming in... I mean, I know I need to start considering my options. And I will. But I don't even-" She was starting to choke up.

"Hey-" Dan whispered. "It's going to be fine. You're going to be fine."

Dan understood. Her last divorce had been pretty traumatic, but he had been there for her every step of the way. And he would be again.

"I just don't think I can deal with any of this until after the new year. Organizing this stupid party with all of these buyers. And Dorota's coming in this morning to-" Blair suddenly froze.

"Oh shit. Dorota! She's coming here. She's coming here today! Oh shit, shit, shit." Blair inhaled, then exhaled, and nervously scrambled to get out of the tub. She was clearly frazzled now. "Waldorf. Relax." Dan grabbed her hand and gently pulled her back down against him.

"No. Dan! I have to get _dressed_. I have no idea when Dorota's getting here. And your bags are still-"

"I moved them upstairs last night, Blair. Into you know who's old room."

"You did?" she asked meekly. "Well, then I still need to-"

"Also wiped up the remnants of champagne from Eleanor's dining room table. No evidence remains. Though I wouldn't be against reenacting that scene again at some point."

"And what if she barges in here?"

"Then she's going to get an eyeful," Dan laughed.

Blair smiled and turned around in the tub to straddle him and leaned in to give him a deep kiss. She pulled away to look at him. "Humphrey, you always take care of everything. And me." She smiled, and though her eyes were slightly red now, they still gleamed. "I don't think you should go back to Nate's," she said as she started to run her fingers through his hair.

"Nah, I think I'm just going to go back to the loft. Get back to my roots. Look for divorce attorneys." Blair nodded.

"When's Rufus coming back? Have you told him about you and Serena?" Dan shook his head.

"I talked to him yesterday, but didn't tell him anything. He'll probably hear about it soon, though. I'm sure Lily will probably call him and bitch him out."

Blair began to trace little shapes along Dan's chest. "I'm starving," she announced.

"Yeah, me too. What'd ya say we get out of here? I'll whip us something up." Blair nodded as she reached for a bath towel.

"Except, there's no food here, Dan."

Dan watched for a moment, enjoying the picture of Blair drying herself off. All of a sudden he wasn't too concerned with food.

Blair paused for a moment as she towel dried her hair. "You don't...think he'd try to take him away from me do you? I mean if I asked him for a divorce? He wouldn't try to take him away, would he?"

The question caught Dan off guard. He thought Blair was done with the divorce discussion and everything it encompassed, but apparently this was something that was still eating at her.

His first instinct was to tell her no, that even Chuck would never sink so low. But that would be a lie. This was Chuck Bass they were talking about. Biggest asshole on the Upper East Side. Who knew how he'd retaliate if Blair were to ask him for a divorce?

Dan had to be honest with her. "I really can't say, Blair. Chuck can be pretty ruthless. Especially when things don't go his way. But you can't let that deter you. No judge in his right mind is going to take a child away from his mother." Blair nodded, seemingly assuaged by the last part of the answer. She wrapped the towel around her body and started combing out her hair. Dan was right. She couldn't let the fear of what Chuck would potentially do affect her. She had to get out of this marriage. And she would. Right after things settled down and her mother was back in Paris and the party was over and the buyers were pleased with the new line. Right after the new year, she thought.

"So. A divorce attorney for me." Dan announced. "Where should I start? The yellow pages," he joked.

Blair frowned. "Humphrey, you don't find an attorney in the yellow pages. I'm sure Serena will use whomever Lily picks out for her. Dalton Craig, probably. I hate to say it, but you might have to get an outer borough attorney. There aren't going to be a whole lot of Manhattan divorce attorneys willing to take on the van der Woodsens."

"Really? You think? Because I really want this all to be as amicable as possible. I don't want anything from Serena. Just a simple divorce."

"There is no such thing as a simple divorce, Humphrey." Blair's eyes locked in on his, and Dan knew immediately that she wasn't just talking about his divorce anymore. She was talking about Louis and Chuck. Before he could respond, Blair heard her phone ringing in the other room. She raced out of the bathroom to get it while Dan launched himself out of the tub and grabbed a bath towel. He wrapped it around his waist and watched her from behind the door.

"Yes," he heard her say. "Yes, Dorota. That will be fine. See you then." Blair returned to the bathroom. "Dorota's running late," she explained. "But she'll be here within the hour."

"Guess I better evacuate the premises." Dan joked.

"What? Why? You don't have to go to the loft," Blair pleaded. You can stay here if you want."

"Like a kept man? Blair, your doorman is already suspicious. He was staring daggers at me last night. And Dorota has that relationship with the KGB."

"Raymond is loyal to the core," Blair insisted. "And Dorota is, too. Besides, she always liked you better than Chuck."

"We weren't cheating on our spouses with each other back then, though. Dorota might have something to say about it now."

"Not if we tell her that they cheated first!" Touche.

"Come on, Hum-phree." She took a suggestive step towards him. "Don't you want to stay here and be my dirty little secret. I can sneak up food and water. And copies of 'The New Yorker.' And you'll be here to fuck me when I command you to." Dan scrunched is face.

"As 'amazing' as you make sex slavery sound, I think I better lay low for a while. Get back to my old neighborhood. Serena might come looking for me and it wouldn't necessarily look good if she finds me camped out at your family's penthouse. And don't even get me started on Chuck. Who's to say he won't barge in here at any time."

"He knows to steer clear of me right now," Blair said, still trying to persuade him.

"Blair, as much as I want to stay here, we both know I shouldn't. However...under the cloak of night, you're certainly welcome to come and give me a Brooklyn booty call." She smacked him on the ass and smiled.

* * *

Chuck hadn't slept, not since putting it all together. Had he not been baked last night he would have punched something. Nate hadn't even realized the help he gave Chuck in assembling the Dan and Blair puzzle. Nate had given him crucial information on Humphrey's whereabouts and activities on the night of his Christmas party and he never even caught on to why Chuck was asking. Poor Nate. His password was still "soccer."

Chuck sucked on his Scotch laden ice cube, then spit it back into his glass. He was beyond angry-he was insulted. How dare Blair think she can cheat on him and get away with it. And in Nate's damn guest house. With a party going on yards away. Chuck thought back to the incident in the limo. That second phone-it had to have been for Humphrey. She had a dedicated Dan Humphrey phone. Chuck shook his head in disgust. Did she think he was stupid? Telling him it was an employee's work phone...

Chuck wanted revenge, and he wanted it _yesterday_.

Blair had been cheating on him with someone they both knew-someone who Chuck had deemed beneath them both, yet curiously, someone who Chuck had also once considered a friend. Though he really wouldn't know the definition of the word. Cheating with the nanny was one thing. A tryst or two with Eva was harmless. Those encounters meant nothing. They were just about sex. There was nothing emotional involved. Besides, if anyone was to blame for Chuck stepping outside of his marriage, it was Blair. She drove him to it because she wasn't performing her wifely duties.

Chuck exhaled and checked the time on his phone. He was due at Lily's to pick up Henry and have breakfast. He quickly texted his driver to have the car pulled around.

As he made his way to the front of the building, Chuck began running through a list of potential scenarios in his head. Divorce wasn't one of them, because divorce from Blair would never be an option. The fact that she hadn't yet broached the subject could only be a positive for him, Chuck thought. He could only assume that after her divorce from Louis, she was a bit gun shy. And if she thought dealing with Louis had been bad...

Because if she ever _did_ bring up the D word, he would do whatever he could to inflict maximum pain upon her. It was only a matter of time before he would have pictures of Dan and his wife. How bad would it look for the CEO of an international fashion house to have photos of her and her lover leaked around the globe. Especially if that lover was her best friend's soon to be ex-husband. Eleanor would be livid.

Chuck smirked at the thought as his driver opened the door for him, and he settled himself into the back seat.

Then there was the subject of Henry. Their son. There was no way in hell Blair was going to take his only son away from him. Hell, she'd be lucky if Chuck ever let her see him again. Now that Lily, Serena, and nearly everyone at Palm Court had seen her drunken display on Christmas day, her ability to be a suitable parent could easily be called into question. It was just the insurance he needed to ensure that Blair would never win in a custody battle.

But Chuck wouldn't just have revenge on Blair. Oh no-he had a few things in mind for Dan Humphrey also. He was fully prepared to go after Dan in a court of law for interfering with his marriage. He would see to it that his bank accounts were wiped clean and that his reputation was sullied beyond repair. Chuck was completely prepared to play the scorned husband. Dan would never sell another book in this town again. He might even have to leave New York altogether after being completely ruined.

But of course, Chuck hoped it wouldn't have to come to any of that. These were all simply 'what ifs.' Possibilities he was prepared to implement. But first things first.

Phase one. He needed to create a rift between Blair and Brooklyn. And he needed Serena's help to do it. Since he and Serena weren't yet divorced, she still had a small window of opportunity to win him back. And with Dan out of the way, Chuck could focus on ways to keep Blair close. Nothing like playing on a mother's guilty conscience to do so.

The driver stopped in front of the van der Woodsen's building and Vanya greeted him at the door.

"Good morning, Mr. Bass."

"Vanya," he greeted back. Chuck started to make his way to the elevator, but before he got too far, quickly turned back around on his heel. "Vanya, if I may...a question?"

"Yes, Mr. Bass?"

"Has Dan Humphrey been around today?"

Vanya shook his head no. "No, sir. I don't think I've seen him since day before Christmas Eve. I didn't work yesterday."

"I was only inquiring, Vanya, because unfortunately, Mr. and Mrs. Humphrey are getting a divorce."

"Oh." Vanya nodded his head, unsurprised.

"Did you already know, Vanya?" Chuck found his reaction to be strange.

"No, sir."

"But, you don't seem that surprised." Chuck cocked his head to the side. "Any particular reason?"

Vanya appeared to be having some sort of internal struggle. "Please don't say anything, Mr. Bass, but I see the Humphries were having the problems."

"Problems?" Chuck raised an eyebrow. "What kinds of problems?"

"Well, I don't know for sure. Mr. Humphrey confided in me last week. He and Mrs. Humphrey...things not so good." Vanya seemed as if he had more to say, but was biting his tongue.

"Go on, Vanya. I promise to keep whatever you say confidential." Vanya nodded.

"I just have weird feeling about Mr. Humphrey. For past month or so he always leave through back service door. Says he is simple man with simple needs. Doesn't like grandiosity of doorman. But he had no problem with doorman before."

Chuck gave him a pointed nod. "Not that I would know first hand, but that sounds a little like someone who doesn't want anyone to see his comings and goings. Don't you agree?" Vanya nodded a little too eagerly.

"Thank you, Vanya, for your time. I'm about to go see Serena now. Try to bring her some words of comfort."

"Please give her my best, Mr. Bass."

"I certainly will, Vanya." Chuck patted him on the back. "Oh, and Vanya. Best not to share this information about Mr. Humphrey with Mrs. Humphrey. It will just upset her." Vanya nodded in compliance. "Yes, sir."

He watched as Chuck made his way onto the elevator. Once he was completely out of his field of vision, Vanya pulled out his phone to text Dorota.

"_Humphrey marriage kaput_!"

Chuck entered Lily's penthouse, and was immediately greeted with the sound of his son laughing with Serena. They were playing with the latest X-Box, a gift from Lily. "Haha. I did better than you!" Henry yelled at Serena. "You couldn't even get to the second level!"

"What are you two up to?" Chuck's voice rang out over the sound of the video game. Serena and Henry turned around simultaneously.

"Dad!" His pajama clad son dropped his game controller and ran into his arms. "Dad, Aunt Serena couldn't even get any spells!" Chuck looked up at Serena for clarification.

"Mini Ninjas Two," Serena explained.

"Ah-ha. So you had fun?" Chuck was pleased to see Henry and Serena getting on so well. Depending on how things went, he might need a female role model for his son down the line.

"I'm ready to go see mommy now. Is she feeling better?" Chuck had to bite his tongue. He wanted to keep his family in tact, meaning no disparaging remarks about Henry's mother.

"I'm sure Mommy's feeling much better today. But she's not home. We'll see her after breakfast."

"Where'd Blair have to be so early?" Serena inquired. "I would have thought she'd be sleeping off the-" Chuck turned to glare at his step-sister, and she quickly got the message. He may have been angry with Blair, but he didn't need Henry exposed to things that could affect him negatively. The last thing he wanted was to have to explain to him what a hangover was. "Henry, why don't you go and get dressed so we can eat breakfast." Henry stomped his foot.

"'I'm not hungry, I want to see Mommy!" Chuck kneeled down before his son, grabbing him by the arms. He was close to losing his cool. "I told you, we will see mommy later. Right now, I need you to get dressed."

"Henry," Serena interceded. "I have one more surprise for you if you're a good boy. But first you need to run upstairs and get dressed. Grandma Lily is just in her room. Knock on her door and ask her to help you." Henry pouted, but reluctantly did what Serena asked him to do. As soon as he made it up the stairs, Chuck turned to face Serena.

"You have a way with kids, you know that?" Chuck asked, attempting to butter her up.

Serena rolled her eyes. "What's going on? Where's Blair?" Chuck peeled his jacket off and had a seat on the couch. "She's angry with me. Stayed at the penthouse last night. She'll be fine." Before Serena could ask any more questions, Chuck put to focus back on her. "I just want you to know that if you need anything, anything at all, I'm here for you."

Serena seemed sincerely touched. "I think I'll be okay. I've been thinking it over and Dan was probably right. We just don't have much in common. Divorce is probably the best solution. All I want is for it to be quick and simple and not dragged out over a long period of time."

Chuck nodded, then gave her a quizzical look. "That's very noble of you. But-"

"Chuck, I know there's no love lost between you and Dan, but I don't see any point in making this messier than it should be." Chuck laughed. "Serena, that's not what I was going to say at all. What I was _going_ to say before you interrupted me, was that I think you're giving up too easily. You and Dan were a perfect balance. If there were ever two people meant to be together, it's you two."

Serena was taken a back by Chuck's attitude. "Really? You think so? I never thought I'd hear you say that. But I thought so, too. It doesn't seem that way anymore..."

"Serena, listen to me. You need to call Dan. Ask him to coffee and tell him you want to talk. Then bring him to Eleanor's New Year's Eve party. It's the perfect event to give a marriage a fresh new start."

"Chuck, I'm not going to do that. I doubt Dan wants to talk to me after I called him an 'arrogant prick.' And Eleanor's New Year's Eve party? That's just about the last place I'd want to bring him. Not to mention Blair's not exactly thrilled with me right now." Precisely.

"What better place _to_ bring him? Out with the old. In with the new. Everyone gets to start over. And you can give your relationship another shot."

"Dan asked me for a divorce, Chuck. He hasn't even called me since it happened. There's no way he's going to want to attend a New Year's Eve party with me."

Chuck smiled. "Serena. Dan's a man. And Serena van der Woodsen can have any man she wants. And if by night's end the spark hasn't returned, you can simply chalk it up to one last hurrah."

Serena seemed to be taking everything Chuck said into consideration. "You think he'd really go for it?"

"Do you love him, Serena?" Chuck had her exactly where he wanted her. She needed just a little more prodding.

"Yes," she replied, meekly. "I do."

Chuck nodded towards her phone which was sitting directly in front of her on the coffee table. "Then you know what you need to do."

* * *

Dan threw some bills at the taxi driver and grabbed his bags. It had been a while since he'd been back to the loft. Rufus wasn't due back from Paris for a few more days, and he was looking forward to the solitude. He could get some writing done at least, and get started on hiring a divorce attorney. Dan entered the loft and dropped his bags in the entry way. Everything looked exactly the same to him. He barely had the door closed when his phone started ringing. Dan smiled, reaching inside his jacket pocket. It had been thirty minutes. About time Blair had called to check on him. When he looked at his phone, however, he noticed it wasn't Blair calling him. It was Serena. Dan hesitated for a moment, not sure what to expect from his estranged wife. He finally answered, bracing himself for another possible tirade.

"Hello?" Dan gulped.

"Dan!" He was immediately caught off guard. Serena seemed to be in an exceptionally good mood, or at least she was pretending to be.

"Hey..Serena. Umm...what's up?" Dan had absolutely no idea what to say to her.

"I was just wondering...if you maybe had some time today. To get together and talk?" Dan had no clue where this sudden joviality was coming from, but he guessed he owed it to her to have a sit down. He could express his desire to her for the divorce to be as pain free as possible for both of them.

"Yeah, I guess I have a little time today..." Dan said, still a bit uneasy about meeting up with her.

"Okay great! Well, where are you? I'll come to you." Serena was definitely up to something, Dan just didn't know what. "

"I'm at the loft," he replied.

"Great! See you in an hour or so." Before Dan could say yay or nay to the selected meet up time, she hung up.

Dan collapsed against the door for a second, then quickly got to unpacking his bags. He pulled out Nate's gift box of pot and shoved it under a couch cushion. No doubt he would be needing it later. He then took a look around. The place was a little too tidy.

Dan went into his old bedroom and messed his bed up, trying to make it look like he'd actually spent the night there. He pulled the copy of "Anna Karenina" he'd gotten for Blair out from underneath his pillow and re-stashed it in a nearby closet. He then spent the next hour in a semi-maniacal state, bobbing around the loft. Sitting, checking email, then switching seats and checking email again. He was about to put on a pot of coffee when he heard a knock on the door. He took a breath and quickly made his way to the front. Unsurprisingly, Dan pulled it open to find Serena standing before him, looking fresh and relaxed. Completely different from the woman who wanted to have his head on a platter just a couple of days earlier. She flashed him a grin and gave him a hug, then handed him a gift wrapped box. Dan hesitantly took it from her hands and exhaled.

"You...got me a gift?" Saying it out loud made him feel like an asshole. He surveyed the baby blue gift wrapped box, evidence that it was from Tiffany's. Serena nodded. "It's okay. I know you do all of your shopping on Christmas Eve. I wasn't expecting anything. So open it." She walked past him, inviting herself in as she took off her coat. She headed straight for the closet that he had stashed Blair's gift in.

"Uh, I'll..I'll take your coat," Dan said, practically screaming at her from across the room. Serena turned around. "It's okay, Dan. I can hang up my own coat." Before he could protest further, she opened the closet door, and instantly caught sight of the silver gift wrapped box with a green bow. She turned to look at him.

"Rufus's gift," Dan lied. Please don't look at the gift tag please don't look at the gift tag, he thought to himself. Serena nodded as she grabbed a hanger and placed the coat inside. Dan closed his eyes in relief for a moment and Serena turned back around to face him.

"Well? Open it!"

For a second Dan had forgotten he was still holding Serena's gift in his hands. He quickly fumbled with the packaging and opened the box. Inside was a gorgeous, Atlas chronograph rose gold watch. Again, Dan felt like an asshole.

"Wow..I don't know what to say. It's beautiful. Are you sure you want me to have this, though? I mean after-"

"Please, Dan. Of course I want you to have it. So put it on!" Dan did as he was told, securing the watch on his wrist. "The present-that's not the only reason I came to see you today." Dan figured as much.

"I was just about to brew some coffee. You, uh, want some?" Because Dan was definitely going to need it.

"Please," Serena replied as she walked over to the kitchen island, taking a seat on a stool in front of him. Dan got to work on brewing the coffee, then turned to face her.

"Listen, Serena. I need you to know that I want to make this as easy on you as possible. There's no reason our divorce can't be civil."

Serena nodded. "Dan, I completely agree with you. I mean, on wanting to keep things civil. If it comes to that." Dan's eyes shot up. If it comes to that? "I know we argued the other night at Nate's. And we both said things that were hostile and that we didn't mean, but I honestly don't think we're at the point to just give up yet." Dan's eyes narrowed in on Serena's. She was actually trying to save their marriage. Their lifeless, no pulse found, dead on arrival marriage.

"Dan," she continued. "I think we owe it to ourselves to fight a little harder. I don't want to lose what we have. It took us nearly six years to get to this point. That's a long time to just give up and throw it all away." This was definitely not what Dan wanted to hear. At this point he would have preferred a tirade.

"Serena, I'm not sure there's anything _to_ throw away. We've been running on fumes for awhile." Serena shook her head.

"I don't see it that way, Dan. Not at all. I see it as neglect." Dan wasn't sure what to say. He was willing to do just about anything to get her to leave at this point, though.

"Here's what I'm proposing. I think we owe it to ourselves so see our marriage through until the new year. I want to be able to celebrate the new year, not mourn through it."

"Serena, there's no reason for either of us to mourn. We're both going to be fine. We can still be friends."

"Dan. You're not listening to me. I don't want a divorce. I want us to be able say that we tried everything we could."

Dan shook his head. "I don't know what you want me to say, Serena."

"I think we need to give it a few days. Come with me to Eleanor's New Year's party. And if I can't convince you by then that we're meant to be together, then I'll give you the quickest divorce in the history of Manhattan. We can consider the party as one last celebration together." Dan was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He thought about it for a moment. If five days was going to be the difference between an amicable divorce or a bitter ex-wife, well then, he supposed he could suck it up. Besides, five days wasn't that long. He knew she wouldn't succeed in changing his mind so he might as well play along.

"Okay," Dan calmly relented. He didn't want Serena, but he didn't want her thinking he was an ass either.

Serena smiled and stood up to hug her husband. "We can make it work," she whispered, biting her lip. Dan shut his eyes tightly.

What had he just agreed to?

* * *

"Well, Dorota, if she's not happy with what we selected, then she won't be happy with anything," Blair announced, jotting down a few more notes in her event book.

"I agree, Miss Blair. Miss Eleanor will have no need for complaint. I go confirm menu with caterer now." Dorota started to get up, but a curious look fell upon her face.

"Miss Blair, you hear about Mister Dan and Miss Serena?" Blair looked up from her book.

"Of course, Dorota. We shall all have a moment of silence for their marriage on New Year's." Dorota looked at her quizzically.

"So you're not sad about Miss Serena's marriage breaking up?"

Blair shrugged. "Not particularly. It had a good run though. Serena's not necessarily built for marriage. She more of a mistress, I think." Blair didn't stop to think about the irony of her statement. Dorota found her answer peculiar.

"Miss Blair. How is _your_ marriage?" Blair's head sprung up. "Fabulous, Dorota. Feel free to ask me more personal questions," she continued sarcastically.

"If it 'fabulous' like you say, why you stay here last night. Alone. And why you drink entire bottle of Dom? All by yourself?" She was going to kill Dan for thinking the garbage can was an appropriate place to stash an empty bottle of Dom.

"Dorota, were you going through the garbage _again_?" Dorota made no apologies. If going through the garbage was wrong, then she didn't want to be right.

"I needed some me time, okay? And then I got thirsty. Any other questions, Sherlock?" Dorota began to circle her like a shark. But before she could get anymore questions out, the sound of the elevator door opening took them both by surprise. Eleanor Waldorf-Rose made her way through the foyer, chirping at someone on the phone. The doorman rolled a cart of her bags in behind her and placed them on the tile.

"Well, I don't care," Eleanor snapped. "The sooner we go into production, the sooner I can get rid of the increasing pile of zippers on my desk. I'm tired of looking at them!" With that, Eleanor threw her phone into her purse and made her way to the dining room where Blair and Dorota were.

"Mother?" Blair was confused. "I thought you weren't coming in until Sunday?" She knew she probably sounded disappointed, and she honestly didn't care.

"Well, you heard wrong, dear." She leaned in to kiss her daughter on both cheeks. "Cyrus and Harold and Roman all send their love. Oh, is that the final menu for the party?" She motioned for Dorota to hand her the sheet of paper she was holding and whipped out her bifocals. She did a quick scan and nodded her approval.

"Mmm hmm. This all looks fabulous." She turned to Dorota. "How many have RSVP'd?"

"As of now, we have fifty, Miss Eleanor."

"Well, we still have a day or so to get the counts in to the caterer I suppose. Any other news I should be aware of?" Eleanor looked at Dorota who was looking at Blair who was looking down at her nails and planning her escape. Now that her mother was in town, she was going to have to get out of the penthouse ASAP, though she had no idea where she was going to go. She was on the verge of a decent excuse to leave when once again she heard the sound of the elevator doors opening. All three women leaned around to see Henry running towards them, followed closely behind by Chuck. Blair thought she was going to be sick.

"Nana!" Henry yelled, running into his grandmother's arms. Blair cringed at the sound of her son's voice. That hangover was finally starting to kick in. Eleanor picked her grandson up and proceeded to dot him with kisses all over his face.

"Eleanor, you look beautiful as always," Chuck leaned in to kiss is mother-in-law on the cheek and she chuckled with delight. "Blair wasn't sure when you were getting in. This is a pleasant surprise." Blair glared at Chuck.

"Well, I'm not sure why not? I emailed her my itinerary." She gave Blair a pointed look. "And I couldn't stay away from my only grandson on Christmas." She set Henry back down on the floor. "Now, Henry. Run over and get my red leather bag. The Gucci one. It's in the foyer. Santa needed me to deliver a few more gifts to you." Blair rolled her eyes at her mother as Henry went sprinting towards the entryway.

"Blair, are you feeling better?" Blair looked up to see Chuck smirking at her.

"Darling? Are you sick?" Eleanor asked, concerned.

"I feel fine. Well. Maybe a little nauseous." Her response was a direct launch at Chuck.

"Oh, nauseous? Darling. You're not-" Eleanor's mouth fell open. Blair immediately regretted her word choice.

"Miss Blair are you and Mister Chuck?" Dorota was starting to get excited.

"What? NO! Since when does being nauseous automatically make one-"

"What Blair is trying to say, is that although we are currently working on giving Henry a little brother or sister, she is not yet with child. But soon." Blair couldn't believe him. If he had been wearing a bow tie she would have ripped the damn thing off of him and shoved it down his throat.

Eleanor leaned over to give her daughter a hug. "Well I have to say this is still wonderful news, Blair! An October baby would be marvelous!"

"Yeah." Blair declined to say anything else, but she would definitely be giving Chuck an earful later. She might even thank him. If anything, Chuck's comment was a reminder that she needed to schedule an appointment with her gynecologist. She was due for a new birth control prescription.

"I think I will go check on Mister Henry," Dorota announced, sensing the tension in the room. Eleanor handed her back the menu. She seemed oblivious.

"So. Since I missed actual Christmas, I'm going to take both of you and my grandson out to dinner this evening. Maybe 'Daniel?' Or 'Per Se?'" Eleanor turned to Blair, seeking her approval. "Blair?" Daniel sounded like the better option to her, she thought as her mind started to wander off.

"Blair?"

"I'm fine with either, mother," she finally answered flatly. "Great. 'Daniel' it is. I'll just go and make a reservation." An excellent choice, Blair thought to herself. She watched her mother disappear, and soon it was just her and Chuck, who was eyeing her quizzically.

"Blair," he said as he came over and had a seat next to her at the table.

"What, Chuck?" She knew that look. It was his, 'I'm such a thoughtful, caring and concerned husband look.'

"What did you do with the necklace?" Blair had to think about it for a moment.

"It's upstairs on my nightstand," she finally remembered.

"_Your_ nightstand," he repeated. "Blair, this isn't your home anymore," Chuck reminded her. "Your home is with me and your son. He's been asking for you all morning."

"That's bullshit, Chuck. Don't even try to guilt trip me. I know he was with Lily."

"I'm serious, Blair. You're the first thing he asked about when I went to pick him up this morning. He was concerned about you. He needed to know you were alright."

"Chuck, just stop. I'm not having this conversation with you now."

"Blair, what will you tell your mother when she finds out you slept here last night? What's she going to think?"

"Who cares, Chuck? Why are you so concerned with what my mother thinks?"

"Because she's my family, too, Blair." Blair shook her head. She knew this game and she wasn't playing.

"What exactly are you trying to accomplish, Chuck? Telling my mother we're trying to have another child!" Blair's voice was getting incrementally louder. "This sob story about family! And how Henry is asking for me. Just cut it out." Blair could feel her heart start to race. She knew she shouldn't let him get to her, but he was pissing her off.

"I don't understand why you're shutting me out, Blair," Chuck said calmly. "Why you're shutting out your son." He tried to reach out and grab her hand, but she pulled it away quickly. "This morning I had to explain to our son that mommy couldn't see him just yet because she's 'not feeling well.' When in reality she was just hungover. You think he didn't hear your comments in the restaurant to Lily? And how you were slurring your words? Is that really how you want Henry to know you?" Chuck's comments were penetrating her, and she felt tears start to burn in her eyes.

Chuck watched her closely. So far so good.

"Chuck, why are you..that's not what-"

"Is something wrong Blair? Chuck? What have I just walked in on?" Blair turned to see her mother standing in the entryway of the dining room and she wiped a tear away.

"Nothing's wrong, mother," Blair's voice cracked as she stood up. "Everything's just peachy." Eleanor and Chuck watched as Blair took off out of the dining room.

Eleanor looked at Chuck. "I'll fill you in," he said regretfully.

Blair ran up the stairs, right past Dorota and Henry. She didn't stop until she reached "her" room. She quickly pulled out her dedicated Dan phone, hoping to find some sort of message from him, but there was nothing. She laid there silently for a good ten minutes, softly weeping. A couple of minutes later there was a tiny knock on the door.

"Mommy?" Henry squawked as Blair wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Yes, baby?" She said as she leaned up on her elbows.

"Are you taking a nap because you don't feel well?" he asked innocently.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Do you want me to take a nap with you to make you feel better?" Blair let out a cross between a hysterical laugh and a sob.

"That would be nice," she finally answered him back. Henry quickly took his shoes off and cannonballed himself onto the bed. It made Blair laugh. He snuggled himself up against her and Blair gripped her son tightly.

Some thirty minutes later, there was another light knock on the door. Having gotten no response, Chuck proceeded to push the door open. He stood in the doorframe and watched for a moment as Blair and Henry slept peacefully, her arms still fully embracing him.

Chuck smirked. He _may_ have been responsible for sending Henry up to 'check' on her.

And phase one was going completely according to plan.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

Dan threw his phone down on the coffee table. Blair hadn't been returning any of his calls or texts, though he kept telling himself there was probably a reasonable explanation. Eleanor was in town. That meant lots of family drama to keep Blair occupied-and an insanely controlling mother to keep her in check. In contrast, Serena hadn't stopped texting or calling. Or hovering. Or calling again. She driving him absolutely bonkers.

Dan pulled out "The Box," Nate's very special Christmas gift to him. He wasn't sure he knew exactly how to use it, but he'd watched Nate do it on many occasions, so how hard could it be? Besides. He really needed to chill out.

Dan grabbed the bong, walked to the sink, and filled it with water. He took a handful of weed and packed it recklessly into the bowl, then grabbed a candle lighter that was sitting on the counter. Dan took a seat on the couch. It was New Year's Eve morning and life was going by at a snail's pace. But he knew tonight, there would be at least some light at the end of the tunnel. Because tonight was Eleanor Waldorf's New Year's Eve party. It would be the absolute last hurrah for him and Serena. And their marriage. More importantly, he knew that Blair would be there. He had been left to relive his last moments with her over and over. He'd even written an ode to champagne sex and bubble baths, in addition to countless other drabbles.

A few days earlier, Dan told Serena he would give their relationship an additional five days, just to be sure there was nothing left to salvage before moving on with divorce proceedings. Dan already knew there wasn't, and it wasn't his intention to give her false hope, but he was trying to avoid a full on "War of the Roses." Unfortunately, he probably had only managed to create additional bitterness and animosity on her end. The night of their "talk," she decided to take him to 67 Burger. Why not, Dan thought. He had to eat.

But it became more than a little uncomfortable when Serena started hand feeding him curly fries. And dipping them in ketchup for him. She giggled every time she brought one up to his mouth. After about the tenth one, Dan slapped her hand away-probably a little bit harder than he should have. He apologized, but could only glare at her when she asked him if something was wrong.

The day after the curly fry incident they took in the petting zoo at Prospect Park. All Dan could think about was how much more entertaining it would be to watch Blair feeding a baby doll sheep as opposed to watching Serena, who seemed to have planned out all of her reactions ahead of time. That night, Serena invited herself to stay over at the loft, citing fatigue from a long day of "petting." Dan could only cringe at the double entendre. He wasn't crazy about the idea of her staying with him, but he relented. Again, he did it for the sake of civility.

He should have seen what was coming next.

That night, as Dan sat on the couch to read, he was startled when Serena grabbed his book out of his hands and casually threw it onto the floor. That was certainly no way to treat Fitzgerald, Dan thought. Serena wore nothing but one of Dan's old shirts as she went to straddle him on the couch. "Dan. It's been..." She panted heavily as she leaned in to kiss him on the neck and began pulling his shirt out of his pants. "I need this ..so badly..." Dan stopped Serena's hands in their tracks, pushing them away. She looked at him, confused. "What?" she asked.

"Serena. I'm..I think I might be coming down with something. That stomach bug is going around." He gave her a regretful look and slid her off of him as he grabbed his stomach for full effect. He then walked into the bathroom, not bothering to look back for Serena's reaction. She hadn't tried to seduce him since, but she did continue to buzz around him like a gnat, whisking him off to pool halls and bowling alleys. The only reason she wasn't here at this very moment was because Lily had booked New Year's Eve massages for the two of them. He'd never been so grateful to Lily.

Dan held the bong up in front of him. He placed his mouth around the opening and lit the bowl. He watched as the smoke rose up through the tube. Dan slowly started to inhale, and almost immediately he coughed. After a bit of practice, he finally mastered it. He closed his eyes, letting the herb run through his veins. It was exactly what he needed. Not being able to contact Blair, and having Serena on his back had taken its toll. He was finally relaxing.

Buzz or no, his thoughts kept drifting back to Blair. He just couldn't shake the nagging feeling that something was wrong. Not being able to touch her or talk to her was killing him. At least he knew that tonight, one way or another, he would be able see her.

Dan took another hit, and relaxed back into the couch, his eyes closing shut as he began to block out the rest of the world. Just when he was about to take his buzz to another level, he heard the door swing open. Dan instantly bolted upright, his reaction level surprisingly still in tact.

"Dan?" A confused Rufus Humphrey dropped his bags on the floor as he spied his son on the couch, bong in hand.

"Dad! What..I thought you were in Paris?!" He was unsure of what to do with the bong in his hand. It wasn't like he could suddenly hide it now.

"I was. But I seemed to be wearing out my welcome with your sister. Decided to fly on back. And now I've come home to find my son. Sitting on my couch. With a bong."

Dan wasn't sure how to read his father. He didn't seem mad. Just mystified.

"You know? I thought Lily was crazy when I received a long cryptic message from her regarding you a few days ago. Figured it was Lily simply being Lily. But as it turns out, maybe there is reason for concern." Dan swallowed nervously. "What did she tell you exactly..?"

"That I needed to have a long talk with you. I guess she was right." He then gestured to the bong.

Dan cautiously set the bong down on the table and ran his fingers through his hair. Where should he even start? "Um. This? I was just trying to relax." Rufus eyed his son quizzically as he finally shut the door to the loft. He took a step forward.

"I can see that, Dan. But why? Does something have you on edge?"

Dan gave him a wan smile. "I asked Serena for a divorce." Rufus nodded. He didn't seem too surprised, but his father was very even keeled. Even if he was surprised, he wouldn't normally come right out and say so. "Are you, uh, sure that's what you want, son? Did something happen to trigger this or-"

Dan figured he should come clean with Rufus. Well, somewhat clean. Not totally clean. "Our marriage just isn't working." He took a deep breath. "And I'm in love with someone else." He was somewhat relieved as the words came spilling out. He had wanted to be able to tell someone other than Jenny, whom he hadn't been responsible for telling in the first place.

Rufus nodded and his eyes flickered. "I'm guessing Serena didn't take the news too well?" Dan shook his head. "She didn't at first. And, well I didn't even tell her about-"

"The other woman you're in love with?" Rufus wasn't sure what to think. His son usually had a solid head on his shoulders, and he didn't normally jump into decisions without fully thinking about their outcomes. But he did have an overly romanticized view of the world. So when Dan mentioned another woman, it was very possible he was thinking with his heart rather than his head.

"Serena calmed down a bit when I accepted her offer to stay with her until the New Year." Rufus gave a confused look.

"Why would she want to do that?"

"I guess she thinks the marriage can still be salvaged," Dan quickly explained.

"So you're letting her cling to false hope, then? Dan-" Rufus sighed. He was disappointed in his son, and Dan was instantly regretting letting Rufus in on that minor tidbit of information.

"Dad, it's not that I'm trying to give her false hope," he explained. "It's just that I'm trying to keep everything as civil as possible. _She_ asked if we could stay a couple until the New Year. _She_ wanted to see if there was anything still there. And if a few more days was what she needed to potentially feel better about the breakup, then I was only too happy to give them to her. I know it's a twisted way to look at it but-"

"Dan. That makes no sense. She's just going to be that much more disappointed when you tell her you still want a divorce. By the way, have you actually...cheated on her?"

Dan gave his father a knowing look. Yes. Yes he had.

Rufus shook his head disapprovingly. "You know, when you married Serena, I have to say I was a bit surprised. You two reunited..and it seemed to come out of nowhere, really. If I recall, I'm pretty sure you were still harboring feelings for Blair back then." Dan nodded, trying not to give himself away completely at the mention of her name. But even his father knew back then. He had been in love with Blair when he married Serena. His feelings for her had never left. And now here he was, confessing to Rufus that it had been a mistake.

"I can't help but think how unfair this all is to Serena," Rufus continued. "Giving her false hope will only lead to bitterness and animosity later on down the road. Take it from me." Dan understood. He hated that his father was disappointed in him. He could only think about the toll his own mother's affair had taken on Rufus. Not to mention his little dalliance with Ivy Dickens and her subsequent betrayal. Whatever that was. Dan usually tried not to think about it.

Dan shrugged. "You're right. I just felt like I owed it to her somehow, I guess. Either way, after tonight it's all over. We're going to Eleanor Waldorf's New Year's party, and I'm going to talk to Serena afterwards. Tell her it's officially over." Dan shook his head. "This marriage..I don't know...something was missing from day one. There was just no-"

"Passion?" Rufus said, easily finishing Dan's thoughts for him.

"Exactly. No passion." Rufus nodded. He knew his son well. He didn't approve of Dan's tactics, or his cheating, but he understood.

Rufus looked at Dan. "I can only hope you know what you're doing, Dan. And that Serena will be able to move on from the hurt you're about to cause her." Those words sparked something in Dan. The truth was she had cheated on him, too. He was prepared to take his medicine from Rufus, but it wasn't as simple as, "Dan cheated." Rufus needed to know about Serena. Even if her cheating wasn't the reason he wanted a divorce. Dan took a deep breath.

"You know, Dad... Serena cheated on me, too. In fact she cheated first." Dan looked at Rufus, knowing that he must sound like a tattle tale about now.

Rufus raised his eyebrows in legitimate surprise. This was a whole lot of information to be welcomed home with after a long flight. He took a seat on the couch next to Dan.

"I guess that kind of changes things. You must not have been too upset, or it seems you would have shared that piece of information first. Were you..just not upset?"

Dan shook his head. "Nope."

"What did you say when she told you about it?" Dan gave his father a knowing smile.

Dan shrugged. "She didn't tell me. In fact, she still doesn't know that I know."

Rufus gave his son a confused look. "So how do you know then..."

Dan contemplated for a moment just how much information he wanted to reveal on that topic. He decided to tell his father the half truth. The one that didn't involve him and Blair standing partially naked in Nate's guest house closet.

"Nate told me."

Rufus digested the information, then followed up with another question. "Oh. Well how did Nate know?" Rufus was more confused than ever when all Dan could do was grin right back at him.

And after a minute Rufus finally understood.

"I see. Wow. So Nate. And Serena." Dan nodded as Rufus let the information continue to seep in. "Wow."

"Dan. You can pass me that bong, now."

* * *

Chuck sat in his office at Bass Industries and perused his email. There it was. The correspondence that Chuck had been waiting for, although he hadn't been expecting it this soon. He smiled. His investigator, Rich, had put together a supposed timeline of Blair's meet ups with Dan Humphrey.

Chuck looked it over quickly: Spottings of the pair at different coffee shops in Brooklyn. No photographic evidence. He was spotted getting into a town car, which he seemed to have leased using an alias. Chuck shook his head again. It would seem Humphrey was a bit of a schemer after all.

The town car destination had been a bed and breakfast just outside the city on the Hudson River. Rich had spoken to a woman named Margie who was apparently one intractable broad. She harbored some loyalty to "Cedric Donohue," and refused to answer any questions in regard to him or his many stays there, including whether or not he had guests accompany him. "Multiple stays," Chuck said out loud to himself. "And no fucking photographic evidence." What the hell was he paying Rich for?

The only other piece of evidence Rich could come up with was an eyewitness saying she saw Dan and Blair flirting at a party. But still, there was no proof. And flirting didn't necessarily equate to banging. There was nothing here that would hold up in a court of law, if it happened to come to that.

Chuck slammed his hand on the desk and picked up the phone. He dialed Serena and she answered on the first ring.

"Chuck, I'm in the middle of a hot stone massage right now. Can this wait?" Chuck rolled his eyes and cut right to the chase.

"How's it going with Dan?"

"Honestly, Chuck," Serena sighed. "Not great. I'm resigned to the fact that I'll soon be a divorced woman. I guess it's true we all end up like our mothers eventually. Anyway, I made reservations at Campagnola before the party. I guess we'll probably talk about...everything then." Chuck leaned back in his chair. He didn't think Humphrey had it in him to divorce Serena van Der Woodsen. But if he even thought he had a shot at replacing her with Blair, he was going to need to think again. Blair was currently unavailable, and would continue to be unavailable for the foreseeable future.

"Well, as long as you can say you tried everything you could," Chuck responded, trying one last manipulation tactic. "Since you're breaking up, maybe you guys should just skip the party and keep the New Year low key."

"What? No. Why would I want to do that? Dan and I decided that no matter what we wanted to end things on a happy note. A party sounds like the way to do it."

Chuck propped his feet up on his desk.

"Are you sure you want to spend the entire evening answering questions about when your marriage first started to unravel. But then also reassuring people that you and your ex are going to continue to be the best of friends? Don't you think that might get a bit...depressing."

"It's not as if everyone knows, Chuck. Just you, my mother, and Blair. I'm assuming you did tell Blair."

"Nate as well. And actually, I didn't have to tell Blair. She already knew," Chuck corrected her. "So who knows how many others she's informed?" Chuck added.

"So if you didn't tell her. And I didn't tell her..." Chuck smiled to himself.

"Nate?" Serena shrugged.

"Good try. But nope. Not Nate." Chuck could hear Serena's frustration growing from the other end of the line.

"I'll just hang up and let you think on that for a minute, Sis..." Before she could get another word in, Chuck hung up the phone. "Chuck!" She sighed, exasperated.

Serena rested her head back down onto the table as her masseuse went back to work. She closed her eyes. The only other person left who could have told her was Dan.

Dan. Was it really that big of a deal if Dan had talked to Blair? What was Chuck trying to insinuate?

She'd have to think about that later. Right now she had a lot of tension in her neck and shoulders.

"Well, I still can't believe Serena and that boy are getting a divorce. Blair, darling. Aren't you going to eat?" Eleanor Waldorf looked up from her paper as they sat together in Blair's kitchen. "You're going to need your strength tonight when we "schmooze" those buyers."

Blair took a quick bite of her blueberry yogurt, then instantly spit it back out. She hadn't been feeling well the past few days. Not since Chuck had guilt tripped her and basically told her she was a horrible mother for having a bit too much to drink on Christmas. She also missed Dan.

Eleanor once again looked over at her daughter. "You're looking very peaked, Blair. Are you sure you're not-"

"Very sure, mother," Blair interrupted before she could even get the words out. "And I think you understand what I mean." Blair forced a smile. She was positive she wasn't pregnant. She hadn't slept with Chuck in months. And she'd only been sleeping with Dan for about three weeks. _And_ she was on the pill.

"So you and Chuck..things are..well I just noticed things were a little chilly between the two of you at dinner the other night."

Blair rolled her eyes. "I don't want to discuss it. And I am sorry to completely disappoint you, but despite Chuck's insistence, there are no current plans to bring another Bass child into the world anytime soon. Now. Tell me again why Cyrus didn't accompany you?"

Eleanor set her paper down and removed her glasses. "Blair, I'm concerned. I heard about Christmas brunch at the Plaza."

Blair sighed. "Chuck was exaggerating. I didn't even have that much to drink," Blair explained as she took a sip of her tea. "I'm just really stressed with..with work. And you're having me redo the whole line and then there's Henry and his tantrums."

Eleanor raised an eyebrow. "Well, I don't think Chuck _was_ exaggerating, dear. Because I heard about it from Lily." Blair shook her head. She had just given her mother a perfectly plausible explanation for her behavior on Christmas, but she was going to take Lily's word for it?

"As if Lily has room to talk. Honestly. I have reservations about letting Henry even sleep over with her." Eleanor eyed her daughter closely and took a sip of her coffee.

"That's not all, Blair." Blair inhaled, bracing herself for what could possibly pop out of her mother's mouth next. There was absolutely no telling.

"Dorota showed me the bottle. The empty bottle of Dom. That you apparently drank alone. Here. On Christmas night." Blair shook her head. Was_ everyone_ around here trying to make her look bad? She could not believe Dorota had ratted her out.

Eleanor seemed to read her thoughts. "She was concerned, Blair. As we all are. I spoke with Chuck. We agreed that the best thing for you to do, after tonight's party of course, is to take a little break from Waldorf Designs. Chuck thinks a little getaway might be in order. And Henry can come and stay with me for a while."

"So, you and Chuck are just deciding things for me now? I get no say?" Blair crossed her arms in disbelief.

"Darling. This is for your own good. I need you to be mentally refreshed and rejuvenated for Spring. I cannot have you stressed out. Or drunk! Or ill! So if you want to continue on as CEO of my company, you will take my suggestion."

Blair thought about it for a second. Maybe she didn't want to be the CEO of WD any longer. What would her mother say if she told her that? They were interrupted by the sound of Eleanor's phone ringing and she quickly answered it. "Hello Cyrus, darling. Blair was just saying how she wishes you were here with us." Blair scowled as her mother got up from the table and walked into the other room. It was honestly the first time she'd had space to herself since her mother arrived. If it wasn't her mother smothering her it was Chuck or Dorota. She quickly grabbed her purse and pulled out her "Dan" phone. She sent off a text. _"I'm in hell. Are you coming tonight?" _

Blair grew agitated when it took Dan a while to respond.

_"Absoloooootely. I just made like this entire rap up in my head. And now my teeth feel stronger."_

Blair analyzed the text for a moment before responding.

_"Dan?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Are you high right now?"_

_"Yeah."_

Blair rolled her eyes. She needed sober Dan and she needed him now. She wanted to kill Nate Archibald.

_"I'll just talk to you later."_

No sooner had Blair placed the phone back in her purse than Chuck came walking in the door.

"There's my beautiful wife," he said as he leaned in to place a kiss on Blair's cheek. He swiped a grape off of her plate. "How goes the last minute party detailing?"

"It _goes_ well. Almost as well as you and my mother booking trips for me without my consent."

Chuck smiled. "Well, we both know how stressed you've been. And since it's a direct order from the owner of your company, I think you'd be wise to obey her." He grabbed another grape from her plate and popped it into his mouth. "Besides, I think you're going to enjoy the destination I've selected for us. You're definitely going to need to pack for a tropical climate. That means lots of sunscreen. And lots of string bikinis. Or.. nothing at all if you prefer. It will be less work for me." Blair glared at him. Something was up with him. He was being extra disgusting today.

"Well, Cyrus sends his love," Eleanor sang out as she returned to the kitchen table. "He's sorry he couldn't be here, but his mother decided to hang around Paris for another week." Eleanor made a face as she sat down and replaced her napkin into her lap.

"Hello, Chuck. Everything going okay at Bass? You know it's true that CEO's never get a day off." Chuck nodded in agreement.

"Just had to wrap up a few things. Send some emails. Make sure we're all ready to start a fresh new year. What time will you two be heading over to the penthouse?"

"Well first, we have to stop by the Atelier. Then it's off to the penthouse. Where I can only hope Dorota has everything under control," Eleanor explained.

"And what time do the guests arrive?" Chuck asked.

"Seven-ish. Although I'm sure the younger ones will arrive later and the older ones will leave well before midnight," Eleanor laughed.

"Well, I'm meeting Nate for drinks at Campagnola beforehand, but we'll be over subsequently. Just a little business to discuss, first." Blair gave him a dubious look. Drinks? At Campagnola?

"Darling, Chuck showed me that stunning Emerald necklace he bought you for Christmas. It will go perfectly with the dress I've selected for you tonight." Blair turned to face her mother.

"I'm not five, mother. I think I can dress myself." Blair shoved a spoonful of yogurt into her mouth and forced it to do down this time. She wanted to spit it out so badly, her eyes were practically rolling back into her head.

"I know, dear. But I wanted the perfect dress to highlight that gorgeous necklace. So I-" That was it. Blair couldn't hold it down any longer. Eleanor and Chuck watched as Blair grabbed her stomach, leapt up from her chair, and sprinted up the stairs. She didn't stop until she reached the bathroom. She then proceeded to empty all contents of her stomach into the toilet.

Afterwards, Blair sighed in relief. It was the best she'd felt in days.

Back downstairs, Eleanor leaned into Chuck. "You know, I don't think this trip could have come at a better time." A concerned Chuck could only nod in agreement.

* * *

"Serena. You're here. Why...are you here?" Dan had just woken up from a nap when he heard a knock at the door. Serena, decked out in a black mini dress, took off her coat and handed it to Dan. She giggled at the sight of his bed head and wrinkled t-shirt. Then she got a whiff of him. And the loft.

"Dan? Have you been smoking pot?"

"No." Dan answered quickly. "I mean, just now? No. I wasn't smoking anything just now. I just took a nap."

"Well then, were you smoking pot earlier?" she asked as she walked past him and made herself at home on the couch. Dan quickly looked around for Rufus, but noticed that his door was shut. He was probably passed out on his bed.

"Your eyes are red. I think you need to hop in the shower so we can go." Dan was still a bit disoriented, and now Serena was barking orders at him. Not cool.

"Go? What time is it, exactly?" Dan pondered aloud.

"It's six, Dan. We have a reservation at Campagnola at seven. So get to stepping." A reservation? Dan didn't remember anything about a dinner reservation. He thought they were going to the Waldorf's.

"What about the party?" Dan inquired. Serena shrugged. "I don't know. Do you really want to go to that? Probably going to be a lot of fashion people. I know how you love those," Serena added sarcastically.

"Serena, I thought the whole point was that we...go out with a bang? Wasn't the party where we were supposed to be seen doing that?"

"People can see us doing that at Campagnola. Besides. What if..." Dan swallowed hard. He knew that look.

"This isn't the end of anything. What if this is a new beginning?" Dan couldn't believe this was even still a question. Had he not made his point these past few days?

"Serena-"

"Dan... You. Shower. Now." Dan did not appreciate the condescending tone. A dinner reservation hadn't been party of the plan. He supposed he would have to explain the whole divorce thing again to her in the car later.

Dan looked around for his phone. He couldn't take the chance that she'd look at it while he was in the shower. He looked down and noticed that he had apparently texted with Blair a few hours ago. Dan had no recollection of it. He rolled his eyes. He was definitely on another plane when writing those texts. He hadn't heard from her in days, and that's how he'd responded to her? Dan could only imagine what Blair was thinking.

Dan gave Serena an unenthusiastic nod, then disappeared into the bathroom. While waiting for Dan to shower, Serena got up and had a look around. She wasn't thrilled that she now smelled like pot, but at least Dan was relaxed now. Maybe this could work in her favor?

She noticed Dan's laptop sitting on the coffee table. Serena casually made her way over to it and had a seat on the couch. She looked up as she heard the sound of the shower sprayer come on.

Serena cautiously opened the computer. She noticed a number of folders with various, generic names on the desktop. "Spec One." "Proposal Two." "First Draft-Untitled Two." "Untitled Three-Second Draft."

Then she noticed another folder curiously marked with the letter "X." She thought twice before opening it, but finally succumbed. Inside she found a number of documents, but one name in particular caught her eye. It was simply titled, "Champagne." Serena listened to the sound of running water for a moment. Dan was safe and sound in the shower, she told herself. Dan loved his showers. He would be a while. Besides, she was just interested in his work, she rationalized.

Serena finally clicked on it and the document magically opened. She started to skim parts of it, surprised...and not quite sure what to make of it.

"_I see the gleam in your dark eyes...and the devil in your smile...while the river of liquid drowned your breasts and parted your thighs...and when our bodies came together...I drank from that river...I knew at that moment I would never thirst for anyone else again." _

What the fuck?

"Serena?" Serena jolted at the sight of Rufus Humphrey standing in front of her. She slammed the computer shut and immediately stood up.

"Rufus. I had..I had no idea you were..." Rufus eyed his daughter in law suspiciously, then looked at the laptop. "Checking your email?" Serena nodded sheepishly and Rufus took a step towards her.

"Look, Serena. I just wanted to say, I'm glad you and Dan are being so civil about this whole thing. I had my doubts. But being able to end your marriage amicably can only benefit everyone." Rufus gave her a cool smile. Serena couldn't be certain, but Rufus's statement seemed to be riddled with subtext.

Serena nodded silently and watched as he turned back around, returning to his bedroom. She sat down on the couch as she contemplated the conversation.

Then she collapsed even further into the couch. Exactly whose breasts and thighs was her husband was writing about?

* * *

"So why'd you want to come here first?" Nate asked as he nursed a martini.

Chuck looked around the restaurant, but saw no sign of Dan or Serena. "I just figured we could catch up here before being subjected to the dangerous world of Waldorf couture. I'm not necessarily looking forward to a night of hobnobbing it with fashion bigwigs. Unless they happen to be models. And since I've seen the guest list and there was no sign of Karlie Kloss..."

"That does kind of suck," Nate agreed as he took a sip of his drink.

"So how's Blair been? I haven't seen her in forever."

"Stressed," Chuck replied curtly. "We're getting out of town tonight after the party. Eleanor thinks it will be good for her to take some time off. Seems she's been spreading herself...a bit thin," Chuck said pointedly as he took a swig of his Scotch. Nate never could catch a double entendre. Chuck gestured to the bartender to hit him up again.

Nate looked up to see a hostess seating Serena and Dan. "Hey, look. The Humphries. Or ex Humphries. I'm not sure what you're supposed to call people who are divorcing. I guess it's kind of nice that they're still dining together."

Dan sighed as he had a seat. He was more than ready to get this night over with. Serena had been noticeably quiet on the ride over. Dan hoped that maybe it was starting to sink in. After tonight, it was all over. He did a quick scan of the room, and quickly stopped on two familiar faces standing at the bar. The faces happened to be staring right back at him. Nate was giving him a big toothy grin, while Chuck was wearing his typical, arrogant smirk. Chuck raised his glass up at him and Dan nodded.

"Prick," Dan mumbled underneath his breath.

"Did you say something?" Serena asked, looking up from her menu. Dan nodded in the direction of Chuck and Nate and she turned around.

"Chuck?" Serena immediately pushed her chair back and walked over to the bar. Dan watched her curiously. She didn't seem that surprised to see Chuck or Nate, but she did seem a little annoyed.

"Chuck. What are you doing here?" she questioned as she approached the bar.

"Relax. Nathaniel and I are just having drinks before heading over to Eleanor's party," he explained.

"Oh really? That's interesting, considering there are literally thousands of restaurants and bars in this city, and you decided to come to the one you knew Dan and I were dining at."

"You knew they were going to be here?" Nate chimed in.

"It's New Year's Eve, Serena. This place was close by and not too terribly crowded. Nice ambience. But if you're bothered by our presence here, Nathaniel and I will be on our way. Will we be seeing you two later at the penthouse?" Serena still hadn't made up her mind whether or not she wanted to attend the party. She wasn't feeling so hot after snooping on Dan's computer.

"I don't know." She looked behind her to see Dan staring at them. "I'm not sure I feel up to going anymore." Chuck gave her a supportive nod, then looked over at Dan seated at the table. "Probably best you two just take the night to discuss things," he said as he took a swig from his tumbler.

"I take it Dan isn't feeling very sociable this evening?" Chuck asked. Serena shrugged, still agitated. She knew Chuck had come here on purpose. She just wasn't sure why.

At the table, Dan was pretending to read the menu, but his ears were definitely burning.

"Well I think it's cool that you two can still get along," Nate suddenly piped in as he swirled his martini. "Dining on New Year's. It's good to see considering...you know. Everything.."

"You mean considering Dan wants a divorce?" Serena scoffed. Chuck was right. She couldn't possibly endure a whole night of this kind of talk at Eleanor's.

"Divorce isn't a certainty yet, Nathaniel. I'm sure Serena still has a few more tricks up her sleeve." Chuck gave a pointed smile at his step-sister while he laid some money down for the bartender.

"Oh! So you're trying to work things out, then?" Nate looked up, surprised. "That's great! I really thought Dan had his mind made up, especially after finding out about our..you know..." Serena looked at Nate in horror. A huge smile crept upon Chuck's face. "I think that's my cue," he chuckled. "I'm just going to go say hello to my good friend, Dan." Chuck gave Nate a supportive pat on the back as he walked off.

As soon as Chuck was out of earshot, Serena turned to Nate. She felt like she'd been punched in the gut. "Tell me I heard you wrong, Nate. You..you didn't tell Dan about us. Tell me you didn't!" Nate was starting to realize that there was an extreme lack of communication going on within his circle of friends. Why would Dan bother keeping that piece of information to himself, especially with divorce on the horizon? It didn't make sense.

Nate's silence said it all. "And Chuck knows, too! Nate..." Serena was starting to shake. She was angry and disappointed with Nate, but also disappointed with herself. She wasn't sure what to do. Should she slap Nate for his inability to keep his damn mouth shut? Confront Dan on why he hadn't confronted _her_ about her affair? Or maybe she should just punch Chuck in the gut for entertaining himself at her expense? She turned to see that Chuck had finally made his way to their table.

"Humphrey. Happy New Year." Dan looked up to see the person he dreaded most standing before him. "You too Chuck."

"So you and my sis are trying to work things out? That's an excellent decision." Dan furrowed his brow. At this point, the last thing he wanted to do was get into a conversation with Chuck Bass. "Well, Chuck. That's rather personal. But I'm sure Serena appreciates your support."

Chuck smirked. "You're right, Humphrey. It _is _personal." Dan noticed something extra sinister in Chuck's tone. It felt like a warning. Or rather a threat. He suddenly had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach that Chuck knew. Dan said nothing in response, just reached for his water glass.

"Well," Chuck continued. Serena was on her way back to the table. "I'm truly sorry the two of you won't be making it to the party tonight. Serena just informed me that you have things to discuss. Maybe we should all get together when Blair and I get back from our trip?" Serena had a seat. Chuck nodded to Dan, then to Serena. "Have a pleasant evening." Dan continued to focus in on his water glass as Serena watched Chuck walk back over to Nate. They both then headed out the door.

"What was that about?" Dan asked cautiously, referring to her conversation with Nate and Chuck. He knew he had to tread lightly.

Serena seemed pained as she listlessly reached for her water glass. Dan was now certain they were about to crossover into uncomfortable conversation territory. He was about to find out if she knew about Blair.

She took a sip of her water. "I know you know," she whispered. Dan leaned in closer, then swallowed hard. "Well, Serena. I'll tell you a little secret. If Nate knows, then everybody usually knows."

"You didn't say anything." Dan shrugged. As predicted, she was confused by his non reaction. The good news was, this conversation was going to focus strictly on Nate and Serena. No mention of Blair thus far. And he knew Serena wouldn't be acting this remorseful if she knew.

"Serena, when Nate told me about the two of you, our marriage was already over. Finding out about your little tryst had no bearing whatsoever on my decision to ask you for a divorce. I didn't even find out about it until the day after Nate's Christmas party. When I was staying in his guest house. I even told Nate you two should have another go at it." Serena shook her head solemnly.

"You told Nate..." she looked up, as if reality had just set in. There was a long pause. Dan watched her for a moment, then began to swirl his water glass around on the table.

"You really don't love me do you?" she said softly. Dan switched over to tinker with his salad fork. "Did you ever love me?" she asked. Dan didn't speak. So much for a painless divorce.

"I see. Well..." Dan watched as tears started to form in the corners of her eyes. He knew it was hypocritical of him not to tell her he had cheated, too. But he was just ready to call it a night. He had tried to let her down easy before, but she simply wouldn't let go. Dan wasn't going to even bring up the affair. He watched as Serena slowly stood up. She walked to the front of the restaurant, collected her coat, and walked out the door.

Dan sat in silence for a few minutes, wondering if there could have possibly been any other way to handle it. A waiter came by to ask if he was ready to order and if his guest would be returning. "No," Dan answered. The waiter nodded and walked off.

He wasn't actually sure what his next move should be. He didn't think Serena would go to the Waldorf's party, but he wasn't positive. Blair was expecting him to come, but then there was an excellent chance that Chuck would be there waiting on him to exact revenge. He wasn't exactly positive that Chuck knew about him and Blair, but the way he was talking sure made it seem like he knew something. And he and Blair were going out of town? Yeah, he definitely knew. Dan had no choice. He had to go to the party. He had to go to Blair.

* * *

The party was in full swing when Dan arrived at the Waldorf's penthouse just a little after ten. It had taken him a while to get there. He decided he wanted to give Blair her Christmas gift tonight, but the subways were absolutely packed to and from Brooklyn. Dan figured if they were about to go up in flames, at least a gift might cushion the blow.

Dan was extremely apprehensive, and with good reason. The truth was he had absolutely no idea what he was about to encounter once he walked into that party. Chuck was a loose cannon, and with word about to spread about his marriage to Serena going down the toilet, Dan might soon be on the receiving end of some hostile looks.

Dan walked in to see a typical New Year's party in full swing. The penthouse was crowded and festive, and the piano was playing some up tempo jazz numbers. A few people were dancing, but most were simply drinking champagne and mingling. He instantly spotted Eleanor, bending the ear of some important looking, fashion-y people. He spotted Chuck standing near the bar with someone who looked to be a business associate. Lily was laughing with two other women in the corner, champagne flute in hand.

Dan saw no sign of Blair, though he knew it probably wouldn't be wise to make a beeline directly towards her anyway. He pulled out her gift which had been tucked snuggly inside his jacket and which he had promptly discarded and left with the attendant. Dan immediately looked around for a safe place to stow it. The laundry room probably wouldn't have much traffic tonight, he decided. He quickly made his way through the kitchen en route to the laundry room where he stashed it in a drawer. He then made his way back out to the party and looked around for Nate.

Nate was probably going to be his best bet for someone to mingle with at this point. Maybe Nate could even shed some light on where exactly Chuck's head was these days.

Dan started to make his way through the crowd, but completely stopped when he caught the image of Blair, peering out the window, drink in hand. He took in the vision of her from behind. She shimmered in a silver gown, setting her apart from every other woman in the room. Her hair was pulled up to reveal her smooth, pristine neck. From this vantage point, the only thing marring her appearance was that damned Emerald necklace on her neck, which Chuck was apparently forcing her to wear at every opportunity. Dan took a few steps toward her. Her face was now fully visible to him and all he could think was how completely lost she looked. He took a deep breath. As he continued to discreetly walk in her direction, a hand reached out and grabbed his shoulder. Dan slowly turned around and heaved a huge sigh of relief when he saw it was Nate standing before him, and not Chuck.

"So..Serena didn't come?" Nate asked curiously. "I feel like shit. I thought you would have told her you knew..." Dan shrugged, trying his best to focus on Nate and not let his attention drift back over to Blair.

"No, I didn't see the point. It wasn't the reason I wanted a divorce in the first place. But now Serena and I are officially done. So, you know..." Nate gave his friend a concerned look. "You were just trying to be nice, weren't you? I knew it. Since that day at the Christmas party I knew. I mean, Chuck kept saying that Serena would have her way with you, whatever that means. But I tried to tell him, you just weren't that into her anymore. It happens, I suppose."

"Yep. Chuck was wrong. Wouldn't be the first time."

"Hey, you want a drink, man?" Nate asked, noticing a lack of glass in Dan's hand. Dan nodded politely. Nate dashed off and Dan looked up to see that Blair was now looking at him. He wondered how long she'd been watching. She suddenly smiled and Dan's heart skipped a beat. He took a deep breath and smiled back at her, then nodded in the direction of the kitchen. Understanding him completely, Blair cautiously looked around to see if anyone had witnessed their interaction. She watched as Dan made his way through the crowd, giving him a minute so no one would suspect anything. Blair looked over to see that Chuck was still engrossed in conversation with one of his investors, and her mother was still talking to the Bendel's buyers. Nope. Blair wasn't pulling her weight at all during this business slash social event her mother had organized, but it didn't seem to matter. Eleanor had them all wrapped around her finger.

Blair passed through the foyer and entered the kitchen. She seemed to have lost Dan. She did a full three sixty, until she finally heard a "Psst" coming from the direction of the laundry room. Blair tentatively opened the door, and felt a hand quickly wrap around her wrist to pull her inside as the door shut behind her.

"Hey," a low voice whispered into her ear.

She looked up at Dan and smiled. "Hey." Blair slowly began to run her finger down his lapel. "Did you have fun with your bong?" Dan laughed, but his facial expression quickly turned serious. Blair picked up on it immediately.

"What's wrong?" Blair asked.

Dan ran his fingers down her cheek. "I think Chuck knows," Dan said calmly. Blair's smile dissipated.

"Oh. Why? Did he say something to you?"

"No. Well...nothing directly. But Serena and I were about to have dinner at Campagnola earlier, and Chuck and Nate were there, too." Blair gave him a weird look. "I know what you're thinking, but it wasn't like that. At least not on my end. From talking to Nate just now, I think Chuck was encouraging Serena this week to fight the divorce. Why would he feel the need to do that? Since when does he care about anyone else's relationship but his own? The only reason I can think of is-"

"Because he wanted to keep you away from me. And it worked. He and my mother have been in cahoots all week, even planning a trip behind my back. But, Dan, where did we slip up? I thought we were careful. Well, maybe not on Christmas night but the other times...I mean we even had aliases!"

"We knew he was having you followed, Blair. This shouldn't really come as a complete surprise. And he made some comments at the restaurant that were directed towards me. He also made a point of telling me the two of you were going out of town." Dan watched Blair for a moment, knowing she was probably coming to the same conclusion he had already come to.

"The point is Blair, there's no point in trying to keep this a secret anymore. And I don't..." Dan was starting to get emotional.

"What, Dan?" Blair asked as she reached for his hands.

"I don't want you going anywhere with him," Dan answered softly, as he started to caress her hands in his. "I don't trust him, Blair." Blair's doe eyes peered up at Dan's, and she felt safer than she ever had before.

"Okay," Blair replied. "I won't. This will be all over tonight. Trust me." Dan exhaled with relief as he wrapped a single hand around her waist and pulled her in closely to him. "Dan. My mother's probably-"

"I know. You have to..just wait, though..." Dan reached down in the drawer where he had stashed Blair's gift. He pulled out the box with the green bow and handed it to her. She looked up at him, confused. "What..is this?"

"Late Christmas gift." Blair frowned. "I didn't-"

"I think Christmas night was probably the best night of my life. So call us even." Blair smiled as she eagerly untied the bow and tore into the paper. Her eyes lit up at sight of a very old, very fragile copy of "Anna Karenina."

"Dan. This is-" She was genuinely touched. It was the most thoughtful gift she'd ever received. "Thank you," she said softly, running her fingers down the delicate binding. "So much."

"I know it's not an emerald necklace but-" Blair laughed and immediately stood up on her toes to kiss Dan, pulling his head down to meet hers. As their lips parted Blair looked up at him, taking a step back. "Dan. It just occurred to me that after tonight, everything will be completely different." Before Dan could ask her exactly what she meant by that, she opened the door to the laundry room and exited, disappearing up the back stairwell, book in hand. She wasn't smiling, but she wasn't frowning, but she seemed transformed somehow.

Dan wondered if he should be worried or relieved.

Dan cautiously made his way back out to the party and looked around for Nate. He was probably wondering where'd he'd disappeared to while he had gone to fetch him a drink. Dan did a quick scan of the room, and came face to face with...Chuck. He stood only inches away.

"Humphrey. I honestly didn't think I'd be seeing you here tonight. I take it you must have found a way to appeal to Serena, then? She expressed no desire to come here at all earlier." A confused Dan looked around and spied Serena sitting on the couch, talking to Nate. She had actually come. Dan couldn't believe it.

"Chuck, I can assure you that I had absolutely nothing to do with getting Serena here. She came on her own." At that moment, Dan watched as Blair re-entered the party, looking happy and refreshed. Chuck's eyes followed Dan's gaze and soon they were both watching Blair work the room, greeting and mingling. Chuck turned his attention back to Dan.

"Humphrey. What exactly do you think you're doing?" he asked sharply. Dan turned to face Chuck.

He wasn't necessarily looking for a throw down with Chuck, but here he was answering the call.

"Don't you know it's not polite to stare at other men's _wives_?" Dan smiled at the question, never taking his eyes off of Blair.

"Blair is breathtaking tonight, don't you think, Chuck?" Dan knew he was about to get the rise he desired out of his sworn enemy. Chuck's eyes narrowed as Dan gave him a smirk. Dan knew Chuck had to be surprised that he was willing to go toe to toe with him.

"I think it's probably best if you leave now, Humphrey. Go peaceably or I'll call building security." Chuck calmly swirled his glass, not even bothering to make eye contact with Dan. Dan felt victorious. Resorting to "calling security" was the chicken's way out.

"Well, Blair invited me," Dan explained. "I think it'd be rude if I were to leave now. It's not even midnight." Dan looked up to see Nate walking towards the two of them, two drinks in hand. He passed one to Dan. "Hey where'd you go? I had your drink and then you disappeared?" Nate smiled. He was a bit inebriated.

"I had some business to attend to if you know what I mean." Dan's provocation had hit Chuck right where it was meant to. He gave Chuck a wink for good measure and watched as his face turned beet red. With that, Chuck had had enough. Without warning, he suddenly lunged into Dan, pulling him in by the collar and getting in Dan's face. "Humphrey. You stay away from her!" With Nate's help, Dan managed to free himself from Chuck's grip as every guest in the room turned around to see what the commotion was about. Nate then grabbed Chuck by the arm and led him out of the party. Dan could still hear Chuck cursing him under his breath.

"I think _that_ one had too much to drink," Dan explained to a group of people who were standing nearby, raising his eyebrows. He immediately made eye contact with Blair, who seemed amused by the scene. He then caught sight of Serena who was sitting on the couch, sipping her champagne, and seemingly oblivious to the outburst-or perhaps she was in some sort of trance. Who could really tell? Dan then felt another set of eyes on him. Actually a double set. Lily and Eleanor were watching him and whispering between themselves, shaking their heads disapprovingly. He was sure Eleanor was probably confused as to why he was even here.

Dan probably should have taken that as his cue to leave. He'd already pissed a majority of the people off in the room. There was only one reason he had even come tonight, and he probably wouldn't even get to talk to her again. From across the room, he watched as Blair chatted up an older woman. Blair was lively and animated and confident. And perfect. Feeling his eyes glued on her, she once again turned to smile at Dan.

Nah, he decided. The least he could do was stick it out until midnight.

Dan spent the next hour and a half propped up against the wall, drinking champagne and gawking at the revelers. Sneaking peaks at Blair. The stuffy old buyers had loosened up, and there were significantly more people dancing than had been earlier. Chuck had come back to the party, significantly calmer, and thanks to Nate, was keeping his distance from Dan. No one had spoken to Dan since "the incident" though. Not that anyone but Nate was speaking to him _before_ the incident. Dan wondered if Chuck had even bothered to fill Nate in yet about him and Blair, or if he chalked up the outburst to something else.

Dan was exhausted as he started to reflect back on the day. It had been an eventful New Year's Eve, that's for sure. Hell it had been an eventful year. Never in a million years would have thought he would reconnect with Blair. Not after the way she'd treated him all those years ago. Not after she'd run back to Chuck for the millionth time.

And never did he think it would all culminate here.

He had absolutely no clue what the new year was going to bring. But as long as it was with Blair, he couldn't wait to find out. Dan checked his watch. It was five minutes til and waiters were rushing through, dispersing a new batch of champagne flutes to everyone. He watched as Serena made her way over to stand with Chuck and Nate, and continued to watch as Chuck looked around, presumably for Blair. Dan didn't see her either, but he did catch Chuck sending a piercing glare in his direction. Dan chose to ignore him.

Blair seemed to have completely disappeared. As the clock continued to tick down, everyone began to huddle around as closely to the grand piano as possible. A waiter brought Dan a fresh champagne flute and the room seemed to go into a frenzy as Eleanor Waldorf made her way towards the piano, clinking her glass in pronouncement of the countdown to midnight. "Here we go! And ten...nine..." The whole room immediately began counting down with her, except for Chuck, who was still glowering. Dan caught Nate elbowing him in the ribs, prodding him to get in the spirit. "Eight...Seven...Six..." Dan was suddenly wondering if perhaps Blair had already made her escape. "Five...Four..Three..TWO...ONE...HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

"Happy New Year, Humphrey," a voice calmly greeted him from over his shoulder. It was the sweetest sound in the world. Dan turned around to face Blair. Before he could say anything, though, her mouth snuck up on his. And before he knew what was happening, she had aggressively parted his lips with hers and was clashing her tongue with his. He couldn't help but to reciprocate, his hands gently working around to her backside, and down to her waist, clinching her tightly as she slid her hands up his lapels, over his shoulders, and to the back of his neck, grabbing his hair. Their mouths were impenetrably fused now, kissing and sucking, tongues dueling, lips battling. Both of them were gasping for air, their bodies getting hotter by the second as the friction continued to mount. Neither would be the first to pull away in this kiss to end all other New Year's Eve kisses.

Until finally, they had no choice.

The piano had stopped playing Auld Lang Syne. The room fell quiet. And that's when Blair and Dan turned around, out of breath, and realized that every pair of eyes in the room was on them.

Eleanor. Nate. Chuck. Lily. Serena. Waiters. Buyers. Business Associates.

Everyone.

And that's when Blair turned and smiled sweetly at the party guests, grabbed Dan's hand, and whispered in his ear.

"Run."


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Thanks to everyone again for your support for this story!**

Chapter 11

Dan gripped Blair's hand as they walked west down 96th street. Neither spoke. They were too busy letting what had just happened continue to sink in.

The people. The party. The mind numbing kiss...

The kiss had evoked stares of disbelief and gaping mouths. It hadn't been planned. It had just kind of...happened. And at that point, there was no time to think. Blair simply grabbed Dan's hand and pulled him towards the elevator. They rapidly made their way out of the party, blocking out the sound of Eleanor's voice calling out to Blair. It was all so surreal. Like they were watching themselves from the outside, or in some sort of movie. The story of Dan and Blair, two kids caught with their hands in the cookie jar, high on sugar, or rather in this case, each other, yet still desperate for more. In that critical moment they didn't even care that they had been caught red handed. Or that their spouses were in the room. Or that the world was looking on. And judging. It only added to that complicated feeling of danger and lust that had gripped them and urged them to keep going.

It was nothing short of intoxicating.

But...

Now there was a giant question mark about what came next. What exactly had they left in their wake? For Blair, fear and anxiety were starting to physically manifest. She bit her lip and tightly clinched Dan's hand, her nails digging into his palm so hard that she was probably drawing blood. Dan was in such a haze that he didn't even notice. He was still recalling the looks on everyone's faces as they flew out of the penthouse. The last person Dan remembered seeing was Chuck, who like the others, was absolutely dumbstruck. Livid, but dumbstruck.

Dan and Blair would have to answer for themselves eventually. But tonight felt like a turning point, at least to Dan. Even if the road they were turning down was dark and bumpy.

"What were we thinking, Dan? I mean what did we just do?" Blair was trembling as she finally broke the silence between them. He turned to look at her as they continued to walk.

"You were thinking, 'I love Dan Humphrey, and I want everyone in this room to know,' and I was thinking, 'I love Blair Waldorf, and _I_ want everyone in this room to know.'" Dan smiled, but Blair didn't seem to hear his words at all, or if she did, she didn't acknowledge it. She was now distracted and a bit agitated by the sounds of the New Year, reacting ambivalently to the cheers of drunken revelers walking past them every so often. Blair began to speed up her walk, leading Dan along with her.

"Blair. Where are we going?" Dan sighed, struggling to keep up with her. He knew she had no plan. When she failed to answer him, he tried a different approach.

"Blair. Stop. Just a second," he commanded, pulling her toward him and making her face him. "We need to figure out where we're going. We can't just walk the streets of Manhattan all night. It's freezing." Unfortunately for them, there was no time to grab a coat before making their great escape.

"I know, Dan!" Blair suddenly snapped. "And where exactly does one go after kamikaze'ing her entire life in front of the entire New York fashion community!" she screamed. Dan tried not to take offense. He noticed she was shivering even worse now-an unfortunate combination of anxiety and the freezing weather. He immediately took his suit jacket off and placed it around her shoulders, pulling her in closely to rub her arms in an attempt to warm her up.

"Okay. Just be calm. Everything is going to be fine. We just need to get out of the cold. You want to go to your apartment?" he suggested.

"I can't go to my apartment, Dan. Because what if Chuck shows up? Or my mother? Oh, God! I don't want to deal with them." Blair shut her eyes tightly.

"I'm fairly sure your mother and Chuck won't be going anywhere for a while. Or anybody else for that matter. We've given them plenty to discuss," Dan assured her as he cupped her face with his hands.

"What about that Inn?" Blair suddenly suggested, and a bit more calmly. "The one you took me to? We could go there." She looked up with pleading puppy dog eyes that made Dan melt.

He smiled. "I didn't think you like that place."

"It wasn't that terrible. I guess." Blair replied. Dan shook his head. "While, I'm sure Margie would love to have us back, it's New Year's Eve. The odds of getting any transportation out there tonight are slim to none. Plus they're probably booked up." Blair frowned. "Maybe with Dorota in Queens. Henry's with her tonight."

"Is that what you want to do, Blair?" Dan didn't want to force her to go anywhere she didn't want to, and he certainly didn't want to keep her from seeing her son, but Dorota would be filled with questions if they suddenly appeared on her doorstep. They needed someplace where they could wait out the initial aftermath.

After a moment, she thought better of it. "Henry would be asleep. And I wouldn't want to alarm Dorota."

"I know you're not going to like this suggestion, Blair...but what about the loft? Rufus is there but-"

"Rufus? No. The last thing I want is to hear a sermon from Rufus. Let's just get a hotel."

"Blair. Listen to me. Every hotel room in this city has been booked up for months. Let's just go to the loft tonight. He's probably asleep now anyway, provided Lily hasn't called and chewed him out about me yet. At least we can gather ourselves and figure out where to go from here." Dan leaned in to kiss Blair on the forehead.

She looked up at him, and Dan knew she was starting to relent. "Fine," she said, as enthusiastically as she could manage. He pulled her hands up to his lips, blowing on them to create warmth. She laughed at the gesture. Dan was relieved to hear it.

"Blair?" Dan's tone turned serious, as he let her hands fall against his chest. "I need to know if... You don't...you don't regret it do you?" He paused for a moment, waited apprehensively for a reply.

She took a deep breath, and replied softly, "No. No regrets."

They stood there on the street, unmoving, eyes locked on each other, until a gust of wind came upon them, reminding them that they needed to get out of the cold. He pulled his phone out of his pocket. Curiously, not one message and not one missed call from anyone at the party. Not that he was expecting anyone to call him per se. But since Blair didn't have her phone on her and they knew she was with him...

Then again, they probably hadn't even realized yet that she didn't have her phone on her. Dan wrapped his arms tightly around Blair for extra warmth, leading her in the direction of the subway.

"What? The subway? NO! Dan...!"

"Don't worry, Blair. I'll protect you from the mole people."

* * *

Lily looked on while Eleanor's fourth attempted phone call to her daughter was once again unsuccessful. Blair's phone rang and rang before going to voicemail, and she left another message. "Blair! This is your mother! Again! You need to call me, young lady!"

The guests had cleared out quickly after Dan and Blair's spectacle. The look itself upon Eleanor's face had essentially done the trick. The only people left were caterers and waiters, who were now cleaning up. Chuck, Serena, and Nate were also still around somewhere. Lily and Eleanor had remained in the living room. Everyone was still trying to digest what they had just seen.

"What in the hell was she thinking?" Eleanor was pacing back and forth in front of Lily, pausing to throw her phone down in a chair. Lily calmly sipped on coffee, legs crossed elegantly on the couch. "I have no idea. Can I get you something? A valium, maybe?"

Eleanor shook her head. "No. I'm going to need all of my wits about me when Blair calls me back." Lily pursed her lips together, biting her tongue. She knew what Eleanor didn't. They were not going to be hearing from Blair or Dan tonight.

Eleanor was on her third glass of champagne in less than ten minutes, but it was doing nothing to calm her nerves. Her only child had just caused a monumental scene in front of the most important people in the fashion world. The scandal of it all was going to make Waldorf Designs the laughing stock of Manhattan. How could Blair do this to her? The wedding and abbreviated marriage to Louis had been bad enough, but the collateral damage had been fairly minimal. Especially since Chuck had paid her dowry. And Louis had made it look like Blair was crazy, but at least there had been no public kissing with another woman's husband. A woman who happened to be her best childhood friend.

"Kissing Daniel Humphrey. In front of every industry associate I have in Manhattan. I don't understand! Is she on drugs?"

"Well, I knew something was off with Blair at brunch last week. Like you said, maybe it's the stress. Perhaps this was a cry for help," Lily added as she leaned back into the couch. "You know, a stint in rehab might do her some good."

"This trip Chuck planned to the Seychelles was supposed to alleviate the stress. She was supposed to go and decompress there!" Eleanor collapsed on the couch next to Lily. "I just don't know... Maybe you're right. Maybe she needs professional help. Do you have some place you can recommend...?"

"I'll email you the information now." Lily smiled comfortingly as she began to scroll through her phone. "And I just feel bad for Charles and Serena. I just can't even imagine what they're feeling right now."

Eleanor glanced at Lily. Chuck and Serena "feelings" were the least of her problems right now. Her company was treading on thin ice.

"I think I'm going to call Rufus when I get home," Lily continued. "There are a few things-"

Eleanor looked up and interrupted. "You know, I will take that Valium." She understood the point Lily was trying to make in calling out Rufus. But if Rufus hadn't succeeded in raising Dan right, then Eleanor definitely hadn't succeeded with raising Blair.

* * *

Chuck walked cooly down the staircase, having just rummaged around in Blair's old bedroom. Among the things he found: an old copy of Anna Karenina lying on the bed along with Blair's purse, which harbored the two phones he was currently holding in his possession.

"I am going to fucking _ruin_ Dan Humphrey," Chuck announced between gritted teeth as he had a seat between Serena and Nate on the stairs. He grabbed his glass of Scotch that Nate had been holding for him, and took a long cool swig. Serena sat one step down from him, cradling her head in her hands.

"She left her purse. And her phone. Or rather, _phones_. Eleanor's already tried to call her four times. Dan Humphrey's obviously brainwashed her. That's the only way to explain any of this." Chuck was humiliated. It wouldn't be long before _all_ of Manhattan knew that his wife had kissed another man at the Waldorf New Year's Eve party. And not just kissed. Made out. And not just another man. Dan Humphrey. The bane of his existence.

He should have taken care of Humphrey when he had the chance, Chuck thought to himself. He would have loved to have beaten him to a pulp and given him a one way ticket to Lenox Hill. Instead, Nate had persuaded him to chill out and just keep his distance. Be the bigger man. If he had listened to his gut rather than to Nate, he and Blair would be on the Bass jet to the Seychelles right about now.

The new year wasn't looking so great for Chuck _or_ Serena.

"I just cannot believe this," Nate added. He was trying to be sympathetic to his friends, but there were just so many things he couldn't wrap his head around. "I mean, did they plan it? Or did it just happen in the excitement of the clock ticking down? Had they been seeing each other or was that just...I mean, there are so many things that don't make sense!" It had ended up being one of the most exciting New Year's parties Nate had ever attended.

"Jesus, Nate. Of course they've been seeing each other! You even supplied the love nest for some of their hook ups!" Chuck replied, more than a little put out with his best friend. Nate looked up with confusion as Chuck began to explain. "_Your_ guest house. _Your_ Christmas party. Any of it ring a bell, Nathaniel?" A tiny light bulb started to flicker on in Nate's head.

This got the attention of Serena. "I'm sorry. Nate's guest house?" She shook her head as she turned to look at Nate. "Blair and Dan were at your guest house the night of your Christmas party, Nate, and you didn't notice? Wait...that was the night..." Serena paused for a moment as she suddenly remembered coming onto him in the guesthouse bedroom. "So he asked me for a divorce, then screwed Blair afterwards?"

"Probably before, too," Nate added without thinking. "He did go missing for a while. And hey, you didn't notice, either," he suddenly remembered, as he attempted to defend himself. "We did both walk through every room. Maybe they were hiding in the closet." Serena shot him an icy glare and turned to face Chuck.

"Chuck. Just how long have you known?"

"How long have I known that Blair was seeing someone? A couple of weeks. But I didn't know it was your pathetic excuse for a husband until Nate helped me piece it all together last week." Nate looked up, confused. He must have been high at the time.

"I learned from my PI that Dan and Blair went to a bed and breakfast a few weeks ago," Chuck continued. "That could have been when it started but who knows? You were in Montecito. I was with Henry in Singapore. With neither of us around, it was the perfect opportunity to-" Chuck shrugged and took a another swig.

Serena thought about this new bit of information. The day she came back from Montecito, she knew Dan was acting weird. And she couldn't reach him for a good portion of the day either. And then there was her conversation with Blair-the one where she not so subtly advised her against having kids anytime soon.

Serena suddenly remembered their conversation at brunch. Blair was drunk, but she was essentially taunting her, throwing her relationship with Dan right in Serena's face. Serena hadn't even realized it. That little bitch...

"You didn't think to tell me that my husband was cheating on me with my best friend and your wife?" Serena blurted out angrily.

"I was trying to _fix_ the situation," Chuck snapped in his defense.

"Fix it how? Up until this afternoon you were encouraging me to get back with him. Look how well that worked out!" She suddenly remembered what she had read on Dan's computer.

"_The gleam in your dark eyes...and the devil in your smile when our bodies came together..."_

It was essentially porn. Porn he was writing about Blair. Dan was always writing about fucking Blair! "I think I want to throw up now!" Serena exclaimed.

"Well. I guess this explains why he wasn't even mad about me and Serena," Nate laughed. "This whole time he and Blair were-" Chuck and Serena simultaneously turned to glare at Nate.

"I am going to kill her!" Serena said as she rubbed her temples. "You know, Chuck?" She turned to face him. "This is all your fucking fault. If you hadn't been screwing everyone in sight, Blair wouldn't have needed to seek comfort from my husband!"

"Careful, Serena," Chuck warned. "You know what they say about those who live in glass houses."

"Okay. Okay. I think we just all need to calm down here," Nate suddenly interceded. "I get that everyone's a little hurt right now, but until you guys actually talk to them about...things." Nate wasn't really sure what to call it. Nate had cheated with Serena who had cheated on Dan who had cheated with Blair on Serena, who had cheated on Chuck who had cheated on Blair.

It was a giant clusterfuck.

"I'm just saying that no one is innocent here. Maybe we should just get some rest, then approach the situation with a fresh eye in the morning. I'll try to get a hold of Dan. Maybe we can all do breakfast or something at the house?" Nate looked up to see both Serena and Chuck scowling at him.

Or maybe not. Serena started to get up.

"I don't want breakfast! I just need to get the hell out of here!" Chuck and Nate watched as she grabbed her coat off the rack and pressed the elevator button. It arrived a few moments later and she quickly disappeared inside. Chuck took another slug of his scotch.

"Chuck." Nate heaved sighed. "I know that look on your face, man. I'm begging you, don't do anything you're going to regret. Remember you and Blair have Henry to think about. No matter what Blair's done, or what you've done..remember however you guys handle this is going to affect him." Nate was as sincere as he could possibly be.

"Don't worry Nathaniel," Chuck replied as he started to scroll through Dan and Blair's old text messages. "There will be no regrets."

* * *

Dan quietly opened the door to the loft, poking his head inside first to make sure Rufus was indeed asleep.

All clear.

He led Blair inside and she looked around. Everything looked exactly the same as she remembered. The blue couch was still there. The one where she had assured Dan that she wanted nothing more than to go to Rome with him for the summer. Right by his side. He had been having doubts about their relationship before then. He was threatened by Chuck, but she insisted to Dan that he had nothing to worry about where he was concerned. Rome was what she wanted. She had even sealed her declaration with a kiss to convince him. It turned out to be a lie.

Blair looked around the room. This was where she had come to Dan, telling him that Chuck no longer had her heart. That she wanted to be with him, and where they had shared their first official, electrically dizzifying kiss as a couple.

It was the same room where they had watched The Philadelphia Story countless times and where she had fallen asleep on Dan's shoulder. Where Blair would make herself at home on a stool at the kitchen island after barging in on him. Then, after some friendly banter, Dan would order her favorite gourmet pizza and they'd discuss Beuys and Nenette and Rosemary's Baby.

Brooklyn had been the safest of havens for her.

At least until that fateful day when Dan gave her an ultimatum. Serena had also been responsible for forcing her hand. She had exposed Blair's diaries to Dan. And Blair panicked.

She was being forced to make a decision that didn't need to be made. Rather than choosing to explore her blossoming feelings for Dan and allowing herself to be loved in a way she had never experienced, she reverted. She chose familiar. Old habits did truly died hard, and unfortunately Blair picked the relationship she thought she deserved.

Chuck had broken her heart more times than she cared to count. Their relationship had always been toxic. He had insulted her, called her names, forced himself on her, and cut her face in a drunken tirade when she told him she was marrying Louis. He had carried on with other women and thrown them in her face at every turn. He simply never put her first.

The night she chose Chuck over Dan, she went to him on the rooftop of the Empire. He had just lost his hotel to his father and he was needlessly cruel to her. She wanted to be there for him, and he turned her away. Again. This man...was the person she thought she deserved.

Dan watched Blair closely, taking in the distant look on her face and the tears percolating in her eyes. The memories, good and painful, were flooding through her.

"Blair. Don't think," he advised softly.

She looked up at him and smiled. He took her hand and started to lead her into his old bedroom. "Do you want anything to drink or..." She immediately shook her head no.

"I think I just want to lie down," she said quietly. Dan nodded as he opened the door to his old room. "Let me get you something to sleep in." Blair began to remove her necklace and earrings. And her rings-wedding band and engagement ring. She then slid off Dan's suit jacket. She watched as he rummaged around in his old dresser, pulling out one of his old plaid shirts. A red one. Blair grinned.

"Really, Humphrey?" He smiled and passed it over to her. She hesitantly accepted it, then cradled it against her. A look of mild discomfort suddenly fell upon her face.

"Um, you know, maybe I will have something to drink," she said almost apologetically. "Ginger ale, maybe?" Dan surveyed Blair with concern. She looked pale and tired. Everything was catching up with them and it was obviously taking its toll on her.

"Yeah. I'll uh...I'll go check and see what we got." Dan turned and quickly made his way out of the room, not wanting to leave her by herself for too long. He walked to the fridge and checked the contents-orange juice, expired milk, but no ginger ale. He reached for the juice, then looked around for some type of sustenance, though he didn't really expect to find much of anything considering his father had been out of the country. He peeked inside the cupboard and came face to face with a pack of saltines. It was better than nothing. He grabbed them, poured some juice into a glass, and headed back to his room.

He quietly opened the door as though not to startle her. Blair had already changed into his old shirt and turned out the light. She was now staring out the window. Her previously pinned up hair was now loose and hanging down freely around her shoulders, while the glow from the moonlight was illuminating her face. She seemed so innocent, standing there before him in nothing but his plaid shirt, looking just as she had several years earlier when she would sleep over. Her bare legs trembled beneath her. Dan walked over and handed her the glass of juice.

"Sorry. No ginger ale."

"It's fine," she nodded as she took a healthy sip. "I have crackers, too," Dan added. She crinkled her nose at the choice of snack and he quickly discarded them onto the nightstand. He watched with great interest as she continued to drink, chugging the entire glass down greedily.

"Refill?" Dan asked, amused. Blair shook her head no and placed the glass on the nightstand next to the crackers. She looked back up at him, then took a step forward, carefully bringing her arms up around his neck and resting her head upon his chest. He brought his arms around her waist to completely envelop her. They just stood there for a moment, holding each other, only the sounds of their breathing and a few random car horns registering in the otherwise silent night.

"Dan," Blair whispered, finally breaking the silence. "Tell me. Tell me again..." Dan pulled back for a moment to look down at her. Her face was pale and her lips were soft and pink-the lipstick had long worn off of them. Blair's eyes locked into his, pleading with him, begging for any words of comfort he could muster.

He sighed. "It's going to be fine, Blair." His eyes didn't move from hers as he raised a hand up to caress her cheek. Her eyes closed at the touch, and she leaned into his hand, never wanting him to stop. Her breathing was deepening and in that moment, he wanted nothing more than to take her, to lose himself inside of her completely.

But he wasn't sure it was the right thing to do. She didn't seem well. The best thing for her at this point, and for him as well, was to probably just get some sleep, especially considering everyone was going to be after their heads come morning. Plus, Rufus was there. It would definitely put a damper on things knowing he was just in the other room and within earshot.

She blinked her eyes up at him, still begging, before shutting them tightly again.

God. He wanted her so badly.

"I can be quiet," she said softly, as if reading his thoughts. She slowly opened her eyes to look at him. Her eyes were urging him to do something, anything... The ache they both felt wasn't going to subside unless they did something about it.

Dan took a deep, fortifying breath. He had no choice. His body needed hers too badly. Dan's mouth slowly moved onto Blair's lips and her eyes fluttered in response. His eyes never left hers, not wanting to miss her reaction as he deepened the kiss. Dan's lone aggressive maneuver on this night consisted of gripping the shirt he had given her and roughly pulling her body against his. Every other move would require tenderness and care.

As Blair's eyes slowly drifted shut, her head began to tilt backward and his lips began to gravitate downward to her neck and collarbone. She was giving him full access to do whatever he wanted to do to her. Whatever he needed to do. To take her however he wanted to take her. She was his now. Blair needed him to take the lead, to show him she trusted him in every possible way.

His lips were causing a variety of sensations, every touch of her skin getting her hotter and hotter.

Dan was already being excessively gentle with her, and he went agonizingly slow, taking care to leave his mark over every bit of skin he came in contact with. Sucking. Biting. Gnawing. He was addicted to the taste of her.

His hands slowly made their way up her back and around to the front of the plaid shirt so they could begin work on its buttons. He found her eyes again, refusing to break eye contact until every button had been freed, but he didn't remove the shirt.

Blair stood before him, vulnerable, in his old shirt which was much too big for her. He gazed down her body. Aided by the moonlight, it followed the exposed trail of skin visible from her neck all the way down to her white lace panties. He lifted his fingers to her neck, touching her along that same trail, slowly and deliberately, making frequent, exploratory stops along the way and eliciting tiny gasps from her each time. He pulled on the plaid shirt just barely, and one of her breasts revealed itself to him. Dan took a moment to play with it. It was soft and smooth, and fit perfectly in his hand. He began to play with the nipple, which turned erect as he massaged it with his knuckles. He quickly dove down to catch it in his teeth and she immediately let out another gasp.

Following the not so brief dalliance with her breast, Dan's fingers continued downward, his tips lightly skimming over her perfectly smooth, flat stomach, inching slowly downward until they reached the silky lace panties-the only obstacle separating her from him. He began to gently stroke her, gliding his fingers over the white silk. Dan then let his fingers slide underneath, dipping them inside of her. She grabbed his hand, encouraging him to push deeper. He continued to push inside her for a few moments, and she pushed back. Her body was starting to tremble. She bit her lip in an effort to stay quiet in response to what Dan's fingers were doing to her. Unable to help himself, he leaned in for another kiss. He started to remove his fingers out of her panties, needing to free them so he could unbutton his shirt. When he was finished, Dan grabbed Blair's hands and lifted them up to his chest, allowing her to assist him in pulling the shirt off. Together, their hands pushed it over his shoulders, tug by tug moving it down his body until it fell onto the floor. Blair's hands were now free to roam over Dan's chest and arms.

After a minute, he grabbed her arms and directed her backwards to the bed. He pushed her down gently so she was sitting on the edge and began kissing her neck and collarbone again, pulling the plaid shirt down on one side to expose one creamy pale shoulder. Blair watched with hooded eyes as suddenly stopped, stood up and removed his belt, shoes and pants, leaving only his boxers on. He kneeled back down before her and her legs began to slowly part before him. The image of her in nothing but his old shirt and a pair of white silk lace panties, sitting on his childhood bed. It was the most erotic thing he'd ever seen in his life.

Dan began to massage her stomach again, and he leaned in to kiss her there. his tongue following right behind to taste her while Blair let her fingers roam through his hair. Her head began to tilt backwards as Dan moved his hands down to grip her thighs, rubbing and massaging them. He began to place gentle kisses on the inside of each one, slowly and methodically. Blair leaned back on her elbows to give him even better access, spreading her legs for him even more. She did her best to stifle a moan as he kissed his way up her thighs, holding her in place at the knees until he reached the center of her panties. He began to kiss her right through the lace and she immediately bucked up against him. Encouraged by the response, he went in for more, kissing her there again. And again.

"Oh, God. Dan..." she whispered, remembering that they had to be quiet. She was barely holding on. He began to slowly pull her panties down. With his teeth. When he finally got them down to her knees, he finished the job with his hands, dropping them on the floor next to his pants. Dan rose up then, standing over her. Blair was on fire as he pushed her up further onto the bed and began to slowly crawl up on top of her. He began to gnaw at the shoulder he had exposed earlier, while his fingers delicately skimmed inside the shirt and over her breasts. Her breathing was intensifying as she arched her back before him. He began to pull down his boxers. She was full on panting now, ready for him to take his place inside of her.

He took one last moment to just look at her. How was it possible for someone so angelic looking to turn him on so much? Dan almost felt guilty at what he was about to do to her. Almost...

Her hands came to rest on his arms as he situated himself. They both watched as his hard cock easily found her entrance, plunging into her easily. Without thinking, they both went to cry out, but Dan somehow managed to muffle them as he leaned down to kiss her.

He rocked into her slowly, smoothly, and she opened her eyes with every thrust, regaling at just how perfectly they fit together. Their movements began to vibrate Blair out of the shirt, her breasts exposing themselves to him from behind the plaid. He leaned down and kissed one in response.

Each push was sending Blair further and further toward the precipice. She squeezed a breast as he began to grab her thighs for leverage, pushing them out as wide as he could as he continued to pump inside of her. Her hands left her breast and came up to rest on his chest for a moment before sliding them down his bare stomach and around to his backside. Her legs snaked around his, her knees now gripping him at his waist while her bare feet massaged his calves. She was holding on for dear life now, her nails clawing into his back, pulling him into her as tightly as possible. He began to move his hips in a circular direction, knowing that drove her crazy, and she soon began to tighten around his cock.

"Dan, mmm. Keep going," she panted, as she came for the first time. He grabbed her hips, bringing them up completely off the bed. As much as he wanted to keep the languid pace and prolong their pleasure, Dan's need to cum inside of her got the better of him. He let go of her hips and grabbed her wrists, holding them in place on the pillows above her head. Dan began to speed up, his cock pounding into her mercilessly now.

"Holy..Fuck," Dan said as he started to come as quietly as he possibly could, which wasn't very quiet at all actually.

Blair whimpered as Dan plunged into her one last time, holding himself inside of her as he finished. She was writhing beneath him, still being restrained by Dan's hands on her wrists. He leaned in once more to place a kiss on one of her exposed breasts, eliciting another jolt from her. Dan finally collapsed on top of her, their breathing in perfect sync.

After a minute on top of her, he moved off to the side, picking Blair up for a moment in order to pull the sheets and comforter back and place her underneath them. She gazed up at him, still catching her breath, exhausted but appreciative. Blair watched with hooded eyes as Dan slipped his boxers back on. He then leaned in to give her a tender kiss on the forehead before grabbing the empty juice glass from the nightstand and heading back towards the door.

"I'd say it's time to rehydrate," he smiled, a knowing glint in his eye. "Be right back." Blair nodded but didn't say anything. She was too tired to speak.

When he returned a minute later, she was already asleep. Dan took a seat on the bed next to her and just observed her. Her hair was wild, flowing in different directions all over the pillow. Her skin glowed in the moonlight. If anything, the sex had worked some color back into her cheeks. He set the juice down and began to button her up before sliding in beside her. He wrapped his arm around her before dozing off beside her. One of them would be dreaming a little more peacefully than the other that night.

* * *

"Mister Chuck?" Dorota asked as she answered the door to her Queens apartment. The sun hadn't even risen, and she was confused to see him. He wasn't even supposed to be in the country.

"I thought you and Miss Blair supposed to be in Seychelles?" Chuck took a step inside of Dorota's Queens apartment.

"We decided to wait a day. Blair wanted to bring Henry along with us. Make it a real family getaway. I take it he isn't awake yet?" Dorota shook her head no.

"I am sorry. We have really late night and the boys did not want to sleep so Vanya and I let them stay up until the big ball drop down. It was too much excitement. He probably be really tired for rest of day." Chuck nodded.

"Well if you don't mind, I think I'll just go wake him up. We need to get going." Dorota watched suspiciously as Chuck invited himself in and headed towards the back bedrooms. He found Henry, sound asleep in his pajamas, lying next to Leo." Chuck gently rubbed on his back to prod him awake.

"Come on, Henry. Time to go," he whispered. Chuck looked over and found his son's overnight bag laying nearby. He quickly gathered his things and shoved them inside as Henry started to open his eyes. Chuck quickly hoisted the bag up over his shoulder, then leaned over to pick Henry up. When he got back to the living room, Dorota had now been joined by Vanya.

"Thank you both for keeping Henry. We appreciate it." Dorota nodded, still a bit confused. Before Chuck and Henry could make it out the door, Dorota called out to him.

"Mister Chuck...when you all come back? So I know when to get the groceries and have apartment ready."

Chuck turned to face Dorota. He paused for a moment.

"I'm not really sure. Guess that will be up to Blair." Chuck then nodded, gave his sleeping son a gentle pat on the back, turned and walked out.

* * *

Blair jolted up. It was early morning, and the light had just begun to creep in through the window. For a second she couldn't remember where she even was. Or what had happened the night before. That is until she looked over to see Dan lying next to her, his arm draped loosely around her waist.

She had woken up to a nagging feeling in her gut. It had been there at least all night, but probably even longer than that. Sex with Dan had helped to suppress it for a time, but it was now reemerging. She took a deep breath as a wave of anxiety suddenly kicked in. She started to move Dan's arm from around her waist, trying her best not to wake him. Blair pushed the covers away, and pulled herself off the bed, setting her bare feet on the cold floor.

And that's when it hit her. A strong wave of nausea.

She gagged for a moment, turning to look over at Dan. But he didn't stir. When another wave suddenly hit her, she immediately stood up, steadied herself for a moment, then quickly but quietly made her way out the door and into the only bathroom inside the loft. Blair would never understand how the Humphrey family lived three people to one bathroom. Or why they had to cross the living room to even reach it.

She made it to the bathroom just in time. There wasn't much food in her stomach, but it didn't matter. She was going to eliminate whatever happened to be in there.

Over in his bedroom, Rufus was just beginning to stir. He groggily looked over at his phone and noticed four missed calls. All from Lily. What the hell? What could he have done to piss her off now?

He placed the phone back down. Then thought again. What if something was really wrong? Rufus grabbed his phone not bothering to listen to the messages she had left for him. He hit the "callback" button and she answered after a couple of rings.

"Well. Your son has really done it now," she said without even bothering with a greeting. Rufus rolled his eyes. So this was it? She was calling to bitch him out about Dan asking Serena for a divorce.

"Whatever he's 'done now' has nothing to do with you or I, Lil. Serena and Dan aren't kids anymore. Whatever is happening between them, they need to handle on their own. I do know that Dan wants as amicable a divorce as possible, though."

"Well, I doubt that's going to be even remotely possible now, Rufus." He wasn't sure exactly what to make of that statement. Before he could ask her what she meant he became distracted by the unmistakable sound of someone throwing up in his bathroom.

"Dan?" Rufus questioned. Lily didn't realize he was no longer referring to their conversation. He grabbed his robe from off the end of his bed and threw it on as he started to make his way towards the bathroom to check on his son.

"Yes, Rufus! Dan! What your son has done is truly unforgivable." Rufus didn't bother to respond to her. He made his way to the bathroom, and calmly opened the door. His mouth fell open. He was shocked and amazed to see Blair Waldorf Bass lying on his bathroom floor.

"RUFUS! Are you even listening to me?" Lily screamed.

"I, uh, I think I'm going to need to call you back." Before Lily could respond he hung up.

"Blair?" Blair slowly opened her eyes and attempted to lift her head, barely able to peek up from her place on the cold tile. It felt so good against her hot cheek.

"I'm fine, Mr. Humphrey," she said, slightly out of it. "I just need a minute to-" She closed her eyes again and laid her head back on the floor. Rufus closed the door, taking a moment to gather his thoughts. Suddenly Lily's words made sense.

He walked into the center of the living room. "Dan!" Rufus yelled out angrily. Over in his old bedroom, Dan woke up to what he could have sworn was the sound of his name. He looked around apprehensively, suddenly realizing Blair was no longer lying next to him anymore.

He quickly threw back the covers and made his way out of his bedroom. Dan had is head down as he suddenly ran head on into a physical barrier. He looked up to see that the barrier in question was Rufus. His father was stern faced. His arms were crossed as he looked his son directly in the eyes.

"Dad..." Dan said nervously. "I was just coming to uh-"

"Blair's in the bathroom. She's now passed out on the tile. You know, there's nothing like waking up on New Year's morning to the sounds of someone throwing up in your bathroom." Dan's eyes grew wide as he tried to process what was going on. Rufus now knew about him and Blair, and like everyone else, he was obviously not pleased.

He looked around his father to see that the bathroom door was indeed shut. Rufus watched his son for a moment, noticing the concern on Dan's face. He began to soften a bit.

"Perhaps you should go and check on her," Rufus suggested, nodding in the direction of the bathroom. "Get her back in the bed. Then I think you and I probably need to have a little chat." Dan nodded hesitantly as he walked toward the bathroom.

Yes. They probably did.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Dan carefully opened the bathroom door and poked his head inside. Even with Rufus's warning, he was disturbed to see Blair lying there, curled up in a fetal position on the floor. Her eyes were closed and she was completely drowning in the shirt he had given her to wear. She had pulled the shirt over her knees, her arms holding everything tightly against her stomach. When she heard Dan enter, she managed to pick her head up off of the floor for a second.

"Humphrey..." She could barely get his name out.

"Blair. What's wrong?" Dan asked softly as he knelt down over her. She shook her head. "I'm just so nauseated. I can't move...or else I'll...It feels just like when I..." she lay her head back on the tile and sighed. "When I..." Blair's eyes suddenly popped open.

"Oh my God..." Blair whispered to herself, and shut her eyes again.

"Oh my God," she repeated, a bit more energetically. She was suddenly much more alert than she had been. She grabbed her forehead. "I told my mother that there's no way...but I _am_. Oh my god." She placed a hand over her mouth. Dan truly thought she was hallucinating.

"Blair, you're kind of scaring me." She looked up at Dan in disbelief, trying to remember the last time she had any semblance of a period. It had been a while...but missed periods weren't necessarily a new phenomenon for her.

"Humphrey," she started to babble. "Every night I take it. Every single night. Well except for last night. Which apparently didn't matter anyway... but I digress..." She turned over onto her back. "See with Louis, I clearly remember that I skipped a day. I did. I skipped it. I admit it. One time. That's all it took. That's what happened. But now I never miss. I _never _miss. Except for last night." Dan continued to watch and listen in confusion.

"Blair-" Blair looked up and locked eyes on him.

"Humphrey. Close the door," she commanded in a whisper. Dan froze up for a moment. He would have taken it as her propositioning him if she weren't currently curled up in a ball on the floor.

When he didn't immediately comply, she ordered him again, a little more emphatically. "Close the door, Humphrey!" Dan jumped up and poked his head out for a moment, forcing a smile and giving Rufus a thumbs up signal. His father gave him an awkward look.

"You know, you go from passed out on the floor to 'Miss Bossy Pants' quicker than anybody I know."

"Dan. How long have we been sleeping together?" What an interesting segue, Dan thought.

"I don't know," he answered casually. "A little more than three weeks?"

"Three weeks?" Blair questioned. "That's it?" It was hard to imagine, considering everything that had happened, that they'd only started sleeping together three weeks ago. "Really?" she asked him again. "Just three weeks?"

"Okay, do I need to take you to the hospital? Because you are speaking a form of gibberish that even _I_ don't understand."

"Humphrey," she sighed. "Do I have to spell it out for you?" Dan looked down at Blair, one arm still gripping her stomach. She then gestured in the direction of the toilet. Dan looked at the toilet. Then back to Blair. Then back to the toilet. His mouth dropped. Okay. Maybe he had been a bit slow on the uptake.

"Um, WHAT?"

"What?" she mocked.

"Yeah, what?" Dan repeated.

"You want to try and maybe throw some other vocabulary words into the conversation? Or will that do it for ya?"

Dan wasn't normally this slow. Especially when the clues were basically screaming at him. But this was completely out of left field...she was on birth control after all. "I don't understand. You were on the pill, right?"

"Um, I'm pretty sure I just explained that to you," Blair said, exasperated. To be fair, she wasn't explaining so much as having an awkward conversation with herself that Dan just happened to be listening in on. Dan was still trying to understand.

"You haven't... but you...you aren't totally sure right? I mean you haven't taken a pregnancy test yet." Dan suddenly realized his palms were starting to sweat and he was gripping the hell out of the vanity.

"Is that a question or a statement?" Blair asked sharply.

"I'm just saying. How can you...how can you be completely sure if-" Dan took a nervous breath. "I mean, maybe it's a bug. Or...what have you eaten in the last forty-eight hours?"

"This is not my first rodeo, Dan! I may not procreate as often as that Duggar woman, but I do know what morning sickness feels like. For instance, the smell of that coffee Rufus just started brewing...is just...it's just...Oh my GOD! Please tell him to STOP the BREW!" Dan watched in horror as Blair shut her eyes and began to gag. She forced herself onto her knees, steadying herself and gripping the toilet seat. Dan looked on in horror as she dry heaved, gagged, and spit up into the bowl.

Blair hadn't had much in her stomach to begin with, and after the earlier spell, the well was officially dry. She repeated the cycle of heave, gag, spit. She rested in that same spot for a couple of minutes.

Dan was amazed. Blair had actually let her head touch the toilet seat. Dan knew it had to be bad. Dan said nothing, just leaned in to gently rub her back.

After a couple of minutes, he watched as she lay herself back down on the bathroom mat, allowing her face to touch the cold tile.

"Well. That was all kinds of gross," Dan commented as Blair cut her eyes at him.

"So," she exhaled. "Where were we? Oh yes. Morning sickness. What does it feel like you ask?"

"It feels like THIS!" She rolled over onto her back.

During Blair's first pregnancy she hadn't recognized the symptoms of morning sickness. Either that, or had been in denial. Most a little of both. But with Henry it was unmistakable. She knew she was pregnant the week of conception. Later in the pregnancy, she had to be hospitalized for severe dehydration and was diagnosed with hyperemesis gravidarum.

Her system was apparently ultra sensitive.

Dan let himself fall back against the wall, sliding down and sitting perpendicular to Blair's head. Even with her insistence that this was a pregnancy, he had trouble completely believing it-though the crabbiness and vomiting did seem to jibe with what he already knew about pregnant women.

There was no doubt that, if she was indeed pregnant, he was the child's father. Blair and Chuck hadn't been together since last summer-something he knew from his conversations with Blair before their affair even started.

Dan took a deep breath. He had never been in on this stage of a potential pregnancy. Back in high school, there had been a rumor that Dan was going to be Serena's baby daddy. She had been spotted buying a pregnancy test at a convenience store near school. Yeah. That was probably a good idea.

There were pics of Serena holding up a variety of pregnancy tests, basically flashing them around like they were flares, like she was an airport worker signaling a jumbo jet into its gate. And if that wasn't conspicuous enough, she was also overheard asking the store clerk for her opinion on which test she recommended. The clerk looked at her like she was crazy, then randomly pointed to one.

But ultimately, that rumor was dispelled with the reveal that the pregnancy test was, ironically, for Blair.

Then there was Georgina and the whole Milo debacle. He had grown attached to Milo after Georgina showed up on his doorstep. Dan should have known that something was off immediately, but one look at that precious face...how could he deny such a sweet little guy?

He hadn't even known Georgina was pregnant and the fact that he took them both in, no questions asked, was probably something he would have done even if he had known the child wasn't his from the beginning. And looking back, if he _had_ been Milo's father she would have been shouting it over both the Brooklyn and Manhattan skylines from the moment of conception, so maybe deep down he even actually knew that the child wasn't his. But regardless, he grew very attached to Milo.

"Um. So...what do we do now-" Dan asked anxiously.

"Well. If I ever get off this floor I'm gonna go buy a pregnancy test."

"But don't you already-"

"You still have to do the test, Dan. It may not even come up positive yet, though."

"So if it comes up positive, then you make a doctor's appointment...and what? Take a test to confirm the test?" Dan wanted to know exactly what they were in store for and right now Blair was just confusing him.

A thousand thoughts were swimming in his head. He suddenly had a vision of himself frantically hailing a taxi, guiding a very pregnant Blair into the backseat. And another vision of himself pushing Blair in a wheelchair out the front door of Lenox Hill, a tightly wrapped bundle in her arms. And then still another vision of the two of them standing together over a child's birthday cake, Blair smiling up at him as he held their toddler in his arms as they both sang happy birthday.

Dan shook it off. He was obviously getting way ahead of himself. At this point he didn't even know if this pregnancy was even something she'd want to follow through with-provided she was actually pregnant. It was no secret she struggled with Henry. What if she didn't even want anymore kids?

"Well. They don't really see you until you're so far along. But I'm going to need some Zofran. I'm gonna need some relief. This is just..." She was starting to sound a bit listless again as another round of nausea hit.

And that's when it struck him. Blair was already preparing herself to have his child. Those last statements had proven it. She wasn't thinking about other alternatives to this pregnancy. She was speaking in the future tense. She was "_going to need some_ _relief_" from the nausea and vomiting. Nausea and vomiting she would continue to have... if she remained pregnant.

And even if her present condition was some sort of misinterpretation on Blair's part, the idea of her having his child wasn't repulsive to her.

She slowly opened her eyes to see Dan smiling down at her.

"What are you doing?" she hazily, but still slightly annoyed."

"I'm smiling." He leaned down to kiss Blair on the forehead. "At you," he said and kissed her again. "Because..." and again, "I think you're incredible." He gently caressed her hair.

She didn't say anything, but Dan could swear he saw her lips just barely curling, holding back a smile.

"You know, Blair. I think you'd be more comfortable back in the bed."

"No. This is good," she replied. "I can't leave this," she said as she patted the base of the toilet. "My friend."

"And what's going to happen when other people need to use 'your friend?'" Dan teased. She grinned for a moment, her eyes still shut. "That's not my problem."

Dan pushed himself up onto his knees. Before she knew what was happening, he slid his arms underneath her legs and lifted her up.

"Dan. No-" she whined as he opened the door and carried her back to his bedroom. Rufus looked up mid sip from his cup of coffee, watching curiously as Blair firmly held onto Dan's neck. In the bedroom, Dan tucked Blair back in the bed, fluffing the pillows and trying to make her as comfortable as possible. He pulled the comforter up over her arms, making sure she was tucked in snugly.

As he grabbed a sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants to put on, he informed her of his plan. "Listen, there are crackers already on the nightstand. I shall return soon with a slew of other creature comforts. In the meantime, Cedric is right there to keep an eye on you until I get back. Which will be very soon," he added. Blair watched in wonder as Dan scurried out of the room.

Lying in bed, she looked around, trying to find something to focus on that would distract her from another potential spell of nausea. She suddenly caught sight of her panties laying on the floor next to Dan's pants. The image made her cringe. "Nooooo..."

For a very brief moment she wondered if Rufus had _seen_ anything earlier. Dan's shirt did cover her up pretty well, but who knows how she had her legs positioned when he walked in on her this morning? The thought of Rufus Humphrey seeing her in such a state was bad enough. The thought that he might have seen her nether regions was completely mortifying. She shut her eyes and sighed, trying to think about something else and quickly.

And within a few seconds, she had done it. It suddenly occurred to her why she was even in the bathroom in the first place. She had Dan's child inside of her. "Crazy."

Dan quickly ran into the kitchen, grabbing a few garbage bags from underneath the sink. He looked through the cupboard and found a water bottle and filled it up with ice and water. Rufus set his newspaper down to observe, but said nothing. He then watched as Dan ran over to the living room to grab his laptop and a few DVD's. He also grabbed an extra blanket from off the couch before hustling back into his room.

Blair raised her eyebrows in surprise when she saw everything he had managed to pile into his arms. He sat on the bed and lay the garbage bags near her, partially opening them so they were ready to go. Just in case. He spread the extra blanket out on top of her, adjusting it for even and maximum coverage. He then placed the laptop and DVD's on the opposite nightstand, took the water bottle and placed near the tip at Blair's mouth. "Open," he commanded as he squeezed it and encouraged her to drink. She nearly choked up water everywhere.

"Dan!" she admonished, pushing the bottle away.

"I just don't want you to get dehydrated. So are you up to eating? Or are you still too queasy? You really do need to try and eat something. But just... you just give me your thoughts." He set the water bottle down next to her on the night stand.

"I think I will just lie here," she said as another wave began to hit. "And not move. Ever again. Okay?" Dan watched her, fascinated with every slight movement of her body and every crinkle her face made. He wanted to remember everything about this day. And Blair. It was simply unbelievable. She closed her eyes again.

"Dan," Blair said flatly without even opening her eyes.

"Yeah? You need something? Tell me, I'm on it."

"I need you to stop staring at me." Dan smiled.

That was the one request he was going to have trouble complying with.

He watched for another second. Maybe he was "smothering" a bit. He eventually forced himself to give her some space. Dan got up from the bed and walked out of the room, quietly closing the door. He had a goofy grin on his face.

He was going to be a father. A dad. A padre. He and Blair had made a baby. Against all odds. Did he have super sperm? Apparently. Dan laughed at the thought. This was just too fantastic for words. With his head in the clouds, he walked into the kitchen, grabbed a mug and poured himself some coffee. Rufus watched until he could no longer stay silent.

"How is she?"

"Oh, she's just...she's great. Wonderful. Amazing. Not feeling so hot, though." Rufus gave Dan a look. Those words didn't go together.

His son was head over heels.

"Alright, Dan. Spill." Dan looked up at his father. Where to start?

"Well...I am with Blair now. We are officially together," he explained calmly, before taking a sip of coffee.

"Yes. Dan. I can see that," Rufus responded matter of factly. "Care to elaborate on how this happened?" Dan shrugged.

"We just..." Dan took a deep breath as he recalled that fateful night. The party. They stood out on the balcony and just talked for hours. Like no time had even passed.

"...reconnected one night."

Rufus furrowed his brow. "So this is why Lily was calling me this morning?" Dan looked up. "Lily called you?" he asked, not really that surprised.

"Told me you'd done something. I knew whatever it was probably had something to do with her finding out you'd been seeing someone. I had no idea the person you were telling me about was Blair. Dan, do you realize how messy this is? I assume that since Lily knows, everyone knows. Serena... Chuck. I assume that's why you brought her here last night? To escape the judgmental eyes of Manhattan."

"The cat was kind of let out of the bag last night at Eleanor's party. In a big way," Dan wasn't going to elaborate _how_ exactly it had been revealed.

"How did Serena take it? Did you tell her you knew about her fling with Nate? And what about Chuck? He couldn't have been pleased."

"We, um...we actually didn't have time to _discuss _it with anyone. Serena...I don't really know what she thinks. Don't really care. And as far as Chuck goes, well he really doesn't have a leg to stand on either, Dad. He's been a horrible husband to Blair. I mean, he's slept with every single nanny their child has had."

This information didn't surprise Rufus. He had never been a fan of Chuck's, considering the bastard had taken advantage of his daughter when she was a freshman in high school, _and_ had later on taken her virginity. He had tolerated him when he was married to Lily, but when the marriage ended, so did that tolerance.

Dan being at odds with Chuck again made Rufus a bit apprehensive. Chuck could be a vindictive son of a bitch. Many years earlier he'd tried to sabotage a book proposal Dan had been working on, all in retaliation for him dating Blair. He had always been very possessive of her. Who knew what he'd do in reaction to this?

Rufus sighed. "Well, I hope you have a plan because you both can't hide here forever. Knowing Chuck, he's going to do everything in his power to make life difficult for her, and you. Throw a child into the mix, things could get pretty ugly." Or two children, Dan thought.

Dan understood what his father was trying to tell him. But nothing was going to push him off of the cloud he was currently floating on. He knew he was probably fooling himself, but he still had hope that things with their spouses could be resolved peacefully.

"And don't worry. We know we can't hide out here. This was actually the last place Blair even wanted to come last night. No offense or anything."

"None taken. I guess."

Dan took another sip of coffee. "Anyway, I'm sure when Blair starts feeling better-" Dan caught himself. How long did morning sickness actually last anyway?

"So what's wrong with her, exactly?" Rufus asked.

"It's uh...it's food poisoning," Dan said, almost too quickly. "Bad sushi, she thinks," Dan fibbed. Rufus gave him a curious look. Luckily for Dan, at that moment, they were interrupted by the crystal clear sounds of another barf session in progress.

Rufus crinkled his nose. "Food poisoning." Rufus repeated as he looked at Dan. It made him a bit nervous. Did his father sense the lie?

"Okay." Rufus finally nodded.

"Well, I think I'll go to the market. Get Blair some Gatorade," Rufus said. He started to make his way to his bedroom to get dressed, but paused first. "And tell her to keep drinking that water."

Dan smiled. "I'll do it. Thanks, Dad."

* * *

Eleanor wasn't sure what to do with herself anymore. She had paced back and forth in her study so many times she had practically worn a path in the carpet. Chuck and Henry were due over at any moment to have breakfast, and she and Chuck were to discuss "the situation," a bit further. She and her grandson were _supposed_ to be on their way to Paris later, but that plan was scratched due to his mother currently being "off the grid." The fact that she hadn't even tried to get in touch with either of them was troublesome.

Eleanor and Chuck had parted ways the previous night with the understanding that Blair needed help. Making scenes at parties with Dan Humphrey, getting drunk at the Plaza at Christmas brunch-this was not her daughter. Blair had left without her purse or phone, and with no regard whatsoever for her family. It was completely unacceptable.

There were a couple of different stress rehab clinics that Lily had recommended, and this morning, she and Chuck were going to pick one together.

Eleanor was rather proud of Chuck, and the way he was handling the situation. Blair had dealt him an embarrassing blow last night, but he was facing it with aplomb. When Harold had left her, she remembered she'd had some very choice words for him. But during their talk last night, Chuck had expressed nothing but concern for Blair. He agreed that this wasn't the Blair he knew. After last night, he told her that regardless of the status of their relationship, he only wanted what was best for her. He wanted to help in any way he could.

Eleanor had an inkling where Blair was, but she wasn't quite up to venturing to Brooklyn during the _best_ of circumstances. She looked at her watch. Chuck and Henry must have been running late. Henry was a handful, after all. He was probably giving his father a bit of trouble.

Eleanor thought about her grandson. This situation had the potential to be difficult on him.

He was quite a precocious child. She hadn't spent as much time with him as she would have liked to in the past, but she was hoping to change that. And from the looks of things, she wouldn't have a choice. He was very different from how Blair had been at that age. At Henry's age she had been a very meticulous child. Very intelligent. A perfectionist. Spoiled, of course (like Henry), but with impeccable manners. Henry was a bit...rowdier.

Eleanor continued to reflect while she waited for her son-in-law and grandson to arrive. The thought occurred to her that maybe she was somehow responsible for Blair's "acting out."

The truth was Eleanor hadn't been around much when Blair was growing up. She was too busy working. Building a company. A legacy which she hoped to hand over to her daughter one day. At least that's what she always told herself. That this was all for Blair. It was that excuse which helped to ease the guilt she felt of being a not so hands on mother. But it never completely eradicated it.

And that's why she wanted Blair to succeed where she had not. To prove that powerful women _could_ balance family and career. She had faith in her daughter. She needed Blair to do better than she had, but maybe she had pushed her too hard. And this was the result. Blair was spiraling out of control in some sort of early life crisis. With Dan Humphrey.

Eleanor hadn't witnessed Blair and Dan's entire kiss, but she had seen more than she needed to. She might as well have been having sex with him right there in the middle of the living room. Eleanor closed her eyes, trying to clear out the image of them groping each other right there in her living room.

Dan Humphrey was the person she had turned to. It was surprising...yet not.

She scratched her head. "Daniel Humphrey." To Eleanor, Dan was a bit of a conundrum. She would always remember him as the cater waiter who couldn't seem to handle his job at Cyrus's Passover seder. He basically quit mid-service and made himself a guest.

But later on, he had become a great support for Blair. He had been there for her throughout the aftermath of her marriage to Louis, even trying to help her flee town. Why Blair had chosen to confide in Dan, and not in her, she was still unsure. And there may have been a bit of suppressed jealousy on Eleanor's part during that period. But she had still been somewhat grateful that Blair wasn't dealing with everything alone. But when Dan and Blair started dating before the divorce to Louis was even final, she wasn't sure what to think.

Dan had been nice enough, she supposed-like his father, who she rarely had any contact with, now that he and Lily were divorced.

But Charles Bass was a billionaire. Nate Archibald had the perfect pedigree. These were the boys Blair had known since they were all babies. And Dan? Well he was like the wild horse, a late entry into the race for Blair's heart. And now she had taken up with him once again. Eleanor truly didn't know what to think.

Eleanor looked at her watch again. Chuck and Henry were really late now.

She was already on edge and now starting to worry. Chuck was usually very punctual. She pulled out her phone and dialed his number, but it went straight to voicemail without even ringing. She hung up before leaving a message.

"Odd," she thought. Maybe there was something going on with the service in the city.

She next tried Dorota who picked up on the first ring.

"Miss Eleanor, Happy New Year!"

"Dorota?" After her failed attempt to contact Chuck, she was in fact surprised that Dorota had answered so quickly. "Oh, Dorota. Um, has Charles been by to pick up Henry yet? I am expecting them for breakfast, but they're late, and I'm just wondering when I should expect them."

After a long uncomfortable pause, Dorota finally answered.

"For breakfast?" There was unmistakable confusion in Dorota's voice that immediately didn't sit well with Eleanor. "Mister Chuck come here to Queens very early this morning to pick up Mister Henry. Maybe five o'clock. He say Miss Blair want trip to Seychelles to be family trip. For Henry, too. They did not tell you?"

Eleanor swallowed hard. She had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. There were two possible scenarios here. Maybe three.

"Um, Dorota," Eleanor replied nervously. "I am going to have to call you back."

"But Miss Eleanor-" Dorota started to say, obviously sensing a problem. Eleanor hung up on her mid-sentence and quickly called Lily, who again answered on the first ring.

"Darling, how are you? I spoke to Rufus this morning and told him that Dan really crossed the line with that stunt he pulled last night-"

"Lily," Eleanor suddenly interrupted. "Have you heard from Charles today?"

"Well, no. Not yet. I'm trying to give him a little space. I'm sure he has a lot on his mind. But I was planning on stopping by later to...why? Has something else happened?" Eleanor took a labored breath. "I just tried to call him but it went straight to his voicemail. He and Henry were supposed to be here for breakfast an hour ago."

"Henry is probably holding them up. And the service in the city just keeps getting worse and worse. Let me try to-"

"When I couldn't reach him..." Eleanor continued, completely ignoring Lily's attempts at placation, "I called Dorota. He already picked Henry up. At five in the morning."

"Oh my God! Well do you think they were in some type of an accident? I'm about to turn on the news-"

"I don't think they were in an accident." Eleanor could feel her teeth grinding together. "I think Chuck took Henry and fled town as payback!"

"Eleanor," Lily replied, trying to keep her calm. "I honestly doubt they left town. Maybe Charles had an errand to run that's somehow holding them up? Perhaps he had to stop by the office. Or had to make a trip back to the apartment for Henry. If you had plans then there's a reasonable explanation, I'm sure."

"Well, I might believe that. Except for he hasn't called! But the most troublesome thing-he told Dorota this morning that he and Blair were still going to the Seychelles. And that now Blair wanted to bring Henry along!"

"That's what he told her?" Lily was legitimately unsure what to think. She was hoping for the best, but now fearing the worst. Chuck did have a tendency to run away from things when they didn't go his way. This honestly sounded exactly like him. The only difference was he was bringing Henry along with him.

"And I guess there's no chance that Blair-" Eleanor rolled her eyes.

"After what we witnessed last night!? And Charles and I had an extremely lengthy conversation about Blair last night. If she had somehow come back to him, then I would hope that he would have informed me!" Lily sighed with sympathy.

"Eleanor, let me just go run by Bass, make sure he and Henry aren't there. I'm sure there's a perfectly logical explanation for all of this. And maybe you should run by the apartment. See if they're there." Lily knew they probably weren't going to find them at either location.

She couldn't necessarily blame him for wanting to skip town after the events of last night. But this was going to make her stepson look like the bad guy.

"Fine," Eleanor agreed. "I will call you when I get to the apartment. And please, if you hear anything-"

"I will call you," Lily assured her. "Just don't worry. I'm sure it's all just a misunderstanding."

Eleanor hung up. "Misunderstanding?" she repeated to herself. Not likely.

She grabbed her coat. As she stepped on the elevator, all she could think about was how her son-in-law had just played her for a fool.

* * *

"Blair, you have to keep trying to drink." Blair turned up her nose. The good news was she was able to sit up now. The bad news was everything she ingested was still coming right back up. She had tried five different fabulous flavors of Gatorade. Each time she attempted to drink one, it ended right inside the trash bag. Dan couldn't believe his eyes. It was like she was puking a rainbow. The blue flavor had been especially unkind. Unlike the others, she was able to get the whole bottle of it down-before it turned on her. At any rate, the nausea was starting to subside for now. And as long as she wasn't drinking anything-or eating-she was fine.

"Just try to visualize, he said encouragingly. "With every drop you manage to ingest, those electrolytes are seeping into your system-"

"You're weird," Blair smiled. "I promise I will try again. Later. But right now-" she sighed as she started to pull the covers off of her and get out of the bed. She stood up, bracing herself on the bed. She was still a bit light headed.

"What are you doing, Blair?"

She sighed. "I'm getting up, Dan. No sense in putting it off any longer. I need to go see my mother. And my son. And Chuck. Have the difficult conversations. What time is it anyway?"

Dan glanced at his phone. "Ten. Are you sure you should be...shouldn't you really stay in bed? I mean, what if you get sick on the way over there. Or if...I mean shouldn't you really be avoiding stressful situations right now? Maybe you can just call? You can use my phone. Or, hey! I know. Write a letter? A nice note. Just explain to them that-"

Blair knew that if he could hear how he sounded...

But he couldn't. Because he already had Daddy fever. It was kind of funny to see Dan's sudden transformation. But she was a bit concerned. There were things he needed to understand. Things she probably should have informed him of earlier. Things that _could _happen and cause disappointment if he wasn't prepared. Unfortunately her head had been in a toilet.

"Dan, you know. We _might_ be in week two of this thing. But probably more like week one." She paused to see if Dan understood what she was saying. She didn't want to put a damper on things, but she had to be pragmatic about the situation. "You know things, there's a lot of things that can happen in a pregnancy. Especially early on. You know that right?"

Dan forced a smile. He knew that. Of course he knew that. But it didn't matter. He was already deeply affected by this child. If anything were to happen he knew he would be devastated.

"I just don't want you to be disappointed. You know if-"

He tried to suppress the thought. "I'm honestly just concerned about _you_."

Blair smiled and nodded. "I do have a delicate system. But, you really shouldn't worry. I've been through it before. And I'm still here."

"Well, if you insist on going back to your apartment, then I insist on accompanying you." Blair raised an eyebrow. "Well, it's not like you were going to have a choice in the matter."

She watched Dan for a moment. "You really are excited aren't you? About all this?" She laughed and nodded at the bottles and trash bags strewn about the bed.

Dan smiled. "Maybe I am a little..." He stood up. "I guess I didn't even realize how much I..." He shook his head. "Honestly, I wasn't even thinking about something like this. And now... I just want it to happen so badly!" he confessed enthusiastically.

Blair laughed. Dan was already cracking her up. "Well. I'm not psychic," she said pointedly. "But I think at some point...you're gonna get your wish. Even if it doesn't happen this time. Because Dan Humphrey should get what he wants." Dan smiled as he thought about her comment. He watched her as she leaned over gingerly to put her dress back on and removed his shirt that she had been wearing. She then motioned for him to zip her up.

"So when...or where do you think it..you know, It happened?" He just couldn't help himself. Blair lovingly rolled her eyes. It was going to be a long nine months.

"Well. You have two choices, probably. The inn. Or the atelier. So..."

"But there were...many sub-choices at the inn. Atelier was one and done," he leaned in to kiss her one the neck while he zipped her.

"I say...the Waldorf Designs atelier," Dan continued. "You know you destroyed my shirt that day? Nate pointed it out to me at Chelsea Market. I had to make up this whole story about saving this pedestrian from getting hit by a car!" Blair laughed as she turned to face him and placed her arms around his neck. "I guess old habits die hard, Humphrey. Even in fake stories." Dan slid his arms around her waist. They just looked at each other, taking the moment in.

"I say atelier, too." Blair stood up on her tiptoes to kiss him.

She then smiled devilishly.

"At least that's what we're going to tell my mother."

* * *

"I don't want to go anywhere!" Henry screamed at the top of his lungs. The Bass jet had been in the air for an hour and Henry had been screaming at the top of his lungs the whole time. Wendy, the flight attendant's eyes were bulging out of her head. And it was already going to be a long flight.

"If you don't calm yourself, right now-" Chuck seethed. Henry sat up in his chair and began feeling around in his father's pockets.

"Henry, what are you doing!?" Chuck was quickly losing patience as he threw the documents he was looking at onto the tray table.

"I want to call my mom!" Henry finally found Chuck's phone and began to press on it to get it to turn on. Chuck grabbed it from his hands.

"Your mother isn't where she can be reached right now," Chuck explained as Henry crossed his arms and began to repeatedly kick at the chair in front of him.

"That's because you probably made her mad again!" Henry shot back. He gave the chair an extra hard kick this time. Chuck cut his eyes at his son. There would be enough of that. Chuck hadn't planned on telling his son anything about what Blair had done. At least not immediately. But he'd be damned if he was going to put up with this behavior all the way to Bangkok.

"Henry," he began calmly, "Your mother...she left us last night. She made it clear that she doesn't care about either of us. She's gone."

Henry stopped kicking the chair, but didn't immediately say anything. Well. That was not easy, Chuck thought to himself. But it seemed to have done the trick. He picked up the work documents again and started to peruse them.

After a couple of minutes, Henry looked up at Chuck. He could feel his child gazing at him and turned to face him. Chuck noticed tears were streaming down his son's face. Chuck turned away. It was painful to see.

"So my mom doesn't love us anymore?" he asked innocently. Henry had Blair's eyes. They were big and brown and innocent, and like Blair, at this moment they were completely breaking his heart.

Chuck tried to explain to his son what had happened, but he was now struggling for words. "She-" Chuck gulped. "She um-"

Chuck was angry with _Blair_. He wanted to hurt _Blair_. He wanted _Blair _to suffer. She had made a complete fool of him. But he didn't want his son to hurt, though what he had told Henry about his mother wasn't a complete lie. She _had_ run away with Dan _Humphrey_. What part of that act showed that she cared? Besides, she could have gotten to Henry before he did. But she didn't. And now here they were. This was _her_ fault.

Chuck glanced at Henry as he continued cry softly. Wendy stood up from her seat and looked at Chuck to see if there was anything she could do. He saw her and waved her back down.

"What I said earlier...your mother loves you, Henry. She's just-" His voice started to break. At that moment he knew they needed to turn around.

Henry had two parents. Two parents that, despite their own questionable behavior, and a number of parenting ups and downs, were both crazy about their child.

Chuck's own parents had done a number on him. He still didn't have the full story on his mother. There's no way he could put his son through that. No matter what his feeling for Blair were currently.

Chuck picked up the phone that dialed into the cockpit. "There's been a change of plans. I need to return to New York."

Chuck looked down at his son. "Let's go find your mom."

* * *

Blair was a bit surprised to find her apartment door unlocked. She took a cautious step inside, gripping tightly to Dan's hand, and he followed in behind her. Blair looked around. The lights were off and it was eerily quiet.

"Hello?" she called out. There was no response.

"They're probably over at the penthouse." Dan suggested.

"Why don't you go upstairs? Take a shower." Dan said pointedly, alluding to the fact that Blair was still wearing the same dress from the night before. "We'll go over there after."

"Yeah," Blair agreed. "Okay." She turned to slowly walk up the stairs, still looking around as she went.

Dan surveyed the apartment. It was pristine. The pillows were perfectly placed on the couch. The paintings were perfectly straight. He began to really explore. As he moved down the hallway, he heard what sounded like someone talking. Dan hesitated for a moment, then continued to move toward the sound. He made a right down the hall and came to a closed door. He took a deep breath, then opened it.

"What do you mean? You can't even tell me where it was going?" Eleanor Waldorf-Rose leaned over in a chair, one hand supporting her forehead, the other one holding the phone.

"Well someone must know something!" she screamed so loudly, it knocked Dan back against the wall. Eleanor immediately looked up at the sound. "You just call me at this number if you hear anything," she said curtly, but a bit more calmly. From the sound of things, Eleanor was on the warpath. Dan should have wanted to run.

After a moment of extremely uncomfortable silence. Eleanor finally spoke. "Well. Hello." She seemed exhausted and agitated. She didn't make eye contact with him, but she wasn't as livid as he and Blair expected they would find her. She seemed more...stoic.

"Mrs. Waldorf I'm-I mean Mrs. Rose...I'm so sorry. I'm sure you've been worried." Eleanor scoffed, but didn't say anything.

"We didn't plan to-I mean I think after...we just panicked." She stood up and walked toward him. "And I guess you didn't have _your_ phone either?" Dan had no response. She was right. But they had been a bit...distracted.

"Where's Blair?"she asked coldly, finally propelling the conversation ahead.

"She's uh...in the shower." A stone faced Eleanor nodded, then started in the direction of the door. Dan shut his eyes as she made her way past. Before he could censor himself he said it out loud.

"You know, I'm in love with her." Eleanor froze up for a moment.

"I've never loved anyone as much as I love your daughter." Dan exhaled. There. He said it. Done. Eleanor turned around.

"Well, Daniel. That's fabulous." The sarcasm wasn't lost on Dan. "She's going to need someone. Because her husband and son seem to have disappeared off the face of the earth." She waited a moment to let it sink in. Dan looked back in confusion. "Bass jet took off this morning," she continued. "Calls to Chuck's phone go straight to voicemail. No flight plan was filed." She reached for the doorknob, but first turned around.

"But, Daniel. As long as you're in love her I guess the rest of it doesn't really matter now does it?" Dan stood there, unsure of what to say. She nodded as she saw herself out.

Dan was stunned. He hadn't wasted anytime with his retaliation. He had kidnapped Blair's child. Rufus saw it coming. His first thought was to go to the airport and start bashing some heads in to get some people talking. Someone had to know something. He was going to hunt Chuck down. Even if he had to go to every country on the map.

A determined Dan quickly turned toward the door and made his way to the living room. Eleanor was sitting on the couch, staring off into space.

He approached her, then took a cautious seat beside her. "When was the last time anyone saw them?" Dan asked. Eleanor shrugged, then shook her head. "Apparently Chuck went to pick Henry up at Dorota's at five in the morning. He lied and told her Blair wanted to take Henry with them to the Seychelles."

"He did what...?" Dan and Eleanor both looked up to see Blair standing on the stairs. She had on a white bathrobe and her hair was wet and combed out.

"Mother, he did what?" Blair asked again frantically as she made her way down the remainder of the stairs. It pained Eleanor to have to say it again.

Dan calmly started to intercede, not wanting to completely alarm her, especially in her condition.

"It looks like Chuck might have taken Henry out of town this morning."

"There's no 'look' about it," Eleanor chimed in. "That's exactly what he did. Without notifying me. Without notifying Lily. And of course, he couldn't notify you even if he wanted to. And now they're gone!" Eleanor yelled as she rummaged in her purse. She pulled out Blair's two phones and threw them onto the table.

Blair closed her eyes. Her lip began to quiver and soon her whole body was following suit. Eleanor looked up at her and immediately felt guilty. "Blair I'm-"

Blair's eyes found Dan's. The tears forming in her eyes were unmistakable. She seemed unsteady so Dan stood up and went to her, wrapping himself around her tightly. She couldn't even lift her arms to reciprocate. She sobbed quietly for a moment. Eleanor looked on from her seat on the couch but didn't say anything.

Dan didn't want to let go, but he knew they needed to start discussing a game plan. Just as he was about to pull away, the sound of the door opening shocked all three of them. They turned in unison to see Chuck and Henry come through the door. Henry's eyes opened wide at the sight of Blair. He was still clad in his pajamas. Blair looked on in disbelief as her son came running up to her. She knelt down to give him the biggest hug imaginable.

"I thought you left me and weren't coming back!" Henry bawled.

"No, baby." Blair was sobbing harder now. "Why would you think that?"

Dan turned to glare at Chuck who in return was scowling back at him. Dan wanted to grab Chuck by the collar and beat the ever living shit out of him. But it probably wasn't the thing to do with Henry and Eleanor in the room. Later, he thought. Eleanor was now leaning forward on the couch cradling her head in her hands.

Blair pulled back for a moment to get a good look at her son. She noticed he hadn't even been wearing a coat. His cheeks were rosy red and she took them in her hands.

"I would never leave you, do you understand? I would never-" Blair paused for a moment, taking in a shallow breath. She smiled at him. "I-"

"Mommy? What's wrong?" Henry asked, obviously distressed. Chuck and Dan both looked down to see Blair's eyes roll back in her head.

"Blair?!" Dan called out in horror as he scrambled to get to her. Chucked looked on in confusion as a startled Eleanor stood up from the couch.

Before Dan could reach her, Blair collapsed onto the floor.

**AN: So this chapter could have gone in a number of different ways. I ultimately decided I didn't want Chuck to be a complete dick. Don't get me wrong, he's still a dick. But maybe not as much of one? I don't know. I'll let you make your own judgements.**

**A lot of you already guessed/knew that Blair is preggers! Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? I'd love to hear what you think.**

**So, as always, thank you to everyone for reading. And another thank you to those who take the time to review. I appreciate it immensely. I've had some very insightful conversations with a couple of you. So thanks!**

**XOXO**


	13. Chapter 13

**Aaaaahhhhhhh! This was a beast of a chapter to write. Hope you enjoy!**

CHAPTER 13

Dan nervously paced outside of Blair's room, periodically trying to glimpse through the blinds. They were shut tightly. He had only been there for ten minutes. It might as well have been ten hours. Each nerve in his body was standing at attention. Every so often he glanced at the elevator, looking out for Henry and Chuck.

Strange but true, somehow Dan seemed to have been assigned the responsibility of keeping track of Henry and Chuck. At least that's what it seemed like to him. It was part of an unstated agreement he had with Eleanor-clear evidence of how increasingly perverse and twisted this whole situation had become.

As if Dan didn't have enough to worry about.

He wasn't really sure what he needed to do with himself at this point. Not knowing what was going on with Blair or their child was killing him. He was furious with Chuck, and cursing him for the stunt he had pulled, but he was also furious with himself and currently embroiled in an endless cycle of second guessing himself. If only he had insisted Blair go straight to the hospital after leaving the loft. If only he had caught Blair before she hit the hardwood floor. If only he had been paying better attention and not focused on placing Chuck's neck in a chokehold.

Dan recalled that crucial moment before Blair's collapse. The moment he realized something was wrong, when Henry cried out in confusion. It was lightning fast. He remembered the sound of Henry wailing as Dan lifted his mother's lifeless body over to the couch. He remembered the sound of Eleanor gasping, calling out her daughter's name, and the image of her helping him prop Blair up against a pillow.

And then there was Chuck and the seemingly vacant look on his face. Whether it was from guilt or apathy wasn't entirely clear. He didn't move. Frozen in one spot. After a minute, he finally showed a hint of emotion, lifting his weeping son up and cradling his head.

Dan was more than aware that the stress Chuck's stunt put on Blair wasn't the sole cause of her fainting spell. But if anything were to happen to his and Blair's child, Dan would no longer be responsible for his actions where Chuck was concerned.

And the longer he waited for an update, the more his fear grew that something other than dehydration was going on.

Stop it, Dan.

Dan thought back to his last moments with Eleanor and Chuck, just as the paramedics were taking Blair from the apartment. Eleanor had given "orders" to her son in law to get Henry changed and bring him up to the hospital.

Would Eleanor normally give her son in law orders? No. Would Chuck normally take orders from his mother in law? Definitely not. Neither had ever even been in that sort of position. But Eleanor wasn't about to risk Chuck taking off again with her grandson. And maybe telling him what to do and how to do it wasn't going to keep Chuck from fleeing with Henry again. But it sent a message.

After giving instructions to Chuck, Eleanor turned to Dan. She looked at him, a silent plea on her face. At least that's how Dan had perceived it. Now he could have been misinterpreting the entire situation, but he was almost positive that Eleanor was "asking" him to assist her in making sure that Chuck and Henry made it to the hospital.

Dan knew there was no way Chuck would allow him to stick around after Eleanor left, nor did Dan really want to. He wanted to get to Blair. But he did care about the well being of Blair's son. He also wanted to placate Eleanor and Dan wanted her to trust him when it came to looking out for Blair's interests.

So he assured her with a warm smile and a comforting nod.

As soon as the door shut, Chuck slowly turned to Dan, still holding his son tightly up against him. Dan could feel Chuck's eyes searing through him and he turned to face him back. They stood there for a moment, engaged in a tense stare off before Chuck finally uttered, "Get out of my house."

It was simple and to the point, and actually more polite than Dan had anticipated.

So as much as Dan wanted to assist Eleanor, there was no way Chuck was going to allow Dan to "babysit" him. Chuck was right. This was his house. And Dan saw no point in inciting Chuck or making Henry more upset than he already was. Dan was fairly confident, however, that in this instance Chuck could be trusted to do what Eleanor asked of him. And if somehow Chuck didn't show, God help him.

Dan took a seat near Blair's room and looked at the time on his phone. Calculating the time it took to get a five year old changed...who knew how long it was supposed to take? Dan anxiously looked up from his perch each time the elevator doors opened. And deflated each time Henry and Chuck failed to appear.

The doors opened yet again, but this time he was caught off guard by the sight of Lily and Serena. "Awesome..." he thought. He had no report on Blair. Henry and Chuck were MIA again. And now his current wife and mother in law slash ex stepmother had just arrived.

Dan observed as Lily walked up to the nurse's station, asking to be pointed in the direction of Blair's room. At this point they were both oblivious to Dan's presence, though surely they had to know he'd be around. He watched Serena as she leaned in to tell her mother something. He was quickly spotted as they made their way down the hall. Serena stopped for a moment, instantly looking away from Dan. Lily tugged her daughter by the coat and prodded her to sit down on a bench far away from Dan-all while staring daggers in Dan's direction. He began to recoil, wondering if he might not just find a place to steer clear for a while-maybe go grab a cup of coffee.

But...no. How could he possibly go anywhere? There were too many unknowns with Blair. And additionally, if Chuck didn't show up soon, he was going to have to hunt him down and plant a Humphrey bitch slap on him.

As if on cue, the elevator doors opened again and Chuck and Henry appeared. Dan breathed a sigh of relief now that he had one less thing to worry about. It appeared to Dan that Chuck had been struggling with Henry, using all the strength he had to keep his son from getting away. It showed on his face.

He was still barely holding on to him as they stepped off the elevator. Henry was finally able to extricate himself from his father's arms at the sight of Serena and Lily, pushing Chuck away roughly as he ran to Lily. Chuck's face became emotionless again as he followed behind his son, coming face to face with Lily and Serena. Lily was now stroking Henry's hair and Serena was sitting him down in her lap. Serena somehow managed to sneak in a quick scowl in Dan's direction while Chuck made quick eye contact with him but remained stone faced.

Dan rolled his eyes. His ears were burning already.

He sighed and looked at Blair's door. What the fuck was the hold up!?

Down the hall, Chuck wasn't sure what to make of Serena and Lily's presence, especially considering their current opinion of Blair.

"I'm surprised to see you both here," Chuck stated flatly.

"Eleanor asked us to come," she sighed. "We're here to pick up Henry," she explained. "And to support you," she added.

Chuck said nothing. He looked up for a moment to see Dan pacing in front of Blair's room.

This whole thing was his fucking fault.

"Serena, why don't you take Henry to get a snack? Charles and I have a few things to discuss." Serena plastered on a smile as she grabbed Henry's hand.

"What do you think? Do they have banana splits here?" She gave him a playful tickle and he giggled, obviously in significantly better spirits than he was just a few minutes earlier. Chuck and Lily watched as they disappeared into the waiting elevator.

Lily turned to look at Chuck. His head was down now and he seemed tired, defeated. She bit her lip for a moment and watched him.

"What exactly happened to Blair? Eleanor didn't give me any details."

Chuck shook his head as if it physically pained him to relive the whole ordeal. "I don't know...We um, we walked into the apartment and-" He normally didn't have a problem confiding in Lily, but this was different. She knew what he had done, and it killed him to think he could have lost her respect with one poor decision. His father was the monster. Not him. But today he had used his son as a weapon. Thanks to Blair and Dan, of course.

"Blair was upset," he continued. "She didn't know where we were. And then she...I remember she was hugging Henry and crying and maybe it just...it was..." His words started to trail off and there was a distant look in his eyes. Lily watched as Chuck's head sunk lower. She rubbed his back soothingly as he lifted his head up again to look at Dan.

Why him?

She'd dated Dan before. There was a reason it hadn't worked out. Just like there was a reason it didn't work out with Nate. It was Chuck and Blair. Blair and Chuck. And it always would be. They were magnetic. No matter what happened, they would find their way back to one another.

Chuck shook his head in anger as he recalled the sight of Dan Humphrey carrying Blair to the couch. His hands _all_ over her-rubbing down her arms, caressing her cheek, massaging her neck and shoulders.

It was disgusting.

"Why would she do this to us?" he whispered to himself, but still loudly enough for Lily to hear. She followed Chuck's gaze and for a moment they both watched Dan as he leaned up against the glass window to Blair's room. Lily turned back to Chuck, a grave look on her face.

"It hurts, I know Charles. But please...please tell me you weren't going to kidnap that child." Chuck shrugged but said nothing. The truth was he could have been halfway over the Atlantic by now. No one but the pilots and the flight attendant knew where they were going, and he paid them plenty to stay quiet. Henry would have gotten over it eventually. Plus he loved "Miss Eva."

"Charles..." Lily grabbed Chuck's hand firmly, trying to summon some sort of response.

"I know this is hard. It's hard on Serena as well. What Dan and Blair did was wrong. But what they did has nothing to do with Henry. So please. Do not punish your child for his mother's transgressions." Again, she waited for a reply but he said nothing. She was beginning to wonder if he was having some sort of psychotic break.

"Do you understand what I'm saying?" Lily asked, still fairly calm but growing increasingly frustrated. Chuck nodded, his gaze still planted firmly on Dan.

Got it, Chuck thought. Do not punish child. _Punish Humphrey_.

Lily sighed, unconvinced she was making any headway. "Charles. Eleanor asked if I would keep Henry for a few days. Until Blair is feeling better...and until you..." Chuck's eyes narrowed as he looked at Lily. So his mother in law was ordering him around _and _making living arrangements for his son now.

Perfect.

Lily knew that was the last thing Chuck wanted to hear, but he had done himself no favors. The last thing Lily wanted was for her son to end up in a messy custody battle with Blair, and Lily knew that no judge would be able to just gloss over Chuck's latest incident, despite Blair's recent behavior. Cooperation with Blair-and Eleanor-would be key at this point.

"I know you and Blair have things to discuss," Lily said. That was putting things mildly. "And I think Eleanor understands that everyone's emotions are in a very fragile place right now. It will be good for Henry to be some place stable right now." Chuck's eyes fired open and he turned to look at her. The word "stable" had sparked something.

He suddenly realized he still had some vigor left in him and he wasn't even close to done fighting for Blair and his family. There was no way Blair would want Henry raised in a broken home. Chuck just had to appeal to her from that aspect. Yes, what he had done was bad. But there was no doubt in his mind that after coming clean, being honest and emotional with her about his fears of losing her and of breaking up their family she would forgive him. She would see that they needed each other. They always had. And he could easily forgive her for Humphrey. And he would own up to all of the damage he himself had inflicted on his family. She knew none of those women ever meant anything to him anyway.

Chuck thought about it for a moment.

"You know. You're right," Chuck smiled, completely perked up now. "This will be good. For everyone. Henry loves staying with you. He loves that new X-box you got him. And it will give Blair and I a chance to really clear the air. Make things right again." Lily was slightly disturbed by Chuck's comments. He seemed to have an overly simplistic view of events and there were traces of delusion in his statements. And his mood had just shifted so rapidly. She was seriously wondering if she needed to flag down a doctor.

Chuck quickly stood up. "I'll make sure to get a bag packed for Henry and I'll get the driver drop it off. Now if you'll excuse me. I'm going to go check on my wife," he said as he started walking in the direction of Blair's room.

"Charles wait-" Lily said, growing deeply concerned.

Chuck didn't turn around.

* * *

Several thousand miles away, it was painfully early in Sydney. But being an international business man, Jack Bass's internal clock wasn't set to any particular time zone. He sat in his extravagant office in his amazing apartment overlooking Sydney Harbour, relaxing in his chair. Life was good. Well, business wise. His personal life was testing him these days.

He turned on his computer and began checking his email. Of note was an email from one of Bass Industries' key investors, Rich Haley. Bass recently went into negotiations on a fabulous site in Hong Kong that Rich had helped facilitate. Jack smiled. Maybe he had another site recommendation?

He clicked on the email: "Jack. It's seems like Chuck might have his hands full for a while. Probably best if we put Hong Kong on hold. I'll be in touch. Best, Rich." Jack shook his head in confusion, clicking on a link that Rich had forwarded to him. It was a link to Page Six. Jack clicked and read the headline aloud.

"Blair Waldorf Bass Caught in the Act."

"WHAT!" Jack roared as he stood up from his chair. He didn't even have to read the whole article to know what this meant, and what it meant for his business. It had already started.

"NOOOOO! FUUUUUCK! NO! SON OF A BITCH!"

He grabbed his Rubik's cube pen holder and slammed it against the door. Not a minute later his office door opened. Georgina Sparks Bass stood in a bathrobe in the doorway, hand on hip, an annoyed look on her face as she picked up the pen holder from off the floor.

"You know how I feel about that kind of language, Jack," Georgina said, seemingly unfazed by the fact it was three in the morning. This kind of thing really was par for the course in their household. Jack mumbled something under his breath, but didn't acknowledge her. Her eyed narrowed on his computer screen.

"What seems to be the problem?" Georgina asked.

"There's no problem," Jack lied. "Have a business thing in New York. Last minute. I need to go pack." Georgina was immediately suspicious. If what he said was true, it was quite the overreaction.

"New York? I could go for a trip to New York. When do we leave?"

"_We_ don't. This is business. Can't have any distractions," he said harshly as he closed out his email on his computer screen. Georgina popped her bottom lip out and crossed her arms. She took a step forward, agitation building.

"You know, you said this 'down under' thing was going to be temporary. I _need _my hard New York winters. We've been down here so long that Milo is picking up an accent. He refers to his flip flops as 'thongs' and his underwear as 'undies.' My life has gone straight down the dunny can!" she cried.

Jack looked up, hoping she was finally done talking. She wasn't.

"The people here are entirely too laid back and welcoming. They just start talking to you for no reason. I mean who does that? I need to return to civilization." Jack walked over to his wife.

"As I've told you. This is a business trip. I won't have time to entertain you. Or the kid. You're staying here." With that, Jack abruptly walked past her, slamming the door behind him.

Georgina stood in her spot for a moment. She looked around, zoning in on Jack's computer screen. She walked over to the desk and had a seat in the chair. She looked to the door, giving Jack one more moment to come back if he was going to. Georgina clicked on the mouse to bring the screen up. Without hesitation she clicked on Jack's inbox.

Yes. She knew the password.

She clicked on the first email she saw. A tiny smirk appeared as she clicked on the provided link. And when she read the article, she could hear the angels sing.

"Well bugger me!" Her blue eyes sparkled as she read the article over and over. It was a sign. She was being beckoned home.

"New York here I come."

* * *

Lily watched anxiously as Chuck walked directly in a path towards Dan. Dan had seen him stand up and make his way over, but didn't think Chuck would engage him. He was wrong.

Chuck walked over to stand just behind him and Dan turned around, preparing himself for a less than pleasant conversation.

"Once again, Humphrey, you've shown up where you're not welcome. This is a time for family. You need to leave." Dan was face to face with Chuck now. A scorned Chuck Bass who also appeared to be in denial.

Nothing says family like kidnapping your kid.

"Chuck. After what you've put everyone through today, I'm pretty sure you're the one who's not welcome." Dan began to walk off, trying to avoid any further confrontation. Not that he didn't have plenty more to say, but his priority right now was Blair. Unfortunately Chuck wasn't going to let it go that easily.

"Last time I checked, Humphrey, Blair is still my wife. And she'll remain my wife. She's angry with me, so she's been using you. It's understandable. But the sooner you understand that, the sooner you can spare yourself the humiliation of being dumped again and move on."

Dan couldn't believe what he was hearing. Surely Chuck wasn't that obtuse.

"If that's what you think, Chuck, then you might need to reevaluate what's really going on here. And you might want to visit the mental health facility here." Again Dan attempted to walk away, but Chuck's mouth wouldn't stop.

"Blair and I share a mutual respect for one another. No one understands her like I do. And I can tell you that she doesn't respect you. She never did." Chuck let out a small laugh. "Remember the time she didn't even bother to tell you she was leaving you for me? If memory serves, you had to go and drown your sorrows 'on camera.' Heard your performance was award worthy. Maybe you could see if Serena's up for another go?"

Dan knew better than to take the bait, but he was on edge and Chuck was really pressing him. "Chuck," Dan stated as calmly as possible. "You don't understand Blair at all. And you have repeatedly shown that you have no regard for her or your family. You may still technically be married, but you no longer have a _marriage_. It's only a matter of time before it's official." Chuck was smirking now.

"You know, you're a fucking hypocrite, Humphrey. I'm pretty sure Serena could say the same thing about you regarding your 'sanctity of family' bullshit."

Dan didn't want to go tit for tat with Chuck. But there was an obvious difference. Dan's relationship with Blair was real. Not to mention Serena hadn't been showing andy regard for him when she was sleeping with Nate. And Chuck knew that.

Against his better judgment, Dan took a step towards Chuck. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you not sleep with most of Henry's nannies. Traipse around Singapore with Eva a few weeks ago? Did Blair not find a pair of someone's random crotchless panties in your briefcase last month? Oh wait, let me guess. That was a symbol of that respect you have for Blair. That mutual understanding." Chuck cringed at the intimate details which Blair had obviously provided Dan. "I'm sure they go great with that Emerald necklace," Dan provoked.

"Humphrey," Chuck seethed. "You know nothing about my marriage. Or Blair. Just like you knew nothing seven years ago. But keep pretending that you and Blair have a future together. It'll make it that much sweeter when she comes running back to me again. Maybe she'll even have the decency to tell you she's leaving this time." Dan's fist started to clench and he told himself to walk away. But he couldn't. He continued to stand there and listen to Chuck's verbal taunts.

"You still can't compete with me, Humphrey. And now Blair and I have a child together. Could you imagine Blair ever wanting to have_ your _child? Her body would probably reject it immediately."

And that was it. Ask and he shall receive.

Dan's left fist struck Chuck's face like a lightning bolt, laying Chuck out on the floor in one strike. From the corner of his eye, Dan could see Lily bolt up from her seat, quickly making her way towards them. Chuck lay there for a moment, dazed and clutching his jaw.

"You want to go two for two?" Dan quipped.

Chuck glared at Dan, scrambling up to his feet. Before Dan knew what was happening, Chuck was lunging at him, grabbing him by the collar and pressing him up against the glass window. A couple of nurses quickly caught the attention of a security guard, who immediately called for backup.

Chuck was up in Dan's face now, giving him another hard shove into the glass. Dan cringed with pain as his head rammed back against it. "You know, when you started sleeping with my wife you made a very poor decision." The door to Blair's room suddenly swung open and a distressed Eleanor popped her head out. Dr. Milner, Blair's doctor, stepped out and immediately yelled for them to stop. Chuck leaned in even closer then, centimeters from Dan's face, speaking so low that Dan could barely hear him. "I am going to destroy you. You'll be lucky to get a job as a fucking cater waiter. Blair. Is. Mine."

"Charles. Let him go!" Lily clapped her hands as if calling a dog as she raced up and stood beside Eleanor.

"CHUCK!" Eleanor shrieked. Chuck let go just as the security guard and a police officer came up behind him and grabbed him off of Dan.

"What is the matter with both of you?!" Eleanor roared.

"To be fair, Dan punched him first," Lily piped in, out of breath from her trek. Dan shook his head as he adjusted his collar. Leave it to Lily to take St. Chuck's side again.

"Alright. Both of you are going to need to come with me," the officer instructed, nodding for the security guard to handcuff Dan while he cuffed Chuck. Dan's head rolled back in disgust as he realized he'd walked himself right into Chuck's web.

Lily advanced forward, stepping up to the officer before Dan and Chuck could be taken away. "Officer, I'm Lily Bass van der Woodsen. I believe I recognize you. You broke up a party at my penthouse several years ago." She smiled. "I can't tell you how grateful I was. Kids were literally banging down the door. Our poor door man had nightmares," Lily laughed. Dan rolled his eyes.

A slight smile crept over the officer's face. "I remember that. Thought we were going to have to break out the riot gear," he joked.

"The man you are handcuffing is Charles Bass," she explained. The officer's demeanor instantly changed as recognition set in. "His wife was just admitted and we're all just a little bit on edge today," Lily explained. "This was just a small disagreement that got a bit out of hand. Do we really need the formality of the handcuffs and-"

"Disorderly conduct on hospital grounds is a serious offense. Fighting obviously poses a significant danger to the patients, as well as hospital staff and visitors. We can't have that," the officer replied.

"Well I certainly agree. But what if they just agree to leave the hospital peacefully? It would save you some paperwork and I'm sure you will have their word it won't happen again." The officer looked at Chuck, then Dan. After a brief pause, he nodded. "I am pretty backed up already. A lot of New Year's mishaps." He began to take the handcuffs off Chuck and motioned for Dan's to be removed as well.

Dan couldn't believe the Lily van der Woodsen name drop and the "I'm Chuck Bass" shit was actually going to work. Then again, if letting your father spiral to his death from a skyscraper couldn't get you arrested, nothing would.

"You're lucky you have someone like Mrs. van der Woodsen to speak up for both of you." Lily smiled graciously at the officer. Dan was physically repulsed.

"Now go on ahead," the officer said. "I need you completely off of hospital grounds." The officer seemed to only be speaking to Dan at this point. Dan looked around in confusion, making eye contact with Eleanor. Whatever sort of telepathic understanding he had found in her earlier seemed to have officially evaporated.

"GO!" the officer warned Dan one last time. Dan was officially dumbfounded. How had it gone from both of them being told to leave to just Dan? He walked slowly.

The door to Blair's room was open as he walked past Eleanor and the doctor. He turned to look inside as he walked past. Blair listlessly tilted her head up. She was groggy and obviously confused.

Dan turned around to see Chuck speaking to the officer, and Lily nodding and talking to Eleanor as the doctor walked back into Blair's room. Chuck looked up and gave him a quick smirk before Dan took his place on the elevator. The doors closed.

He had sunk to Chuck's level. And now Chuck was reaping the rewards. Dan banged his head against the elevator wall. Bad idea. He already had a headache from Chuck banging his head into the glass.

As he stepped off the elevator in search of a place to sit-because there was no way he was leaving the hospital altogether-he nearly ran into Serena head on. She held on to Henry's hand tightly. She immediately rolled her eyes as she elbowed past him onto the waiting elevator.

"Leaving so soon?" she asked snidely as she stepped inside.

Dan chose not to respond as Serena shot him a look.

"Come on, Henry." She grabbed his hand, but before she could get him all the way inside, he turned to Dan and waved.

It caught him completely off guard.

Henry had just waved at him and Dan wasn't really sure how to take it. Was it a sarcastic wave? A sort of "kick him while he's down my dad just powned you" wave? He was Chuck's kid after all. Or maybe he was just being polite.

Dan was exhausted as he collapsed on a waiting room couch, pondering the motives of a five year old and that five year old's vile father's shameless and disgusting statements that somehow managed to get him kicked out of the hospital.

And he also pondered how he was going to get back up to Blair's room unnoticed.

* * *

"Well, that was quite...something." Dr. Milner was still reeling from the earlier outburst. "The tests should be back from the lab shortly," the short, gray haired doctor informed Eleanor and Blair before checking his watch and jotting down a few notes on Blair's chart. "Til then, we'll just let the fluids do their thing and I'll be back to check on you soon. Eleanor, it was great catching up with you as always. Tell Cyrus I look forward to seeing him when he's back in town."

"Of course," Eleanor replied as she smiled and nodded.

The doctor made a few more notes in Blair's chart before exiting the room. A still groggy yet now annoyed Blair lay in bed, hooked up to an IV. She had heard the ruckus outside the door earlier, but no one had bothered to fill her in on what actually happened.

"Now, can you please tell me what just happened out there? Also, I would like to be discharged immediately."

Eleanor took a seat in the chair next to Blair's bed and surveyed her daughter. She was still very angry with her, but it was a relief to see she had at gotten some of her "bite" back-even if she could barely keep her eyes open.

"You're not ready to be discharged, Blair."

"I am fine," she retorted with as much energy as she could muster.

"Blair. Anyone who passes out from dehydration and exhaustion is not _fine_."

"Well, can you please go get Dan? I need to talk to him. And is Henry here? I think he should be in here with me."

Eleanor exhaled, exasperated with Blair barking orders at her after everything she and her husband had managed to put her through in the last twenty-four hours. "Dan and Chuck were asked to leave the premises. They got into an altercation." Blair looked up, concerned. She should have been able to pick up on what was happening right outside of her own door, but she wasn't feeling exactly sharp today.

"An altercation? Is Dan okay? I should probably call him." Blair began to prop herself up on her elbows.

It didn't escape Eleanor that Blair was asking about Dan and not Chuck.

"I will call and update him later. Now lie back down. You need to rest." It was clear from her mother's facial expression that she was done talking about Dan and Chuck. Blair took in her mother's tired facade and immediately felt guilty. Guilty from causing her worry after fleeing the party. Guilty for her having to deal with Chuck's craziness-and hers, too.

Blair did as she was told. She watched Eleanor take off her bifocals, rubbing her eyes wearily.

Blair began to sink back into her pillow. "I'm sorry, Mother," Blair whispered. "Sorry you're having to deal with all of this. And with me." Eleanor looked up suddenly.

"You're my daughter. Where else would I be?" she said, grabbing a napkin and cleaning her glasses. "I suppose keeping me on my toes is a Waldorf tradition that both you and your father seem fond of."

Blair managed to crack a smile, relieved that her mother now seemed to be speaking to her calmly as opposed to how she was speaking to her back at the apartment.

All was silent for a few minutes, until Blair began to fidget. The realization was setting in that in the next few minutes, the doctor could possibly be confirming what she already knew. She swallowed hard as another wave a nausea struck. Blair closed her eyes, thinking of anything she could in order to stave it off. Rainbows. Unicorns. Henry...

Her eyes shot open.

"So where is Henry?" she asked again.

Eleanor paused for a moment. "He is here. He just went for a snack. He'll be back shortly." Blair eyed her mother curiously. She refused to get Botox. Therefore, Blair knew she definitely wasn't getting the whole story.

"Went for a snack with whom?"

"With...Serena," Eleanor responded casually. Blair closed her eyes with disgust, another bout of nausea on the way.

"Mother, I do not want my son hanging around Serena."

"Well I don't know why not. I mean, aside from the fact that you and her husband..." Eleanor paused. She couldn't even say it. "Henry loves Serena," Eleanor continued. "And despite _everything_, Lily and Serena rushed right over here when they heard you were in the hospital."

"Yes I'm sure they came right over here for me. They're just going to poison him against me!" Blair whined, her hormones kicking in. "Please just go get him and bring him to me."

"Do not be ridiculous, Blair! No one is poisoning anyone. I called Lily because I wanted to be able to look after you and make sure your scoundrel of a husband doesn't take off with your son again!" Blair covered her face with her hands.

It was coming.

A worried Eleanor watched as Blair gagged. Blair motioned in the direction of an empty pink bin that she could puke into. Eleanor understood immediately, grabbed it, and quickly handed to her. She looked away as Blair dry heaved into it. After a minute, the puking sound seemed to stop and Eleanor looked back up to see Blair lying back against the pillows, looking absolutely miserable.

Eleanor studied Blair's face. Her eyes were shut and Eleanor could tell she was concentrating, perhaps fighting the urge to dry heave again. "Blair," Eleanor sighed, concerned. "What is going on? Is this...is this stress or..."

"Mother..." Blair opened her eyes. She couldn't say anything else. She didn't want to be having this conversation now. Or ever. Though she knew it was inevitable.

"Please, Blair. I have no idea why you feel like you cannot talk to me!" Blair could see the formation of tears in her mother's eyes and closed her eyes again at the sight.

"I don't want to disappoint you."

Eleanor's mouth fell open. "How can you possibly disappoint me when I don't even know what's going on with you these days?" Eleanor was trying in vain to keep her frustration in check. "I thought your taking over my company would bring us closer. That it would give us something to bond over. Something we could grow together. But I'm lucky to ever even get you on the phone. And now you and-" Blair listened as she looked down at her fingers, taking in her now dreadful looking manicure. She understood what her mother was saying.

"I just can't help thinking that pushing you into WD was a huge mistake. Because look at you. You've just...deteriorated."

Blair looked down at the IV tubes sticking out of her arms before responding. "You're right, Mother. I'm no good for your company-"

"Blair, that's not what I'm saying. You are my daughter. You are capable of doing whatever you want. But if your heart isn't in it, you're going to be completely miserable."

Blair nodded.

"And that goes for other things as well," Eleanor added pointedly.

"I want to support you, Blair. With whatever you choose to do. But you have to talk to me." Before Blair could respond, a knock on the door interrupted them.

They both looked up to see Dr. Milner enter. He looked at Eleanor, then turned to smile at Blair. "Okay, we've got the test results here. Blair..." He hesitated for a moment. "Is Mom okay to be in here while we talk or do you want to fill her in later?" Eleanor was insulted by Dr. Milner's question. And a little confused. She wasn't going anywhere.

Blair looked at her mother. After a thoughtful pause, she finally replied.

"I would like her to stay."

* * *

Dan exhaled in his chair. It had been an hour since he was "asked" to leave. He was eyeing the stairwell, calculating the odds of making it up to Blair's room without being seen when his phone rang.

"Jenny, I can't really talk right now, I'm-"

"Dan..." Jenny Humphrey was trying to remain calm but what she was currently looking at was making that impossible. "Did you know you're on Page Six?!" Jenny squealed through the phone. "I cannot even believe what I'm reading. You made out with Blair at Eleanor's party! Holy shit, Dan!" Dan closed his eyes. He didn't have time to indulge his sister and her insatiable need for gossip.

"We weren't making out, we kissed." Oh who was he kidding, they were making out. "Jenny, I can't do this right now-"

"Oh, are you getting 'busy' with Blair? And from the picture they published it looks like a full on make out to me."

Dan sat up in his seat. "Oh shit. There's really a picture?" Jenny paused for a moment.

"Nah, just messing with you. Though I'm sure someone had to have taken a pic with their camera phone. Or a recording. Serena, perhaps?" Dan clenched his teeth together.

"The article does list everyone you two 'performed' in front of including but not limited to: your wife, her husband, her mother, your mother in law, Nate, Kate Young, Brad Goreski, Jeanne Yang, Elizabeth Stewart, and all of the buyers from the four B's!" Dan began to rub his temples.

"God why I am stuck here in Paris! I'm missing everything! So what did they say? Chuck and Serena, I mean?" Dan threw his head back in frustration.

"I can't really get into it right now," Dan looked up to see the police officer from earlier making a beeline straight towards him. "Ah shit."

"Hey YOU!" the officer yelled out. "I told you. You need to be completely off of hospital grounds!"

"Is that person talking to you? You're at the hospital?" Jenny's tone immediately changed to one of confusion. Dan waved at the officer and slowly made his way toward the front door. If Jenny hadn't been distracting him, perhaps he could have been able to see the officer coming and made himself a bit more inconspicuous. He turned around once more to see the officer glaring back at him.

"I _was_ at the hospital. Just got thrown out," Dan said as he stepped onto 77th street.

"Why did you get thrown out of a hospital!? And why are you even at a hospital?"

"Well technically Chuck and I were both told to leave, but for some reason he's still up there and I'm walking out the door. I'm so fucking pissed off right now-" Dan was talking to himself more at this point than he was actually talking to his sister.

"Dan!" Jenny sighed. She needed details. "Can you please be a little more specific as to what exactly you did and why you're at the hospital?"

"Blair fainted. Chuck tried to kidnap Henry. She was stressed-"

"Jesus. He was really going to kidnap him?"

"Yeah, but apparently he got cold feet."

"So why did you get kicked out?"

"I punched Chuck." Dan could hear her chuckling. "Was it a good one?"

Dan shrugged. "He hit the deck. Of course then he went and body slammed me into the window, but still...he hit the deck." It truly was a magnificent punch if he did say so himself. He just didn't want to brag.

"So is Blair okay?"

"I think...I don't know really know for sure, honestly. I don't even know where I'm going right now!" He looked for a street sign to tell him where he was. At that moment he looked down to see another incoming call. It wasn't a number he knew. But he wanted to answer it just in case it was related to Blair.

"Jenny, I have another call coming in I'll ring you back."

"You always say that but you-"

Dan quickly switched over before Jenny could finish her sentence. He answered tentatively, "Hello?" After a brief pause, he immediately recognized the voice on the other end of the line.

"Daniel."

It was Eleanor.

"Blair asked me to call you." Dan wasn't sure why those words sounded so ominous, but anytime "someone asks someone to call someone" it doesn't normally bode well. Dan was already bracing himself.

"Blair is doing better. They'll probably release her tonight." Dan sighed with relief before he realized her tone wasn't the most comforting. Neither was the impossibly long pause that followed. Dan swallowed hard, bracing himself for what was to come.

"Daniel, I know there are certain things you are privy to about Blair's current condition. And considering the circumstances, I think the best thing to do would be to take her back to the penthouse with me tonight." He could hear her take a breath.

"I believe it would also be best if you kept your distance tonight." Dan was taken aback by Eleanor's request.

"Is that coming from you or from Blair?"

"It's coming from both of us," Eleanor replied curtly. "Blair doesn't need the distraction or added pressure of you and Chuck weighing down on her while she's recovering." Dan considered the pomposity of this for a moment.

"With all due respect, I'm not the one pressuring her. And I'm definitely not the cause of her stress." Dan may have been accusing Eleanor of something and she may have picked up on it. Probably not the best course to take.

"Regardless, Daniel. This is the best thing for everybody right now. Understand that if you come to my home tonight to see Blair, you will be turned away by the door man." Eleanor didn't wait for his reply before hanging up.

Dan stood speechless on Lexington Avenue.

* * *

A few hours later, Blair was relaxing in her hospital bed, Henry lying next to her. "So we're obviously going to hit up the duck pond. But then should we do Serendipity or Dylan's? Or both?" Henry was barely listening as his mother rambled on and on, planning a mother-son day. "And of course we have to go to the Met," she said as she hugged Henry tightly. Blair's release from the hospital was imminent-she was just waiting on her mother to get back and they would be on their way. Just a few hours earlier, Blair had been puking her guts out. But after a dicylomine injection and a couple of IV bags she was feeling like a new woman. Especially now that her son was sitting beside her.

"Mom, you have to drink this and then eat this cracker," Henry commanded, lifting the cracker to his mother's mouth. "Okay." She took a bite as she continued to talk.

"Well, what we should do is make a spreadsheet when we get home and cross-reference locations with-"

"Now drink this," Henry once again ordered. "Okay." Their heads both sprung up at the sound of the door opening. "I bet it's time to go," Blair said excitedly, starting to prod Henry up and off of her. But it wasn't Eleanor. It was Chuck.

Blair instantly deflated at the sight of him. He walked in tentatively, softly closing the door behind him. Chuck smiled as he watched Henry arrange a row of crackers for Blair's consumption, then looked up to make eye contact with Blair. "How's the patient?" he asked his son. Or Blair. Or whoever would answer.

Henry didn't hesitate to answer, and he didn't seem to harbor any ill feelings for his father from earlier. "She feels better. But she still has to eat all of this and then drink all of this," he explained as he motioned to the saltines and juice sitting in front of them.

"Well, help her get finished. Lily's waiting for you when you're done." Blair looked up.

"What do you mean Lily's waiting for him?"

"Your mother didn't tell you? She's arranged for Henry to stay with Lily for a few days. You're recuperating. And I suppose I'm not..." Chuck didn't need to say "trustworthy" for Blair to figure out what he meant. But she was surprised he was honestly assessing himself. Blair wasn't sure how she would classify her feelings for Chuck in this moment, but there seemed to be an air of humility about him.

Still. The only thing keeping her from launching herself off the bed and throttling him was the fact that her son was in the room.

"Well he's not going with Lily," Blair said indignantly. Chuck shrugged. It hadn't been his idea anyway. Though now he was counting on Henry going with Lily in order to get some alone time with his wife.

Blair continued to take bites and sips under the supervision of her son, as well as the watchful eye of Chuck. His relaxed demeanor was making her increasingly uncomfortable.

"Were you not asked to leave the hospital?" she suddenly blurted.

"I was hoping to talk to you, Blair," Chuck responded, completely bypassing the question. "Perhaps we can-" Eleanor opened the door, dismayed to find Blair and a placid Chuck actually having a peaceful looking conversation. She eyed him warily, and promptly shoved the prescription bag she was carrying into her purse.

"Blair are you all right?" a concerned Eleanor asked, surprised to see that Chuck was even in the hospital.

"Mother, please tell Lily she can leave. We won't be needing her services," she announced, not even trying to hide her displeasure with the fact that her mother had arranged a slumber party for Henry with Lily. She then turned to Chuck. "And you can leave as well."

"Blair, I want to-"

"This is not the time, Chuck," Eleanor warned. "Now go home." She hadn't even considered her tone in front of Henry towards his father.

Chuck fought to bite his tongue. He had been expecting this reaction from Blair and Eleanor, but that didn't make it any easier. Getting Blair's forgiveness would be a process. A long one. But as long as he was the father of Blair's child, he was convinced he had the upper hand.

Chuck walked over to kiss Henry on the top of the head, making sure to hold eye contact with Blair for a moment. "I'll call you tomorrow to check on you. I'm truly sorry, Blair." There was something in Chuck's eyes that caught Blair off guard. He seemed to mean what he was saying. She then watched as he ran his fingers through his son's hair before giving him one more kiss. "Bye, buddy." Eleanor and Blair watched as Chuck turned and walked out.

For a moment, Blair was a little dazed by Chuck's behavior, but she soon snapped out of it.

"Mother, go and tell her!"

"Blair it's already been arranged. Lily doesn't mind-"

"Mother-" Eleanor nodded, finally getting the message. She was honestly just concerned for her daughter's well being and didn't want her overdoing it.

"But if there's so much as a hint of nausea Blair-"

"Fine." She then turned her attention back to Henry as a worried Eleanor looked on.

"But there won't be."

* * *

"Fainted? I could see she was in bad shape but...that must have been some kind of food poisoning." Rufus Humphrey was genuinely shocked as he stood at his kitchen island, replacing the last string of new set on his guitar.

"Well, you know. It wasn't just food poisoning. She was also a little stressed out because, you know, Chuck was trying to kidnap her son." Dan might have left out the biggest cog in the story. Rufus shook his head. "How do you know for sure?"

"Uh, maybe because Chuck picked Henry up before dawn, was seen flying away on the Bass jet, had his phone turned off and couldn't be reached for several hours?"

Rufus nodded. "That is what it sounds like. So he couldn't go through with it? Maybe Chuck's got a conscience after all," Rufus said as he started to tune.

"Dad, are you...are you actually defending him?"

"No," Rufus promptly replied. "But it's good to know that even people we think the worst of can end up doing the right thing." Dan shook his head. His father always tried to see the best in people which was surprising because Chuck had been the source of a lot of trauma in the Humphrey household. All Dan could think about was Chuck's statement about Blair's body rejecting his baby.

"And uh...tell me again how you got kicked out of the hospital?"

Dan looked down at his phone, hoping that if he willed it so, Blair would call or text. Though he knew she wasn't currently in possession of her phone. Perhaps she would be soon.

"Because that person who did the right thing said the wrong thing." Rufus suddenly had an "a-ha" moment.

"Meaning you-"

"Kicked his ass." Rufus tried to keep himself from laughing. Not that Dan couldn't kick someone's ass, he just never had. "Okay, maybe not kick his ass," Dan shrugged. "But I did punch him, and his face did hit the floor and my hand is...a little swollen." He also had a headache, though if it was from stress or the glass of Blair's hospital room, he wasn't sure. Rufus grabbed Dan's hand, surveying the damage. It didn't look too bad to him but he quickly grabbed a bag of frozen peas from the freezer and lay it on top of Dan's hand anyway.

"He's just the biggest asshole on the planet, Dad. And I don't understand what Blair's thinking? I mean, why did she have Eleanor call me? Why didn't she call herself?" Dan was getting worked up and Rufus couldn't quite understand why.

"Well if she wasn't feeling well-" Dan gave his father a dubious look. "You know Blair's probably going to call you just as soon as she gets home. You also know Eleanor has always been a bit overreactive when it comes to Blair. You're lucky she even called to give you an update." Rufus was right about that. At least he knew his child and the mother of his child were okay.

"Look, Dan. Knowing Blair, she's...going to do what she wants. Whether her mother likes it or not."

Dan continued to dwell. "Every entrance I tried they turned me away, Dad. While CHUCK got to stay up there and play the role of caring husband. What a crock!"

"Well I'd be surprised if she really wanted to see him after what happened. But I think you're going a bit overboard here. What's the big deal? It was food poisoning. You two aren't married. You took care of her last night. Let her mother play her part tonight." Dan wanted to come clean with his Dad and let him know the big deal was that Blair was carrying his child, but something was telling him to wait. This was his and Blair's little creation. Their secret. And apparently now Eleanor's...

But it was still something that he wanted to experience with her without the entire world knowing. And it was something he was missing now as they sat here in Brooklyn. And the fact that Eleanor told him to steer clear was bugging him even more.

Rufus studied Dan, knowing he wasn't making any headway with him. He remembered how insecure Dan had been last time he dated Blair, but how he still told Dan he needed to trust her. He ended up following her to a mansion slash brothel, and of course that was the beginning of the end. As it turns out he had good reason to be insecure. Rufus worried if the same thing would happen again-if Blair would somehow break his heart. Because from the looks of things, Dan seemed almost obsessed. If things didn't work out his time, he could see Dan going straight off the deep end.

Dan walked over to the couch and slumped down. Maybe his father was right. He could placate Eleanor for now. Maybe she just needed Blair to need her for awhile. If it meant getting Eleanor in a good mood, then he really had no problem with it.

"Hey. Why don't I order in Chinese?" Rufus's voice called out from the kitchen. Dan shrugged. "Or I can make chili?" Dan gave him a look.

"Chinese it is then."

* * *

"Miss Blair, I make special Polish 'bulion z kurczaka' for sensitive stomach." Blair suspiciously eyed the clear yellow liquid Dorota was setting before her.

"It's just chicken broth, Dorota," Blair said as she crinkled her nose. Dorota nodded as she handed Blair a spoon. Blair wasn't sure if Dorota had caught on to what exactly was going on with her yet, but if she didn't she would soon. At the very least she knew about Dan. "You know, I don't think I really have a taste for this right now." Dorota frowned as Eleanor watched from her spot at the opposite end of the table. Henry sat between them. He was dripping in marinara sauce from a pile of spaghetti he had just eaten.

"Dorota," Eleanor called out through sips of tea. "Can you please take Henry for a bath now?"

"Yes, Miss Eleanor." Blair looked on as a surprisingly cooperative Henry took Dorota's hand and disappeared up the stairs. After a minute, Blair looked at Eleanor.

"Oh, um, can I have my phones back now, Mother?"

"Your phones?" Eleanor asked over her bifocals.

Blair exhaled. "Mother. Don't play dumb. I know they're in your purse."

"I cannot understand why you can't just sit here and relax, Blair. You've got your son here with you. Dorota made you some delicious looking 'bulion.'"

"Why don't you want me to talk to Dan?"

"I never said I don't want you talking to Dan."

"So you _do_ want me talking to him, then?"

Eleanor scoffed. "Well not especially." Blair leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms.

"What's your problem with Dan?" she sighed. Eleanor set down her tea cup.

"Aside from him getting you pregnant while you're both married to other people?"

And the fact that Waldorf Designs' publicist had no fewer than thirty emails from press members regarding Blair and Dan's kiss at her party.

"It does take two to tango," Blair admitted. "And could you not announce it like that?" Blair motioned with her head toward the direction of the stairs where Dorota and Henry had just ascended.

"Well that is exactly what happened," Eleanor declared as she took another sip of tea. Blair sat back up and attempted some soup, but immediately spit it back out.

"Salt much, Dorota?" she yelled in the direction of the stairs.

"So then what are your plans, Blair? He's divorcing Serena. You're going to divorce Chuck?" Eleanor heaved a sigh. "And you think it's just going to be happily ever after now with you and Dan?" Blair shrugged. She was sure it wouldn't be that easy, but she didn't appreciate the mocking.

"I am worried for you, Blair. Because I am not going to be able to stay in New York with you forever. Work and Cyrus require me to be in Paris."

"I understand, Mother. But as I told you earlier at the hospital you don't have to be here to hold my hand."

"I just don't see this being an amicable divorce, Blair. Knowing your history with Chuck. And his tendency to leave town with your child without telling you. And now this pregnancy," she added in a hushed voice. "This divorce is already worse than the last one at papers haven't even been filed!"

"Well, it's not your job to worry about it. I assure you I can handle Chuck."

"Blair-"

"I can!" Eleanor sighed. There was no sense in arguing with her daughter. She was as strong willed as her mother. It was going to get bad. It was going to get ugly. But she had to trust Blair to be able to fight her own battles. Though if Chuck ever pulled something like that again, all bets would be off.

"So what we discussed-" Eleanor was conflicted. Disappointed, but at the same time relieved. "Are you sure that is what you want?"

"I think it's best for now," Blair confirmed. "Don't you think?" Eleanor took a deep breath. After Eleanor's shock from finding out about Blair's pregnancy wore off, Eleanor and Blair discussed her taking a leave of absence from Waldorf Designs. The pressure of an impending divorce and the promise of a difficult pregnancy had led them to come to that decision. "Yes, Blair. I think it is. Well I will get the ball rolling. You will of course help with the transition?"

"Of course. And I'm coming back at some point, Mother. It's just a temporary leave." Eleanor nodded, but she wasn't totally convinced.

"And you think Jenny Humphrey is capable of running things here in New York?"

"I think so." Eleanor sighed and stood up from the table. "Eat your broth," she commanded Blair. She then walked over to her purse and pulled out Blair's phones, handing them over to her. "No talking on the phone all night. You need your rest." Before she went to walk up the stairs, she quickly turned around, confused.

"Why do you have two phones?"

* * *

Dan was sitting on the couch, staring off into space. The air still smelled of Moo Shu pork and Sweet and sour chicken. It was well after midnight. The last twenty four hours had been jam packed, and he was starting to feel the effects. Dan was still irritated, but a couple of beers seemed to have mellowed him. Rufus had gone to bed and Dan was considering doing the same.

He stood up and walked into his old room. Rufus had apparently done some housekeeping, because there were no signs of Gatorade bottles or trash bags anywhere. He even seemed to have changed the sheets. Dan stripped down to his boxers and lay down on the bed. It was then that he realized how exhausted he really was, but he was already planning his course of action for tomorrow. Call the penthouse? Just show up at the penthouse? Dan hadn't tried Blair's phone in a while. The last time he tried it-both of them-the calls had gone straight to voicemail, indicating a dead battery. He reached over to pick up the phone. As if right on cue, it started to ring.

"Hey," Blair said softly before Dan could even say anything. "Are you okay?"

"Am I okay? I got kicked out of the hospital and I haven't heard from you in about fourteen hours. Oh, and your mother told me not to contact you. So no. Not really okay." He was sounding a little more agitated than he should have. Dan suddenly cursed himself for making it about him. This wasn't Blair's fault.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"No, I'm sorry," Dan quickly apologized. "Don't listen to me. I'm just really exhausted," he explained.

"Well, I'll let you go to sleep-"

"No, no don't hang up. I need to...I just want to listen to your voice," he sighed. Blair smiled on the other end of the line. "And you haven't told me how you're feeling. Or what the doctor said..."

"It was dehydration. Like we already knew. I just have to be careful and not do anything too strenuous. Keep drinking. But for now everything is back to normal. Or...you know what I mean. You really do sound tired, Dan."

"So the doctor, he ran...tests?" Blair knew what he was itching at.

"Confirmed," Blair responded promptly. Dan's eyes were closed with exhaustion, but a smile still crept upon his face. He already knew from Eleanor, but he wanted to hear her say it.

"Good," he whispered. He sounded like he was going to drift off at any moment.

"So you and Chuck. What happened? Did he say something to you or-"

"I don't want to talk about Chuck, Blair." Dan wouldn't be able to repeat what he had said anyway. Especially not to her.

"Okay," Blair said understandingly. "Well, um. I'll call you in a couple days, let you know what's going on." Dan immediately sat straight up. A couple of days?

"Oh, I thought I was going to come over in the morning..."

"Um...Oh. Well. I have Henry with me and we kind of planned a day. And my mother and I have business things to go over. And I'm sure you need to recover from the past twenty-four hours. And don't you have an appointment with your publisher or agent or something this week?" It almost sounded like she was trying to avoid him. "Oh hold on," Blair said.

"Mommy, I need some water." Dan heard Henry's voice clearly through the phone.

"Blair-"

"Dan I have to go. I'll call you okay?" Before he could say anything else she hung up.

Dan looked at his phone. _Call ended._

* * *

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE:_** **Hope everyone had a Happy Easter and Passover if you celebrate. **

**I really hated ending the chapter this way. I probably could have kept going but for my own sanity (and yours) I stopped here. Anything over the ten thousand word range probably wouldn't hold your interest. It was a very difficult chapter for me to write- the hospital scenes in particular were rewritten several times. ****I must thank Vampslaying101 for helping me brainstorm for this chapter and also for the medical information:). It's important to have fresh perspectives in order to keep the story from getting stale. Just to reiterate, this is still a Dair story no matter what Chuck thinks;)**

**Also, I hope I didn't offend any Aussies. That was just Georgina's point of view. I, personally, love Australia. **

**Thanks again for reading and for all of the positive responses. I really never expected it when I started writing this story.**

**Oh and happy Dairlevator week!**


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: Just forget what I said about the 10,000 word thing ;)**

CHAPTER 14

"That duck over there is hungry. Make sure to give him some, too, Henry." Blair pointed to a solo swimmer as she handed her son another part of a loaf. She took the opportunity to adjust his coat and straighten up his mittens before patting her son on his back and sending him on his way.

He ran over to the duck and threw a bit of the bread into the water, roaring at him to "EAT IT!" While Henry was busy feeding hungry ducks, Blair gingerly walked over to a nearby bench. Her feet were killing her as she collapsed down next to her purse and the three large shopping bags she'd been hauling. This was their fourth and hopefully last stop of the day, having begun with breakfast at Sarabeth's. The majority of the day had been spent at the Museum of Natural History in the dinosaur exhibit. They followed that up with a trip to Dylan's Candy Bar, and now they were here at the duck pond.

Henry was officially hopped up on gummy sharks. Blair needed a pillow.

She began to massage one of her aching shoulders, sore from the bags she'd been lifting. At the museum shop, they'd loaded up on an assortment of plush dinosaurs, figurines, puzzles, and books. Whatever her son wanted, Blair bought.

Truthfully, she could have forgone the duck pond today, but Henry had insisted. She was secretly hoping that he would have a sugar crash soon.

The good news was that apart from the muscle aches and the fatigue, Blair didn't feel half bad. Thanks to the Bentyl, her nausea had been minimal today, and she'd been able to keep everything she'd eaten down-granted that had only consisted of oatmeal for breakfast and a pudding cup for lunch. She knew she'd have to do better with the eating, and she was sure Dorota would assist her in that, but she didn't want to take any chances today. This was her day with Henry.

Of course Eleanor questioned her daughter if it was a good idea to venture off solo so soon after being in the hospital, but Blair insisted that she'd be fine. She wanted to make her son feel good and needed him to forget all about the horrible day he'd had yesterday-and everything his father had tried to pull. From the looks of things, she was succeeding.

Blair took one of her gloves off so she could massage her fingers deeper into her shoulder. She began to close her eyes as she kneaded, exhaling and relaxing into the bench. She really just needed to break down and book herself a massage. A few moments later, she was sure her mind was playing tricks on her. It felt like there was another set of fingers on her. Blair quickly turned around, stunned to see that there _was _another set of fingers on her shoulder. She was prepared to scream as she slowly followed those fingers up to a hand which led to an arm which led to...Chuck Bass.

"CHUCK!? What the HELL do you think you're doing? You scared the crap out of me!" She angrily slapped his hand away. She noticed he was sporting a nice sized bruise under his right cheek. Apparently Dan's little gift had really set in overnight.

"Coming to check on you," Chuck replied. He had a giant bottle of Evian in his hand. Blair scowled as he walked around the bench. He then had the gall to sit down next to her.

"You look...better," Chuck commented tentatively. He uncapped the bottle of water and handed it to her. Out of habit, she took it from him and began to drink. Luckily for him, she just happened to be thirsty. And she didn't need to get dehydrated again.

Chuck observed her as she drank. She still looked a little "off" to him-there was something different about her that he couldn't quite put his finger on. Maybe the dehydration and vomiting had caused her to lose weight? Not that he would ever tell her that.

He came here to get back on her good side. Chuck was still bearing the blame for her physical collapse and the sooner she looked "normal," the sooner he could retire his guilt. So if that meant telling her she looked better so be it.

Chuck didn't believe for one minute that he was really responsible for what happened to Blair, though. She was the one who ran off and did God knows what with Humphrey on New Year's. He may have made a horrible decision in the heat of the moment, but she was just as much to blame.

But he wasn't going to bring that up. He was turning over a new leaf and was bent on salvaging his family. Today, he wasn't even going to bring up Dan Humphrey's name.

"The doctor...he said everything is...I mean, you're okay?" he asked.

Blair gave him a perfunctory nod, not completely comfortable being alone around Chuck for the first time since he tried to leave town with their child. She scooted down on the bench a bit, away from Chuck, and then turned to watch Henry as he continued to throw bits of bread at the ducks-perhaps a bit too aggressively.

Chuck followed her lead and they sat in silence for a moment, just watching Henry.

"I tried to call you this morning," Chuck finally said, turning back to look at her.

"My cell phone is off. I didn't want any distractions today," she explained flatly.

Chuck nodded. "Well I spoke with Dorota. She said you two left early this morning." Blair found herself moving even farther in the opposite direction as Chuck scooted towards her. He continued to inspect her, troubled by her abnormally pale visage. Something definitely wasn't right. What was Humphrey doing to her?

"Figured you two would wind the day up here. As always." He smiled warmly. She exhaled and placed her glove back onto her hand. She then turned to face him.

"Chuck. I have no idea why you're sitting here trying to engage me in conversation when your behavior over the last forty-eight hours has been absolutely reprehensible. No. Scratch that. _Criminal_." Chuck hung his head. What he wanted to say was that _her_ behavior hadn't been so great either. He bit his tongue, however.

Chuck pursed his lips together and glanced over at Henry, who still seemed oblivious to his arrival.

"I understand. I thought...I thought I was protecting him," Chuck said sorrowfully, looking in Henry's direction. "But I was wrong...so wrong to take off with him like that, Blair. Believe me if I could take it back I would. I still don't know what I was thinking." He paused for a moment to get his thoughts together. "I guess watching you and..."

Chuck swallowed hard. He wasn't going to say his name. "It hurt. And then I had no idea where you were or when..._if_...you were even coming back. People were already talking, Blair. I didn't want him somehow finding out about...about you and _him_ through a third party."

Blair glanced over at Chuck, not sure whether she should believe him. Regardless of whether or not his motives were pure however, he did have a point. She had been living in the moment that night. She hadn't even considered how her impromptu PDA would affect her son.

Chuck registered every movement that her face was making-every crinkle in her nose, every twitch of her eyebrow. He knew her face well enough to know that what he was saying was definitely affecting her.

He continued to lay it on her, looking down at the ground regretfully. "That night...when your mother was talking about having you committed to a rehab facility, I just couldn't...I couldn't even-"

Blair looked at him in confusion. "What?"

Chuck allowed himself a small moment of victory as he revealed to her just what her mother had been planning for her after she fled with Humphrey.

Blair had no idea if he was lying or not, but it would be easy enough to find out from her mother once she got home. Surely he knew that.

"I understand now she was just concerned, Blair. As we all were. _Are…_" He took a deep breath and locked eyes with her. "No matter what happens, I just want you to be happy."

Blair studied him. He wasn't throwing insults at her or at Dan. He wasn't calling her a terrible mother or comparing her to a sweaty old horse. Chuck was actually being humble. She wasn't prepared for this and she honestly didn't know how much more she could hear.

"What I did yesterday was...it was disgusting," Chuck continued. "And I regret it. And I will continue to regret it every day for the rest of my life. If I could...if I could take it all back I would." If there was one thing Blair knew, it was that Chuck adored his son. He always wanted to be the father that Bart never was to him. Blair looked at him. Her eyes were now burning. This wasn't a conversation she wanted to be having anymore.

"You can stop now, Chuck. Honestly," she said softly, hoping he would get the hint.

"I know. But I have a few more things I need to confess to you, Blair." Blair began to fidget, annoyed as she took another sip of water. This was supposed to be a happy day with her child. They weren't supposed to be thinking about the events of yesterday. Chuck wasn't even supposed to be there.

"We were on the plane. He was crying for you. You were all he could talk about, Blair."

Blair couldn't take it anymore. She slammed the water bottle down. "WHY are you telling me this now, Chuck!?" she asked. Her voice was starting to break.

Chuck didn't hesitate. "Because, I want and need to come clean. For Henry's sake and for ours. No matter what happens between us, I want him to know that he's loved by both of us."

"You told him I left him!" she said angrily. She had no idea why he was continuing to push her. She had been close to forgiving him. Or at least understanding why he did what he did. Now she just wanted to slap him again.

"I made a mistake. I was angry with you. I'm still angry with you, Blair. But I'm trying to be honest with you. I can't let what you and Humphrey did-" Chuck silently cursed himself for saying his name. He just couldn't help himself.

"Do NOT blame me for what _you_ did, Chuck!" she said as she wiped a tear away. "I get that you're hurt. But you know what? You've hurt me every single day for the last five years. But I never thought about just disappearing with our son to punish you!" Blair stood up and took a couple of steps, just wanting to run away from him as fast as she could. She could feel her cheeks burning red as a pang of nausea kicked in, halting her in her tracks. She grabbed her stomach, willing it to cease.

"Just go away, Chuck. I can't do this right now." She choked back tears as she turned and walked back to the bench. She quickly started to grab her bags.

"Blair, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. That's not why I..." he pleaded. "Please don't…don't go."

"Henry!" Blair called out shakily. Henry turned around and jumped in excitement as he saw his father standing there. He ran over. Blair waved to him, trying her best to mask the fact that she was upset.

"Blair, you're right. I have no right to...please for Henry's sake can we just-" Blair said nothing.

She wiped another tear and quickly forced a smile as she watched him run straight into his father's arms. Blair couldn't help but note just how happy he was to see his father.

"Daddy! Did you see my T-rex!?"

"No, show me!" Chuck said enthusiastically. He quickly glimpsed at Blair who was now biting her fingernails. Henry started rifling through the shopping bags, scattering items all over the bench before finally landing upon the T-rex and handing it over to Chuck. Chuck took it in his hands, examining it closely.

"This is impressive!" Chuck said, ruffling Henry's hair.

"Hey, did you know the younger Tyrannosauruses had feathers for insulation? But they lost them as they got older." Henry shook his head no. Chuck then lifted him up in the air, eliciting a giggle. "What if _you_ had feathers?" Henry was overcome with laughter.

Blair watched them for a moment. It was a perfect father and son moment. And it was like she wasn't even there-that is until Henry tilted his head upside down in order to look at her.

"Mommy, I'm very hungry now." Blair nodded and smiled, grateful that her son had given them an out.

"Well, let's go eat!" Blair said, somehow managing to inflect enthusiasm into her words. "I'm sure Dorota has prepared something absolutely delicious."

"Can we get pizza?"

"I'm pretty sure Dorota has prepared something much better than pizza," Blair said as she started to throw the figurines and plush toys back into the bags.

"But I want pizza," Henry declared. Blair gritted her teeth. If she said no to pizza she would never hear the end of it. But Dorota was waiting.

"Blair, I'm sure what Dorota has cooked will be just as good tomorrow. How about I take you both to Serafina?" Chuck suggested. Blair bit her tongue but glared at him. She was officially being undermined.

"Yes Serafina!" Henry exclaimed.

"No, no." Blair shook her head at her son. "No. We cannot go to Serafina because Dorota is expecting us." She then turned to Chuck. "Maybe another night, Chuck."

Henry put his head down on Chuck's shoulder, disappointed and pouting. He placed his arms tightly around Chuck's neck while Blair started to collect their bags. Chuck kissed Henry on the head then set him down before beginning to assist her.

"Blair," Chuck whispered, nodding at a pouting Henry.

"He's just tired, Chuck. "We've had a full day."

"Come on," he prodded. "The child wants pizza. You wouldn't want to end your perfect mother-son day like this, would you?"

It pained her to say it, but he was right. She couldn't let the whole day get tainted over a simple thing like pizza. Blair looked over at her son, who was playing with the T-Rex a bit more aggressively than usual.

She rolled her eyes.

"Fine. I'll call Dorota." Chuck smiled as he grabbed the bags out of her hands.

"Henry. We're getting pizza!" a self-satisfied Chuck announced. Henry looked up in excitement before shouting out "Yes!" He ran up to his father and hugged him around the waist. "Limo's right up here," he said to Blair. Blair nodded and grabbed her purse, slowly following behind them.

A few yards away, two figures stood in the shadow of a Cypress tree. Georgina was clad in a trench coat and a pair of Armani sunglasses. She discreetly looked up over her newspaper as the family Bass paraded right before her. Beside her was a young boy wearing a cowboy hat and cowboy boots. He had a newspaper in his hands as well.

He looked up at her. "Crikey, mum. I could really go for a good snag and a Tim Tam about now."

Georgina glared at Milo, exasperated. "How many times do I have to tell you not to speak to me like that!?" She looked up and watched curiously as Chuck, Blair, and Henry loaded into the limo. Georgina looked down at her son.

"Forget the snags and the Tim Tams, Milo. We're back in New York now. And I'm craving a good slice."

* * *

Dan cautiously entered the loft. Rufus already told him he'd be out to dinner with "Panic," the group he produced for on occasion, but Dan didn't want to take any chances. He walked to the center of the living room and did a quick look around. When he was certain he was alone, he walked over to the kitchen island and lay his Barnes and Noble sack down. He then walked to the fridge to grab a beer.

His day had been a bit of a hodgepodge. What he should have been doing was prepping for his meeting with his agent and publisher that was scheduled for the following day.

His final deadline was fast approaching-the last few pages on his current book about the Roosevelts were due by the end of the month. Additionally, he was supposed to be coming up with a new book proposal, but he just couldn't focus. How could he be expected to concentrate on something so trivial at a time like this?

When he realized he wasn't going to get any additional writing done, he started calling divorce attorneys. He left nearly two dozen messages with attorneys from all around the five boroughs. No one had returned his calls. To most, this would have been cause for concern. However, this was Dan's first experience with contacting a divorce attorney.

Rather than wait around, he decided to make better use of his time. That's when he decided to venture out.

After sleeping on the conversation he had had with Blair the previous night, he woke up in the morning feeling a little better about it. He finally realized that she had things to take care of and that he couldn't take it personally. Blair's priority right now was, and needed to be, Henry.

Dan had things to focus on as well. He was going to be a father. And it was never too soon to start preparing.

He took a swig of his beer and pulled out his newly purchased books. He literally could have bought every book that Barnes and Noble offered on the subjects of pregnancy and fatherhood, but settled on the following: The Expectant Father, From Here to Paternity, Fatherhood: You Can't Do It Over, My Boys Can Swim! and Pregnancy: Day by Day. He also bought a pregnancy journal for Blair, just in case she wanted to do some introspection.

True, he could have downloaded some of these titles on his iPad, or just researched his questions on the internet. But he always preferred the feel of a book in his hands.

He opened up Pregnancy: Day by Day and flipped to day twenty-one. This was essentially where they were in the pregnancy, give or take a day. Dan began to read aloud.

"This week your soon-to-be-baby has started on its miraculous transformation from single cell to baby boy or girl." Dan gulped. "Baby boy or girl..." A stupid grin enveloped his face.

He next grabbed, and began to leaf through, The Expectant Father, stopping on a random page. He read the header aloud. "'Sex. Why You and Your Partner Might Be Feeling _Increased _Sexual Desire.'"

He swallowed hard. "Huh."

Dan was about to reach for another book when he was jarred by a knock on the door. He debated whether or not to answer it. The last thing he wanted to see was an axe wielding Chuck Bass at his door. He took a quick chug of beer and licked the excess liquid off of his lips before setting the bottle back down.

As quietly as he could, he began to place the books back in the sack.

"Dan?" It was the unmistakable voice of Nate Archibald. "Hey man, you in there?"

Dan paused for a moment. Did he want to talk to Nate?

"Uh...yeah. Just a…uh...just a sec," he answered back, looking for a place to quickly stow the books. He caught sight of the oven and quickly threw the books inside. He then hurried to the door, taking a moment to compose himself first before opening it.

"Hey! Nate. What's up?"

Nate smiled hesitantly. Dan seemed a bit out of breath. "Uh, this isn't a bad time is it?"

"Uh. Um. No," Dan lied. "This is a...this is a great time." Nate smiled warily.

Dan suddenly remembered that Nate had been absent from the dramatics yesterday and that this was the first time he'd seen him since he and Blair's relationship had been outed to the world.

"Sorry for just dropping by out of the blue, man," Nate began. "I can't seem to get ahold of anyone and I heard Blair was in the hospital yesterday. But I got no answer when I tried to call her cell or Chuck's. I swung by their house, Bass Industries. There's no sign of them. And Serena's not picking up either. Not that Blair would be with Serena."

Nate peeled off his coat and threw it on the sofa. _Great,_ Dan thought. Apparently he was last on Nate's buddy list.

"By the way, I went by your apartment...or, I guess I mean is it Serena's apartment now?" Nate laughed. "Sorry," Nate shrugged. "Anyway, Serena wasn't there, but there were some random people inside. With clipboards and cameras. I checked with Vanya and apparently Serena gave them permission to be there. But I sure hope you didn't leave anything of value there, because it looked like they were going through everything with a fine tooth comb."

Dan's stomach tightened as he realized what must have been happening. Serena and Lily were coming after him with guns blazing. Why was he even surprised?

Guess he would be stopping by later.

He cringed as he envisioned people in white coats and gloves sifting through and examining his things. At least he had his most important possession with him-his laptop. Everything else was pretty inconsequential. Still, it didn't mean he wanted strangers going through his underwear drawer.

"So anyway, how's Blair? You must know," Nate winked knowingly.

"She's uh...feeling better. Just got a little dehydrated. Probably food poisoning." Dan figured the less said to Nate the better. _For many reasons_...

Nate grinned at him.

"So you and Blair, huh? WOW. I gotta say. You really threw me with that one, Humphrey. Honestly, I never thought Blair would go there again with you. Ever." Dan tried his best not to take offense. He could see the wheels suddenly turning in Nate's head.

"Hey. You know what I just thought about? You're the new me. And this time Serena was the one who was cheated on instead of Blair." Nate laughed, shaking his head and recalling the times when he had been at the center of some classic Blair and Serena showdowns. Ivy League mixers. Masquerade balls. Bart Bass brunches.

_Good times_.

"Looks like you're left to carry the torch now, man. I mean you and Blair did have that practice round six years ago, but now...you just took it to a whole different level! The other night, things got_ real_."

There was a strong possibility that Nate had smoked a bowl before coming over.

Nate leaned in just a bit, as if telling Dan something in confidence. "I couldn't say this around Chuck and Serena but man...That kiss was HAWT! You've got Blair versus Serena 2.0 on your hands. Divorce edition. Congrats, man."

Dan wasn't really sure if "congrats" was the appropriate word. He looked at Nate, who seemed to have forgotten why he even stopped by in the first place.

"Uh, so you want a beer?" Dan offered. Dan wasn't really in the mood to shoot the shit, especially after hearing that there were people going through his things, but he didn't really want to alienate Nate either.

Nate nodded as Dan headed toward the fridge. "So you and Blair. You guys are... official?"

"I would say so," Dan nodded in confirmation.

"So have you uh...had any contact with Chuck since the whole...?" Nate asked, making a kiss face. Dan gave him a knowing look as he handed Nate his beer.

"Yeah, he was pretty furious," Nate said as he took a sip. His tone suddenly got serious. "You know, Chuck's my best friend, but you probably need to...prepare yourself," Nate warned. "He's not going to take this lying down."

As if Dan needed someone else warning him about Chuck Bass. Was anyone warning Chuck about _him_? After all, Chuck _had_ gotten to know his left fist again yesterday.

"I'm aware," Dan replied. He was suddenly flooded with memories of their little brawl at the hospital yesterday and how Chuck had essentially been responsible for getting him kicked out, as well as the impromptu excursion Chuck and Henry made over the Atlantic.

Dan wasn't necessarily up to discussing it right now, though.

"I remember the night Blair told Chuck she got engaged to Louis," Nate recalled. "He punched a window in his suite at the Empire. Shattered the glass. One of the shards cut Blair's face open."

Dan promptly set down his beer and raised his eyebrows in shock. "I'm sorry? He did WHAT!?" How could he have never heard about this?

Nate shrugged. "It was a long time ago. And I don't think he'd respond _that_ way anymore. Especially with Henry around." Dan swallowed hard. He'd had just about enough of Nate's propping of Chuck. How could Blair have never mentioned this to him? All he could think of now was that he needed to go and get Blair out of the Upper East Side ASAP because her welfare, and the welfare of his unborn child, were at risk as long as Chuck was in the vicinity.

But first, he needed to make a point to Nate about his so called "best friend."

"Nate, Chuck's behavior hasn't improved because he has a son. If anything it's worse. Because now he's using his son as a pawn!" Nate gave Dan a confused look.

Dan decided to enlighten him.

"He tried to kidnap Henry yesterday. Payback towards Blair for running off with me."

Nate looked at him in complete disbelief.

"The truth is Blair _was_ dehydrated yesterday, but the stress of thinking Chuck had taken her child is what put her in the hospital. He picked Henry up from Dorota's before dawn on New Year's morning and drove to the airport. They were halfway across the Atlantic before Chuck suddenly thought better of it. Or rather, thought better about possible jail time."

Nate shook his head. "Jesus. I don't know what to say...I guess..." He sighed. "I probably need to go talk to him." Dan cut his eyes. Even with all the disgusting things he knew about Chuck, and the bombshell Dan had just dropped, Nate was still showing loyalty to him.

Nate saw Dan shaking his head at him and had a moment of clarity, realizing that that probably wasn't what Dan was looking to hear right now. He quickly changed his tune. "Chuck's an ass," Nate stated lowly.

Dan gave a halfhearted smile. He would take it. And that seemed like an excellent place to wrap up the conversation.

"Well, uh, I think I probably need to head over to my apartment now. See what damage is being done." Nate nodded in agreement as he took another sip of beer. "Yeah. I gotta run, too. Dinner with the Captain." Nate got up from the stool. He walked over and grabbed his coat from off of the couch.

"So hey. You must be ecstatic!" Nate said. Dan suddenly gulped, looking at Nate in confusion. How could he possibly know?

"Jenny coming back to town?" It slowly started to sink in that he and Nate were talking about two completely different things.

And _wait_ _what?_

"Jenny? Is moving back to New York?"

"Yeah! Apparently Eleanor's giving her a promotion and she'll be overseeing Waldorf Designs in New York now that Blair's stepping down."

Another major piece of info he hadn't been privy to.

Dan was beyond confused and a little peeved that Nate somehow knew this information before he did.

"Jenny. Is taking over for _Blair_? When did this happen?"

"Oh. I talked to Jenny this morning. Sorry...I just assumed she'd already spoken to you or I wouldn't have...if she calls just pretend I didn't say anything. I'm sure she'll probably want to surprise you and Rufus."

It suddenly occurred to Dan that Jenny must have told Nate about Blair.

"Well, uh, I should probably get going." Dan watched as Nate turned and opened the door, and then quickly turned back as if he forgot something.

"Hey. Are you teaching swimming lessons or something?" Dan cocked his head in confusion. Nate then gestured to the kitchen island. "I noticed you're reading My Boys Can Swim." Dan slowly turned around in horror and noticed the one book he had failed to get rid of.

_Shiiiiiiiit. _

He slowly shut his eyes. He then remembered that rule number one of improvisation is "always say yes."

Dan opened his eyes. "Yes! Actually I am...I mean I _will_ be teaching!" Dan said, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. "This guy I know at the Y asked if I could help out next summer. Not a big deal."

Nate seemed impressed.

"Well, let me know if you need any help, man. I'm a pretty good swimmer if I do say so myself. Spent lots of summers racing Tripp in Grandfather's pool." Nate paused for a moment to reflect. "Looking back on it, I probably should have let him win more. Maybe he wouldn't have tried to kill me," Nate chuckled.

Dan gave a sympathetic look as Nate slipped his coat on.

"Oh. Hey, are you still good on the uh-" He gestured, bringing his thumb and index finger to his lips.

"Yep. All good. Good to go," Dan confirmed, giving Nate the thumbs up sign and wishing he would just leave already. Truthfully, Dan didn't know where the stash had disappeared to. Rufus had been enjoying it earlier in the day, though. He had probably taken it with him to his "Panic" dinner.

"Hey. Maybe we can grab dinner this week?" Nate suggested. Dan nodded. Nate smiled before _finally_ walking out the door.

Dan waited for a minute to make sure Nate somehow wasn't going to come back before scrambling to the kitchen to grab the book from off the counter and the other books he had shoved into the oven. He quickly ran to his room and shoved them under the bed.

A minute later, he grabbed his coat and was out of the door.

* * *

"Serena, I can assure you that you will receive everything you're entitled to and more. That's my job." Patrick van Heusen was Lily's new favorite New York City divorce attorney. The three of them were dining at Arlington Club to discuss Serena's divorce.

It appeared that Serena was still in need of some prodding to go along with the tactics her mother and Patrick wanted to use. Rather, she didn't appreciate that her apartment was currently being ransacked by a couple of strangers.

"And is that why you currently have investigators searching through every crevice of my apartment right now?" An annoyed Serena took a sip of her Cosmo.

Patrick leaned over the table and focused in on Serena. He picked up his cell phone. "Say the word and they're gone. I'll make the call. If you're not comfortable with it, I'm not comfortable with it. But if they leave, you could potentially be missing out on that one crucial piece of evidence that sways a judge one way or the other," he zealously explained. "We're now in possession of photographs and a ten second video of your husband and Mrs. Bass that we've acquired from some of the Waldorf party guests. And that's certainly a good start. But if we can show this has been an ongoing relationship we stand to gain even more as far as a settlement goes. And there's no doubt in my mind there are bits and pieces to be unearthed in that apartment. I'm simply looking out for your interests here Serena." Serena rolled her eyes and took another sip of her Cosmo.

She honestly didn't know what she should be thinking or feeling, but she knew a scum sucking lawyer when she saw one. The truth was that she was still processing it all. The fact that she was sitting here with a divorce attorney at all was surreal.

Her talk with Dan during the dinner that wasn't on New Year's night made her feel like utter shit. That's when she found out Dan had already known about her and Nate. And it wasn't the fact that he already knew that was getting to her. It was that he didn't even care. He wasn't jealous. He wasn't even angry.

And if that didn't make her feel bad enough, just a few hours later she had to endure watching him kiss Blair at the stroke of midnight. The way he was kissing her and touching her, and holding her tightly up against him...he had never kissed or touched or held her like that. He had never written pornographic poetry about her, either.

And it killed her.

Serena took an aggressive sip of her Cosmo, trying to wash the memory away.

"Serena," Lily urged. "Dan humiliated you in the most public way he possibly could. With your best friend. Not only was it disrespectful, it was incredibly cruel."

"Yeah, well. Blair hasn't been my best friend in a while."

"Not the point, Serena. Everyone in that room watched Dan making a mockery of your wedding vows. You deserve whatever you can get from Dan. If he ends up destitute living with the hobos in Grand Central it will be too good for him." Lily pressed firmly.

Serena rested her forehead on her hand and thought about it for a moment. Maybe her mother was right. She definitely didn't care to endure the whispers and empathetic glances she was inevitably bound to receive. She didn't want people feeling sorry for her. The only way to remedy the situation would be to take control of it. That meant going on the offensive. This was how it had to be.

Serena was now thinking about how she could maybe turn this enormous lump of coal into a diamond. Maybe after taking Dan to the cleaners, she herself could get back to writing-she could blog about cheating husbands and become a role model for millions of women everywhere. There were countless possibilities if she played her cards right.

She looked up as the server arrived with their entrees.

Serena immediately picked up her fork and began to stab at her Branzino.

"Serena?" Patrick continued. "It's your call. What's your answer?" Serena looked up and took a deep breath.

"Keep the investigators," she said firmly.

"That a girl." Patrick beamed. "Now," Patrick said between bites of his Ribeye. "You probably already know this, but try and steer clear of your husband. You don't want to say or do anything he might be able to use to his advantage. Same with Blair Bass. We don't want to give them any ammunition."

"Now," Patrick continued. "Once the investigators get a report together, hopefully we'll have a sound date on just how long this relationship was going on and how much Dan spent to maintain it." He looked over at Lily. "I'd also like to get a statement from Charles Bass, just to cover all of our bases."

"I'm sure Charles will cooperate," Lily nodded as she picked up her fork. "Patrick, I'm curious about what exactly Serena's entitled to as far as future earnings from Dan's book sales. Her priority during their entire marriage was keeping him happy and comfortable while he spent his time writing. I think it's only fair that she be allowed to collect on the projects he published while they were married as well as the ones he's about to start. _And_ those he completed before they were married of course. Dan based characters on her in two of his books, one of which was made into a movie. And he wrote countless stories and articles about her. Often saying some very disparaging things."

_He had also written some beautiful things about her and a scathing article on Blair. Guess those articles ultimately meant nothing_, Serena thought to herself.

She listened intently as her mother continued to run the show. This was her area of expertise after all. Serena finished her drink off, motioning to the waitress to bring her another.

"I'm just saying that he's made a lot of money off of Serena and her image. And she's turned down opportunities of her own to support him in his craft," Lily continued.

"Absolutely," Patrick agreed. "That's very common in marriages. The women have sacrificed everything for the sake of their husbands. I'm going to get an estimate together on just how much Dan Humphrey is worth presently, what his books stand to make. We'll present that information and I'm sure any judge worth his salt will take that into consideration and proceed with giving us the maximum maintenance award." Patrick turned to Serena.

"Serena. No one comes out of a divorce completely unscathed. But I assure you, after some time has passed, you will be able to take comfort in the fact that Dan is going to pay for the way he's treated you." He assured.

"Sounds good to me," Serena said, taking a bite of her fish. After a couple of Cosmos, she was feeling no pain. She had come to the decision that Dan Humphrey deserved whatever Patrick could throw at him.

And if Blair happened to get hit in the crossfire, even better...

"Now, Serena. I already know the answer to this, but I just need to confirm. If an opposing investigator were to go..._digging_, I want to make sure he wouldn't...find anything."

An offended Lily cocked her head to the side. "Patrick, what exactly are you insinuating? That my daughter broke her marriage vows?" Serena suddenly went to work on her fresh Cosmo.

"No. Absolutely not, Lily," he assured her. "But you would be surprised how many people I've represented who accuse his or her spouse of adultery when-" Serena suddenly began to choke as her drink went down the wrong pipe. She reached for her water.

"Serena? Are you okay?" a concerned Lily asked. Serena nodded as she took another sip of water and coughed into her napkin.

Lily turned her attention back to Patrick. "I assure you. My daughter has been nothing but a loyal and devoted wife. She has absolutely nothing to hide."

Patrick nodded as he took a bite of his steak. He then watched curiously as Serena stared down at her plate.

* * *

"Blair? Is that you?" Eleanor called out from the living room. She stood up and placed her newspaper down, making her way to the foyer. "Dorota just left. She told me you called her earlier and that you were taking Henry-"

Eleanor suddenly stopped in her tracks, surprised by the sight of Blair standing beside Chuck. He was holding a sleeping Henry and a couple of shopping bags. Blair held another one, looking absolutely exhausted.

"Blair," she said as she glared accusingly at Chuck. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, Mother. I'm fine."

"Um. I'm just going to go put him upstairs," Chuck said, realizing Eleanor was still glaring at him.

Eleanor and Blair watched as Chuck carefully walked up the stairs with his son and the shopping bags. A perturbed Eleanor waited until he was out of earshot before turning to her daughter.

"Blair! What is going on? Why are you with Chuck!?" Eleanor whispered aggressively.

Blair shrugged. "We were at the park, and he just showed up."

Eleanor shook her head. "Of course he did. Did you tell him to leave!?"

"Henry was happy to see him, Mother. What exactly was I supposed to do?" Blair heaved a sigh as she turned to walk into the living room. Eleanor followed right on her heels.

"How about telling him to stay away from you and that your attorney will be_ in touch_, Blair!"

"Aren't you being a bit dramatic?"

"Blair, darling, he took your _child_!" Eleanor emphasized with a brazened scoff.

"I know. But...We talked this afternoon. Chuck's truly sorry. And I just don't think this has to be an ugly divorce like it was with Louis. He knows that he made a mistake. And…Henry loves him," she said as she collapsed onto the chaise lounge. "So for his sake-"

"Blair," Eleanor said, getting increasingly agitated. "I wouldn't say he just 'made a mistake.'"

"I am handling it, Mother."

"That is _not _what it looks like, Blair!" Blair leaned her head back on the chaise and closed her eyes, trying to drown out the nagging sound of her mother's voice.

"Did you even eat today? You look completely washed out."

"Thanks," she said sarcastically. "As a matter of fact I just stuffed my face with pizza. Terrible pizza. But still..."

"Somehow I don't believe you, Blair." Blair sighed. It really was time for Eleanor to go back to Paris. Eleanor walked to stand over her daughter, her arms folded.

"Blair. You are telling me that you can handle things, but your actions are saying something completely different. If you don't start taking care of yourself-"

"You're going to stick me in a rehab facility?" Blair asked, finishing her mother's sentence. Eleanor's eyes narrowed. _Chuck..._

Blair opened her eyes and looked at her mother. "Chuck told me."

"Of course he did. But that was obviously before I knew-" Eleanor began to argue, removing her glasses and flailing her arms in the air, "...about...all of this! Your very odd behavior makes sense now!"

Blair sat up. "Mother. Chuck and I still have things to discuss. He knows that. And we will discuss them. But today was about our child. If you and Daddy can get along, I don't know why Chuck and I-"

"I'm very sorry to interrupt." Eleanor and Blair looked up simultaneously to see Chuck. "Henry's all tucked in. Snoozing away. And I placed the bags in your room." Eleanor refrained from saying anything, choosing to look away while Blair nodded.

"Thank you," Blair said politely as she stood up.

"I will call you. About lunch tomorrow," Chuck added. Blair nodded again.

"Have a good evening, ladies." Chuck turned and headed for the elevator. Eleanor waited for the sound of the doors to close before she turned back to her daughter.

"Blair, what does he mean _lunch_?" Eleanor couldn't understand why her daughter wasn't livid with him.

"Mother, I'm done with this conversation. I'm going to take a long soak in the tub and then I'm going to bed."

"So you don't even want to hear if Jenny took the job?" Eleanor scoffed.

"She did. I'm certain of it." Jenny was still Blair's protégée. She would jump on any chance to follow in her footsteps. Blair made her way to the staircase as Eleanor called out to her.

"Dorota made chicken soup out of the leftover broth. I'll bring some up for you later."

"I told you that I just ate!" Blair shouted back.

"But you're eating for two..." Eleanor sighed.

Blair made her way up to the top of the stairs. Henry was sound asleep in what used to be Serena's room. She walked through the shared bathroom and poked her head inside. He was completely tucked in with just a tiny brown head poking out from the covers. She quietly shut the door and locked it, then began to draw her bath. She walked back inside her room and grabbed her phone from her purse, turning it on for the first time all day.

Blair huffed in annoyance. She had no missed calls or texts from Dan.

* * *

Vanya had already left, but Dan had still gotten the side eye from the night door man on his way up to his apartment. Amazingly, though, he hadn't met any resistance from him.

He nervously walked into the apartment. There were stacks of books everywhere, as well as papers, files...

Dan watched as a tall woman in her forties with glasses and a jet black ponytail sifted through a pile of his books. She hadn't seemed to notice him when he walked in, or if she had, she didn't seem to care. She opened one book, turning it upside down to see if anything fell out. When she was sure there was nothing stuck between the pages, she went on to the next one.

"Uh...I'm sorry," Dan said, getting increasingly irritated. "What exactly are you doing?" The truth was Dan knew exactly what she was doing. He just couldn't believe Serena had actually gone the dirty route. Of course her mother was a divorce champion. But Lily hadn't pulled this shit on Rufus when they got divorced.

Dan thought questioning the woman would jolt her a little, but she didn't even seem fazed. "I'm sure your wife can explain," she replied happily. She then had the audacity to wink at Dan before going back to what she was doing.

"I bet she fucking can_..."_ Dan mumbled as he walked into his bedroom. Standing in his closet was a younger looking man with a buzz cut. He was pulling Dan's clothes off of hangers, smelling them, checking pockets, and on occasion taking pictures of them. When he was finished with a garment he placed it into one of three different piles on the floor.

"What the hell are you doing? Hey, get away from my clothes!"

"Well since I bought most of them, technically they're probably mine." Dan turned around. Serena stood in the doorway smirking, arms folded.

"What exactly is going on here? What's the point of having these people in here? It's an invasion of privacy," Dan questioned bitingly.

"What do you think is going on, Dan? You decided to humiliate me in front of the entire island of Manhattan. And now you're going to pay for it. And these people? They work for my attorney, Patrick van Heusen. You may have heard of him. He represented Blaine Trump and Tory Burch in their divorces."

Dan gulped. And for the first time since he'd left Serena he was actually feeling a bit...worried. Serena observed him, an amused look on her face.

"What is it Dan? Scared?" Serena raised her eyebrows in feigned concern.

"Serena. It doesn't have to be like this. You know that. You don't have to take Lily's advice on everything."

Dan suddenly felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out and saw a text from Blair.

"_Where are you_?" He sighed and quickly put the phone back into his pocket.

"Who says I'm taking my mother's advice on anything? This is _my_ decision. The way you've treated me the past year, let's face it-the past _few_ years...let's just say you've been incredibly cruel. The things you've written about me over the years-"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Gossip Girl, Dan. I'm talking about _Gossip Girl_." They were interrupted by the sound of Dan's phone ringing. Dan pulled it out again. _Blair_. Dan huffed and quickly silenced it.

"Serena. That was ages ago and that wasn't me talking, anyway. Those were anonymous tips that people sent in! Tips that were true!"

"Not all of them." Serena's eyes narrowed.

"Well, you must not have been that upset about it because you ended up marrying me!" Dan stated pointedly.

"You emotionally manipulated me," Serena added with a hint of ire and contempt.

"I WHAT?!" Dan gritted his teeth. He suddenly remembered they weren't alone and turned around to see the man with the buzz cut staring at him as he pulled some receipts out of Dan's jeans. Dan clenched his fists.

"I'm sorry, Dan. But you screwed with the wrong girl. And you're about to find out why." Dan felt his phone vibrate again and once again huffed in annoyance. He looked at it-another text from Blair.

"_IGNORING THE MOTHER OF YOUR CHILD IS NOT A WISE DECISION HUMPHREY!"_

Dan massaged his neck for a moment.

"What?" Serena smirked. "Awww, is Blair summoning you?" she asked condescendingly. "You're so pathetic, you know that? She has you completely _whipped_."

Dan smirked. "Yes. Happily."

Serena scowled as Dan started to walk in the direction of the door.

"Oh. And this, whatever this is, is fine...just fine," he said as he gestured to the investigator who was now smelling one of Dan's dress jackets. "Have them go through everything. You know what, have them go through it _twice._ I don't give a fuck. But just remember you're not completely innocent here. Nate and I are having dinner later this week. And there are a few things we'll be discussing."

With that, Dan walked out the door. "Oh by the way," he yelled behind him on the way out. "When these people are done here, just donate all of the clothes to Goodwill, because I definitely don't want any more reminders of you."

Serena ran into the hallway and watched as Dan made his way to the elevator. "You're an idiot! She'll never leave Chuck! You know that, Dan!" Serena screamed after him. At the sound of the elevator doors closing, she grabbed her phone, a determined look in her eye. She scrolled down to Nate's name and dialed.

"And I'll be having dinner with Nate _first_."

* * *

Chuck flipped on the light and looked around his office at Bass Industries. It was late, but he was still up for a little celebration. Just twenty-four hours after being numero uno on Blair's most hated list, he had somehow managed to turn it around and have a decent conversation with her _and_ gotten her to dine with him.

Back at the park, he had even brought her to tears with his heartfelt confession and apology. And after eavesdropping on Blair and Eleanor's conversation over at the penthouse, he realized things had gone even better than he originally thought.

Chuck walked over to his desk and had a seat. He opened a side drawer and took out a bottle of Scotch. He took a swig straight from the bottle.

Chuck spun around in his chair, viewing the Manhattan skyline. "Not bad, Bass." It would only be a matter of time before she was dumping Humphrey Dumpty and coming back to where she belonged. This would all be _after_ she begged him to take her back. And of course he would take her back-but there would have to be some _punishment_ involved. Chuck smirked as he began to mentally compile a list of "items" to pick up at The Pleasure Chest and lingerie to acquire from Kiki de Montparnasse.

Chuck raised the bottle in the air, toasting himself to a job well done.

"To Blair and her Brooklynite!" a smarmy voice exclaimed from the doorway.

Chuck jumped in surprise and peered at the door.

"Jack?"

"I prefer 'Uncle Jack.'" Chuck sank back into his chair. He wasn't exactly in the mood for surprises. Good or bad. And this was definitely on the bad spectrum of things. "What are you doing here?" Chuck grudgingly asked.

"Thanks for the warm welcome. But can a man not come and check on his favorite nephew from time to time?"

"I'm your only nephew. And I know you, Jack. That's not why you're here."

"Aaaaand you're right," he said sarcastically. "You see, I got a very interesting email from Rich Haley."

Chuck shook his head and shrugged. "Yes, and your point?"

"He's pulling out of Hong Kong. The site's gone now. Sold. ZAI ZIAN!" Chuck looked at him in confusion.

"What do you mean he's pulling out of Hong Kong!?" Chuck furrowed his brow in bewilderment.

Jack wagged his finger at him. "It appears to me that someone hasn't been taking care of business..." He rubbed his chin for a moment. "Oh yeah," Jack deadpanned. "That someone would be YOU. Nice shiner, by the way," he winked.

"Jack I-"

"I told you that I didn't mind living abroad as long as you had things on lockdown _here_. We just lost millions of dollars in revenue, Chuck. That hotel would have been in a prime location right on Victoria Harbor."

Chuck's head was spinning, trying to reconcile the information he had just received. "I don't understand. I just talked to Rich last week. He was all on board. What the hell changed? And why didn't he tell _me_? Why is he emailing you?" Chuck's fingers clenched his glass of Scotch unconsciously.

Jack bowed his head. "Oh Chuck. There's still so much to learn." Jack pulled a copy of the New York Post out of his back pocket and slammed it onto Chuck's desk.

"Your wife and her _lover_ are smeared all over Page FUCKING Six."

Chuck zoomed in on the write-up. He'd heard there was a mention about it the New Year's party, but so what? It was just a gossip column. Chuck shrugged. "What the hell does that have to do with the Hong Kong deal?"

Jack laughed at his poor, deluded nephew.

"Because it shows a loss of _control_. It shows you can't control your own wife. That you have no _staying_ power. And it shows that you can't take care of _business_," he said as he made a vulgar gesture. Jack sat down on the desk.

"You wanna know what the worst part of all this is?" Jack sneered. Chuck stayed silent. "The dude she's screwing around on you with is a _sensitive type_. A _writer _who, at one point, masqueraded as an anonymous, catty, femme fatale blogger with eternal PMS. I mean, if she was gonna cheat on ya it could have at least been with Derek Jeter. Or Topper Mortimer." He leaned his head down, so he could look Chuck straight in the eye. He smiled. "Or _me_."

Chuck was seething at Jack's last comment, gripping the armrests of his chair.

"I mean, who the hell is Dan Humphrey anyway? Did I go to his wedding? Did he marry 'The Serena?'" Jack laughed. "He's sacked Blair and Serena? What the hell does that say? Guy must be hung like a bull." Jack raised his eyebrows as he hopped off the desk and grabbed the bottle of Scotch. "And was he the guy that published that vomit inducing homage to you in Vanity Fair several years ago?"

Jack began to laugh uncontrollably. "And now...now he's fucking your wife? That is just rich."

Chuck was stone faced as Jack continued to shame him.

"What are you going to do about this Chuck?" Jack asked, suddenly serious.

"It's not your problem Jack," Chuck shot back.

"See that's where you're wrong," Jack said as he placed the bottle back down on the desk. "I was planning to retire in two years. But now, thanks to your inability to manage things here, it looks like I'm in it for the long haul."

"Blair and I talked today," Chuck said quietly. "We're having lunch tomorrow and-"

"Wah! Wah! Wah! Blair this, Blair that. The question is, why haven't you _done_ something about the douchebag who's banging your wife? You're sitting here on your ass celebrating the fact that you get to 'do lunch' with the missus tomorrow and she's probably on her knees blowing him right now!" Jack sneered.

Chuck cut his eyes.

"You're lucky, though. Because you have Uncle Jack here to guide you now. Hope is not lost." Jack took another drink from the bottle. "Since my arrival several short hours ago, I have discovered some interesting things. Did you know that not one divorce attorney in this town will return Dan Humphrey's calls? And you wanna know why? Because Lily hired _Patrick van Heusen_. Why haven't you hired him yet?"

"Because I'm not getting a divorce," Chuck screamed, pounding his fist on the desk. Jack snorted.

"And what are you doing to make sure that doesn't happen, Chuck? You think you can just sit around and wait for Blair to come to her senses? Fuck that. You need to show her you mean business. By showing _him_ who he's fucking with. Did you know he has a meeting scheduled with his book agent and publisher tomorrow?"

Chuck shook his head. "See Chuck? I haven't even been here five hours and I've already put more work into trying to save your marriage than you have!"

Jack eyed Chuck for a moment. He was now looking out the window.

"When's the last time you got laid, Chuck?" Chuck turned and glared but said nothing.

"That's what I thought. No wonder you're not thinking rationally. Time to get your fucking balls back!" Jack turned toward the door. "HEIDI! SHANNON!"

Seconds after being summoned, two call girls, one red head and one blonde made their way into his office.

"Sorry. Brunettes were all booked," Jack winked.

"You girls know what to do. I'll be back in an hour." Chuck cautiously stood up from his desk as the red head started to remove Chuck's coat and tie. The blonde got down on her knees and went to work on unzipping his pants.

"Oh. I'll be taking this with me," Jack said, grabbing the bottle of Scotch. He walked out the door, slamming it behind him.

Chuck closed his eyes and sank into his chair.

Jack pulled out his phone and dialed. "Yeah. Rich. Have you figured out where you want to meet?" Georgina watched from around the corner as her husband stepped on the elevator and disappeared from view.

"Really Jack? Heidi and Shannon again?" She was startled by the sound of her phone ringing. She looked at the caller ID, rolling her eyes as she quickly answered it. "What, Phillip? No, they're like cookies! Two layers of a chocolate malted biscuit separated by a light chocolate cream filling and coated in a thin layer of chocolate! I don't have time for this right now. Tell Milo to eat an Oreo!"

She sighed as she hung up and began to scroll through pictures on her phone. Amongst them were pictures of Chuck, Blair, and Henry dining together like a happy family at Serafina. Another was a picture of Heidi and Shannon. They had actually posed for her minutes earlier in front of Chuck's office door and were going to text her some additional photos later if all went according to plan.

Georgina smiled. "Now. On to my next stop."

* * *

Eleanor was about to carry a tray of chicken soup, a dinner roll, and a glass of orange juice up to Blair's room when she heard the elevator doors open. She lay the tray down on the entry way table and looked up to see Dan stepping off.

"Of course," Eleanor groaned. She feigned a smile. "I am assuming Blair rang you up."

"Uh yeah. Yes. I'm sorry to drop in on you so late, Mrs. Rose." Dan wasn't sure how to proceed with her after their intense, albeit brief conversation yesterday. Eleanor sighed.

"Well. Since you're here now, I will leave it to you to carry this tray up to her. I don't think she's had much to eat today."

"Okay," Dan nodded. He was just happy Eleanor wasn't throwing him out.

"Okay," Eleanor echoed him. She then cleared her throat. "Well, I'm off to the atelier, then. I have some things to get in order."

Dan was surprised. "Really? This late?"

Eleanor rolled her eyes. It was obvious Dan knew nothing about running a fashion house. "Have you spoken with your sister recently?"

"Um. Not since yesterday morning, but I heard she's-"

Eleanor nodded. "Yes, well. I just hope she can handle the tumultuous job duties," Eleanor said with a huff. "Blair says she can, so-"

Dan was pleased to hear that Blair had given Jenny her seal of approval.

"Well, anyway. I really must go." Eleanor grabbed her coat and started toward the elevator

"Daniel?" she called out as she waited. Dan turned around.

"Yes?"

"I'm...leaving for Paris tomorrow." Dan was shocked by this information considering only twenty-four hours earlier she'd been acting as Blair's chief protector.

Dan could see she was getting emotional.

"And I am entrusting you," she said, her lip trembling, "to look after her."

No matter how he had felt about the woman yesterday, Eleanor

was only coming from a place of pure concern for Blair.

"Absolutely."

"Can you please tell Blair where I am?"

Dan nodded emphatically as he watched Eleanor step onto the elevator. When the doors closed he turned around and grabbed the tray, making his way up to Blair's room.

He approached Blair's door and knocked twice. "Room service," he said in a posh British accent. A second later the door swung open. Blair stood before him in a robe, her hand on one hip. She looked at the tray and scowled.

"Looks like someone's in a pleasant mood," Dan deadpanned as he walked past her with the tray. "Your mother told me to let you know she's going to the atelier. I guess she's got to get some things in order." Dan set the tray down on the bed. "By the way, thanks for telling me you're stepping down from Waldorf and that Jenny's taking over for you," he added with heavy sarcasm.

"Well how could I _tell _you about anything when you haven't even called me in the past twenty-four hours?" Blair huffed. Dan looked at her. She was apparently suffering from amnesia.

"Blair. You said-" He paused abruptly as he took her in with his eyes. Her arms were crossed and her head was cocked to one side. At that moment Dan decided that he wasn't going to argue with her.

"I'm sorry. I should have called you. Forgive me?" A tiny grin popped up on Blair's face as Dan approached her. He took her hands and placed a quick peck on her cheek.

"So, are you sure about this? I mean is Jenny really up to running Waldorf Designs?"

"She's merely keeping my seat warm. Seeing that I'm going to be tied up with.._.things_ for the foreseeable future, we thought this was the proper thing to do. She shouldn't get too comfortable," Blair smirked. "Besides. I'm going to keep my eye on her."

Dan smiled. Of course she would.

"How was your day with Henry?" Dan let go of her hands. Blair walked over and picked up the dinner roll Eleanor had sent up with the soup and began to nibble on it.

"I think we bought everything dinosaur related that the museum of Natural History had in stock. Lots of walking. I wouldn't be surprised if he sleeps all day tomorrow."

"So it was drama free then?" Dan asked pointedly, alluding to Chuck. He was still thinking about what Nate had told him earlier about him punching a window and cutting Blair's face. He wanted to discuss it with her at some point, but tonight probably wasn't the right time.

"Yep," Blair answered a little too quickly. Dan observed her for a moment as she continued to eat the roll. Her hair was pulled up and her cheeks were still rosy from the heat of the bath. She was obviously fatigued but apparently feeling well enough to send him rude text messages and give him a hard time.

"So, anything interesting happen with you today?" Blair asked as she took a sip of orange juice.

"Well. As a matter of fact I just came from seeing Serena." Blair made a face and set her glass down.

"Serena? Why?"

"Because her attorney had his investigators digging through all of my things. All of my books. My clothes." Blair pondered this for a moment and took a spoonful of soup.

"It was humiliating, Blair. This random guy was going through all of the pockets in my clothing. And this woman was going through all of my books. And Serena was just standing there smirking. I told her to just donate the clothes and that I didn't want any reminders of her anyway."

"It's probably time for you to have a new wardrobe anyway. I can help you with that," Blair smiled. "And it's also probably time I paid Serena a visit..."

"Blair, no. Please don't go stirring up anything with Serena."

"Sounds like she's the one stirring things up! I'm just going to have to tell her-"

"Blair. Serena is not in a good place right now. She probably just needs some time to cool off and she'll realize that the tactics she and her attorney are using are just a little over the top. Promise me you'll stay away from her." Blair scrunched her face for a moment. She just couldn't make that promise.

"Fine," she lied. "So who's her attorney anyway?"

"I don't know...some guy name Patrick van-"

"Heusen?" Blair dropped her soup spoon and raised her eyebrows. "She got Patrick van Heusen?"

Dan nodded and watched as Blair bit her lip in concern. "Hmm. Well. He's kind of a big deal, I guess. But don't worry. I'm sure you can find someone equally impressive." Dan supposed so, but he was becoming increasingly concerned that he hadn't heard anything back from any of the attorneys he'd contacted this morning.

Dan sat down next to her on the bed. "So um. How are you feeling today? Have you...been eating?"

"I'm trying, Dan," she said defensively. She took another spoonful of soup then pushed the tray away. "There," she sighed as she lay her head down on the pillow. He watched her for a moment as she grabbed his fingers and began to play with them. She closed her eyes and sighed. When her fingers went still, he knew it was probably time to go.

"Blair," he whispered. "I'm gonna let you sleep. I'll call you in the morning." He leaned over and placed a kiss on her forehead. Her eyes immediately popped open.

"What?!" She was suddenly wide awake. "You're leaving?"

"Yeah, you're obviously tired."

"No. No. No. No. You can't leave," she whined.

"Blair-"

"Don't you want to have a sleepover with me?" she asked her liquid brown eyes pleading with him.

"What about Henry?"

"I told you he's asleep. And he's not waking up anytime soon."

She took Dan's hand and slipped it onto her leg. Dan's breath caught for a moment when he realized she didn't just want to have a sleepover. She wanted to have a _sleepover_. She began to untie her robe as Dan yanked his hand away.

"Blair. I don't think I can..." he said, swallowing hard. "I mean you're preg-" He licked his lips. "What if Eleanor comes back? Maybe she forgot something. And Henry is right in that bedroom..."

Blair frowned. "Relax. Mother's not coming back. I told you Henry's sound asleep. And I hate to break it to you but pregnant women have sex. Lots of it." Dan suddenly remembered the book he had been reading earlier.

_Sex. Why You and Your Partner Might Be Feeling Increased Sexual Desire_

"I am...aware." Dan swallowed.

"So then what is your problem?"

"My problem? I...I don't...no problem." Dan thought back to the other book he'd started reading earlier.

_This week your soon-to-be-baby has started on its miraculous transformation from single cell to baby boy or girl._

Blair rolled her eyes, as if reading his thoughts. "You got books, didn't you?"

Dan's silence said it all.

"Forget what you've read. I'm not letting you off the hook, Humphrey." Blair bit her lip and assertively pulled Dan's face to her. She placed her lips on his, parting them slightly, her tongue aggressively clashing against his.

"Blair," he panted, finding that his concerns were quickly fading away. Especially when she did that thing with her tongue. She looked at him, eyes raised.

"Well?" she asked.

"Yeah," he exhaled. "More..." She nodded with approval as she worked to remove his coat and tossed it to the side.

"Up here," she commanded, patting the pillows and directing Dan to scoot back against them. Dan slid off his shoes and did what he was told. He watched as she hopped off the bed and placed the tray of soup over on the nightstand. She hit the light switch and moved back on the bed. He bit his lip in anticipation.

As she began to straddle him and unzip his pants, he closed his eyes and rested his arms above his head. He couldn't believe how horny she was so quickly after being incapacitated. He could feel her sliding his pants down and tossing them away on the floor. She began to slowly stroke him through his boxers.

"Come on Humphrey. Don't be shy..." she implored him. She then worked to unbutton his shirt as she began to move on top of him. "Button number one..."

For every button she released she left a kiss in its place. "Button number two..." _Kiss_. "Button number three..." This time she threw in some tongue and he moaned in appreciation. "Yeah...that's my good man..." she whispered in his ear. When every button was freed, she continued to kiss down his body, running her nails over his chest and down his abs. He was getting painfully hard and was full on panting as he opened his eyes and watched her hop off of him. She pulled a clip out of her hair, letting it fall down onto her shoulders. She licked her lips and slowly worked to pull his boxers down, a dangerous smile on her face.

Dan took a deep breath as her lips finally made contact with his cock. Her hair was everywhere, tickling his abs and chest, and he moved his hands so he could run his fingers through it, massaging her head in the process. She gave a little sigh of approval.

Blair began to lightly suck on his tip, licking it, and then sucking it again. His breathing was deep and labored as she then began to lick up his shaft. "Oh yeah..." he groaned in appreciation. She came back down again and began to take his cock in her mouth. She took him in half way, making eye contact with him, wanting to make sure he could see everything she was doing. Blair took him in a little more, her eyes still frozen on his. Slower. Deeper. Little by little. Still taking more of him into her mouth.

Dan couldn't take it anymore. "Blair-" She understood, smirking as he pulled her off of him. Together they went to work on getting the rest of her robe off.

He had just begun to pull it down off of her shoulders when Dan caught sight of the door knob slowly turning.

He suddenly froze.

"Blair."

* * *

AN: Thanks to Vampslaying101 for once again helping me with this chapter and thanks to everyone for following and reading. I'm not sure how I reached the 100,000 word mark but this story truly seems to have taken on a life of its own now. I'd love to hear your thoughts, speculation, gripes, whatever... I read all of the feedback and it truly does help guide me plan for future chapters.

XOXO

Erin


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

"Humphrey..." Blair moaned as she began to nibble on Dan's neck. She then ran her fingers through his dark, curly locks.

"Blair," Dan gulped, trying once again to get her attention. Stop. Stop. You have to stop!"

Blair pulled back, agitated. "For God's sake! What is it now Humphrey?!"

Dan nodded to the bedroom door. "Your doorknob..." he whispered, out of breath, "...is moving." Blair slowly turned around to notice that the doorknob was in fact turning. Horrified, she quickly turned back to face Dan, "Fuck. Henry."

Blair frantically threw her robe back on and launched herself off the bed. Meanwhile, Dan-and his blue balls-quickly began to pick up his clothes and shoes up from off of the floor.

"Mommy!" an agitated little voice yelled out from the other side of the door. "Why is the door locked? I have to go to the bathroom! Why is this locked, too?" Blair suddenly remembered, thankfully, that she had locked the door from the bathroom side when she had taken a bath earlier.

"Umm, okay...okay. Just um...hang on. I'll unlock it. Just...just go back around and meet me on the other side okay?" She turned to see Dan scrambling to throw his clothes on while she tied her robe up tightly and made her way to the bathroom.

"Will you...um...?" She gestured at Dan to get in her closet.

"Really?" Dan scrunched his brow in discontent. He was offended, but it wasn't the worst thing she'd ever asked of him. He hastily shoved his shoes underneath his arm and scowled, but reluctantly did what he was told.

After Dan was settled, Blair took a moment to compose herself before calmly walking into the bathroom and unlocking the door. She was met with a suspicious little face staring up at her.

"Why was the door locked if you weren't in here?" Henry demanded, placing his hands on his hips precociously.

Blair forced a smile. "Well, I was in here earlier, and I guess I just forgot to unlock it when I was done," Blair explained nervously. "I'm sorry."

"Then why was the other door locked?" Henry continued. Blair could only sigh. She suddenly felt like she was being interrogated.

Dan was listening in from the closet door, easily detecting the sass radiating from the tiny Bass's tongue. It kind of reminded him of someone.

"I always lock my bedroom door for privacy, Henry." She replied firmly. Henry crossed his arms and cocked his head to the side.

"No you don't!" He snapped back pugnaciously.

"Yes, I do! I…I…" She stuttered. Taking a deep breath, she fought to regain her composure. "Henry. My dear, sweet and most observant son, do you intend to answer nature's call or not?" Blair forced a prudent smile. She was quickly losing patience.

"I can't go with you in here!" He shouted. An exasperated Blair bit her tongue as she turned to walk out, but not before she caught Henry scowling in her direction. She shut the door quietly behind her. She sighed as Dan began to emerge from the closet.

"He's uh...quite the little rascal," Dan noted in a low voice, trying to bring some levity to the situation. What he really wanted to do was ask Blair why she let her child speak to her like that. He knew parenting wasn't easy, but there was no way his child was ever going to talk to him in such a manner. Dan desperately wanted to believe that Chuck was responsible for this child's attitude, but as they say, "It takes a village."

"Yes. Quite." She replied with a hint of sarcasm, quietly looking down. "Well, he's just worn out. It's been an eventful past few days." She added, suddenly making excuses for him. The toilet flushed then, and the subsequent sound of the faucet running meant that Henry was washing his hands and would hopefully soon be returning to his bed. Blair watched for the crack of light under the door to go dark, which it finally did a few seconds later. They both then heard the door to the other bedroom close.

Blair heaved a huge sigh of relief and they exchanged a quick glance. A crinkle of a smile moved across Dan's face as he slowly began to approach her.

"Now. Where were we?" He asked suggestively. Blair exhaled as he lifted his hands up to encompass her face. His thumbs caressed her cheeks as her doe eyes fixated on his. He once again slowly placed his lips on hers.

God she needed this.

Dan's hands crawled down her sides to her waist, pulling her up against him. He could feel how tense she was when he tried to move her arms up around his neck and pulled away for a moment.

"You okay?" he asked with a concerned whisper.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be okay? Just...carry on." She gently commanded, closing her eyes. Dan moved in again, this time directing his attention to her neck. He pulled her hair away and began to place a series of tiny nibbles upon her satiny skin, beginning at the nape.

"Oh...oh please...Dan." She could once again feel all of her cares drifting away. Dan loved the reaction. His hands slowly started descending down her back, squeezing her ass firmly as he roughly shoved her against him. "Mmmm," she sighed with pleasure. Dan smiled between kisses, lightly dragging his teeth over the flesh of her neck with the gesture .

"Blair..." Dan continued to suck on her neck, skillfully alternating between licking and biting. "God...you taste..." From the corner of his eye he thought he saw a bit of movement from the direction of the bathroom door. Dan didn't have time to think anything of it, though. They were about to make the whole earth move. It was probably just a precursor of what was to come.

He slowly began to kiss his way down to her shoulder, his hands drifting down to untie her robe. He was just starting to move the fabric away when he was overcome with a feeling of discomfort. Dan stopped suddenly and tentatively opened his eyes. In the latest in a series of unfortunate events, he came face to face with little Henry Bass.

Dan could only think that the kid must have been part ninja. Neither he nor Blair had heard either door open. There were no footsteps on the bathroom tile. No squeaky door hinges. There was nothing at all to alert them of the visitor who had managed to once again interrupt their blissful reverie.

"Humphrey, why are you stopping?" Blair whined, attempting to press his head back down onto her neck.

"Blair..." Dan gulped. He struggled to clear his throat as he worked to free himself from her remarkably strong Kung Fu grip. He awkwardly gestured in the direction of the door.

Blair followed Dan's gaze. She instantly froze, a look of horror sinking in as she finally caught sight of Henry standing in the doorway. She instantly recognized Chuck's squinty, judgmental expression on his face. And for the second time that night, Blair embarrassingly worked to fix her robe, moving it back up around her shoulder. She bit her lip for a moment, trying to figure out the best way to explain to him what he'd just seen.

"Um, Henry, you know Mommy's friend...Dan?" Henry looked at Dan, the smug look still apparent on his face.

"Hey, what's up, Henry?" Dan asked a little too enthusiastically. For the first time in his life Dan couldn't think of anything else to say. There was no doubt Henry knew who he was, having seen him at different functions and get-togethers over the years. But whereas Serena was like an aunt to him, Dan definitely was not an uncle.

"Are you thirsty, darling? Did...did you need some...some water? Or juice?" Blair sighed nervously, stumbling over her words. "Or perhaps you're hungry? Would you like me to fix you a snack or…something…" Blair trailed as she could only stare at her son.

"I'm ready to go home now." The child suddenly blurted. Blair's mouth fell wide open.

"Um. Okay. Well, we will go home first thing in the morning." Blair said, miraculously managing a smile.

"No! I want to go home now and I want my Dad!" Henry said, stomping his foot.

"Well, we can't go home right now. Why don't you get back in the bed and try to go back to sleep-"

"No! I hate that stupid bed! I want my Dad and I want to sleep in _my_ bed!" Blair was the speechless now, and more than a little embarrassed that Dan was witnessing the episode.

Dan cringed at the sight of Blair struggling to come up with a suitable response.

"Well," Dan chimed in. "The thing is, your grandmother is leaving tomorrow, and I think you want to be here to say goodbye, don't you?"

"That's right." Blair added. "Yes, Nana has to go back home tomorrow and you know she'll want to see you."

"Please!" He wailed. "I just want my Dad!" He screamed as he turned around and ran back inside the bathroom.

"And I don't like you!" He stopped to yell in Dan's direction before slamming the door behind him.

'_Well…shit_.' Dan thought to himself. That wasn't necessarily a surprise. And it was probably only going to get worse when he realized his parents not living together was going to be a permanent thing. Blair covered her face with her hands. Dan walked over to her, trying to comfort her by massaging her shoulders, but she quickly shooed him off of her. "Dan, stop!"

He watched helplessly as she walked to the bathroom door, only to find it was locked from the inside.

"Henry!" Blair called out in an agitated tone. There was no response. She once again began to fumble with the knob, thinking maybe she could somehow rattle it open. "Henry!" When that didn't work, she turned and purposefully walked out of the bedroom and down the hallway. Dan followed behind tentatively. Blair turned Henry's bedroom doorknob only to find that it too was locked.

"Henry! Open this door this instant! I mean it, Henry! Open it right now!" She huffed as she began to furiously beat on the door. All Dan could think was how the stress of the situation couldn't be good for her and that she was probably going to wind up back in the hospital.

"Blair, just calm down-"

"_Henry_! You unlock this door _now_!" She screamed.

"I lock my door for privacy!" He yelled from the other side, taking her statement from earlier and now using it against her. Dan shook his head. Blair was fuming now and he noticed that her fists were clenched.

"Blair, do you want me to try to talk to him?" Dan asked hesitantly.

She instantly turned to him, completely offended. "Why?" She scoffed. "You don't think I can handle my own son?"

"No...I mean _yes_. I mean, no. Blair...that's not at all what I'm saying-"

"I...Don't. Need. Your. Help." She uttered icily. Dan lifted his hands in the air in a sign of surrender, then turned around and walked back into Blair's bedroom. He would be chalking this up to hormones and sexual frustration. Collapsing back onto the bed, he listened as Blair continued to beg Henry to come out of his room.

"Henry," he heard her say in a much sweeter, less demanding tone, "if you open the door..." Dan propped himself on his elbows, listening intently.

"We can...we'll go home and see Daddy." Dan rolled his eyes and dropped back on the bed in disbelief. Blair Waldorf, Queen Bee and ruler of the entire Upper East Side was at the mercy of a five year old.

"Okay?" Blair waited hopefully for Henry to open the door. A mere few seconds later, her son's little brown head popped out.

She smiled down at him. "Just give me a minute to get dressed." Blair assured as Henry gave a tiny nod. She walked back into the bedroom, ignoring Dan as she began to sift through her old closet. Dorota had made a run over to the apartment to pick up some clothes for her earlier in the day. She reached for a blouse and pencil skirt. Dan watched in astonishment.

"So that's it? You're just going to give in to his demands like that?" Blair angrily turned to face him.

"Dan, he's had a traumatic week. And we probably packed way too much in today. He's just tired and he wants to be in his own bed. It's understandable." She roughly pulled the blouse over her shoulders and began to fasten the buttons.

"Blair, that's not a child who's had a traumatic week. That's a child who's spoiled and needs discipline!" Dan immediately regretted his words, suddenly wishing he could muzzle himself in times like these. He closed his eyes, already preparing himself for the backlash.

He knew this would not end well.

If looks could kill, Dan would be six feet under right now. "How _dare_ you! You are _not_ a parent, Humphrey. You have _no_ idea what it's like. You raised Georgina's baby for what...a week? That was a blip. I don't...you don't..." Blair could feel her heart beating out of her chest. "You have absolutely _no right_ to tell me what my child needs! You don't even _know_ him!"

"Blair, I didn't mean-"

"You can see yourself out." She ordered harshly, turning back around to the closet so she wouldn't have to look at him anymore.

Dan felt like he'd just been hit with a two by four. He knew his words would elicit a strong reaction, but he never expected her to kick him out.

"Blair-"

"Just go, Humphrey." She was calmer now, but there was obvious hurt in her voice.

He shook his head, mentally cursing himself as he grabbed his coat and shoes. He was suddenly feeling an enormous amount of animosity towards Chuck junior as he exhaled and walked out the door. As Dan walked toward the staircase, he saw Henry leaning up against his door. He smirked and gave Dan a tiny wave. The intent behind his wave this time was unmistakable.

Victory was his.

* * *

"_God!_ Nate, that was _amazing!_ You are fucking incredible," she declared, still riding out the last waves of her orgasm.

Serena grabbed her forehead and sighed as she ran her fingers through her luxurious blonde tresses. She then dismounted Nate from her cowgirl position, still panting as she lay down next to him, yet still fairly energetic. She brought his arm up tightly around her so she could snuggle in against him.

"So, Archibald, was it good for you?" Serena purred in a sultry tone.

"Sure. Yeah. It was good," Nate replied tepidly. The truth was Serena's "noises" had been a bit of a distraction. They sounded a bit over the top and, frankly, a little unbelievable.

When Serena had shown up unannounced on his Long Island doorstep thirty minutes earlier, Nate was caught off guard. He had just gotten home from dinner with the Captain and thought he'd unwind with a blunt, maybe read through some Spectator articles. When Serena suggested a different way to unwind, Nate thought, "Sure. What the hell?"

"I'm so glad you were home. I was feeling so blue," Serena said in a pouty baby voice. She ran her fingers lightly over Nate's chest. "But now I feel..." she leaned up to give him a messy, lingering kiss.

Nate wondered if she planned on staying all night.

"Hopeful." She sighed with contentment. "Hey, I think I'm gonna go make us a little snack." She suddenly announced. "Be right back." Nate watched as a naked Serena bounced off the bed and paraded through the bedroom. She stopped to give him a cutesy little wink before walking out the door. Nate placed his hands behind his head. He knew Dan probably wouldn't have a problem with it. He was with Blair now, and heck, he was practically pimping her out to him the day after his Christmas party. But for some reason he wasn't completely comfortable with this situation. He wasn't interested in being in a long term relationship and Serena seemed to be acting a little...desperate.

Nate sighed, wondering if he could possibly escape into the shower before she came back. He slid his legs off the bed, but before his feet could even hit the floor, she had returned with a tray of strawberries and whipped cream. Nate eyed the tray, confused. That seems like more of a snack you would eat _before_ sex. Or during.

"So, your fridge is pretty barren. I'm surprised you even had this. Beer, whipped cream and strawberries were all I had to choose from. I think you could really use a woman's touch around here. At least someone to help you grocery shop!" She smiled as Nate shrugged.

"Nah."

Serena could tell she was losing Nate's attention. She needed to strike now.

She cleared her throat. "I guess I can tell you now the real reason I came over." Serena took a deep breath as she sat down with the tray next to Nate. Nate was once again confused. '_You mean it wasn't for the sex_?' He thought as he leaned over and reached for a strawberry.

"I had a huge fight with Dan earlier. I really just needed to talk to someone. I just...I don't know what to do, Nate." Nate gave her a look.

"Well, I'm sure he wasn't too happy about the people you brought in to search through his things. I mean, come on, Serena. Was that really necessary?" Serena was silent for a moment. Why was he taking Dan's side?

"I feel bad about that, Nate. That was my mother's doing. She and my attorney think he's been excessively cruel..." she said, pausing dramatically. "So they're trying to find things to support that theory and to show that he's been manipulating me all these years," she sniffed. "I don't know..." Her voice began to crack.

Nate looked up at her in shock. "Serena, I don't think what Dan did was intentional."

"Maybe not in the way you're thinking, but he _did_ use me Nate. It's clear now that he wasn't over Blair when we got married. I think he was just...maybe settling because Blair had gone back to Chuck. And don't even get me started on all of the things he wrote about me on 'Gossip Girl' over the years. I mean, he told the world I had an STD. Serena collapsed against the pillows as Nate made a figure eight in the whipped cream with a strawberry, remember the day that blast came out. He went and got tested immediately.

"I sound pathetic, don't I? Bringing something up that we all supposedly got past years ago?" She asked, wiping a forced tear away.

"No you're not...you're just...I mean this is rough on everyone," Nate said, trying his best to comfort her.

"Dan said he was going use you against me, Nate." Her forced tears had now turned to feigned had now turned to sobs. If tears had a voice then Serena van der Woodsen-Humphrey would be shouting 'I'm a manipulative liar' through a megaphone at this point.

"Use me against you? How?" Nate furrowed his brow bemusedly. His interest was piqued.

"He thinks that because we slept together then that levels the playing field." She sniffed. "That he won't owe me anything in the divorce because we both technically had affairs. But it's not like you and I have been traipsing around town and groping each other in public on New Year's like he and Blair have. But I'm not sure a judge will see it that way." She brought her knees up, holding them tightly up against her chest.

"I can't take anymore humiliation, Nate." She said softly as she stared out the window. Nate's face softened. He understood where she was coming from. Blair and Dan-theirs was a legitimate relationship. Emotional and physical. Whereas he and Serena were just...having fun. Such applied today's case as well. Nate was comforting her.

"I need to ask you something-" she suddenly cleared her throat and looked up at Nate. She then shook her head, as if thinking better of it. "Never mind."

"What? What Serena?" Nate leaned over her and softly caressed her shoulder. "Talk to me." She looked up again.

"My attorney...he kind of asked me if I...had any 'transgressions' on my record." Nate crinkled his brow.

"You know. If I had been unfaithful to Dan?" Serena explained. Nate suddenly had an 'a-ha' moment.

"Oh. Okay. And?"

"And I kind of told him...no." Nate had another 'a-ha' moment. Serena took a deep breath. "I hate to even ask you this but..."

"Serena...you want me to lie for you?!" Nate couldn't believe what she was asking of him.

She sat up straight. "No. Not lie. All I'm asking is if you're questioned, maybe just keep the information to a minimum. I mean, this..." she motioned between the two of them. "This isn't an affair. This is just...what it is. We're not hurting anyone. But Dan and Blair...they've destroyed two families, Nate. And Blair has a child! This is going to devastate him."

"I can't lie, Serena!" Nate protested, pinching the bridge of his nose in contrition.

"Then don't! Look, nobody knows about us. There are pictures of Dan and Blair plastered in every paper now. But there's no photographic evidence of us having ever been together."

"That you know of," Nate responded bluntly. "Besides," he argued, "Dan already knows about us anyway."

"But he has no proof. You can just tell him that he just...misunderstood what you were saying. It's semantics, really." Serena was prepared to turn on the full court press now.

"Nate, think about everything he's done to you. Remember when he told you he was going to let The Spectator publish his articles, but then went to Vanity Fair instead? I'm not even going to bother with his humiliating label for you at graduation when he was Gossip Girl. And you were only doing what you did to help your family. Something that _he _knew, but he didn't care because he was more worried about protecting his anonymity on that toxic website than anyone that he claimed to care about. He has no loyalty to you, Nate." She watched as Nate slowly recalled the Vanity Fair incident including all of the instances wherein Dan as Gossip Girl had indeed humiliated him in a very public format. He never really did get over the 'class whore' label.

"If you stay quiet, I was thinking maybe we could both benefit. I could start my column up again. You know, maybe focus on what it's like to have your husband leave you for your best friend?" She gave a strained laugh and shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe it's a stupid idea. I guess I'm just trying to see the bright side of things." She looked up sincerely at Nate.

"Nate, you know what Dan did versus what I did is not comparable. The reason I turned to you," she said wistfully, "was because Dan wouldn't even touch me anymore. He never even looked at me."

Nate looked at her pensively. He understood what she was saying. She had been lonely when they had slept together before. Just like she was lonely tonight. If Dan hadn't jilted her for her best friend and had been loyal to their marriage, Serena would have never sought comfort from him in the first place. Dan's actions had triggered hers.

"I suppose. I can..." he gulped_ "_...keep some information to myself." Nate gave a slight smile. He was now envisioning a resurrected "S by S" column for The Spectator and a giant billboard of Serena in Times Square. No doubt it would be a huge hit with female readers-a comfort to know that if it could happen to Serena van der Woodsen, it could happen to anyone.

"Thank you, Nate." Serena said sincerely. "You're one of my best friends. You know?" She leaned up and gave him a quick kiss on the lips, then smiled.

"So. Um. Do you wanna go for round two..." she bit on her lip suggestively, as she started to slowly massage him.

"Um. Okay." Nate's breath hitched and his eyes began to roll back into his head.

Serena smirked. She had him exactly where she wanted him.

* * *

Dan grabbed his head in agony at the sound of pots and pans clinking in the kitchen. After Blair unceremoniously dismissed him from the Waldorf penthouse, he had gone to drown his sorrows at "The Well" in Bushwick. He wasn't sure if he was angrier with himself, Blair, or her little brat of a son.

Right now he was probably the angriest with Rufus who seemed to be pulling out every pan he owned.

"Damn!" He yelped as he looked over in the direction of the bedroom door.

He couldn't even remember coming back to the loft last night as he looked out the window. Suddenly, he remembered the meeting he had today with his agent and publisher. '_Oh shit_.' He thought, his eyes widening from the realization.

He searched around for his phone, realizing he was still fully clothed, and the phone was deep in his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at the screen, sighing in frustration. It was completely dead.

Dan stood up and scratched his head, finding his charger and plugging in his phone. He had absolutely no clue what time it was or what he should be doing. What he did know was that he needed some aspirin for his pounding headache. He stood up and gingerly made his way to the door towards the kitchen. He did a double take when he recognized a flash of blonde sitting on a stool at the kitchen island.

"Jenny?" Jenny turned around to see Dan hobbling over from his room. Her mouth opened with excitement.

"Dan!" She hopped off of her stool and made a beeline toward him, hugging him around his neck. Dan cringed at the sound of her shrieking voice, but gently reciprocated the hug. Rufus smiled warmly at the sight of his children's reunion. Jenny then pulled away, but not before getting a good whiff of him.

"Dan? Why do you smell like a distillery? And you slept in your clothes? Ew." He ran his fingers through his hair as he started to make his way to the pantry. There were just way too many questions being thrown at him right now. Noticing Dan's discomfort, Rufus grabbed a mug, filling it to the brim with hot coffee.

Dan opened the pantry door and proceeded to go shelf by shelf, moving aside cans of tomato sauce and boxes of pasta. "Where's the uh...the um...?"

"The aspirin?" Rufus guessed, pulling a giant bottle out from the drawer he was standing in front of. He opened the bottle and handed Dan three aspirin as he began to fill up a glass of water. Dan instantly shoved them down, swallowing them without water. "Ahem," he said as he handed the glass to his son, prodding him to drink. Dan rapidly chugged the entire glass down in one swig.

"Well. Looks like someone had a little too much fun last night with his _girlfriend_," Jenny teased. "Do I need to hop on Page Six?"

Dan cut his eyes at her. "There was definitely no fun being had last night." Dan set his sights on the mug of coffee Rufus had just poured him. "What time is it anyway?"

Rufus looked at his watch. "It's a quarter to nine. What time is your editor meeting again?"

"Three. Three o'clock," Dan said groggily, taking a long sip of coffee.

"Great. That gives us time to get caught up as a family. Jenny doesn't have to be at the atelier until eleven." Rufus announced.

"Dad's making eggs Benedict. Dan, you get to whisk the Hollandaise." Jenny laughed.

"I think maybe we should let Dan off the hook this time." Rufus winked as he began to arrange his English muffins on a tray. "Looks like he had a rough night."

"So tell us about this rough night, Dan!" Jenny prodded with a knowing smirk.

"Which part?" He answered crossly. "The part where I can't seem to get any divorce attorneys to return my calls? Or the part where Serena has investigators combing through the apartment, examining all of my clothes and belongings?"

'_Or the part where Blair kicked me out of her mother's penthouse and her kid mocked me with a sarcastic wave._'

Rufus looked up in shock.

"Geez." Jenny scoffed. "I knew Serena would be mad, but that just sounds-"

"Spiteful." Rufus chimed in. "Sounds like I need to give Lily a call."

"No, Dad. Don't. Don't do that. I can handle Serena. Just as soon as I get an attorney to call me back."

"Dan, why didn't you just ask me? I mean, it's nothing I like to brag about but I have been in your shoes a couple of times. I'll get Doug Collier's number for you." Dan nodded reluctantly. It was mildly humiliating that he couldn't even manage to find his own divorce attorney without his father's help. He needed to change the subject ASAP.

"So. You're really back, huh?" Dan asked Jenny as he walked over to the sink and filled his empty glass back up with water.

"Don't sound too excited." Jenny shot back sarcastically.

"No, I didn't mean it like that. Guess I just thought you'd want to share the news with your own brother before alerting _Nate_." Dan answered with his own touch of sarcasm. Rufus looked up curiously from his English muffins.

"And I thought you would have already heard about it from_ Blair_, considering you guys have been spending so much _quality _time together." Jenny smiled devilishly.

"Guess not." He replied curtly. Dan took the opportunity to chug down his second glass of water before switching back to his coffee.

"Uh-oh..." Jenny knew a pouty lovesick Dan when she saw one. "Well, I guess Serena's not the only problem you have. Sounds like trouble in paradise."

"Something wrong, son?" Rufus asked as he surveyed his son's face. "Besides the obvious hangover you're sporting and the clothes which are growing into your body?"

"Blair kind of...pissed me off last night." Jenny's eyes lit up.

"Oh? Did it have to do with Chuck?"

"Jenny. Please." Rufus warned his daughter. Dan shook his head.

"No. It wasn't about _Chuck_. Well, not directly anyway. It was about Henry." Rufus nodded his head knowingly. "Blair just lets him run all over her. She gives in to all of his demands."

"Dan? Are you jealous...of a five year old?" Dan shot his sister a look as she began to laugh uncontrollably.

Was he jealous? No. Angry? Absolutely. Blue balls twice in one night wasn't something he would wish on anyone. He knew better than to let his family in on the part where Henry caught him and Blair sliding into third base.

"Jenny." Rufus warned again. She rolled her eyes, but gave the "my lips are zipped for now" signal. Rufus took a deep breath before rendering some fatherly advice. "Dan. Remember. Blair's in a difficult situation right now. With divorce on the horizon, I'm sure she's just trying be as attentive to him as possible. Sometimes as parents we find ourselves overcompensating when we know we're approaching rough waters. My advice would be just to sit tight. Be supportive. And whatever you do, don't try to tell her how to parent." Jenny couldn't help but notice that Dan's eyes nearly doubled in size with Rufus's last few words of advice.

"Uh-oh, Dad. I think it might be a little too late for that!" Jenny snorted as she grabbed one of the English muffins and began to nibble on it.

Rufus eyed his son. "Dan? You didn't..."

"I might have..."

"Honestly, Dad." Jenny piped in to defend him. "It's not like Blair doesn't know her son's a brat." She turned to Dan. "So what did you say exactly?"

"Without getting too specific...I may have told her that Henry was spoiled and needed discipline." He let the last part spew out as quickly as he could.

Rufus gave him a pained look as he reached for his mug. "Dan. That's...not good."

"Jesus, Dan. Why don't you just call Social Services while you're at it?" Jenny teased.

"I know. I know," Dan shook his head regretfully. "I knew from the moment the words came out of my mouth. It was just a...an uncontrollable response. I guess she probably won't be speaking to me for the foreseeable future."

"It's a lesson we've all had to learn at some point." Rufus said comfortingly. "Someday when you have your own kids, you'll understand. Parenting is not as easy as it looks."

And little did Rufus know that the day was fast approaching. What was going to happen when he and Blair took opposing views on how to raise this baby? Not to mention Henry. It wasn't too soon to consider that he would probably be his stepfather at some point. And the kid detested him.

Jenny rested her head on her hand. "So? When _are_ you and Blair going to give Rufus here a grandkid?" She quipped. Dan nearly choked on his coffee.

"Hopefully, no time soon!" Rufus blurted. "I think we have enough drama to keep us all occupied for quite some time. Now everyone standby. It's time to poach." Jenny and Dan watched as their father grabbed some vinegar, eggs, and a slotted spoon from off the counter. He worked his way over to a pot of water he had simmering on the stove. While Rufus was distracted, Jenny leaned in toward Dan.

"Hey," she whispered, "you know, I'll be seeing Blair later. Do you need me to give her a message for you? Perhaps a notarized letter of apology?" Dan shook his head.

"No. I actually think the best thing I can do right now is to just…let her cool off. I've got to finish up my last chapter before my meeting, anyway." Jenny smiled and gave her big bro a pat on the back.

"And I think you may want to take a shower."

* * *

Blair was still livid. She had arrived at her apartment in the middle of the night with Henry only to find that Chuck was nowhere to be found. Now it was midmorning and there still was no sign of him there or at Bass Industries. She grabbed her phone and dialed his number. When it went to voicemail, she left him another message.

"Chuck. Henry won't stop asking for you. Call. Me. Back." Blair was upset with herself. She had argued with Dan even though she knew he was right. Henry needed discipline, but she had been in a horrible position. She was so leveled with guilt after Henry caught her and Dan and she was scared he was going to be scarred for life. She hadn't gotten the first ounce of sleep last night. All she could think about was the look on her child's face. She had tried to get Henry to talk about it a bit in the town car, but he had once again stopped speaking to her. And not that it mattered, but she just knew Henry would tell Chuck about what he saw the first chance he had. She was already dreading the theatrics.

Blair's phone rang and she quickly answered it.

"Blair? Are the two of you coming back over here for breakfast or not?" Eleanor asked indignantly.

"Yes, Mother. We're coming over now."

"Well, I still don't understand why you took off in the middle of the night! 'Because Henry wanted to' is not an excuse. You need to stop spoiling him, Blair." Blair bit her tongue. Like she should be giving parenting advice. "By the way, Randall Kinmont, an attorney in Cyrus's firm is supposed to be calling you later. He just has a few questions for you." Blair took a deep breath, as a jolt of apprehension pulsated through her veins. This was it. It was really going to happen now. The divorce ball was rolling.

Blair heard her phone beep, indicating an incoming call. She looked at the caller ID. _Chuck_.

"Okay, Mother. Well, we are on our way. See you soon." Blair clicked over to answer Chuck's call.

"Where have you been?" she demanded.

"What do you mean?" Chuck asked, obviously caught off guard.

"I mean, you're not here. You're not at the apartment. And you haven't been here all night. So where are you staying?"

"Oh. Well, I'm at the office. Stayed late working on the Hong Kong deal and fell asleep on the couch. Why...are you at the apartment?" He asked hesitantly. "I thought the two of you were staying at the Penthouse."

Blair didn't believe his bullshit for a second but she wasn't going to argue.

"Well, _your_ son decided to throw a hissy fit last night and demanded to see you." Chuck smiled at this. "Come to find it was all for nothing. Because you weren't even here!" Blair was screaming into the phone now and Chuck had to hold it away from his ear.

"Well, please. Give him my apologies. Tell him I can make it up to him, though. I've got tickets to the Knicks game tonight."

"Whatever, Chuck. I have to go. I'm meeting my mother for breakfast and then I'll be at the atelier. You can pick him up from Dorota at the penthouse this evening." Blair suddenly had the urge to purge and reached for her purse.

"Wait, Blair. We're still meeting for lunch today, right? Sirio? One o'clock?" Blair had completely forgotten. The last thing she wanted was to dine with Chuck alone, but as much as she was dreading it, she probably needed to start divorce discussions. There was no sense in putting it off anymore. And the sooner she talked to Chuck, the sooner she could start dealing with how to broach the subject with Henry.

"Yeah...one o'clock," she repeated unenthusiastically as she rifled through her purse for her Bentyl.

"Great." Chuck paused for a moment. He could tell from the sound of her voice that she was distracted by something. "Blair?"

"What, Chuck?" She was getting increasingly annoyed because she couldn't find her pill bottle and because Chuck was keeping her tied up on the phone.

"I love you."

Blair rolled her eyes. _Oh, puhleeze_. "I have to go," Blair said as she finally got her hands on the elusive bottle. She popped it open, and shoved one of the tiny blue pills in her mouth, reaching over to the coffee table for a glass of water she had sitting in front of her. She quickly swigged it back.

"Henry!" She called up the stairs. "Time to go!"

Maybe it was the hormones. Maybe it was the lack of sleep. But Blair wouldn't be taking anymore crap today. From anyone.

* * *

"Vogue will be doing a spread on the updated sundress collection next month. Jenny, you will need to send over the new samples for the shoot. I also have introductory lunches lined up for you the next two weeks with some of the editors and buyers you'll be dealing with regularly now. Blair, I'll expect you to go with her to formally make the introductions." Blair nodded and Eleanor looked around. She had the feeling she was forgetting something. "Oh, Georgina Chapman has her Global Clean Water fundraiser next weekend. That will be another opportunity for you to network." Blair made a face. That also happened to be an event Serena usually co-hosted.

Eleanor turned to Jenny and whipped off her glasses. "Are you sure you can handle this?" Before Jenny could answer, Blair piped in. "Mother, of course she can. It's not like she still won't be answering to me." She scoffed. "If she steps out of line, I'll shove her back in with my Jimmy Choo."

"Well, thank you both, so much, for this opportunity. As much as I love designing, getting to learn more about the business side of things is thrilling!" Eleanor glared at her. She could have done without the reminder that Jenny was essentially learning on the job.

"Yes, well. You have to remember to keep the buyers happy. Schmooze. The key is exposure. Staying on their radar." Blair nodded effusively in agreement with her mother. "You must keep your finger on their pulses. Listen to their feedback. Melinda and Whitney should be able manage things in house when you're out and about." Jenny looked up to see the two women who were laying out fabric.

"Any questions?" Eleanor asked. Jenny shook her head no. "No, but it's good to know that Blair is here, just in case.

Blair scoffed. "Don't think I'm going to be picking up your slack just because you're new, little J." She added. "You're going to be putting in more hours than you ever have in your life." Jenny gave a half-hearted smile in Blair's direction. If Dan hadn't told her about his argument with Blair and the issues she was having with Henry, she might have been a little less accepting of her remarks. She knew Blair was simply taking out some frustration on her.

"Well, at any rate, my car will be here in fifteen minutes. Blair, darling, a word?" Jenny watched as Eleanor ushered her daughter into what would soon be Jenny's office. She was truly grateful for the promotion, but was still curious about the real reason Blair was stepping away from Waldorf Designs. Lots of people got divorces. But they didn't normally abandon their jobs because of it, even if it did promise to be a particularly stressful one. Jenny watched Blair curiously through the glass.

"Did you talk to Randall yet?" Eleanor asked before she even closed the door.

"Not yet." Blair had a seat in her chair. "But I've already decided I'm not going to ask for anything. Just joint custody of Henry and equitable distribution of property. The easier I make it on Chuck, the more likely he won't contest."

Eleanor glanced at Blair's stomach. "Well, if one thing's certain, it's that you need to end this marriage as quickly as possible. I just hope for your sake you're right about Chuck. That he's seen the error of his ways and will now do the right thing." Eleanor furrowed her brow and looked down at her daughter. It was a look she'd seen many times before.

"What is it Mother?" Blair asked impatiently. "I know it's something."

"Blair, I just can't help but think that you need to consider asking for _full_ custody of Henry. You just never know when-"

Blair huffed. "Mother, you know I can't do that! There's no way Chuck would ever agree to it. And it would just draw everything out. This is an agreement that will be inoffensive to all parties." Eleanor said nothing as she rifled through some paperwork, an apprehensive look on her face. She suddenly put her hands up in the air, an apprehensive look on her face. "Okay, okay. I trust you know what you are doing." She studied her daughter who was now chewing on her thumbnail and staring out the window. She was looking thin and haggard.

"Oh, maybe I just need to stay a few more days. I think Jenny isn't quite ready to be let off the leash just yet. I'm just going to call Cyrus and-"

"What? No! Mother! Cyrus needs his wife!"

"Darling, I think he'll understand." Blair watched as her mother grabbed her phone and made the call. An agitated Blair rose up from her chair and grabbed her purse and coat, storming from the office. Jenny watched as she headed for the exit. She quickly followed behind her out onto the bustling street.

"Blair! Where are you going?" Jenny shouted from behind. Blair rolled her eyes and turned to face her.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't aware I had to run my schedule by you! If you must know, I have a lunch date."

"A lunch _date_?" Jenny asked curiously, a smile creeping onto her face.

"I'm sorry. Did I stutter? Yes. A lunch date."

"Like...a lunch date with Dan perhaps?" Blair shut her eyes in disgust. One thing she hadn't considered when suggesting Jenny for this position was that she would perpetually be all up in her business. And presently, she was a little horrified thinking of what Dan might have possibly been sharing with her.

"Jenny, just because you're back in New York doesn't mean you can ask me anything you want about my personal life." Blair said with exasperation.

"I understand." Blair then nodded and turned toward the street to survey the cab situation. Jenny closed her eyes, telling herself to walk away, but she just couldn't keep her mouth shut, though. She had to say something on Dan's behalf.

"Look, Blair..." Blair sighed in frustration as she turned back to face Jenny. I don't know what happened with you and Dan last night and I know it's none of my business, but I can tell you that he's pretty distraught about it. I just thought you should know." Blair took a concentrated step towards her.

"Jenny? Do you and your brother discuss…_everything_?" Blair was especially curious if he had discussed the pregnancy with her.

"Honestly, Blair, Dan didn't tell me anything really. Just that you two had a disagreement, but that he was completely to blame."

"He actually said that?" Blair asked curiously, trying to mask her excitement that Dan would be taking complete culpability for the situation.

"Yeah," Jenny replied with unease. A little embellishment never hurt, Jenny thought. "He said that you're an incredible mother."

Well, now she knew Jenny was lying. "And anything else?"

"No. That's it. He was super hungover this morning so he wasn't really in the mood to talk. He even slept in his clothes last night." Jenny added. Blair crinkled her nose in disgust at that last detail which she honestly could have done without.

"I know, right?" Jenny added, going off Blair's expression.

Blair studied Jenny's face for a moment. Judging from the direction of the conversation, Blair was fairly secure that Dan hadn't told her about the pregnancy yet.

"Anyway," Jenny continued, "I just...thought you should know. He's got his book meeting at three, but I'm sure he'll be at the loft after that," she made sure to add. Blair said nothing as she turned to hail a taxi. She then turned back around to Jenny once more.

"IMG sent over look books for some of their newer clients," Blair said sharply. They're sitting on the desk. See if there's anyone worth using." Jenny nodded, recognizing a dismissal when she saw one. A cab pulled up. Jenny turned to make her way back inside but turned around to see Blair reach for the handle, then pause abruptly. She noticed Blair making an odd face, almost like she was in some sort of discomfort, but she seemed to shake it off quickly. Jenny knew Blair had been in the hospital with food poisoning. From the looks of things it was still taking its toll on her.

"The Pierre, please." She yelled at the driver before she was even all the way inside the cab. Jenny watched until the cab completely disappeared into traffic, then quickly pulled out her phone.

She quickly sent off a text to Dan.

_"Hey, are you and Blair having lunch?"_

Dan quickly responded.

_"No. Why?" _

_"No reason."_

Not a second later Jenny's phone rang.

"Jenny? Why are you texting me these cryptic messages? I have less than two hours to finish these pages for my last chapter!"

"Sorry. Blair just said she had a lunch date. I thought maybe it was with you. Sue me. Anyway, why don't you just turn off your phone if you don't want to be disturbed?" Jenny countered.

"I-"

"Oh, I see. Because you'd be fine getting a call or text from _Blair_. But not your own sister..." Dan ignored his sister's obvious taunt, but he was now curious who Blair was dining with.

"It was probably a business lunch." Dan surmised.

"No. If it were business related, Eleanor would have had me go with her." Jenny clarified. Dan struggled to think for a moment.

"Well, maybe she's meeting her divorce attorney. Though she didn't mention that she was meeting with her divorce attorney last night, but maybe she didn't know at the time. Then again she hadn't even mentioned that she'd started looking for a divorce attorney. And we actually discussed divorce attorneys last night-"

Dan shook his head. She was having lunch with Chuck. He knew it. Why wouldn't she just tell him these things?

When Dan left the penthouse last night and after his talk with Nate, among the many things swimming in and out of his head was how he wasn't comfortable with her being around Chuck alone, especially in her condition. What if she had a sudden onset of nausea? Chuck wasn't stupid. He had obviously been there during her pregnancy with Henry where she suffered the same symptoms. Dan was fearful that he would find out and fly into a fit of rage and punch another window, or worse...

As if reading her brother's thoughts, Jenny interrupted. "Dan, stop being so neurotic. The lunch is at The Pierre, by the way. I should probably get back to work now before Eleanor murders me on my first day. Bye!"

Dan stared at his computer screen. He clinched his fist and closed his eyes. No. No. He needed to finish this chapter.

"The Pierre..."

Dan shook his head and placed his phone back on the charger next to his computer.

"Stop thinking. Start working." He scolded himself as he went back to typing. Seconds later another text arrived. "Damn it, Jenny!" He looked down at his phone, noticing it seemed to be a picture. And it wasn't from Jenny, but from an unknown number. He clicked on it to enlarge it. It was a picture of Blair, Chuck, and Henry eating at a restaurant together. Blair was smiling at a laughing Henry and Chuck was patting his son on the back. Underneath the picture was a message.

_"Spotted. An adorable family dining together at Serafina yesterday. P.S. Have a good meeting ;)"_

Dan slammed his phone down. If this was Chuck messing with him... He picked the phone back up and reviewed the photo again.

"Yesterday?"

* * *

The hostess at Sirio began to walk Blair to the table where Chuck had apparently been seated for a while. From the front of the restaurant, she could already see a plate of caviar and a bottle of Dom.

"Oh no..." she mumbled under her breath as she spotted her husband. He smiled, standing upon her arrival. He walked over to pull out her chair for her. She responded with her own tepid smile and had a seat.

"I took the liberty of ordering the Ossetra." Chuck nodded at a man who was standing nearby. He quickly made his way over and pulled the champagne bottle out of its chiller. He presented it to Blair then proceeded to open and pour it into awaiting flutes. Blair eyed the caviar. She was already starting to feel ill and now Chuck was apparently trying to pull out all the stops for what she thought was to be a low key lunch. It was only getting worse as she cringed at the fish eggs sitting before her.

She waited for the server to retreat before questioning him.

"What is this, Chuck?" Chuck cocked his head back.

"This is lunch, Blair."

Blair shook her head. "No, Chuck. That is not _lunch_. I know what you're doing. You think champagne and caviar is going to change my mind?" Chuck sat up straight.

"Change your mind about what, Blair? It's just lunch. By the way, I went ahead and ordered you the artichoke salad and the flounder."

"Well, cancel it. I can't stay."

"What? Blair..."

"I'm not interested in making mindless chit chat with you, Chuck. I got no sleep last night because Henry insisted that I take him back to the apartment so he could be near you. But you were God knows where doing God knows whom...and it reminded me-"

"What are you talking about, Blair? I told you I fell asleep at the office. Call Sam at the security desk if you don't believe. I thought we had a nice time yesterday. Henry was happy. I thought _you_ were happy." Chuck was really having to up his game now.

"That was for Henry. But now it's time to stop dancing around the subject of you, me and divorce." Chuck sat quietly and reached for his glass of champagne, taking a quick angry sip.

"Really. You really want a divorce?"

"Yes." Blair answered bluntly.

He slammed his glass down. "Well, I don't."

"Chuck, please do not make this difficult. I'm not even asking anything from you. And I'm going to request joint custody." Chuck licked his lips and leaned in over the table.

"If you think I'm letting you off the hook so you can run to Brooklyn and be Dan Humphrey's permanent whore you have another thing coming." He said, loudly enough that people were now starting to turn around and whisper.

"And there it is. I should have known everything you said at the park yesterday was bull. And what a nice way to talk to the mother of your son. This is exactly why I'm leaving you. You don't own me Chuck, though you've literally treated me like property since high school. And I'm tired of the endless cycle of you declaring that you've changed when you really haven't. This conversation is proof. Forget all of the prostitutes you've slept with. Forget that you just kidnapped our child." Blair was fuming now, her lip trembling.

"Blair, if you leave you will regret it." Chuck gritted, his fist in a clench on the table.

"Is that a threat?" Blair asked in disbelief.

"Your son is going to hate you for breaking up our family."

"Newsflash. He already hates me. Today at least. And tomorrow he'll love me again. But I don't love you today. And I won't love you tomorrow. And every day I stay married to you is another day I'm completely ashamed of myself." Blair paused and took a sip of water. Her face felt hot and she knew it was just a matter of time before she needed to run to get to a restroom.

Chuck solemnly shook his head. "You don't mean that."

"I do. I am leaving you, Chuck. And it's not for Dan. It's for me." Blair began to stand up as a wave of nausea hit. She steadied herself on the table. Chuck immediately stood up and grabbed her arm. "You're not leaving, Blair." He said, teeth clinched. "You said what you wanted to say now you can stay and listen to me."

"Let go of me, Chuck." Blair warned, trying to free herself. A couple of male patrons were slowly starting to rise from their tables.

"Blair, please just sit down." Chuck begged, tightening his grip.

"We're in a public restaurant, Chuck, and you're hurting me!" Chuck looked around and finally noticed the two patrons and a manager making their way over to the table.

Chuck released her arm, but not before whispering. "Please, Blair." Blair looked at him. She'd seen that pathetic face a hundred times before. Anytime his father was disappointed in him. When she told him she was marrying Louis. When he realized his mother was alive but wanted nothing to do with him. When he lost his hotel.

"I need to go to the ladies' room." Blair said softly, fighting back tears. Chuck nodded and watched as she grabbed her purse. She made her way inside, still shaking from the confrontation. She tried to calm herself by taking a deep breath. She leaned over the counter, looking at herself in the mirror.

"Ugh." She looked like death. She was struck with another pang of nausea and quickly made her way into one of the stalls. She proceeded to get on her knees and puke up the croissant and orange juice she'd had earlier. Blair heard someone enter the stall next to her, but it didn't deter her from continuing to empty the entire contents of her stomach. Blair moved to a seated position, leaning up against the toilet bowl. She began to sift through her purse for her pills. When she finally found them, her hands were trembling so badly that she dropped the bottle on the floor, and it rolled under the stall next to her. "Damn it." She then watched as a hand casually picked the bottle up off the floor, passing it back under the stall.

"Thank you." Blair offered weakly. She got no response.

Blair shrugged and picked herself up off the ground, flushing the toilet behind her. She exited the stall and started to wash her hands, then opened the pill bottle and shoved one in her mouth, using a handful of water from the tap to wash it down. As she dried her hands, she took a curious look at the stall that had been next to hers. It was completely silent. Blair threw her paper towel in the trash and walked out the door.

Georgina emerged from her stall, a giant smirk on her face. "Blair Waldorf Bass has a Humphrey bun in the oven. Now _these_ are the moments that truly make life worth living." Georgina pulled out her phone and began to text furiously.

When Blair returned to the table, Chuck was sitting with his head in his hands. She didn't bother to sit down and he didn't bother to look up. "Don't worry about coming for Henry tonight. I'll just explain to him that you're stuck in another _business_ meeting." Chuck looked up, expressionless. He said nothing.

"Goodbye, Chuck." With that she turned to walk toward the exit, ignoring the hushed whispers and knowing stares she was currently being pelted with.

A dazed Chuck picked up his phone and dialed. "Jack. Forget what I said. It's over." He said in a defeated tone. He paused for a moment and took a sip of his champagne. "I'm coming back to the office now." He was about to hang up when something suddenly occurred to him. "Wait. I need to know what Patrick van Heusen's track record is in child custody cases. I will accept nothing less than full custody of my son."

* * *

Dan looked at his watch and sighed. _One forty-five_. The meeting was at three. And because the meeting was at three, Dan would need to show up by two-thirty. If you weren't early you were late. He was printing off the last of his pages, somehow managing to complete them in record time-despite the picture he now had ingrained in his head of Chuck, Blair, and Henry. When discussing Blair and Henry's day with her last night, she had apparently left off the part where they had dined with Chuck, and frankly, Dan was a little irritated.

Thank God for this meeting. He needed the distraction.

More than likely he would have a ton of notes coming his way from Carrie Douglas, his editor at Random House-long gone were the days of Jonathan Karp and Simon and Schuster. He knew the quality wasn't the standard he would normally hold himself to, but with everything going on, the fact that he had even managed to finish it at all was a miracle. He was satisfied.

Dan grabbed his coat and his satchel. He shoved his pages inside a binder, ready to make the fairly quick jaunt over to Cipriani's downtown. Rufus was in the living room, strumming his guitar as Dan headed for the door.

"Dinner tonight?" Rufus queried. "Maybe a little spinach gnocchi? A little fennel salad?"

"I don't know, Dad. I uh...I'll call you when I'm done with this meeting." Rufus nodded and his phone rang. "Oh! It's Lisa." Dan smiled as his Dad took a call from his ex-girlfriend and tour mate. See? They could be amiable. Why did Serena have to be a raging bitch?

Dan closed the door to the loft behind him. Before he could make it to the street, he was alerted to a text arriving. Dan shuddered to think that it might be another perfect family portrait from the Gossip Girl clone. He looked at his phone with ambivalence. Just as he thought, it was from the same unknown number and had another picture attached to it. Dan frowned as he opened up the file.

Just as he thought, it was a picture of Chuck and Blair. Dan studied it closely. They were obviously standing in a restaurant, tables all around. From the strained looks on their faces, and judging by the facial expressions of those dining around them, they were having some sort of argument. That became even more apparent as Dan saw how Chuck was gripping Blair's arm. She seemed to be trying to yank it away. It made Dan sick to his stomach.

Underneath the picture was yet another message.

_"Spotted. Mr. and Mrs. Bass airing their dirty laundry over lunch at Sirio. And from what I heard in the ladies' room, it's only going to continue to pile up. ;)" _

Dan's mouth fell open.

_"WHO IS THIS?" _Dan angrily texted back. He knew he should have probably just ignored it, but he was no longer thinking straight. He gritted his teeth. As he had predicted, Chuck's inability to control his temper had struck again. Dan scrolled down to his agent's number and dialed. Luckily, it went straight to voicemail.

"Marco, I am so sorry. I'm going to have to cancel. I had this emergency come up. Please apologize to Carrie for me. And tell her I'll messenger the pages over to her in the morning."

Dan hung up right as he received another incoming text.

_"That's for me to know and for you to find out." _

Dan shook his head in frustration and headed for the subway. Just before he was about to hop on, he received another text. It was another picture. This time of a long-beaked water fowl in its natural habitat. "What is that, a stork?" And the accompanying message? _"Congrats."_

* * *

AN: Can't wait to hear your thoughts, reviewers. I know I make it sound like Henry is a devil child, and he is, but I think he's just a product of his environment. ;)

I realize I've probably offended Serena lovers out there, Nate lovers, too. I highly doubt any Chuck lovers are reading this. Just realize I've loved all of these characters at one time or another.

Thank you to Jai (vampslaying101) for tidying this up and for the never-ending brainstorming sessions. You are awesome!

Anyway, as usual, thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing. I'm having a blast with this story and your feedback prods me onward.

Erin


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Blair was still shaking when she returned to the penthouse. She immediately stripped off her coat and headed for the stairs. All she wanted to do was jump in the bed and pull the covers up over her head for the rest of the day. Chuck had reacted worse than she could have imagined. After their talk at the park and their dinner with Henry, she had been duped into believing that he was somehow going to accept that their crumbling marriage was officially over, and it had been for a while. But it had all been a ruse.

Thankfully, Dorota had taken Henry out to a playgroup at the park. She didn't want her son to see her like this.

Blair knew she had no one to blame but herself. She should have ended it with Chuck months ago. Years, really. The tension had been building for a while now. Bringing Dan into the mix was the final straw. She could expect him to wage a full on, prolonged assault.

She was also keenly aware that the child she was currently carrying could end up costing her the one she already had. Time was not on her side.

To make things worse, her damn nausea pills didn't seem to be working with the efficacy that they had been promised. It was only going to be a matter of time before someone picked up on the fact that she was regularly vomiting; Someone _besides_ Dorota.

It was two-thirty in the afternoon, but Blair stripped down to her underwear and crawled into bed anyway. Before she could settle in, she was unkindly interrupted by the sound of her cell phone blasting. She sat up, gingerly lifting herself from off of the bed. She made her way to the dresser where her purse sat and pulled out her phone, not recognizing the number.

"Hello?" she answered tentatively.

"Blair? It's Randall Kinmont."

Blair tiredly swung her legs onto the side of the bed. "Oh. Yes. Mr. Kinmont. Thank you for getting in touch."

"I had a client cancel on me this afternoon. I was wondering if you had some time available later?" Blair rubbed the back of her neck. This meeting wasn't really something she had been looking forward to, but the sooner she knew what she was dealing where Chuck was concerned, the better. "Sure," she replied less than enthusiastically. "What time?"

"Let's say four o'clock? Sant Ambroeus?"

"Okay..."

"I'll see you then."

Just as Blair was hanging up the phone, she heard the sound of the elevator doors opening. She popped her head out of the bedroom door.

"Dorota?"

Having just sprinted from the subway, Dan took a moment to compose himself before answering. He wasn't sure how she was going to react to him being here, and he wasn't even sure what he wanted to say. He just wanted to make sure she was okay.

And he _truly_ hoped that Henry wasn't in the vicinity.

"It's me!" He finally called up to her, still unnerved from the congratulatory "stork" message he had received on his phone back at the loft. He checked for messages one more time, making sure nothing else had come through while he was underground.

"Dan?" Blair pulled her dress back on at the sound of him racing up the stairs. She looked up just in time to see him standing in front of her, completely out of breath.

"Humphrey, what are you-"

He looked her over from head to toe. "Are you okay?" He asked with a worried tone.

"I'm fine," she said, less than convincingly and more than a little confused, "why?" Dan was annoyed that she still seemed bent on keeping her lunch date with Chuck a secret from him.

"Blair, I know you had lunch with Chuck today." He pulled out his phone and showed her the incriminating picture. "And apparently it didn't go so well." Blair's jaw dropped as she surveyed the photo and winced at this sight of Chuck gripping her arm. "Ugh," she scoffed, "who sent that to you...?" As if she didn't know. There was only one person she could think of in that moment. Tall. Blonde. Way too much eye makeup. The same person who had seen her off in a taxi under a barrage of nosy questions.

She was going to ring Jenny's neck.

"That's the thing. I don't know who sent it. But luckily someone did or I would never have known about Chuck laying his hands on you today!" Blair heaved a sigh. He watched her for a moment, sensing she was still distressed from it.

"I was going to tell you, Dan. I just…" She swallowed lightly. "Truthfully, I forgot I was even meeting him today. This pregnancy...my memory just seems to be edging on substandard all of a sudden. I really wasn't trying to keep anything from you." She explained, still a bit frazzled. Dan really wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she had already kept one family dinner with Chuck and Henry from him. "That picture...it wasn't as bad as it looks," she explained, "it's just that when I got to the restaurant, I guess he misinterpreted why we were there. Or _I_ misinterpreted. Anyway, I snapped on him. And I told him. I just told him it was over for good." She bit her bottom lip. "I guess I underestimated how badly he'd take it." Dan took a step towards her, cupping her face in his hands.

"Blair, I'm sorry. I know this is hard on you. And I know I'm not making it any easier." He added, in an obvious nod to last night's theatrics with Henry. Blair took a breath.

"It wasn't your fault. I was just frustrated. I should never have taken it out on you."

"But you had every right. And I'm sorry. I overstepped my bounds. You are a good Mom, Blair." Dan added, trying to boost her confidence up a bit.

Blair rolled her eyes. "You don't have to lie to me, Humphrey."

"No, it's true." He said as he gently caressed her cheek. "You _are_ a good mother. You always put Henry first. You do whatever it takes to try and make him happy." Blair shook her head. Trying and doing were two different things.

"I feel like I'm leading two lives right now." Blair admitted softly. "One where I'm trying to do what's best for Henry and another where I'm trying to figure out what the future holds." She looked up at Dan, holding his gaze. "For us." She removed his hands from her face and sat down on the bed.

He felt helpless. He didn't want to see her in pain. "Look. You don't have to deal with this alone. You_ can't_ deal with this alone." He walked over to her, taking a seat next to her on the bed.

The look on his face was even more serious now. "Blair. I need you to promise me something." Blair looked up at him questioningly, blinking tears away. "From now on, if you go to see Chuck, I want you to tell me. I want to come with you. I don't trust him." Blair nodded tentatively as he wrapped his arm protectively around her, his hand grazing just over the spot where Chuck had roughly grabbed her. She leaned her head against his chest, pressing up against him.

Dan was placated for the moment. God knows they still had things to discuss, but none of that seemed important right now. His hand skimmed down lightly from her arm to her stomach, coming to rest where baby Humphrey lay. He still couldn't believe his child was in there.

If they could ever get through their divorces, at the end it would have all been worth it. She placed her hand over his, playing with his fingers.

"Blair?" He asked quietly, trying to figure out how to broach the subject of the taunting texts he'd been receiving.

"Hmm?"

"Have you...told anyone? I mean besides your mother..."

Blair shook her head. "I'm sure Dorota knows. But that's it. Why? Have you?" She pushed him away, a look of worry creeping over her.

Dan was silent for a moment. He didn't want to freak Blair out any more. Whoever this person was had stalked her to two different restaurants now. She was already completely stressed out. Alerting her to the fact that someone knew their secret would only send her further over the edge. He decided it might be best for now to just keep her in the dark.

He would just have to accompany her wherever she went.

"So um...what are your plans for the rest of the day?" Dan asked, pushing a strand of hair back behind her ear.

Blair sighed. "I'm meeting with my attorney at four. Not really looking forward to it, either."

"I'll come with you." Blair looked at Dan like he was crazy.

"Yeah. Cause _that's_ a good idea."

Dan shrugged. "We can do an early dinner afterwards. I'll just lurk in the shadows." He smiled, leaning in to give her a playful kiss on the neck.

Blair shook her head.

"Humphrey, as much as I would love to have dinner with you, I should probably just wait to eat with Henry. And call me crazy, but I don't think I should really be flaunting you around town right now. Especially in front of my divorce attorney. Something tells me Serena's Dan-cam is live streaming as we speak." Dan knew she was right. He would need to come up with some other way to keep his eye on her. But he meant what he said about Chuck. He didn't want Blair near him alone.

"Well, then take Dorota with you to the meeting. Or, has your mother left town yet?"

"Dan, what's really going on?" she finally asked. He sounded like a lunatic.

"I just think that in light of everything that's happened with Chuck..."

_and the fact that someone is taking stalker-ish pictures of you..._

Blair smiled, amused. She actually didn't mind Dan being so protective. She actually kind of liked it. "It just so happens that my mother decided to stay for a while longer. I guess I could ask her if she wants to accompany me. It would probably make her day."

Dan smiled. If he couldn't escort her, this would be the second best option.

"Any other requests, Mr. Humphrey?" She asked playfully, batting her eyelashes up at him.

Dan pursed his lips together. "Hmm. I can probably think of a couple." He leaned in, placing his mouth against her neck. He pressed her back onto the bed and pushed her hands up over her head, eliciting a giggle.

"You like that don't you?" He teased, taking a nibble of her neck.

"Humphrey!" She squealed. He kissed his way around the side of her cheek and began to aggressively kiss her mouth. "Now," he said, temporarily coming up for air, "we are going to finish what we started last night." She leaned up into him and he settled into her quickly. She began to moan softly as one of Dan's hands stealthily roamed under her dress and up her thigh. In two seconds flat that hand had found the edge of her panties, and was quickly working them down to her knees. As he was unzipping his pants, the sound of the elevator doors opening echoed up the stairs.

"Miss Blair. Mister Henry and I are home!" Dan closed his eyes, a pained look on his face. The sound of Henry repeatedly yelling, "I'm thirsty! I'm thirsty!" wafted up the stairs. Dorota could be heard anxiously trying to placate him. "Just one second, Mister Henry. I get juice now."

'_Of course_.'

Blair sighed, a huge grin on her face. She looked at Dan knowingly and gave him a loving pat on the back.

"And just wait until there are two."

* * *

"Hmm, well this feels familiar." Serena released a satiated breath as she rested her head on Nate's lap. Night had turned into morning which had turned into afternoon and a trip to the market. They now found themselves half naked on the kitchen floor as plans to satisfy their appetite for pancakes had quickly shifted to an appetite for something more carnal.

Nate was starting to think he could get used to this.

"I know what you mean." A smirk found its way to Nate's lips as he playfully caressed his fingers through Serena's golden tresses. His mind drifted briefly to the first time they christened the kitchen floor at the Empire when they dated all those years ago. '_Good times_.'

"It's too bad. I finally managed to stock your fridge with all that delicious food, and we haven't even had the chance to enjoy it." Serena pouted.

"Well, maybe it's because we've been too distracted enjoying _other_ activities." Nate chuckled huskily.

Serena tilted her head up to peer into his eyes, the motion causing him to meet her gaze with lowered lids. "Non-culinary related?" She added suggestively.

She craned her neck to place a warm kiss upon his lips, melting in his embrace as he returned the sentiment with more fervency and passion.

As if on cue, they were interrupted by the sound of someone knocking on his door. Serena whimpered as he broke from the kiss, narrowing his eyes in the direction of the front door. "Are you expecting company?" She whispered as she nibbled on his earlobe.

"No, actually, I'm not." Serena ceased her ministrations giving Nate a moment to slip on his undershirt and inspect the mystery visitor on his porch. He stood up and looked tentatively in the direction of the front door. Serena followed, but hung a few yards behind as she watched him peer through the peep hole. Her face contorted when she saw him recoil as if he was in shock.

"Is everything okay?" Serena questioned carefully.

"Not really." Nate answered with widened eyes.

"Why, what's wrong? Who is it?" Serena rapidly started buttoning up his shirt over her chest for modesty.

"It's Jenny Humphrey."

"Jenny?" Serena quietly shrieked. Taking off like a bat out of hell, Serena made a beeline to hide in Nate's study.

"Wait, where are you-" a confused Nate called out.

"Nate, I can't exactly have my sister-in-law see me here with you!" Serena poked her head out for one last quick announcement. "Get rid of her!" Shutting the door, she held her breath as she heard the front door creak open along with the sound of Jenny excitedly greeting Nate with what she was certain was a hug, judging from his muffled tone.

"Jenny, hey, what are you doing here?" Nate tried his best to sound natural.

"I told you I was coming back to New York to take over Blair's duties at Waldorf Designs while she's on sabbatical." Jenny reminded him as she stepped into the foyer.

Serena wrinkled her brow. Jenny was taking over for Blair?

To Nate's dismay, Jenny was now making herself at home, waltzing in the direction of the kitchen. "Well, I knew that, but I mean what are you doing _here_, at my place? It's a little far from the atelier isn't it?" Nate clarified.

"What? Can't a friend stop by to see another friend on a beautiful, totally not over-scheduled afternoon?" Jenny quipped as she examined Nate's digs with a fashion designer's eye. '_Not bad_.' "I love what you did with the place. Who's your designer? Their sense of color coordination is breathtaking."

Serena could only roll her eyes as she listened from behind the closed door. Was Jenny seriously going to attempt to make small talk? '_Just get to the point and leave already_.'

"Did you really come here just to critique the décor?" Nate arched an eyebrow. He knew when Jenny Humphrey was up to something and at the moment, his spidey senses were tingling.

"No." Jenny smiled sheepishly. "And while it's all simply stunning, I actually came here to ask you a favor." Jenny began.

Jenny studied him for a moment. He seemed to be in a hurry and strangely on edge. Nate Archibald was never on edge. He was always so laid back and easygoing. That is of course, excluding times for when he had something to hide.

"Are you okay?" Jenny scrutinized.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why?" Nate answered brightly.

"I dunno, you're just acting…weird." Jenny tilted her head to study him closer.

"Weird how?" Nate tried his best to conceal his anxiety. It was times like these that he swore Jenny could moonlight as a detective.

"Well, for starters, it's four in the afternoon and you're not dressed." Jenny folded her arms.

"Oh, right." Nate chuckled halfheartedly as he grazed his eyes over his current 'situation.' "Sometimes I like to do my more demanding work from home. It beats having to deal with the high-stress environment of my office, and I can focus better."

"Working from home in your skivvies? Nope. I'm not seriously hating you right now at all." Jenny released an exasperated sigh.

"I take it Eleanor and Blair haven't wasted any time in putting you to work, then?" Nate took this opportunity to change the subject.

"Maybe that's what _they_ call it, but I'm leaning more towards cruel and unusual punishment." Jenny griped.

"That bad, huh?"

"Let's just say my schedule is filled with meetings for the next six months. It's my first day, and I have a stack of paperwork five foot deep on my desk. Not to mention I'm attending the Global Clean Water Crisis Event next weekend, which is actually why I'm here."

Nate looked at her, a confused look on his face.

"As the newly minted head of Waldorf Designs, I want to start off with a bang. Meaning I've probably bitten off more than I can chew," she laughed, "I want to preview our new men's line somewhere high profile. And I figure this fundraiser would be ideal. Lots of business presence, press exposure, Upper East Side big wigs with opinions that matter. You get the idea." Jenny leaned on the kitchen counter, not paying attention as Nate skillfully positioned himself in front of her to block her view of the study where Serena was still hiding.

'_So that's it, then_?' Serena continued to listen in on their conversation from inside Nate's study, being sure to remain as still and quiet as possible.

"Let me guess. You want me to model the new design at the fundraiser."

"You're a quick one, Archibald." Jenny teased, generating a guttural laugh from Nate. "I know you'll be there on behalf of the Spectator, and I'm sure Serena gave you an invite since she's hosting."

"Wait, why would you assume Serena gave me an invite?" Nate was paranoid.

The question mildly threw Jenny off guard. "Umm, because you're her friend and she always gives invites to her friends for any events she hosts?" Jenny explained warily.

"Oh. Right. Of course." There was an awkward moment of silence before Nate decided to speak once more. "Look, I'd be glad to model some new threads for Waldorf Designs. Plus, it takes the stress off of me trying to figure out what to wear."

"Great! Thank you so _so_ much, Nate! You're awesome! I'll just text Melinda and tell her we have our model confirmed." She said excitedly. Jenny pulled out her cell phone and began to send the aforementioned text message.

"So...do you need my sizes or-?"

"Oh it's cool, I had Whitney pull your measurements from your tailor. You're covered. No pun intended, of course." Jenny added with a sly grin which Nate couldn't help but return. He missed her coyness and ingenuity. It always kept him on his toes.

'_What Jenny Humphrey wants, Jenny Humphrey gets._'

Placing her phone back into her purse, her eyes once again surveyed Nate's digs. "Geez, Nate Archibald. The Biltmore Estate has nothing on this place."

"Yeah." He swallowed as she casually walked around, pausing right in front of his study. He tried his best to read her body language from behind without being too suspicious. '_Oh God_.'

"So hey, did Blair tell you how long you'd be taking her place for?" Nate attempted to keep her talking in hopes to distract her away from Serena's hiding spot.

"Nah, I'm pretty much just keeping her seat warm until she's ready to get back in the saddle. It's anyone's guess when that'll be. To be honest, I doubt she'll be able to stay away long. After our meeting today, it's clear she's going to have some trouble relinquishing power." Jenny answered as she turned to face him. "So, is this where you keep it?" She pointed at the study door with a knowing smile.

"_It_?" Nate gulped. What was she talking about?

"Your Xbox!" Jenny exclaimed. "Don't tell me since you got big into politics and The Spectator that you've become a neglectful gamer." She offered him a scolding look.

Nate exhaled in relief. "Sad to say, I haven't even unpacked it since I moved in."

"Tragic. We'll have to remedy that now that I'm back in New York." Jenny smiled playfully.

On the other side of the door, Serena was rolling her eyes.

"You really think you'll have time for video games now that you're taking on the role of sit-in CEO at Waldorf Designs?" Nate queried.

Jenny moved in closer to Nate then, her disposition changing suddenly to something that was eerily familiar. "I can make time." She gazed up at him through hooded lashes, the tone in her voice Nate could swear was slightly sultry. Or maybe he was imagining it.

"Uh, sure. Okay." Nate smiled nervously.

Jenny smiled back at him. "Well, I should get back to the city. I'm sure I have a late night ahead of me. Maybe I'll call you this weekend?"

Nate nodded, giving her another lazy smile as she turned to see herself out.

'_Ugh_.' Jenny may have been able to fool Nate, but Serena knew exactly what she was trying to pull. After all, she practically wrote the book. If she was going to secure Nate's loyalty, she couldn't very well have him distracted with Jenny's advances. Serena smirked. She had some tricks up her sleeve also. She quietly walked to Nate's desk and grabbed her cell phone. Dialing, she waited for her party to answer before turning on her patented Serena van der Woodsen charm. "Hey, Janice," she whispered, "yeah, it's Serena van der Woodsen. Listen, I need to call in an order for the fundraiser. No, I absolutely love my dress, that's not why I'm calling. No, actually, I'm looking for something else. Something in your men's department..."

* * *

Chuck, Jack, and Patrick van Heusen sat in the main conference room at Bass Industries. A secretary brought in three cups of coffee, setting a cup in front of each gentleman. She placed some creamers and sweeteners in the middle of the table before hastily exciting.

Patrick immediately reached for his cup and took an aggressive sip, ready to get down to business. He was excited to have acquired such a high profile client. A _billionaire_ client at that.

"Let me just start by saying that it's an honor to be representing you, Mr. Bass. Lily van der Woodsen told me a week ago that you might be seeking my services. When you didn't call I just assumed you had gone elsewhere." Patrick laughed.

Chuck said nothing, his jaw in a clench. He wasn't in the mood for pleasantries. This was a business meeting. Sensing this, Patrick gulped nervously and took another sip of his coffee.

"Trust me, he's thrilled to have someone with your reputation representing him," Jack piped in dryly, "aren't ya, Chuck?" He smiled at his nephew before turning his attention back to Patrick. "And please. Call him _Chuck_."

Patrick nodded hesitantly. He wasn't easily intimidated, but Chuck was a daunting figure. He had heard all of the eye raising stories about the young business man-including the rumor of how Chuck pushed his own father to his death. Still, there was no way he would ever consider turning down his business.

"Well, Chuck. As I'm sure you already know, Serena is also my client. Being that her husband and your wife were actually committing adultery _with_ each other, I'm already very well versed in the key details of your case. The good news is there's a deluge of evidence to support an affair, and the amount of work I've already put into Serena's case will only stand to benefit yours as well. It won't be hard to persuade a judge to keep your wife's hands away from any and all assets that are in your name and which you brought into the marriage. The pictures from Eleanor Waldorf's New Year's party will see to that."

Chuck glared at Patrick, methodically tapping his fingers on the table. "This isn't about money," Chuck scoffed. "Look around you. I have plenty to spare."

An annoyed Jack spoke up. "It's always about money," he said, correcting his nephew. He turned his chair sideways so he could face Chuck. "Chuck," he whispered under his breath. "We want to keep the monetary damage to a minimum."

"Give her all the money she wants. I don't care," Chuck announced. Jack shook his head and began to pull on his hair, a strained look on his face.

Patrick was confused. People normally sought out his counsel when they were anticipating a long hard fight and when there were obscene amounts of money at stake. Chuck made it sound like there was nothing to settle. The problem with this, though, was Chuck Bass was a billionaire. And since Patrick billed by the hour, he needed this to be a long, drawn out court battle.

Jack cleared his throat and looked back up at Patrick apologetically. "You'll have to excuse my nephew. He just had a little tiff with the wifey. Unfortunately, up until an hour ago, Chuck was under the impression that a reconciliation was still possible." Jack forced a smile, and gave his nephew a pointed look.

Patrick nodded, completely understanding the situation now. "I see. Well, then maybe you want to take some additional time to process everything. We don't have to do this today. Divorce can be a traumatic experience. Just take a little time and we can meet up again next week-" Patrick began to rise up from his chair.

"Sit down." Chuck's words came out cold and hard. With one look he was informing his attorney that this meeting was just starting.

Patrick sat back nervously in his chair. "Okay..."

Jack looked on gleefully, reveling in the fact that Chuck seemed to have found his spine again.

"Blair already informed me she won't be asking for any of my money."

"Are you absolutely sure you can believe her, Chuck? You _were_ married for six years. The court normally takes into consideration what each party brought to the table at the commencement of the marriage, but any property acquired during... your income earned, any assets purchased... it's all up for grabs. She may change her mind and decide that she's entitled-"

"She won't. She's made it clear she doesn't care about all that. And as I said earlier, I'm not concerned about it anyway." Jack clenched his fist. His nephew was being a little to cavalier about the money aspect of this.

"Alright," Patrick said hesitantly as he scribbled down a few notes. "Well, then I guess that leaves the topic of custody of your son." Chuck suddenly sat up at attention. It was the most interest he'd shown the entire meeting. And Patrick now realized how he was going to be earning his money.

He decided to test the waters a bit. "I can only assume, seeing that you both seem to have already _easily_ settled on property and assets, that we'll be filing for a joint custody agreement?"

There was a bit of a pause, and Jack and Chuck looked at each other. Jack then gestured to Patrick, prodding Chuck to tell his attorney exactly what he wanted.

"Not exactly. I want full custody of my son."

Patrick leaned in over the table, trying his best to repress a smile. This is what he lived for.

"I have to be honest with you, Chuck. That's going to be almost impossible."

'_Impossible_ _for anyone else.'_

"To even have a shot at full custody, you're going to have to prove that Blair is an unfit mother. That she's a detriment to her child. And Henry may have to testify. Are you prepared to put your son through that?"

"There's nothing I won't do for my son. And I truly believe that right now he's better off with me." Chuck said firmly. Patrick nodded.

"Okay. But we're going to need something a little stronger than 'what you believe.' And unfortunately adultery isn't always synonymous with being a bad parent. We're going to need something far more tangible." He took a sip of his coffee.

Chuck said nothing, choosing to look out the window. He seemed conflicted about something. Jack impatiently spoke up.

"Blair had a little incident on Christmas Day. Public intoxication at the Plaza. Palm Court. Henry was there. Lots of witnesses. I'm sure there were cameras." He explained. Patrick quickly jotted down the information. "Anything else?"

Chuck nodded hesitantly, suddenly not feeling so great about the tactics he was using. But there was no holding back now. If he wanted his son, this was how it was going to have to be. "Eleanor. Her mother. On New Year's she spoke to me about hospitalizing her for her erratic behavior." Patrick couldn't believe it. He had just hit the jackpot.

"So you're saying that her own mother might support this decision?" Chuck shook his head. "Doubtful. But the point is her own mother saw her as unstable. That has to account for something, right?" Patrick continued to write notes and nodded his head.

"Potentially..." Patrick responded, not as confident as he had been earlier. Chuck leaned across the table, glaring at his attorney. Patrick could feel a bead of sweat forming on his forehead. "You might as well tell me now if you're not going to be up to the job. There's no sense in me wasting my time." Patrick bit his tongue. He often had to bite his tongue with his clients. It was the price he had to pay for making his money off of Manhattan's elite.

Jack gave an amused smile and patted Chuck calmly on the back. "Let's just let the man see what he can do, Chuck. Okay?" Chuck said nothing as he continued to glare in Patrick's direction.

"Well, I think I have plenty of information to get started with," Patrick announced a bit uncomfortably. "Is there any other business you need to discuss with me, Chuck?"

Chuck wasted no time.

"I want a restraining order filed. Against Dan Humphrey. I don't want him anywhere near my son." Patrick's jaw dropped. This case just got even more interesting. "Well, there's a judge who owes me a favor. I'll have to make a call. And it will definitely require some questioning of your son." He paused for a moment to make sure Chuck was still on board. "And you're sure you want to do this?"

Jack sat back in his chair, placing his hands behind his head, completely entertained. Chuck nodded.

Patrick picked up his phone. "Alright Chuck. Where exactly is your son right now?"

* * *

Standing outside of Sant Ambroeus, Georgina took her mini binoculars out of her bag as she shoved a random pedestrian out of her sight line. She took a quick peek across the street, watching as Blair, Eleanor, and Randall Kinmont sat down at a table. She could hardly contain herself at the revelation of Blair's pregnancy. Torturing Humphrey was fun, but even that would eventually get old. She wanted to be able to share her delicious information with someone other than Phillip and Milo.

She needed to expand her horizons and find a way to personally benefit from the information that had practically fallen into her lap.

Georgina took a moment to shoot off a text to Phillip. _"Will be very late. Don't wait up."_ She followed that up with another text to Jack. _"It's six am down under. Just missing my man."_ She then attached a stock picture of herself, posing provocatively and winking at the camera. She rolled her eyes at this before shoving her phone back into her purse. The things she had to do to maintain a lifestyle.

She held up her binoculars again, focusing her attention back on Blair.

"Nice to finally meet you, Blair. Cyrus and I go way back. He's always bragging about you." Randall Kinmont was an older gentleman in his early sixties with a warm disposition. "I'm very sorry that you are having to go through this. I'm going to do my best to try and make everything as painless for you as possible."

"That's precisely what we wanted to hear, right Blair?" Eleanor said between sips of tea.

"That's right, Mother," Blair said as she fidgeted in her seat. Why had she told Humphrey she would bring her mother to this meeting? Of course Eleanor had been thrilled when Blair had requested her to join them.

"So, I've gotten a little background on the situation from Cyrus. Of course there are some things in play that could potentially cause some bumps. Have you spoken to your husband yet about who's going to petition?" Blair reached for her water.

"I'm petitioning." She said simply, without elaborating further.

"And have you discussed any other matters? Division of assets, property, custody..."

Eleanor raised an eyebrow and looked at her daughter. "Yes, Blair. Have you two _discussed_ those things?" Blair moved her fork around on the table, taking a moment to gather her thoughts.

"I told Chuck I didn't want anything from him. And that I would be seeking joint custody of Henry."

Randall furrowed his brow. "And he was amenable to that?"

Blair said nothing as she stared into her glass of water. Eleanor cocked her head to one side. "Blair? Will you please answer the man?"

"No. Not really," Blair finally said, sighing.

"Not really what?" Eleanor snapped.

"He's not really amenable, Mother!"

An exasperated Eleanor set down her tea cup. "I thought you were sure he wasn't going to cause a fuss, Blair! That he wouldn't contest!"

"Well, that's what I thought! But I guess I was wrong. Are you happy now? Looks like you were right!"

Randall realized he needed to intervene between mother and daughter before things escalated further.

"It's okay. That's okay. That's why I'm here," Randall said comfortingly, giving a grandfatherly smile. Blair covered her eyes as Eleanor shook her head.

"We'll just start by filing and go from there." Blair nodded. "So just to confirm, we are seeking joint custody and are only asking for any assets you brought into the marriage."

Eleanor sat up in her chair.

"I think she needs to rethink that strategy, Randall. She's entitled to more than what she just brought into the marriage." She added, wildly gesturing with her hands. "And Henry needs to be in a stable home. _One_ stable home. And that home is not with Charles Bass."

"Well it's not your decision, Mother." Blair was quickly losing patience. Randall shot her an understanding look before turning his attention on Eleanor.

"Well, as you know, Eleanor, that might be a little easier said than done in light of the circumstances." He then turned to Blair. "Blair, I don't make it a habit to read 'Page Six,' nor do I regularly check 'New York Social Diary,' but even I know about your relationship with Daniel Humphrey."

Blair looked up meekly, biting her lip. "Because you're the one initiating the divorce, and unless you can prove that Charles Bass also had an extramarital affair or treated you with extreme cruelty..."

"He tried to run off with her child," Eleanor huffed, still agitated by the incident. "He took off with Henry on New Year's Day."

Randall sat up, curious. "Were charges filed?"

"No," Blair replied softly.

"That was the same day you ran off with Mr. Humphrey, though, wasn't it?" Randall asked, leading her.

"Yes," Blair confirmed.

"And what difference does that make?" Eleanor scoffed.

Randall cleared his throat. "Eleanor, I know you don't want to hear this, but what Blair is asking for is pretty much on par with what she _should_ be asking for. Even if Chuck was attempting to flee with the child, there's no record of it. From a judge's standpoint, it will look like back pedaling if you try to file something against him at this point." He paused to take a sip of water, and then continued. "Because it's Blair's decision to end the marriage, and because she's the one who had the extramarital affair, she'll come off much more sympathetically if she keeps her requests within reason. Additionally, the more you ask for, the more dragged out the whole process becomes."

"I told you," Blair whispered to Eleanor under her breath. She turned to face her attorney. "In my defense, Mr. Kinmont, I'm actually not the only one who has had an extramarital affair. Chuck has actually had several."

Eleanor slowly turned to face her daughter. She looked like she'd been hit with a two by four. "Blair! How could you not have told me this?"

"Because it was none of your business, Mother!"

"I believe I have a right to know if someone has intentionally hurt my daughter," she scoffed. "How long has it been going on? And with whom? I want names." Eleanor was even more appalled at Chuck now than when she found out he had kidnapped Henry. "I am going to kill that son of a bitch!" Randall cringed at her choice of words.

"No one is killing anyone, Mother!"

"I told you that you need to seek full custody, Blair. And honestly, now I think you also need to drain him dry!"

"I don't have _time_ to do that, Mother," Blair said, gritting her teeth and glaring at her. Randall found the comment to be a curious one as he once again found himself caught smack in the middle of Eleanor and Blair's squabble. "Blair," Randall interrupted. "Do you have proof of these extramarital affairs?"

"Well. In the past..." Blair began hesitantly. "I've found some things. Women's undergarments in his suitcase. Lipstick on the collar of some of his dress shirts." Eleanor tried to focus on her tea cup. It was everything she could do to keep her mouth shut. "And Henry told me about meeting certain women on trips he's taken with Chuck. One of whom he had a previous relationship with before we were married," Blair explained.

In his thirty-eight years of practicing law, Randall Kinmont had heard it all. This scenario was pretty much par for the course. "Well, that certainly could change the complexion of things. It probably wouldn't be too difficult to collect some more tangible proof if he's been as promiscuous as you say. We can put it before a judge. That is, if that's what you want to do." Blair bit her lip for a second. Eleanor was audibly sighing next to her.

"No. No. I don't want to prolong things. I want everything over as quickly as possible." Randall nodded, obviously agreeing with her decision. "Well, an uncontested divorce can take three months, maybe longer. If we find your husband still won't agree to it, then we can always file a new petition. Play a little dirtier if we have to. Unfortunately, it all depends on him right now." Blair exhaled. That wasn't what she wanted to hear.

"I should have the petition filed fairly quickly," he added. "So just sit tight." Randall looked down for a moment, as if something just occurred to him.

"Blair, it's always uncomfortable having to broach this topic with my clients. You're an adult, and our relationship is a professional one, of course. But, in my profession, you sometimes have to give personal advice as well." Blair could feel her stomach start to twist into a knots. She knew where this was headed.

"What are you trying to say, Randall?" Eleanor asked impatiently.

"I'm saying you need to keep your distance from Daniel Humphrey. A judge wants to see you focusing on your son. Not on your new relationship." Blair exchanged a look with her mother. She wasn't sure how exactly she could accomplish that. At the very least they could go underground. There had to be some place in this town where they could go off the radar.

"Okay," she said, trying to sound as convincing at possible. The conversation was interrupted by the ringing of Blair's cell phone. She frowned. It was Dorota.

"Dorota, this is really not a good time!"

"But, Miss Blair," Dorota whispered. "Mister Chuck and Uncle are here. And another very tall man. They take Mister Henry in dining room and ask him questions." Blair sunk into her chair. Her face turned pale and she was sure she was going to throw up. "Oh my God, I'm on my way."

"Darling? What is going on?" a concerned Eleanor asked.

"It's...it's Chuck. He's over at the penthouse with Jack and another man. Sounds like it's his attorney. Dorota says they're asking Henry questions." Blair wanted to cry, but she fought off the feeling as she grabbed her purse and coat.

"I'm calling the car around," Eleanor added, following suit and grabbing her coat and purse. She placed her arm around her daughter. Randall followed right behind them. As typical with Upper East Side divorces, this case had already taken a dramatic turn.

Outside of the restaurant, Georgina watched in confusion as Blair, Eleanor, and Randall all frantically made their way into the town car and zoomed away.

* * *

Rufus slammed the phone down. Doug Collier, his regular go-to divorce attorney had just turned down Dan's case, claiming he didn't have the time right now to take on another client. He offered Rufus another suggestion, however. His twenty-five year old niece and recent law school grad Megan.

A livid Rufus dialed Lily's number. She immediately answered. "Oh, hello Rufus. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"You are completely out of line, Lily! Do you honestly have nothing better to do with your time than blackball Dan to every attorney in town?" There was a short pause.

"Well, I honestly wish I knew what you were talking about, Rufus. I can assure you, I have nothing to do with it, though. If no one is taking Dan on as a client, there's a good reason for it. My daughter is beloved in this town and Dan humiliated her. He's only getting what he deserves. Now if you don't mind, I'm in the middle of an organic lavender body scrub. You really should try it, Rufus. They put you in this wooden tub-"

"Lily, we both know damn well this isn't about Dan. This is about you and me. You're still holding a grudge after all these years!"

Lily stymied a laugh. "And that's where you're wrong. I made my peace with you a long time ago, Rufus. Our children were married. I came to your damn wedding up at Woodstock to that 'singer.' Which by the way, lasted what? A year? This is about what _your_ son did to _my_ daughter."

"Then it needs to stay between them, Lil. They're adults. You're acting just like your mother used to." Rufus looked up to see Dan coming through the door, a concerned look on his face.

"And now I know I should have listened to her!" Lily screamed into the phone before hanging up. Rufus shook his head. That woman was a piece of work. No wonder Scott never came to visit.

Dan had a seat at the kitchen island. He was feeling a lot better having made up with Blair, even if he did have to leave through the back stairwell so Henry wouldn't see him.

"Ah, I have some bad news, son." Dan made a face. Just when things seemed to be getting back on track...

"Oh, God. What?"

"Doug can't take your case. It would seem he's...'booked up' for the foreseeable future."

"Really?" Dan asked. "But I thought you said-" Rufus nodded regretfully.

"The good news is he's got a niece." Dan wasn't following.

"Who...just passed the Bar last month." Now Dan was following.

"Her name's Megan Collier. You'd be her first client. Ever." Rufus forced a smile.

Dan wasn't sure what to think. "Okay, well I guess having any kind of attorney is better than having none. Megan...it isn't the most intimidating name in the world, though, is it?" Rufus gave him a sympathetic look.

"We can keep looking, Dan. Tell me how your meeting was with your publisher?"

"Um...good," Dan lied. The last thing he wanted to hear was disappointment in his father's voice for skipping an important meeting to check on Blair. "Book should be released by summer."

"That's terrific, son!" Rufus stood up from his place on the couch. "I didn't get to the gnocchi," he confessed, "Jenny's working late. Why don't we just go out? Celebrate your finished book?" Rufus suggested.

"Sounds good." The truth was that he was starving. He hadn't eaten since the eggs Benedict that morning.

Dan heard the chime of a text message coming through. He quickly checked his phone, expecting it to be an update from Blair on her meeting with her attorney. Instead he saw a picture of Blair, Eleanor, and presumably Blair's lawyer running frantically out of Sant Ambroeus. It was accompanied by the following message:

_"Where's the fire, Blair?"_

"Everything okay?" Rufus asked, noticing his son's demeanor had completely changed. Dan tried to smile, but in the pit of his stomach he knew. Everything was definitely _not_ okay. And it had Chuck's name written all over it.

* * *

Blair was barely holding it together when she returned to the penthouse. Randall and Eleanor were following closely behind her.

"I am so sorry, Miss Blair. Miss Eleanor." Dorota was visibly upset. "Chuck and others leave a few minutes ago. Mister Henry upstairs now." Blair nodded, relieved to know that at least Chuck hadn't taken him. "I tell him we make cookies later. And I bring you chamomile tea." Dorota abruptly turned and exited toward the kitchen, thankful that she was no longer having to deal with the situation alone.

"So Chuck seems to be working fast. Any idea who his attorney might be?" Randall asked. A stunned Blair shook her head. He gave her a comforting look. "I'm just going to make some phone calls. See what I can find out."

"Thank you, Randall," Eleanor said gratefully as Randall excused himself to the living room.

"I'm just going to go up and check on him," Blair said. Eleanor watched solemnly as her daughter slowly ascended the stairs. Her decision to stay in town had been a wise one after all.

Blair climbed to the top of the stairs and carefully opened the door to see Henry sitting on the floor, playing with his dinosaurs.

"Henry?" She forced a smile, trying to stay as calm as possible. She walked over to sit on the bed. "You love that T-Rex don't you?" He looked up and silently nodded at her. "So I understand Daddy was just here?"

Henry nodded his head yes as he marched his T-Rex along the carpet. Blair hated interrogating her son.

"Can you come sit by Mommy for a minute?" She patted the seat next to her on the bed. Something in Blair's voice must have tipped him off as to what the conversation was going to entail. He hesitated for a moment before finally standing up and having a seat next to her.

"A man with Daddy was asking me a lot of questions about you."

Blair did her best to act natural. "Oh? About me? What...what kinds of questions?"

"He asked if you had a man friend come over here sometimes and if his name was Dan." Blair ran her fingers through her son's hair, comfortingly him. "And he asked if he slept here."

"Oh he did?" She asked, struggling to keep her cool. "And sweetheart...what exactly did you tell him?" She could feel a lump forming in her throat.

"Yes and I said I think so 'cause last night he was in your room." Blair tried to refrain from making any facial expressions, but she wanted to kick herself. "Oh, he wasn't sleeping over, sweetie," she assured him. "Dan's just a friend." She waited to see if that would elicit any reaction from him, but he just looked up at her, wide eyed. "So...that, that was everything you told the man?" Blair asked hesitantly. Henry shook his head.

"I also said I couldn't go to the bathroom because your door was locked but then when it was unlocked I saw Dan kissing you on your neck and he was taking off your clothes."

Blair's mouth fell open. There were a million different thoughts going through her head, not one of them good. Chuck was officially gunning for her and Dan. Hard. She swallowed. "That's not what..." Blair closed her eyes. There was no point in trying to convince him. Her child wasn't stupid. She had made her bed. "And anything else?"

"I said that you yelled at him and told him to get out."

'_Of course.' _

Blair took a deep breath. That last bit of information he gave Chuck and his attorney may have unintentionally helped her. Maybe he would think they'd broken up? "Okay. Um. Why don't you go and wash your hands? Dorota will have dinner ready soon." Henry bobbed up from the bed.

"Is Daddy coming back for dinner?"

"No."

Henry frowned, but surprisingly didn't seem too disappointed as he marched into the bathroom. She waited until she could hear the water running, and then stepped outside the bedroom door with her phone. This was worse than she ever could have imagined and at that moment, she knew she had to take proactive measures. Randall was right. She needed to think about her son. Blair was dazed but focused, and she knew what she needed to do.

She hastily dialed Dan's number and he answered immediately.

Before she could say anything, he spoke first. "Are you okay?" He asked frantically, the picture of Blair, Eleanor, and her attorney jumping in a car still etched in his brain. He and Rufus had just sat down in a booth at a diner around the corner from the loft.

There was a long uncomfortable pause.

"No. I'm not fine, Dan," she said softly. Her voice was breaking as she wiped away a tear. "I'm not..."

"Blair-"

"I love you, but I don't want you contacting me. My focus needs to be on Henry."

"What happened? What do you mean don't contact you? Blair, what's going on?" Dan felt like he'd been punched in the gut. Just a couple of hours ago they were rolling around on her bed like a couple of horny teenagers.

"Please, Dan. I can't-"

"Tell me, Blair," Dan pleaded as Rufus looked on, a look of concern growing on his father's face.

"Just please. Don't call me and don't come here, okay? I have to go. I'm sorry." She hung up just as Henry was walking out of the bedroom.

"Mommy?" he questioned. "Why are you sad?" She kneeled down and hugged him tightly. "I'm not sad. I love you so much, do you know that? I love you more than anything else in this world." The tears were falling in buckets now as Blair squeezed him tighter. She could feel his little arms encircling her, embracing her back.

"I love you, Mommy."

* * *

In the Bass Industries boardroom, Chuck was pacing as Jack sipped on a Scotch and checked his cell phone for missed texts and emails. He smirked as he came across a suggestive photo that Georgina had recently sent to him.

"It's a done deal," Patrick said excitedly, hanging up his phone. "Judge Hoskins went ahead and issued the restraining order for Dan Humphrey. It should be delivered to him in the morning."

Chuck was pleased, even if he wasn't going to come right out and say so. If he wasn't completely sure that going for full custody of his son was the right thing to do before, he was completely convinced of it now. From the sound of it, Blair was fucking Humphrey with their son only a few feet away. What kind of parent did that? He did take some glee in the fact that apparently Dan and Blair had argued after Henry interrupted them, though.

Patrick stood up from the table. "Alright. Now I need to get to work on filing the petition." He walked around to shake Chuck's hand. "Chuck. I'll be in touch." He nodded a goodbye to Jack before leaving the conference room, an added spring in his step. Chuck had a seat at the table, running his fingers through his hair. He wondered how long he would have to wait for Blair to call and rip him a new one as he leaned back in his chair. It had been a long day and all he could think about was getting a good night's sleep.

Chuck looked up at Jack, who was still entertaining himself with his cell phone.

"Something funny?" Jack nodded at his nephew, and then held the phone out for Chuck to see the picture of Georgina. Chuck gave an amused look and managed a small laugh.

"At least someone's marriage isn't crumbling."

"She's a minx I tell ya. Probably need to go call her, actually." Jack started to make his way out of the room, but before he could leave, Chuck called him back.

"Wait, Jack." Jack turned around curiously. Chuck stood up and walked over to him, a sincere look on his face.

"Yeah?"

"I just...I wanted to say thank you. For getting me through this. I just never thought Blair would do something like this to me." Jack was almost touched. _Almost._ His nephew actually looked like he was going to cry.

"It's nothing. We're blood. That's what we do." He paused and pointed to the glass of Scotch sitting in front of Chuck. "Now stop being a pansy and drink the rest of that. When I get back we're hitting up The Boom Boom Room to celebrate." Chuck smiled and did what he was told.

Jack walked outside of the office and into the hallway near the elevator banks, checking around to make sure there was no one within earshot before dialing.

"Rich? Pop open a bottle of your finest, because Hong Kong just closed. You and I are going to have the largest luxury hotel in Asia."

Just around the corner, Georgina was uncomfortably wedged between a chair and a large potted plant, holding her phone up in the air and trying to record what she could of Jack's conversation.

"Naw. He knows nothing. He's too caught up in his divorce drama," Jack said in a condescending tone. "Which works for me. More cash for the two of us."

Georgina's eyes were as big as saucers. And they grew even bigger when her phone suddenly started ringing. She frantically rushed to turn the volume down, but it was too late. Jack's footsteps were now making their way down the marble hallway.

_Clip clap. Clip clap._

"Let me call you back, Rich." Managing to finally turn her phone off, Georgina hunched down into a ball as tightly as she could. The footsteps were coming closer and closer. She tightly closed her eyes and held her breath. After roughly a minute, she heard Jack walk back down the hall. She then heard the door to the office open and shut behind him. Georgina exhaled with relief.

_Too close._

Seeing a window of opportunity, Georgina quickly made her escape, racing to the elevator. She pressed the button furiously and looked around, hoping _she_ could catch one before someone caught _her_. Luckily, an elevator quickly arrived and she hopped on, heaving a sigh of relief as the doors closed shut.

_Clip clap. Clip clap._

From just around the corner, Jack emerged from the shadows...and watched as the elevator doors closed.

* * *

Blair, Eleanor, and Randall were seated in the living room while Dorota fed Henry in the dining room. After her crying spell, Blair had washed her face and reapplied her makeup, but she still looked red and blotchy. For once, Eleanor didn't comment on her appearance.

"Blair, it looks like Chuck's attorney is Patrick van Heusen." She cringed at the sound of the renowned money grubber's name. She knew from Dan that he was representing Serena as well.

"I've had my secretary send off a cease and desist letter to his office. He's not to come here or speak to your son again without court approval." Blair was relieved to hear it, but unfortunately the damage was already done.

"Van Heusen is a piece of work. But, if we have anything going for us, it's that he tends to rub a lot of judges the wrong way."

"I still can't believe they just came barging up in here to harass my grandchild," Eleanor huffed. "Blair, did you find out what they asked him?"

Blair looked up hesitantly. Eleanor and Randall's eyes were completely locked on her. "Um...they were asking questions about Dan," she admitted. There was no way she was going to get any more specific than that. Of course they could probably read between the lines.

Eleanor rolled her eyes. "Of course."

"That's why it's imperative that you stay away from him-" Randall started to say.

"I know!" She snapped, having heard enough preaching for one day. All she could think about was how hurt Dan sounded on the phone. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"Perfectly understandable, Blair."

"It's just...I mean it's already taken care of."

Randall nodded as he stood up. "I know this is stressful, Blair. Try not to think about it. Distract yourself. Go to work. Take care of your son. Try to maintain some normalcy for his sake. And let me know if Chuck or his attorney try to contact you. Whatever you do, do not contact them. I don't want you speaking to either of them, just refer them to me. In light of recent events, I'm going to file a motion to try and get full temporary custody until things settle down. Three grown men coming into a residence they have no business being in and questioning a five year old just doesn't sit well with me."

Eleanor stood up to walk him out. "Thank you, Randall. You don't know what a comfort it is to have you on our side." He turned back to Blair one more time. "I'll call you in the morning. Let you know where we stand." He gave his standard comforting smile.

Blair watched the two of them walk off toward the elevator. She was suddenly left alone to reflect on the day's events. It was all coming to a head.

Henry.

Dan.

Chuck.

She clutched her stomach, suddenly overcome with that familiar sensation she'd been battling for the past week. She'd somehow fought it off all day, but there was no putting it off any longer. Blair stood up from the couch and ran in the direction of the stairs.

His curiosity piqued, Randall watched as she bounded up the steps. An uncomfortable Eleanor smiled at him, and then bowed her head.

* * *

"I'm home! Finally!" Jenny announced as she opened the door to the loft. It was just after midnight, and she was literally ready to drop, still trying to adjust to Eastern time. After having left the atelier mid-afternoon and saying she would soon return, Eleanor had never made it back. And Blair never returned after her lunch date. Jenny wasn't complaining, though. It had given her the opportunity to run and see Nate. And to flex her muscle a bit. She was already making an impression on the staff and that was a good thing. Just because her last name wasn't Waldorf didn't mean she was someone to be trifled with.

Rufus looked up from the book he was reading. "How was your first day?" he asked, trying to infuse some excitement into his words. It didn't work. Jenny could immediately tell something was wrong.

"It was good," Jenny responded dubiously. Rufus smiled, pleased to hear that someone was having a good day.

"What's wrong, Dad?"

Rufus set his book down on the table. "Blair called Dan earlier. Apparently it wasn't a very positive conversation. He wouldn't tell me what she said, but he's been pretty down about it since this afternoon. Holed up in his old bedroom."

"Well, should I go talk to him?" Jenny queried.

"You can try. I doubt you'll get anything out of him, though. You know how he gets." Jenny took a deep breath and headed for Dan's room. She slowly cracked open the door. He was lying on his bed, his hands behind his head, staring at the ceiling.

"What is it Jenny?" He asked sternly, not even bothering to look at her.

"Um...can I come in?" She asked quietly.

"Well you're probably going to barge in anyway so..."

She smiled. "And you'd be right!" Jenny peeled off her Marc Jacobs wedges and had a seat next to her brother on the bed.

"What's wrong, Dan? I know it's about Blair."

Dan pursed his lips together and shook his head. "I have no idea how I got myself into this mess. I'm sure I deserve it, though. Payback for starting Gossip Girl. I am definitely being punished for it now." Jenny sighed. Could he be anymore melodramatic?

Jenny tried again. "What exactly did Blair say?"

"Oh, just that she doesn't want to see me. She doesn't want me calling her. She doesn't want me contacting her by any means at all." Jenny shook her head. Blair could be such a bitch. Somehow she just knew it would end up like this. It appeared that Blair had once again used Dan to get through a rough patch and tossed him away like a used Kleenex.

"I'm sorry, Dan. She doesn't deserve you. She's always been selfish. That's just who she is." Dan cut his eyes at his sister, prompting her to stop insulting the woman he was in love with.

"That's _not _who she is..."

"Geez. Sorry. Just trying to support you. Sue me."

He eyed her closely. "Have you been messing with me?" He suddenly blurted out. "Have you been trying to cause a rift between Blair and me?"

Jenny cocked her head back, offended. "What do you mean 'messing with you?' I always mess with you. I'm your sister. But I would never purposely try to sabotage your relationship. How could you even think that?" Dan angrily retrieved his phone out of his pocket and showed her the picture of Chuck grabbing Blair.

_"_Did you send me this?_"_ He asked accusingly, sitting up straight. She squinted in order to survey the photo.

"That's Chuck and Blair," she announced.

"Thank you," he replied sarcastically. "I know who it is. Why did you send this to me?"

Jenny huffed. "I didn't send it to you! I didn't send you anything. What the hell are you talking about, Dan?"

And with that response, Dan knew he was accusing the wrong person. He thought if he could figure out who was harassing him, he could regain some control over at least part of his life. But he was barking up the wrong tree. He would have to continue to suffer-in more ways than one. Dan shook his head and lay his head back onto the pillow. Jenny curled up beside him. "I'm sorry, Dan," Jenny said softly.

"No, I'm sorry. Sorry," he muttered.

They lay in silence for a good two minutes until Dan couldn't take it anymore. He needed to confide in someone. He shot up and Jenny looked at him questioningly.

"What, Dan?"

"You can't tell, Dad. You can't tell anyone." Jenny's curiosity was instantly piqued.

"I won't. I promise."

Dan took a deep breath. "That picture of Chuck and Blair isn't the only one I've received. Someone is harassing me. Taunting me. And apparently mocking me with her own blend of Gossip Girl snark." Dan scrolled down to show her another photo of Blair, Chuck, and Henry at dinner. Jenny gave Dan a look.

"Well, obviously it's Chuck sending you these texts. Who else could it be?"

"Well, that's what I originally thought. But why would he arrange to send a picture to me where he's getting physical with her? That would be a bit counterintuitive, don't you think?"

"Well, maybe he accidentally sent the wrong shot," Jenny joked. Dan wasn't amused.

"It's not Chuck. Because Chuck doesn't know about this." Dan scrolled through the messages on his phone to find the stork text. He paused for a moment. If he showed Jenny this text, there would be no turning back. He took a breath and held up the phone. She once again squinted as he held the phone up to her face.

She read the message aloud. "Congrats? Why congrats?"

"Because whoever this is knows..."

Jenny gave her brother a confused look. She still wasn't following. "Knows what?" She asked, nearly on the edge of her seat.

"Knows she's pregnant, Jenny. Blair...is pregnant." Jenny nearly fell off the bed as she tried to keep from hyperventilating.

"Oh my God. Dan!" It all made sense now. Blair stepping away from Waldorf Designs. Her questioning how much information she and Dan shared with each other. She was checking to see if Jenny knew about the pregnancy.

"I have no idea what to do, Jenny. We're having a child together and I can't even see her? I know it's because of Henry, but still..." A stunned Jenny gave her big brother a comforting pat on the back. She was still trying to catch her breath and process the information.

"I can't believe this, Dan. Well I'm sure Blair's just reacting out of fear. She's just scared. First a divorce. Then an unplanned pregnancy..."

"Yeah, I'm sure her attorney's the one who told her to cease communication with me. It's logical. But something happened today." He scrolled down and showed her the photo of a stressed out Blair, Eleanor, and her attorney jumping in a town car. "Something happened. Chuck did something. I just. I need to talk to her. But there's no point in calling. She made it clear she won't be answering."

Jenny suddenly had a thought. "Um...well, if you want to see Blair and she won't answer your calls or texts, how about staging a run in? At an event? That I'm attending ...and where I can bring a guest?"

Dan suddenly perked up. "What do you mean? What kind of event? When is it?"

"You're going to need a tux. It's for the Global Clean Water fundraiser next weekend. Fashion Night at the Frick. Blair will definitely be there. And as my brother, it only makes sense that you'd want to be there to support me as I preview my new men's line." She refrained from saying exactly _how_ she would be previewing the line, though she wanted to tell the world it was Nate Archibald!

Dan made a face. "But it's not until next weekend?" Jenny rolled her eyes. "Beggars can't be choosers, Dan. Do you want to see the mother of your child or not?" Dan exhaled. "Fine," he agreed. Jenny smiled brightly. It was just so Shakespearean.

"Alright then. The next two weeks will be tough, but just sit tight and your patience will be rewarded. I'm sure you'll find some way to distract yourself." Jenny looked around the room and smiled. Her hand began to inconspicuously make its way underneath Dan's mattress.

"Oh. What have we here?" She asked teasingly as she pulled out a copy of Fatherhood: You Can't Do It Over. She reached under and pulled out another book: My Boys Can Swim. Jenny choked back a laugh as she reached underneath the mattress once more and pulled out Pregnancy: Day By Day, and From Here to Paternity.

"Jesus, Dan! Did you leave any books for the other expectant fathers?" She quipped.

"Give me those," Dan said, roughly yanking them from her grip. Jenny observed him. She liked to give him a hard time but she knew when to stop. He placed the books over on the nightstand.

"I'm sorry," she said sincerely, "It's just...I just can't believe it." Jenny sighed softly. "I'm going to be an aunt. Dad is going to be a grandpa!" She laughed as she watched a semblance of a smile curl over Dan's lips. Jenny leaned over to give him the biggest hug she could muster.

"And you're going to be a great dad."

* * *

AN: Thanks to everyone who continues to follow "The Cheaters." Jai (aka VampSlaying101 aka my awesome Beta) and I are having a great time with it. I know it seems like Dan is getting dumped on a lot now (and he is) but don't fret. I'm sure it will all work out ;)

Thanks again for all of the lovely reviews (and even the not so lovely). They really are appreciated!

Erin


	17. Chapter 17

**Sorry about the long hiatus. Please let me make it up to you with this extra long chapter. And for those lamenting the lack of Dan and Blair in the last chapter, I think this should make up for it. FYI, there's an approximate two week time jump here.**

**Warning: Adult content ahead. If that's not your thing, please don't read! Though if you've read this far ;) it probably is. Enjoy.**

* * *

**Chapter 17**

It was official. Dan had lost all patience with his book agent's new assistant. After two of the most torturous weeks in recent memory, personally and professionally, this was just the cherry on top of the sundae.

There was one small glimmer, however. He hadn't received anymore taunting texts from his mystery stalker.

"No, it's Humphrey. _H-u-m-p-h-r-e-y_!"

Dan had spoken to Marco very briefly after sending over his final chapter-the day after he had gone running to check on Blair and was forced to cancel his meeting at the last minute. And now he was being punished for it. Dan still hadn't heard anything back and Carrie, his editor at Random House, wasn't returning his calls, either.

There was also the matter of a little restraining order he'd received last week informing him to stay at least a hundred yards away from a certain billionaire's son _at all times_. Dan tried to tell himself that he wasn't offended. That he was more than happy to keep his distance from the littlest _Bass_tard. But the truth was that it hurt. It was a classic, cheap, dirty, Chuck Bass maneuver. And Blair, who surely knew about it, hadn't even reached out to him to denounce Chuck's dirty tactics whatsoever. Was it too much to ask for her to show at least some empathy over what Chuck had done?

So now Dan was taking out every last drop of frustration on a poor, lowly assistant.

"I really find it hard to believe there are no notes at all!"

"Well, I'm looking around Marco's desk..." Dan could hear the sound of papers shuffling and a basket of paperclips toppling over. "...and I don't see any notes with your name." The assistant replied nervously.

"Just have Marco call me when he gets in, okay!?" Dan huffed as he hung up the phone. First no lawyers were returning his calls, including Megan-who he was led to believe was a sure thing. Now his own agent and editor were ignoring him. It couldn't be a coincidence. This had Chuck Bass's name written all over it. Or possibly Lily's. Or perhaps it was Serena's.

It was incredibly hard to tell these days. If there was ever a time for some herbal relief, certainly this was it.

Of course Rufus and "Panic" had smoked it all. If Dan's life was going to keep spiraling in this direction, it was going to require another hookup from Nate. Unfortunately, work was apparently keeping him chained to his desk and he, like the others, wasn't returning Dan's calls either. Dan had initially called Nate last week to see if he was up for that dinner they had discussed-he really needed to hammer the man down for some support and get him up to speed on Serena and her attorney's mission to search and destroy. In other words, Nate would probably have to testify to having a relationship with his wife. Dan tried again a few days later. Once again Nate declined. Something had suddenly 'come up,' he explained, but Nate promised he'd call him back later in the week.

Nate's call never came.

It was just as well, because at this point Dan had no lawyer to give a deposition to anyway.

But his luck was about to change.

Dan was just about to try Nate's number again when his phone rang. It was a number he didn't recognize.

"Uh, hello?" Dan answered tentatively.

"Dan Humphrey?" An overly excited female voice replied from the other end of the line.

"Um...yeah?"

Dan could hear her clearing her throat. "It's Megan!" She announced, as if they were old friends.

'_Megan. Megan? Oh...Megan!'_

"Oh, right." Dan tried to play it cool, but inside he was sighing with relief. He had an attorney.

"I am _so_ sorry. I was in Barcelona over the holidays and I totally dropped my phone in the Magic Fountain of Montjuic. Don't even ask me how it happened!" She paused for a moment, as if she really _did_ want him to ask her how it happened. "Anyway, I'm back in New York now! Yay!"

Dan wasn't sure what he was expecting Megan to sound like, but her youthful exuberance was a reminder that he was going to be her first…client…ever.

"So anyway, I was wondering what your day looked like." Dan looked at the time. It was already six. A normal person's work day was pretty much over. He could hear her leafing through her organizer.

"Uh...well my 'day' is free," Dan replied.

"Oh." She said this awkwardly before pausing for a moment. "Oh, well, that's awesome!" Her sunny voice nearly blasted out Dan's eardrum and he reflexively pushed the phone away from his ear.

"So you're in Brooklyn, right?"

"Uh, yep."

"Well, let's do dinner. Ever been to Five Leaves?" Dan made a face. _Dinner_? She wanted to do dinner?

Dan hadn't left the loft in almost two weeks. He'd stayed in; alone. Skimming through baby books, he'd learned that at six weeks, his baby's face was taking shape and the heartbeat was beating at eighty-eight beats per minute. _Eighty-eight beats per minute_. It was unbelievable.

He had also been lamenting the strange new trajectory his life had taken recently. Rufus was gone, assisting Lisa with a few shows she was doing in New England-though he promised to be back for Jenny's men's line preview during the Fashion Night at the Frick Global Clean Water Crisis Gala. Jenny hadn't stopped working since she'd returned to New York. Most of the time, she slept at the atelier.

Dinner with a real person sounded? Well it sounded pretty damn good.

"Uh, that's the place in Greenpoint?" It wasn't Dan's neighborhood, but at least he wasn't going to have to venture to Manhattan, where he might risk running into his estranged wife, her mother, or his mistress's husband.

"That's the one. And it's _ah_-mazing! You're gonna love it. Meet you there at say...eight?"

"Sure," Dan replied, sounding significantly more upbeat than he had when he originally answered the call.

"Great! See you then." Dan hung up and took a deep breath. Megan obviously had a ton of energy. So much so that he was feeling reenergized himself. He smiled.

He was looking forward to this...

Precisely two hours later, Dan walked through the door at Five Leaves. He had showered and shaved and was even wearing a dress jacket. He did a quick scan around the small dining room and came face to face with a young woman with an ebullient smile, already seated at a table. She stood up and began to eagerly, though unnecessarily, flag him down. He smiled politely and made his way over.

Megan Collier's appearance completely matched her voice. She was a tiny blonde with a set of crystal blue eyes and a long ponytail. She was dressed impeccably in dress pants and a crisp white blouse. At least she was trying to look the part, Dan thought, even if she did come off a little like Elle Woods in personality. And it didn't escape him that she could have been a miniature doppelgängerof Serena.

"So great to meet you in person, Dan! I am such a big fan of your books. 'Inside' literally changed my life. I cannot believe _you_ are my very first client." She beamed with admiration.

Dan smiled appreciatively as he went to sit down. A waiter quickly came by and set a drink down in front of him, catching him by surprise. Megan read the look on his face.

"Oh! It's called 'The Caulfield.' I figured you'd want something with a literary theme. I'm having the 'Khali Mah myself," Megan explained, gesturing to her glass. "It's dee-lish.'" She lifted her glass up in the air and prodded Dan to do the same. "Cheers," she said brightly as she clinked her glass to his. He hesitantly lifted the drink up to his lips. He wasn't normally a cocktail type of guy, but what the hell? He took a sip, finding that it was actually pretty tasty.

Several seconds later a server set down a plate of appetizers. "Thanks so much," Megan said politely as the waiter nodded and walked off. "These are to _die_ for. They're called 'Devils on Horseback.' They are _figs_ wrapped in bacon!" She explained, as if they were the most amazing culinary treat ever. Dan watched as she grabbed one and popped it into her mouth.

"Try it." She urged. Dan did what he was told and grabbed one, taking a cautious bite.

Megan waited patiently for his reaction. "Well?"

Dan nodded and raised his eyebrows while he swallowed. "Like a party in my mouth."

Megan laughed and surveyed him while he took another bite. "_The_ Dan Humphrey. Wow." Dan was beginning to settle in a bit, and with every sip of his "Caulfield" found himself getting more and more relaxed. And he definitely didn't mind the attention Megan was lavishing upon him. It was nice to be in the company of a woman who wasn't constantly pushing him away or screaming at him.

Two hours later, Dan and Megan found themselves completely stuffed, having gorged on steamed mussels, another order of 'Devils on Horseback,' sweet pea pancakes and cheeseburgers.

Dan was on his fourth 'Caulfield.'

Megan had actually done most of the talking; about herself.

He learned that she had attended Chapin and done her undergrad at Hunter before law school at NYU, and had been engaged for a short time, but had recently called it off. She had always known she was going to be an attorney. Her favorite city to vacation in was Barcelona, and her favorite color was blue.

Oh, and back in high school, she had worshipped at the shrine of Serena van der Woodsen.

"I just thought I should come clean about that," Megan declared. She immediately picked up on how uncomfortable Dan seemed with the revelation.

"I absolutely worshipped her. But believe me, Dan, that was all in my juvenile past," she insisted. "I grew up. Realized I would rather model myself after someone who could make a difference in people's lives. In law school, I actually had the honor of clerking for Justice Sotomayor." Dan leaned back in his chair, impressed; and relieved.

"Wow. So you didn't want to continue on-"

"Down the path to Supreme Court Justice?" She shrugged. "There's still time. But this is the family biz." She smiled as she ran a finger around the rim of her glass.

"But enough about me. We should probably get down to it." She bit her lip as if trying to drum up the courage to ask him something, and Dan nervously took a sip of his drink while she pulled some papers and her Blackberry out of her Lodis briefcase.

"So, if you don't mind my asking? What happened anyway? With Serena. What caused the marriage to disintegrate? And you to-"

He explained in the simplest way possible. "We just, we weren't compatible. It wasn't a very stimulating relationship. For either of us." Dan knew it sounded like a cop out, but it didn't seem like a good idea to mention that he had never gotten over Blair and marrying Serena was an ill-advised attempt to do so.

"And you and Blair Waldorf-Bass. Are you two, you know, are you two still...?"

Dan wasn't sure what to say. As of right now he truly didn't know what Blair was thinking.

"I guess the correct answer should be, 'no?'"

Megan smiled knowingly and nodded. "Sorry. I know it sounds like I'm prying." She continued. "I only ask because the relationship is obviously going to come up."

"Well, then Serena's relationship with Nate Archibald should come up, too," Dan blurted. The liquor was doing some of the talking now.

Megan leaned back in her chair as if she'd had the wind knocked out of her. "Wait. Are...are you serious? _Nate_ _Archibald_? Do you have proof?"

Dan made a pained face. "Uh, not exactly. But I feel like Nate will come clean if asked about it." Megan forced a smile, trying to maintain her positive energy.

"Well, Dan. Even with a testimony from Nate, it's going to be hard to prove adultery without pictures or a confession from Serena herself. And unfortunately, with all of the pictures floating around out there featuring _you_, her attorney has actual evidence of your infidelity."

Dan exhaled as he suddenly recalled the night said photos were taken-the night the earth had shifted on its axis. With one kiss, he and Blair had taken a sledgehammer to their lives. At the time, Dan thought it was going to be a fresh, new, beginning for both of them.

What a difference a few weeks could make.

Megan watched him, taking her cues from his facial expression. "Dan? So tell me, honestly now. Are you and Blair together?"

Dan didn't hesitate this time. "You know, I haven't spoken to Blair in almost two weeks." He hoped that would be enough to answer her question. Or at least keep her from asking more questions. It was as truthful as he could be and it seemed to work because Megan looked relieved.

"Good," she said. "Very, very good." Dan thought she sounded almost a little too excited. But at least she was satisfied with his answer and would hopefully now be moving on from the subject of Blair.

"So have you received any documents from Serena? I hear her attorney is Patrick van Heusen."

"Yeah he is. And no, I haven't received anything yet. Is that...is that normal?"

"Well, filing takes time. van Heusen is notoriously thorough, though. He likes to have all of his ducks in a row. And, uh, he kind of likes to torture the opponent. Catch them off guard. Selecting him as her attorney, it sounds like Serena means business."

"Investigators sifting through my underwear drawer does kind of send that signal." Dan was only half joking.

Megan let out a small laugh and watched her client for a moment. Her eyes glimmered and she suddenly sat up straight. She took a long sip of her drink and leaned over the table, looking Dan straight in the eye.

"Look. Dan. I know you think I'm probably in over my head. That a newbie like myself has no business coming anywhere near such a high profile divorce case."

Dan was caught off guard by her sudden admission. "Well, I admit that I-" he began before she abruptly cut him off.

"I assure you that I was bred for this. I come from an extremely long line of successful New York family law attorneys. You couldn't be in better hands." Dan thought there was something comforting in her voice.

"And though it's true that I once admired your wife, those days are over. We will not be bullied by Serena van der Woodsen or her highfalutin attorney. They can bring in all the investigators they want to, but it won't make a difference. We will not back down. This is no holds barred. If they want a fight, they're going to get one."

Dan wasn't sure exactly what brought her little disquisition on, but he was suddenly inspired. He could practically hear the theme from "Rocky" playing in the background.

"But I need to know that you trust me, Dan. And that you're going to listen to me when I advise you. And that you're going to be one hundred percent honest with me at all times." She looked at him with steely blue eyes. "Are you with me, Dan?"

Her words were laced with subtext, and he knew there was no way he would be able to live up to what she was asking of him. But he needed an attorney. He needed this divorce to happen, and sooner rather than later.

This was his only shot.

"Absolutely." She eyed him for a minute, but seemed fairly satisfied, if not completely convinced.

"Good. Now, what shall we request from Serena? Now that I know she's been carrying on with Nate Archibald, it kind of levels the playing field, don't you think?"

"But I thought you said-"

Megan shrugged. "We'll get proof. So, you two lived in an apartment on East 55th street which you purchased, correct? And she's still living there now?"

"Yep. But if giving her the apartment means the quickest, most painless divorce possible then-"

"Dan. We're not giving her the apartment," she said adamantly. "What do you say we just put the ball in their court? I'll come up with a list of demands. Nothing we have to stick to, of course. Just test the waters a bit. Make _them _respond. I can have the petition filed by next week." Megan could tell Dan was a bit uneasy with this.

"Of course you can review it beforehand, just to make sure you're okay with it." Dan sat back in his chair. He was a little unsure about her aggressive methods, but at least he was going to be able to approve the requests. Megan typed a few notes into her Blackberry before placing the phone in her purse.

"So," she said as she pursed her lips together, "this was fun!" She had officially brought back her bubbly persona from earlier.

"Yeah. Yeah it was," Dan said gratefully. "Thanks. To be honest, I...I really needed this."

Megan smiled. "Well, I could tell from the sound of your voice on the phone that you were feeling down. I know divorce can be isolating. Figured you could use a stress reliever."

Dan gave her a half smile. "It's not just the divorce, honestly. I'm actually...I'm having a few issues with my book publisher. And my book agent," Dan admitted.

Megan sat up again. "Well, my best friend is an assistant at Persea. She was a huge 'Inside' fan, too. They're small but I'm sure they'd love the opportunity to work with you. I could make a call?"

Dan sat up in his chair. "Seriously?"

"Of course. You are my client. My talented, intelligent, and extremely handsome client. Consider it done." She pulled her phone back out and typed in a reminder to herself. Dan shifted uncomfortably in his seat, wondering if he was really hearing what he thought he was hearing. Because it sounded like she was coming on to him.

"Now onto other pressing matters. Plans for the weekend?"

"Well, I uh, actually I'm attending this fundraiser with my sister. Some kind of water gala fashion thing."

Megan tilted her head to the side in disbelief. "You're kidding me. The Global Clean Water Crisis Gala? I'm going too! My Aunt is on the board at The Frick!"

Dan shifted in his seat again. With his attorney in the same locale, he was suddenly unsure what that would mean for his plan to see Blair.

"We should totally do dinner beforehand!" Megan said excitedly.

"I...well..."

"I'll call you with the deets." Megan smiled as she rose up from her chair, shoving the dinner receipt into her Lodis briefcase. She paused for a moment, then turned and walked over to Dan's side of the table. She leaned in, coming in close to his face.

And then Megan did something strange. She lightly touched Dan's hair with her hand. "Your luck is changing Mr. Humphrey," she whispered. Dan suddenly gulped with widened eyes. "Have a good rest of your night."

Dan watched, confused, as she gave him a quick wave and sauntered out the door.

* * *

A groggy Georgina sat up in bed and looked around for her ringing phone, irritably shoving Phillip's arm away from her.

Hey, she had to pay him for the child care somehow, right?

She had left Milo in his charge nearly every day since she'd been back in New York so she could go off and collect intel. Okay, maybe sometimes it wasn't _just_ to collect intel. Sending taunting texts to Dan-now that was just good fun. Ideally though, the information she had accumulated over the past couple of weeks was meant to aide her, including the biggest bombshell of them all-Blair Waldorf-Bass was with child; Dan Humphrey's child.

Georgina finally spotted the phone on the floor and rushed over to pick it up, looking at the screen. _Jack. _"Damn." She peeked back over at Phillip.

She and Jack had been texting sporadically over the past couple of weeks. It had been just enough communication, she thought, to keep him from getting suspicious that she was no longer in Australia. Until now, she'd been able to avoid speaking to him directly. But today he was actually calling.

Time was officially running out for Georgina Sparks.

She needed just one more person on board with her; someone who , unfortunately, had been missing in action over the past couple of weeks.

Georgina took a deep breath before finally answering. "Please don't tell me you have to stay in New York for another week!" She was doing her best impression of a desperate housewife. "And aren't you up rather early?" she added for good measure, noticing it was six in the morning. She, herself, had been out late the night before.

And she knew that Jack had been as well.

Jack smirked. For _most_ it would have been considered early. But he hadn't even bothered to go to bed. He and Chuck had been making the rounds at the clubs every night this week. He had to maintain his nephew's trust-though he _had_ left Chuck passed out in the VIP area at Marquee the night before. Jack couldn't have him finding out about Hong Kong or any of the other potential locations he was eyeing behind Chuck's back. He had to stay committed to playing the part of the devoted uncle. Jack even convinced Chuck to live it up now, because once he got custody of his son, it was going to be a whole different story. Jack momentarily considered trying to talk him out of seeking full custody, just for added effect of course, but ultimately decided that might be overkill. He wanted Chuck distracted, and the more time Chuck spent focusing on his son, the easier it would be to keep his side deals under wraps.

"The work never stops, sweetheart," Jack replied condescendingly. "It's how I can afford to keep dressing you in Jason Wu and Stella. And unfortunately I do have to stay in New York a bit longer." Jack waited with bated breath to hear her response, because contrary to her belief, he actually knew she was in New York. At least she _had been_. He had seen her scurrying into the elevator at Bass Industries approximately two weeks earlier. He was slightly confused about why was skulking around his office, though he figured she was simply keeping tabs on him. The woman was possessive.

This was their relationship in a nutshell-him telling her not to do something and her immediately defying him. It was a game. A game he thoroughly enjoyed. And over the past two weeks he'd been enjoying her texts, or rather, "sexts," which he knew were meant to distract him and avoid suspicion. But he was ready to raise the stakes.

And of course, he was also curious if she'd heard anything regarding his conversation with Rich. Not that his wife would have any reason to complain. More income for him meant more income for her.

"Well," Georgina sighed, "I don't like it," she lied, "but I understand. You have to do what you have to do. Ta Ta!" She said, as if in a rush.

"Wait, wait, wait. G. I've been thinking. Since it looks like business will be keeping me here for a while longer, why don't you and Milo join me here? I can send the Bass jet to pick you up." Jack reclined in his chair, watching sunrise over the Manhattan skyline.

And preparing himself to hear his wife squirm.

"Uh, so now you want me there?" Georgina huffed. "Well, I...I can't now! You see I've...I mean I've joined a book club since you've been gone and I'm hosting the next meeting!"

Jack put a clenched fist over his mouth to stifle a laugh. "A book club, huh? I didn't know you were a reader."

"Me? No. _I'm_ not!" She laughed nervously. "Did I say _I_ joined a book club? I meant Milo! Milo is hosting a book club. And there are about to be _ten_ seven year olds running around here so I need to go prepare the Fairy Bread." Jack looked at his watch and smirked. He knew what time it was on every continent.

"A children's book club. At eight in the evening?" Georgina was silently cursing herself as she scrambled to come up with a decent explanation.

"It's a...it's a sleepover book club. Kind of a new thing we're experimenting with. Everyone has to bring a flashlight. Lots of fun. Okay gotta run..."

"Wait," Jack said firmly, tightly gripping the phone. Georgina gritted her teeth in her frustration. "That picture you sent me last night got me pretty hot. I could really use some relief if you know what I mean. You think you could give me a little verbal encouragement?" He pursed his lips together, excited to see how she'd respond to his request. Georgina made a face as she watched Phillip grunt and turn over onto his side. She tapped her fingers on the bed, waiting for a moment to make sure he wasn't going to wake up.

Georgina then furrowed her brow. "You're at work?"

"Yes." Jack could hear the strain in her voice.

Georgina shrugged. "Okay. Sure. Why not?" She finally said, her eyes nearly rolling into another dimension. Jack was pleasantly surprised, though he shouldn't have been. Since he'd known her, she'd been up for anything. Anytime. Anyplace. And that's what he loved about her. That and the stories she could spin about children's sleepover book clubs. Jack sat upright in his chair.

She took a deep breath. "Jack Bass, you've been a bad boy. So now I have to punish you," she purred into the phone.

"Oh yeah..." Jack smiled, slightly out of breath as he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, preparing himself as his wife painted an array of erotic images onto his mind with her skillful words.

"You make me feel like a real woman," she said almost robotically as she examined her manicure, only half into it. A still snoozing Phillip sighed nearby, a smile drifting onto his face.

"Oh yeah, baby. Tell me what you want me to-" And with that Georgina made a face and pressed the end call button on her phone. She quickly sent off a text to him.

_"Sorry. Milo walked in. Maybe later."_

Georgina licked her lips, then scrolled to a picture she'd taken the night before. It was a picture of Dan and a pretty, petite blonde. The blonde was smiling down at him, her head only inches away from his. She was stroking his hair. After two weeks of stakeouts, this was the only action Georgina had seen-aside from the action she'd witnessed Jack and Chuck getting of course.

Blair was apparently in hiding. And that was a problem.

Georgina smirked. If Blair wasn't going to come out of hiding on her own, then she was just going to have to smoke Queen B out. Fortunately, this picture was her ticket to do just that.

"Phillip!" She yelled as she hit him with a pillow. Phillip just barely opened his eyes. She had one night left to get her plan together or it was back to life as a housewife in Sydney.

"I'm going to need to borrow your credit card to purchase a new gown. I have a gala to attend."

It was time for Georgina to get to work.

* * *

It had been uncomfortably quiet at the Waldorf atelier. Blair hadn't been around, and Eleanor was being uncharacteristically subdued, keeping to herself in her office most of the time. Jenny had been left to make her own introductions to the bigwigs from the major New York department stores, which really wasn't a problem. Everyone seemed intrigued by Jenny's new ideas for the company, and she had been hyping the new Millennia men's line to everyone. And this weekend she was going to finally put her money where her mouth was. She was previewing the Millennia line during Fashion Night at the Frick's Global Clean Water Crisis Gala. If everything went as planned, she'd soon be dressing the most affluent business men not only in New York, but in the world. To top it all off, her premier model was one of the most sought after bachelors in the city: Nate Archibald.

Jenny felt like she'd officially arrived. She was being pulled in a million different directions, but it was a feeling she relished.

There was something else preoccupying her, though. Or rather _someone_. Dan had been in a state of despair since his phone call with Blair. Jenny truly wanted to help him, but it was starting to become more and more apparent that Blair wasn't going to attend the gala. Jenny knew that Dan would still come to support her, but the main reason he had agreed to come was because she told him that she could stage a run in with Blair. She regretted having gotten her brother's hopes up, but she never would have dreamed that Blair would have gone underground for so long.

"Jenny!" Eleanor called out from her office. Jenny quickly put down the pencil she'd been gnawing on and hustled herself over.

"Did you confirm _all_ of the models for the Gala?" Jenny nodded emphatically.

"Then why do I only see five names listed here?" Eleanor interrogated.

"Oh. Because our sixth model is kind of a surprise," Jenny said enthusiastically. Eleanor ripped off her glasses and frowned.

"A _surprise_?" She asked dubiously. The last thing Eleanor wanted or needed was any more surprises.

"Trust me, Eleanor. You will be pleased. He's an influencer. A successful businessman. _And_ he's gorgeous." Jenny beamed and looked down at her watch. "As a matter of fact, I have to go meet with him right now to discuss logistics."

Eleanor heaved a sigh. "Jenny. I don't need to remind you that we cannot afford to have any mistakes at this event. I just heard through the grapevine that Marc Jacobs plans on previewing something from his men's line as well. Everyone from Ron Perelman to Joan Tisch will be attending, and I am donating _a lot_ of money to this cause. We must make the most of it."

"I assure you Eleanor. I am not taking any chances. I know my job is on the line." Eleanor nodded pointedly before returning to review some designs.

Jenny turned on her heels to exit, but quickly turned back around, remembering Dan. "Um. How is Blair doing by the way?" Eleanor's demeanor suddenly softened.

"Blair? Blair…is focusing on her child for the time being." She said before pausing for a moment. "And she's doing okay. Thank you."

Jenny nodded, but knew that wouldn't be enough information to placate Dan. "I know she's going through a tough time, but I'd hate for her to miss the preview," Jenny added.

"Yes, well," Eleanor looked up, "I am going to try to persuade her to come. Though I highly doubt I'll be able to convince her."

Jenny nodded understandingly. "Well, I truly hope you're able to. She deserves to see her hard work come to fruition, too, you know?"

Eleanor said nothing as she continued to examine her designs. Jenny watched her for a moment until an agitated Eleanor suddenly slammed the designs down on the desk.

"Jenny! Do not just stand there watching _me_. You have a lot of work to do before tomorrow."

Jenny jumped nervously and grabbed her purse. "Right. Yes. You're absolutely right."

With a bit of urgency in her step, off she went to prepare her premier model for the biggest night of her career.

Jenny made it to Nate's Long Island estate in record time, and swiftly walked up to the front door. She rang the doorbell and Nate immediately answered with a big toothy grin on his face. His grin quickly dissipated. Definitely not who he was expecting.

"Uh. Jenny? I…w-what are you doing here?" He stammered.

Jenny shot him a warm smile. "I told you I was coming over, silly. I have to brief you on tomorrow night." She stepped into the parlor and made herself at home on the couch, crossing her legs. An uncomfortable Nate followed cautiously behind.

"Oh, yeah. Well, I just assumed I would put the suit on and walk out on the stage. Doesn't really take a rocket scientist to do that."

Jenny laughed and shook her head at his naïveté.

"Obviously, we don't want anyone seeing you wearing the suit beforehand, so there will be a make shift dressing area set up for you upstairs in an office. I'll meet you at the entrance at seven. Waldorf Designs will kick start the evening, and Eleanor will be giving a check to Georgina Chapman on stage right before you and the other models are presented." Jenny was speaking fast. He honestly didn't realize there was going to be so much involved. He thought all he'd have to do was come to the party wearing the suit.

"Nate, I know I don't have to tell you this, but this night really could make or break me. If anything goes wrong, Eleanor will have my head." Jenny inhaled and tried to shake off a sudden onset of nerves as she stood up from the couch. "Just so you know you're wearing the piece de résistance of our collection." Jenny smiled apprehensively and Nate's supportive instincts suddenly kicked in.

"Well I'm flattered. And trust me. Nothing will go wrong. You're Jenny Humphrey. You thrive under this kind of pressure." He took a step toward her and gently rubbed her arms, causing a shiver to trickle down her spine. She looked into his eyes, suddenly forgetting why she was even there. Without thinking, she leaned up as if she was going to kiss him, catching Nate by complete surprise. Before she could get to his lips Nate had gently pushed her away. "Um...Jenny, what are you-?"

Jenny grabbed her cheeks in embarrassment. "Oh my God, oh my God. I am _so_ sorry. I'm obviously suffering from sleep deprivation. I didn't mean-" She shook her head fervently as her face quickly took on the hue of a beet.

Nate managed a small laugh. "It's fine. Honestly. But um, listen. I kind of have a guest coming over in a bit." He looked out the window to make sure Serena hadn't arrived yet. "I hate to-" Unfortunately Jenny knew exactly what "guest" meant.

"Oh. Oh yeah. Sure," Jenny replied. "A guest...So I'll just..." Nate smiled and politely leaned in for a hug. Jenny gently reciprocated, her chin barely coming to rest on his shoulder. Her eyes suddenly fell on the piano, and something she didn't really care to see. A very expensive looking bra was dangling over the piano bench. Jenny roughly pushed Nate away then grabbed her purse from off of the couch.

"Okay, well I'll see you tomorrow night," she stated curtly as she headed toward the door. She didn't bother to wait for a response from him before abruptly opening the door and nearly slamming it behind her. She leaned against it for a moment, trying to catch her breath and forget about the fact that he had apparently been screwing someone on that piano bench. She made her way to the car and instructed the driver to take her back to Manhattan. She couldn't even bear to look out the window as they drove away.

And if she had, she might have seen Serena watching her, arms crossed from the side of the house.

* * *

It was Saturday night in the city.

Blair surveyed herself in her sparkling new, off the shoulder Marchesa. She hadn't heard a peep from Chuck since he and his vile attorney had decided to let themselves into her family's penthouse and interrogate her little boy about her personal life. It was quite suspect that he hadn't even attempted to see his son. Thankfully, Henry had gone back to school and was distracted enough to have given up asking to see his father.

Despite Blair's desire to go and confront her husband on his dirty tactics and why he had yet to respond to the divorce petition, she had taken Randall's advice. She had kept her distance from him and kept her focus on Henry instead.

This meant she also had to keep her distance from Dan. There were several occasions she wanted to pick up the phone just to hear his voice. He always knew what to say to make her feel protected and safe. However, this was just a temporary measure, she told herself. For now, Blair was determined to show a judge that her priorities were where they needed to be. So for the past two weeks, Blair had been as attentive as any mother could be, keeping a low profile and keeping her public outings reserved merely for taking Henry to school and picking him up, through the back entrance of the building of course.

It wasn't the most stimulating existence, but it had been completely stress free, which was something she desperately needed. She was using the rest of her spare time to try and get healthy, both mentally and physically. She was doing yoga and drinking Dorota's special oat and berry pregnancy smoothies which simultaneously aided in alleviating some of the morning sickness and giving her the calories she so desperately needed. She had even managed to put on five pounds.

Tonight, Eleanor had requested that she come out of hiding. Waldorf women didn't cower to anyone, and the company needed to show a united front at the gala. In fact, Blair was finally ready to face the world again, comforted by the fact that Henry would be safe under Dorota's watchful eye and that _no one_ would be getting past the door man.

"Darling, you look wonderful. You are positively glowing." Eleanor gleamed, startling her daughter as she popped her head out from behind the bedroom door.

Blair was hoping no one else would pick up on the fact that she was _positively_ _glowing_.

"How are you feeling, dear?"

Blair turned to face her mother. "I'm feeling good, Mother. Really good." She leaned over to pick up her clutch and quickly looked at her phone, reviewing a picture of Dan and a pretty young blonde who was running her fingers through his hair. She closed her eyes and exhaled.

"I guess we should probably get going now," Blair let out, forcing a smile.

* * *

After a quick dinner at Bar Italia, Dan and Megan arrived at the Frick just before sunset. She happily locked her arm through his as they made their way into the Garden Court where the Meccore quartet was playing. There were people mingling and drinking champagne, but no one who Dan immediately recognized. And definitely no Blair. Jenny had already informed him that the chances of her coming were slim. He was now wishing he had just stayed home. Megan was a little _handsy_, and he was still trying to decipher if this was how she was with everyone or if it was something else entirely.

She leaned over to give Dan's tie a quick straightening, quickly picking up on his apprehension. A waiter strolled by and she grabbed two glasses of champagne, shoving one into Dan's hand.

"Here, drink this. It'll help take the edge off." She did a quick scan of the room. "Oh my gosh. Look who's here. It's Patrick van Heusen." Dan followed her gaze to see a tall gentleman holding court with a number of other distinguished looking men. She raised a single eyebrow. "Guess Serena invited him?"

Dan took a swig of his champagne and surveyed the man who was making his life a living hell. He was standing near the fountain, looking incredibly smug, gesturing fervently with his hands.

"I think I'm going to go introduce myself," Megan suddenly announced, wetting her lips. Before Dan could say anything she had already made it halfway to the fountain. He watched as she confidently extended her hand to him. Dan couldn't read lips, but he could tell she'd caught him off guard. He had to hand it to her. She had moxie.

"Oh, Dan! Thank God you're here. I am _so_ nervous." Jenny looked like she wanted to throw up.

"It's going to be fine, Jen. Here. Just sip on this." He handed his glass of champagne to her. His sister had been going non-stop, and had barely had time to breathe.

"Oh damn it." She shook her head and looked at the time on her phone. It was ten after seven. "There's Eleanor. And of course Nate hasn't shown up yet. I'm so screwed."

Dan looked around in hopes of spotting Nate, but to no avail. "Well, maybe he ran into traffic or something," Dan suggested. "Or something at work, maybe? I know he's been putting in a lot of hours at the Spectator. He works almost every weekend." Jenny gave Dan a strange look.

"Really? Because I don't think he's been to the office in two weeks. He's been working from home."

Before she could elaborate further, Eleanor caught sight of her and waved her over. She quickly shoved the champagne flute back into Dan's hand. "Pray for me," she pleaded before flittering off toward Eleanor's direction.

Dan wondered if what Jenny said could have possibly been true. Nate told him he had to ditch their dinner plans because something had come up at The Spectator. There was no way he misheard that. Dan aggressively swigged down the rest of the champagne, more than a little peeved that Nate had apparently lied to him. As he turned to look for a waiter he could hit up for another drink, he instantly spotted someone he didn't expect to see.

Blair. She was standing at the entrance.

He swallowed hard, trying to catch his breath, suddenly unable to see anything else. He was in a fog, and he could have sworn his heart had stopped beating as he watched her scan the room. She looked a little uneasy, but shimmered in her white gown, hair falling down upon her shoulders and beyond as she stepped up behind Eleanor who was giving an earful to Jenny. A waiter walked up to Blair to offer her champagne and she instantly declined.

"Well, what a surprise. I see Blair's already keeping her distance from you."

Dan turned around to see a gloating Serena standing behind him.

Dan rolled his eyes at her. "Yep. You called it. Blair dumped me. Looks like you got what you wanted." Dan exchanged another empty glass for a full one from a passing waiter's tray.

"I tried to warn you. Just like I tried to warn you the last time," Serena shot back smugly. "And now look at where we all are. Tell me, Dan. Was it really worth it?" Dan forced himself to bite his tongue. Was she really in a position to be lecturing him?

"Serena van der Woodsen? What an honor!" Megan called out from a few feet away as she rushed over to stand next to Dan. Serena was taken aback by the tiny blonde who could have been a petite version of herself.

Serena smiled graciously, matching Megan's enthusiasm. "I'm so sorry," Serena said apologetically. "I am really bad with names. Do I know you?"

"You _don't_ actually," Megan said emphatically. "But I know all about you. And Nate Archibald. Nice work." She spared Serena a snarky wink, causing the other's mouth to drop to the floor.

Serena indignantly placed her hand on her hip. "Excuse me?"

Megan extended her hand, still smiling gleefully. "Oh. Sorry. Megan Collier. Dan's attorney." Serena looked Megan over from head to toe.

"You?" She snorted. "You're Dan's attorney?"

"Uh-yep," Dan interjected. He was suddenly enjoying himself.

"And I just met _your_ attorney. Jeez. What a giant sleaze ball. Anywho, you'll have to excuse us. I need to introduce Dan to some people who actually still matter. Toodles." Dan bit his lip to try and stifle a laugh as Megan led him away by his sleeve.

Serena's eyes narrowed as Dan gave her a sarcastic wave and she watched with an annoyed glare as Megan led him away. While his attorney was pulling him across the room, Dan's eyes momentarily glanced up and he locked eyes with Blair. She was watching him with her infamous Medusa like stare.

It was crystal clear to Dan that Blair wasn't pleased with what she was seeing.

"Nate where have you been?" Jenny shrieked, garment bag in hand, as she met Nate at the entrance of the museum. He gave Jenny an apologetic look.

"I am so sorry," Jenny. "The car service was late for some reason and my phone went missing so I couldn't call you." Jenny gave him a dubious look. She should have been livid, but all it took was one regretful look from the guy she'd been crushing on since her freshman year of high school to realize that being angry with Nate was useless; and impossible.

She grabbed Nate's hand and ushered him through the entrance hall and into the crowd of party goers assembled in the Garden Court. Serena, still seething from getting dissed by Megan Collier, quickly became aware of Nate's presence. '_Guess the car service finally showed up.'_

She sighed, then followed surreptitiously behind as Jenny led Nate to the direction of a back stairwell to take him to the second floor.

Serena waited for a moment before following them up.

When they got to the second floor, Jenny opened the door to a curator's office, which was to serve as Nate's dressing room for the evening.

"Okay," Jenny said breathlessly as she hung the garment bag on a closet door, "it's precisely seven-thirty now. Everyone will be assembled in the Music Room by eight. Do not come out until eight o'one, got it? If anyone sees you it could spoil-"

"Jenny. You need to just breathe. I promise. I won't come out until eight o'one."

"Are you..are you sure you understand-?"

"I've got this. Now go on. This is your big night. You should be out there mingling or networking or something. I promise I won't come out until eight o'one on the dot." Jenny took a breath, relieved that Nate understood how much pressure she was under.

"Thank you, Nate. For doing this for me. It really means a lot." Jenny smiled gratefully and he gave her a friendly hug, rubbing her arms as he had done the night before. Up until now, she had managed to put the lingerie visual out of her head, but with Nate's gesture, it was suddenly making a comeback.

She began to fidget. "Okay, well, break a leg then." Nate watched her, slightly concerned, as she abruptly saw herself out. He walked over and had a seat on the couch, wondering why he even needed to be here so early. He was about to get up and examine the suit when he was distracted by a knock at the door. Serena popped her head inside.

"Hey you!" she giggled. "Ready for your stint as America's next top model?" She walked inside, a garment bag in her hand. She then closed the door, locking it behind her.

"Uh, I don't think you're supposed to be up here, Serena."

"Oh, you're such a party pooper. Besides. I had to return your phone to you. Sorry. Guess I accidentally picked it up last night on accident." She hung the garment bag in her possession next to the one Jenny had hung up, and then walked over and plopped herself down in Nate's lap. He gave her a disapproving look.

"What's that?" He asked, eyeing the bag she had just hung up.

"Oh. That?" She asked coyly. "It's uh...it's just the bag my dress came in. I had some last minute errands to do before the gala so I had to get dressed here."

Nate gave a quick nod. It made sense to him.

"Of course now I have some free time on my hands," she said knowingly. "I figured you could use some help getting ready?" She slowly ran her hands along his collar. Nate immediately grabbed them, pushing them away.

"Uh, aren't you supposed to be the co-chair or something? Maybe you should-"

"Trust me Nate. My work here is done. Besides, 'co-chair' is more of an honorary title. A way to attract people to the event. And the people are here now so..." She began to slowly kiss along Nate's jawline.

"Not here, Serena," Nate huffed. "You do realize there are about two hundred people downstairs."

"I locked the door, Nate. No one is coming in here unless they have a key." She leaned in again and started in on his neck.

"Not that getting caught wouldn't be fun, though." She laughed, adjusting herself in his lap. Nate frowned and Serena sat up. "Fine. Then maybe I can help you with the suit," she suggested, running her hands along his chest. "Make sure everything fits...snugly. Get rid of those..._pesky_ wrinkles." Serena moved over a bit so she could unzip Nate's pants.

Nate gulped. "Well, I guess I _could_ use some...some help. You know with the _wrinkles_." He inhaled loudly as his head tilted back against the couch. Serena grinned and got down off the couch and onto her knees. She bit her lip before voraciously stripping his pants off.

"Sounds like a plan."

Back in the Garden Court, Dan knew he was being watched and he knew exactly by whom. After allowing himself to ogle her upon her arrival, and after some uncomfortable eye contact, he told himself he was going to refrain from looking at her now. He wasn't succeeding. He had come here to make sure Blair was okay. And from the looks of things, she was more than. She looked healthy and glowing, and damn it if he couldn't keep his eyes off of her!

This game of stealing glances at the other was about to come to a head.

Thankfully, Megan had run into her old roommate from Hunter and had stepped away into the Reception hall, or she surely would have suspected something. While Dan conversed with the vice president of the Young Lions, Blair was finally able to make extended eye contact with him, holding his gaze for a full ten seconds.

She slowly turned in the direction of the deserted East Vestibule, inconspicuously indicating that she wanted him to follow her. Dan watched her for a moment before looking around and making sure no one was paying attention. He quickly grabbed one more glass of champagne and swigged it down for courage before slowly following her out.

Blair was waiting for him by the roped off stairwell, but didn't bother to wait for him to catch up with her before proceeding to move the ropes away and ascending the staircase. She walked slowly and methodically as he maintained his distance several paces behind. Once she got to the second floor landing, she made a quick turn and disappeared through a door down the hall. It was dark and quiet, and obviously meant to be off limits to the public, which apparently meant nothing to Blair. Dan took a sweeping breath. He didn't even know what he was going to say to her, but he had been waiting two weeks for this moment. He was angry, but he didn't want to waste precious time fighting with her either.

He walked the length of the hallway, and with bated breath placed his hand on the doorknob, letting himself in. Blair looked up as if he'd startled her, even though she knew he was coming. He closed the door behind him.

They stood there for a moment, just awkwardly watching one another.

Blair suddenly inhaled. "This was once Adelaide Frick's study," she said, hoping to break the ice with a bit of a history lesson. "It's the director's office now. He's in Bermuda this week."

Dan was mildly amused, but was quickly brought back down to earth as he remembered the phone call she had made to him two weeks earlier.

"What do you want, Blair? You told me not to talk to you, remember?" His words were tinged with anger.

"I just want to know if you're okay." Blair replied softly. He said nothing as he surveyed her up close for the first time. She was always beautiful to him, but he could actually see a physical change in her since the last time he saw her. Her cheeks were full and rosy, her skin bright and radiant. Apparently, her decision to stay away from him was paying off.

Blair began to fidget waiting for his reply. "Will you _please_ say something?" She asked, losing patience.

"What do you want me to say, Blair?" He asked, shortly. A pained look spread across her face and she unconsciously grabbed her stomach. Dan suddenly felt like an asshole. "You look beautiful," he blurted, suddenly feeling guilty.

Blair gave a half smile, pleased with the compliment-and that his tone was less passive agressive. "You look...very nice," she returned. "And...what a cute date you brought. Who says grown women can't do sparkly eye shadow?" Dan managed a grin. For a minute things almost felt normal again. This, he told himself. He could make do with this; Just a conversation with some snarky banter. Blair's eyes narrowed. "Why are you..." She began uncomfortably. "You're not...I mean you aren't really..." She looked down at the floor. "Who is she?" She finally exclaimed.

"Do you really care?" He shot back. He wasn't going to let her off the hook that easily.

"Why wouldn't I care, Dan?" She asked, getting increasingly agitated with his tactic of answering every question with another question.

"Because, Blair. Telling someone to stay away and not to contact you kind of sends that message. And I'm pretty sure you know that I've been given a restraining order to stay away from your kid. Which I guess you have no problem with either?" Blair looked up at him, her mouth open in protest, but when she went to speak nothing came out.

"Okay then. I guess I'll take that as a yes." Dan shook his head, annoyed. The tone of his voice was stern. "I just...I don't get it. I don't understand how you can tell me you love me one minute and the next you're just shutting me out. Refusing to talk to me. The last two weeks have been absolute hell for me, Blair." He took a step toward her. "I just...I can't..." His hands were now flailing and he was getting more and more flustered. "And I...I understand why you're doing it. But this...this isn't working for me." He began to reach for the doorknob, needing to escape.

"Wait! Don't go!" Blair pleaded. He turned back around, exasperatedly running his fingers through his hair.

"Dan-" She couldn't decide what to say next. She just knew she didn't want him to leave.

"What, Blair?" Dan said, getting agitated. "Say it!"

Before she could say anything, he was on her.

His lips were assaulting hers, prying them open, tongues clashing. One of his hands clamped around her neck, holding her in place like a vice grip. She struggled to free her arms but he was leaving her no room. His breath was hot against her skin as he lifted her up, her toes just skimming off of the floor. She moaned into his mouth as he roughly carried her over to the desk. Weeks of frustration and anger were spilling through his lips which were now maniacally attacking her neck. She was panting, trying in vain to keep up with his movements. Dan planted Blair on the desk and she was finally able to free her hands, working to pull his tie off.

She involuntarily bucked against him as his hand aggressively worked its way under her Marchesa and his other around to her backside, blindly fumbling around for the zipper. Dan harshly began to unzip her gown as he continued to bite and lick her neck.

"Careful, Dan!" She exclaimed, imploring him to be gentle with the zipper. Blair's pleas fell completely on deaf ears and before she knew it the Marchesa was coming off. With Blair's assistance, Dan worked to pull it down completely, their hands locked together, sliding it off of her legs and letting it drop to the floor. Dan took a moment to look at her. She was now adorned only in a white lace strapless bra and matching panties. She leaned back on her hands watching him watch her.

Blair began to kick her heels off, hoping that would prod him to hurry up and continue. Except for his tie which Blair barely managed to get off, he was still completely clothed. She wanted him to say something, but he just stood there. He was silent. He was torturing her. He was punishing her; a combination of anger and lust emanating from his face as he listened to her whimper from her place on the desk.

Then finally, he extended a single hand, letting it slowly run up the inside of her bare thigh. In turn, she began to run her foot along the outside of his leg, urging him on and simultaneously giving him more room to explore. His hand drifted up to her wet center and she bit her lip in pleasure when he moved her panties away, inserting two fingers inside of her.

"Oh God," she mewed as she tilted her head back, her hair falling down behind her. "Kiss me," she whispered, palming her breasts.

Dan leaned in and kissed her on the mouth, his tongue once again prying her lips open for full access. He began to work her clit slowly, taking in every facial reaction, every movement, and she writhed from his touch. She was breathless as he suddenly removed his fingers, gasping as he roughly grabbed her head and tilted it back up for another hot, lingering kiss. He removed his lips from hers only so he could take off his jacket and unbutton his shirt and pants.

Blair started to grow fervid and began to part her legs for him as he pulled his shirt down halfway. She leaned up into him, practically rocking off of the desk in anticipation before he even had his pants down. She was quickly losing patience as she watched him unzip himself, his pants dropping to the cold, hardwood floor. He positioned himself back between her legs and ran his fingers tentatively along the edge of her panties before forcefully pulling them down with one hand. He then yanked down his boxers and plunged inside of her, eliciting a happy sigh of relief from her. She tried her best to grip her hands to the desk, messing up what were probably some very important documents. She wrapped her legs as tightly as she could around him, crossing them at his waist in order to stabilize herself while he rocked into her vigorously. His hands were now gripping her thighs and holding them in place to get the deepest penetration possible.

Her head tilted back once again. "Oh, Dan. Yes..." Dan said nothing as he continued to steadily submerse himself inside of her, her breasts starting to escape the lacy confines of her bra.

"Oh…oh shit. God, Dan!" Dan watched her as she reached orgasm, but continued to thrust. Balancing on one hand now, she let the other one drift up to cup his face, her fingers trickling down to dance along his chest and down to his abdomen. He closed his eyes at the sensation and the determination in his face was satisfying to watch.

"Humphrey," she gasped, and he opened his eyes in response.

When she was sure his eyes were on her, she slowly ran her tongue along her lip.

That was that.

With three more deep thrusts, he came hard, releasing himself inside of her, and Blair collapsed backwards on the desk in exhaustion, sending stacks of folders and paperwork flying to the floor. Her legs were still maintaining their hold on him.

"I think I should piss you off more often," Blair said, smiling lazily as she tried to catch her breath. Dan said nothing as he pulled his boxers back up and started to put his pants on. She propped herself up on her hands.

"What's wrong?"

He looked up at her for a quick second, then started to button his shirt back up. He picked her dress up off of the floor and handed it to her.

"Humphrey!"

"I meant what I said, Blair," he said sternly. "I don't want to live like this. You abolishing me from your life, then seeking me out because you-" Blair could have protested then. He was the one who dove on _her,_ after all. Instead she let him talk without interruption as she gently slid herself off of the desk, adjusting her undergarments in the process.

He looked at her, still overcome with emotion as he finished buttoning up his shirt. "I want to be able to talk to you when I want to talk to you, Blair. I want to be able to make love to you. In a bed. Like normal people do. I want to be able to know how your pregnancy is going and I want to hear you complaining about your morning sickness. I want to know if you're eating and what you're eating. I want to watch you wake up in the morning, Blair. And I'd like to go at least one full day where I don't feel like you're pushing me away or keeping something from me!"

Blair sighed as she began to work her dress back on. "I didn't abolish you, Dan. You know why I'm doing this. My attorney says that a judge wants to see me focusing on my child. Not a relationship."

Dan shook his head in frustration. "I don't care what your attorney says, Blair. The two don't have to be mutually exclusive." He walked over and helped her zip up. "They can't be. Not when you're carrying my child," he said softly. "And Blair, pretty soon, it's going to start becoming obvious. To everyone."

Blair closed her eyes. "I know."

"So what's the point then?" Dan was adamant.

Blair let out a frustrated sigh and turned around to face him. "I could lose Henry, Dan! Chuck brought his attorney to the penthouse when I wasn't there. They questioned him. About you. About our..." She swallowed hard. "He might as well have told them we were having sex in front of him." Dan shut his eyes in response. That's what got him the restraining order.

"I just...I can't take any chances, Dan."

"Blair, no judge in his right mind is going to take your son away from you. Especially with Chuck's reputation."

Blair gave a him a faint smile. "I think you're right, but I just can't believe the lengths he's already gone to. The restraining order... I just don't understand what he wants." Dan reached out and cupped her cheeks in his hands.

"To win, Blair. Chuck is hurt right now. That's obvious. But you can't live your life in fear over what he'll do next. He's lashing out. But I truly believe in time he's going to realize that he needs to put his son's interests above his own. What he's doing now...nobody wins. Especially not Henry."

Blair nodded. "Maybe you're right," she said softly.

"But um. Just to make you feel better, I'm willing to continue to keep things discreet," he joked, trying to get her to smile. "It's more fun that way anyway." He leaned in to kiss her and she practically swooned in his arms, letting him hold her up. "I guess a museum is a respectable runner up to a Vividus."

She looked up at Dan, grabbing him around the waist, her doe eyes blinking up at him. "We can figure something out, right?"

Dan laughed. "I don't think we have a choice, do we?" He kissed her on the forehead. "I can't go another two weeks without seeing this face." Blair smiled and he leaned in and kissed her again. When he pulled back, she eyed him curiously.

"So. Now you have to tell me..."

"My attorney, Blair. She's my attorney."

A look of relief crept onto her face and she finally understood the situation. Dan tried to suppress a laugh. "You really thought I was dating someone? In the middle of a divorce and a pregnancy? You have quite the overactive imagination."

"Well, someone sent me an anonymous picture of the two of you yesterday. And truthfully, it didn't look all that innocent to me." She said with just a touch of indignation. "Why were her fingers in your hair?"

Dan chose not to answer the question, since he honestly didn't know. "So now you're getting anonymous texts and mine have stopped? Weird." Dan still didn't understand who was sending them or what the motive was. It could have been Serena, but then she truly didn't seem to recognize Megan when she walked up. Not that it would matter, but she wasn't that good of an actress. Chuck, Serena, and Jenny were all officially ruled out.

"Well isn't it obvious? Your sister got bored messing with you and now she's set her sights on me. Typical Jenny Humphrey." Dan didn't bother to argue with Blair. It was better she thought the person responsible was Jenny rather than some deranged stalker.

"What time is it?" She suddenly asked. Dan looked at his watch. "Uh five til eight. Oh damn."

"Oh damn," Blair echoed. "The preview is about to start."

"And I'm sure Megan's going to wonder where I've disappeared to." He quickly flung his jacket on.

Blair rolled her eyes and leaned down to put her pumps back on. "By the way Humphrey, every time I looked over she was touching you. Please tell her to keep her hands off." Dan grinned.

"In case you haven't noticed, I'm kind of into brunettes at the moment. Bitchy ones." He pulled Blair in for one last lingering kiss, and then gave her lower stomach a quick caress.

"You know, his heart is going at eight-eight beats per minute right now? How amazing is that?" Blair's eyes lit up and she placed her hands over Dan's.

"I have my first doctor's appointment next week." Dan shook his head. He desperately wanted to go, but he knew it probably wouldn't be the wisest thing to do. "We're pretending it's for Dorota."

"Poor, Vanya." Dan exclaimed. Blair smiled again and he began to tickle her and nuzzle his head in her neck.

"Mmm. Humphrey, I really have to go." She giggled, fighting him off. "I'm supposed to be onstage!" She finally managed to push him away.

"Tomorrow," Blair started, catching her breath, and giving him one more quick kiss before exiting, "I'll come to you," she promised, biting her lip. Dan watched as she quickly reached for the door and disappeared.

"Tomorrow," he whispered.

Blair made her way to the Music Room where Jenny and Eleanor were already on stage. She rushed up to join them just as Jenny started to take the podium, having been introduced by Georgina Chapman.

"Darling, where have you been?" An exasperated Eleanor asked through gritted teeth. Blair said nothing as she watched Dan appear in the back of the room. He tried to suppress a smile as he watched Blair up on stage. Blair grinned back, but that grin turned into a scowl as she watched Megan dash to his side and lock her arm into his.

"Thank you, Georgina." Jenny's nerves seemed to have subsided. "We are pleased to be here tonight in support of such a great cause. And we're also delighted to be able to give you a special sneak preview of Waldorf Designs' new Millennia menswear line. But first, it's my pleasure to introduce the woman behind the label. Please welcome to the podium, Eleanor Waldorf!" Eleanor gave a quick wave to the crowd, as she walked over to join Jenny.

"Thank you, Georgina, for all the work that you do. And for allowing Waldforf Designs to be a part of this glorious event. We are honored to be in such illustrious company. On behalf of Waldorf Designs, it is my pleasure to present to you this check for one million dollars, to the Global Clean Water Crisis fund." Through the roar of applause, Eleanor and Georgina Chapman posed for a picture as she handed the check over to the chairwoman of the event.

Dan, standing at the back of the room, applauded and was caught off guard by a tap on his shoulder.

"I didn't miss anything did I?" Rufus looked as if he'd just run a marathon. He spotted Megan standing next to Dan and gave him a curious look.

"Uh, no. Just started." He then whispered, "Megan." Rufus was slightly surprised, but gave him the thumbs up sign right as the lights began to dim followed by the upbeat intro to 'Ghosts n' Stuff' by deadmau5 and Rob Swire.

"And now," Jenny announced, "Waldorf Designs' new Millennia men's collection!" Jenny quickly cleared the stage and joined Eleanor and Blair in the wings as each model made his way down the runway, each garnering more applause than the last.

Eleanor turned to Jenny. "I think we've struck gold." Blair and Jenny gave each other a knowing look as the fifth model exited the stage. It was now time for Nate Archibald to make his debut on the catwalk and he confidently strode down the runway

Nate looked good. Really good. But, unfortunately, that wasn't a Waldorf Millenia suit he was wearing.

Serena watched intently from the back of the room, sipping on her champagne. She was talking to Andrea Campagna, the famous menswear designer. Her eyes turned back to the stage just as Nate came on, and a little smile flickered on her face. Andrea looked confused. Then incensed.

That was his design.

Blair turned to Jenny and Eleanor. Their mouths were wide open. Nate was completely oblivious as he flashed his golden smile to the crowd.

"Oh my God," Jenny cried.

"Oh. My. God," Eleanor echoed. "This is a disaster!"

A collective hush spread over the room as people turned to each other, whispering. Nate stood at the edge of the stage for a moment before doing a three point turn. He was completely engrossed in what he was doing. Finally, he pressed his hands together, giving a bow of thanks to the crowd. He then waved graciously before walking back down the catwalk and exiting stage right.

"What is the meaning of this?" Eleanor turned to Jenny, furious.

"I have no idea...I'm sure there's a perfectly good explanation—" Jenny stammered.

"Well, I suggest you find it! Along with another job. Because you are fired!" Eleanor stormed off, leaving a lingering scent of Chanel in her absence.

Jenny didn't know what to say. Tears were forming in her eyes. "Blair I—"

"Save it, Little J," Blair retorted with a venomous glare.

"Blair, you can't possibly think I would be responsible for something like this! I mean, this project has my name on it, too. I've poured my heart and soul into this Millennia project and this event!" Jenny's voice cracked. She was completely devastated.

It didn't take much for Blair's intuition to kick in. Jenny was telling the truth. She had never been a fan of self-sabotage when it came to her work. She sighed. "Well, if you didn't do it then who did?" Blair questioned, still not letting Jenny just off the hook just yet. Jenny shook her head.

Blair's eyes then drifted from Jenny as she caught sight of Serena in the distance. She saw her whisper something to a now furious Andrea Campagna. The designer appeared flustered beyond words. Blair watched as Serena smirked. She was surveying the crowd like the cat that ate the canary. Blair's brown eyes remained glued upon Serena's form, watching as she covertly walked out the side door. It then became clear as to who was the guilty party.

"Of course." A confused Jenny watched as Blair quickly turned on her heel and made a beeline for the exit, making her way back through the now completely vacated Garden Court. She looked around trying to determine where Serena was most likely to go, and then raced to the Reception Hall, where there were a few workers setting up post show refreshments.

Blair spotted her instantly. Serena was speaking to a Frick representative, apparently giving her some last minute instruction. As soon as the woman walked off, a livid Blair walked up behind Serena and roughly yanked her by her arm.

"Ow!" Serena yelped, turning around to face Blair.

"You insipid, vindictive little bitch. I know you're behind this!" Blair announced angrily as waiters and caterers looked on in shock.

"Get your hands off of me, Blair!"

"You switched the suits! Really, Serena? It makes perfect sense. You never were one to exercise class. So...what? Your husband leaves you and now you're going to just take it out on anyone in the blast zone? Do you even realize what you've just done?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Serena feigned innocence with an edge of defiance.

"Oh, don't even try to deny it. You're the only one that has any motive to pull something so heinous."

"You sure about that? Because last I checked, you weren't exactly the most liked individual in Manhattan. Or have you not read the string of comments on the Page Six article about you kissing my husband. Which one was my favorite? Oh, yeah: 'That husband stealing whore. She already hooked a Bass, isn't that enough? Face it Blair, I'm not the only one on this island that would love to have a front row seat to the highly publicized fall from your undeserved pedestal. Your selfish behavior has managed to destroy two marriages. Oh wait. I forgot about Louis. Make that _three_."

"You think _I'm_ selfish? I didn't destroy anything! You, however, didn't just ruin our preview, you humiliated Nate as well. But I'm sure that means nothing to you as it's always what Serena wants first!"

"Sorry, but I don't take morality lessons from selfish whores who steal other people's husbands." Serena began to turn around and walk off.

Blair scoffed. "You can't be serious. You are, invariably, the biggest lying, hypocrite I've ever had the displeasure of knowing. Does this ring a bell? 'Oh Nate! How would you know what it feels like to sleep on a cloud? Giggle, giggle, insert pathetic, mediocre attempts at flirtation here.'" Serena's mouth fell as Blair mocked her, recalling that fateful December night in Nate's guesthouse when she was searching for her husband. The same night Dan had asked her for a divorce. "The only _selfish whore_ I see here, Serena, is _you_."

Serena remained silent, her mind trying desperately to find a viable explanation for Blair knowing such intimate details about that night. Her heart had dropped to the pit of her stomach as her anxiety piqued. Sure Dan knew about the "one night stand," but Blair was getting specific now. Serena swallowed hard. "Where did you hear…did Nate tell you?"

"Nate?" Blair laughed. "No. Nate didn't tell me anything. I heard it. All. I did feel sorry for him having to listen to you, though. Your pathetic attempt to seduce him. Now that was just...sad." Serena was again silent.

"You...heard?" Serena couldn't comprehend what Blair meant. "What do you mean you heard?"

"Dan and I overheard you two talking-it was right after he got done fucking my brains out." Blair smirked while Serena processed the information. Blair's hormones were officially raging now and she was now officially speaking before thinking.

"You...and Dan. You were in the guesthouse?" Serena pursed her lips together, suddenly feeling sick to her stomach for a variety of reasons. "Well, then you also know that nothing happened."

"Do I?" Because I'm pretty sure I overheard Nate say that something _did_ happen between you two before anything ever happened between Dan and me!"

Serena shook her head. She wasn't going to be bullied. "Enough, Blair," Serena demanded.

"What, now you're the only one that gets to play innocent?" Blair was loving this. She could practically see Serena's heart beating through her gown.

Serena was tired of the games. She had more pressing matters to attend to, including finding Nate. "Whatever, Blair. I don't have time for this. I have an event to host."

"Of course you do. And I intend to promptly return you to the festivities in all your washed up 'It-girl' glory. Now, I'm sure the rusted wheels in your underused brain are probably doing more work than you're familiar with, so I'll make this simple. Either you go and announce to that room of distinguished guests that you switched the suits, or that thing you think no one knows about regarding you and Nate, gets an anonymous tip to Page Six."

Serena downed her glass of champagne. There was no way she was going to fess up to switching the suits. Especially now that she knew about Dan and Blair sexing it up that night at Nate's Christmas party. And there was absolutely no proof that anything had happened between her and Nate. Eavesdropping didn't count. Even if Blair did go to the media, it would all be hearsay. No New York Post reporter worth their salt would publish such a high profile story without concrete proof to back it up. So, she was more than willing to call Blair's bluff. "I'm not going to do that, Blair. What I will do, however, is do everything in my power to make sure Chuck gets full custody of your son. Because you are one sorry excuse for a mother. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and co-mingle with the adults." Serena turned toward the exit.

And with that last comment, Blair lunged at Serena, knocking her forward into a table of champagne flutes. Two waiters looked on in horror, one running out of the room, presumably to get help; Or security. A shocked Serena stood up and turned to look a Blair. Her lip snarled and she lunged right back at Blair, sending her staggering backwards. Blair was incensed now as ran back over to the table and reached for a glass of champagne throwing it directly into Serena's face.

"That is it, Blair!" Serena shouted, as she returned the compliment, splattering the Marchesa with champagne.

"You're going to pay for this, Serena!" Blair screamed.

Their shrieks could be heard all the way through the Garden Court and beyond, and seconds later a group of party goers including Dan, Nate, Rufus, Lily, Jenny, and Eleanor had made their way into the Reception Hall, looking on in shock. Megan was also in the crowd, looking on curiously.

Dan rushed over to Blair and pulled a champagne flute out of her hands just as she was about to give Serena another douse, wrapping his arms around her to try and restrain her, her legs kicking and flailing, while Nate attempted to do the same with Serena.

"She switched the suits, Dan!"

"Prove it you backstabbing bitch. You can bet your life I'll be pressing charges against you for assault!" Serena seethed as Nate prodded her in the direction of the 70th street Garden.

"And _I'm _pressing charges against _you_ on behalf of everybody for singlehandedly bringing down the entire IQ level of Manhattan!" Blair screamed back as Dan attempted to steer her to the exit.

Georgina, having just gotten to witness the Blair and Serena showdown firsthand, emerged from the shadows, sipping her champagne. Hearing Dan and Blair approaching, she set down her champagne flute and quickly made her way out the door and onto the street.

Dan urgently prodded Blair out the door and into the cold night air. "I can't leave now, Humphrey!" she protested, and Dan swung Blair around to look at him.

"Blair, what were you thinking?" He was stern. Blair went quiet, realizing he was right. Picking a fight with Serena, getting into physical blows with her-it was a stupid thing to do in her condition.

"Blair," he said pleadingly. "You don't need this kind of stress. I want you to go home. Please," he said, caressing her face and warming up her bare arms. Blair said nothing, but nodded. He wanted to kiss her, but there were eyes everywhere. He already had no idea how he was going to explain this to Megan.

"Which car is yours?" he asked, and she nodded to one parked a few yards away. Dan walked her over to the car, opening the door for her. He couldn't help himself, though. Just like on New Year's, he suddenly didn't care who was watching. He leaned in and gave her a lingering kiss, which she gladly reciprocated, placing her arms around his neck and pulling him in tightly. When they parted, she looked up at him, biting her lip.

"Fine. I'll leave. But only because I can't be held responsible for my actions." Dan grinned as Blair stepped inside the town car, her eyes never failing to leave his. "If you can drop my coat off for me I'd be _greatly_ appreciative," she said suggestively. He nodded, then closed the door behind her, giving her one more wave. She watched as Dan walked back toward the entrance of the museum.

"Ahem." A startled Blair turned around at the sound of a woman seated next to her clearing her throat. She had a book held up in front of her, blocking her face. _Anna Karenina_.

"Excuse me. I think you're in the wrong car!" Blair blurted out in agitation.

Georgina removed the book from in front of her face, and Blair's mouth fell open. "Actually, I think I'm in the right car. Hello, niece," Georgina grinned.

"Long time no see."

* * *

**I thought you guys could use a little vacation from Henry:)**

**Thanks to everyone who is still reading and following this story, and thank you for all of the overwhelmingly positive feedback. It's very much appreciated! Much thanks to my beta, VampSlaying101 for helping to guide this story along.**

**A big XOXO to all of you!**


	18. Chapter 18

**So sorry it took me so long to get this one posted. Hopefully you haven't lost interest while you wait. Without further ado...**

* * *

Chapter 18

"Georgina!?" Blair was simultaneously confused and irritated. "Great! Just when I thought this night couldn't possibly get any worse!" Blair huffed in exasperation. "Why are you here? Did you get deported? From..._Australia_?" Blair crossed her arms, a look of disgust on her face as the car began to slowly descend into the traffic on East 70th street.

Georgina calmly tilted her head to the side. It was dark inside the car, but her twinkling blue eyes were easily visible.

"Good to see you, too, Blair. And to answer your question, no, I didn't get kicked out. Not yet anyway." Georgina winked. "The Aussies are a benevolent and forgiving people. Truthfully though, they're exhausting. Each one I come in contact with becomes inexorably obsessed with me. New York is my safe haven," she explained, tossing back her long auburn hair.

"Please," Blair scoffed as she rolled her eyes. "An angry mob with torches and pitchforks does not equate to obsession. Only self-preservation."

Georgina shot her an icy glare. It was just like old times.

"Anyway," Georgina continued, choosing to change the subject. "I'm not sure why you say the evening went so poorly. Yes, the fashion show was a complete disaster and you probably won't get one order for your new men's line, but that little throw down between you and Serena was well worth the price of admission." She paused for a moment, recalling the flying champagne flutes and the scrambling waiters as she peeked out from her spot behind a philodendron pole. "At first I was concerned the height difference would be an overwhelming advantage for Serena, but you have some abnormally strong upper body strength for a person of your stature. You managed to catch Serena completely off guard. It was like watching a Capuchin monkey pick a fight with a giraffe. So kudos."

Georgina smiled in admiration as she conspicuously lay down the copy of "Anna Karenina" she had swiped from the table in Blair's entryway. Blair instantly caught sight of the book, noticing for the first time that it was the antique copy Dan had given her for Christmas.

"Where did you get that?!" Blair snapped as she grabbed the book from out of Georgina's reach, and wedged it safely between her and the door. "Were you in my house?" Blair's blood pressure was rapidly starting to rise. Georgina frowned.

"Oh calm down, Blair. Don't act like we're not related. We're allowed to make unexpected visits. It's what family does. I just stopped by to return Dorota's collection of "Vampire Academy" books to her. "And then I saw this beautiful book just laying there…'Anna Karenina.' The gripping tale of a family ripped apart by adultery. Sounds like a story _right_ up my alley."

"That book wasn't just 'laying' there, Georgina. It was in my room! If you come in my house again, I promise you that one of New York's finest will be there to escort you straight to Bedford Hills!"

Georgina pondered this for a moment. "Hmm. You make that sound strangely titillating. I may take you up on that one day. But for now, I really don't think you should be getting yourself worked up into a frenzy like this." Georgina raised an eyebrow and looked at her pointedly. Blair was immediately uncomfortable.

"_I really don't think you should be getting yourself worked up into a frenzy like this."_

Georgina's look. Georgina's tone. Georgina's choice of words. They were all even more disturbing than usual.

With the knowledge that she had been snooping around in her house, Blair did a quick mental inventory. Yes. She knew for sure that her Bentyl was in her purse. And she was being careful not to leave anything incriminating around that could potentially tip anyone off to her condition, her attorney in particular. Randall was now a frequent visitor to the penthouse, and ever since he had witnessed one of her nausea spells and subsequent mad dash to the bathroom, Blair was being particularly fastidious. No. There was no way Georgina could possibly have found anything. _Stop being so paranoid, Blair._

Georgina inspected Blair with great interest, her eyes lingering momentarily on Blair's stomach. She gave a sly smile. Blair swallowed nervously, trying to convince herself that despite what it looked like, Georgina was _not_ just staring at her stomach.

"I must say, Blair. You do look much better. Your complexion is absolutely flawless and you just seem to...oh what's the word I'm looking for? _Glow_."

Blair's breath caught for a moment. She was more than ready to nip this conversation in the bud. If Georgina really did know something, she was about to find out. She sat up straight and cleared her throat. "What exactly do you mean I _look_ better? Better than what exactly?" Georgina realized Blair was trying to call her bluff. But she wasn't quite ready to give her hand away. She preferred to keep the conversation at a slow simmer.

"Well, from those Page Six photos, pretty much anyone could see how much stress you've been under. Though your face was shielded in several of them by Dan's luscious locks." Georgina leaned over and gave Blair a gentle rub on the hand. Blair returned the gesture with a scowl.

"So tell me, B. What is the secret to your renewed health? Is it Dorota's famous smoothies or Dan's _massive_-"

Blair's eyes widened as she jerked her hand out of Georgina's grasp. "Driver!" Blair shouted up at the gray haired man navigating the vehicle. She slid herself down the seat as far away from Georgina as she could. "You may let this woman out now!"

"Actually, no. This is definitely not my stop. As you were." Georgina was cool and composed as she motioned for the driver to continue on.

Blair heaved a sigh and turned away, staring out the window. She crossed her arms and banged her head up against the glass.

"Look, Blair. I have a little confession to make." Blair cut her eyes in Georgina's direction. She just couldn't wait to hear what flew out of her mouth next.

"I've actually been in town since just after New Year's. Collecting information. Watching you and Chuck at the park with Henry. Snapping pics of Dan with his foxy new lawyer-who by the way bears an uncanny resemblance to Serena. Just doing the whole Veronica Mars thing."

Blair was incensed. And creeped out. "So you've been stalking us?"

Georgina thought about this for a moment, and then nodded. "Yep. Guess I have."

"You truly need professional help," Blair scoffed. It was bad enough that Georgina had been snooping in her house, rifling through her things. But she had been stalking them, too. Blair was silently berating herself. The pictures she and Dan had received via anonymous texter-it should have been instantly obvious who was responsible. Perhaps if she hadn't been so distracted with everything, she would have been able to figure out whose grubby little fingers were behind them.

Georgina put on the most sincere face that she could. "Please understand that I only did it out of concern for you. For both you and Dan actually. But more for Dan." Georgina paused for a moment. "And for you." She paused again. "But mostly for Dan." Blair crinkled her nose, wanting more than anything for Georgina to Just. Stop. Talking. She was starting to feel sick to her stomach now. This conversation was positively dizzying.

"I needed to make sure that I could trust you and that it was truly over between you and Chuck this time. Because if it wasn't..." Blair was glaring at her. "Anyway, having watched you for the past few weeks, I am secure in the knowledge that your marriage is officially and finally kaput."

Blair made a face. "You were taunting us with anonymous text messages Georgina. I really don't see how that plays into the whole 'trust' thing."

Georgina gave a small nod. "Fair point. But it was all in good fun. And here I am owning up to it. No harm no foul." Blair rolled her eyes.

"Well. As honored as I am that you took the time to 'Single White Female' me, it doesn't mean that I want to hang out with you now. I'm sure you're aware that my divorce will be a messy one. So, I will have no time to indulge in jello shots or partake in 'Cougar Town' marathons with you."

"Yes. I am aware. Your divorce _will_ be messy. But you know what the best part of a messy divorce is? When it gets down right filthy." A self-satisfied Georgina sat back in her seat and crossed her legs. From where Blair was sitting, she looked like Satan's mistress. She was torturing her now, sending her a message. Georgina could practically see the wheels turning in Blair's head-and it was absolutely intoxicating.

"You know," Georgina continued, "at first I really wasn't sure about you and Dan as a couple again. I mean, technically I _was_ the one responsible for getting you both together in the first place. So I understood the potential. I encouraged Dan to kiss you on Valentine's Day all those years ago," she said wistfully, thinking back to that fateful night at Nate's party. "But then you had to go and kamikaze the poor Humphrey's heart and run away to Monte Carlo without so much as a phone call." Her voice was infused with faux emotion as she feigned a tear wipe. "I received some residual guilt from that. And, of course, a free trip to Tuscany. But then, the clouds parted and everything seemed to sort itself out. You married Chuck, and I mean, how many guys get to settle for Serena van der Woodsen as their consolation prize?"

Blair frowned. She was one hundred percent ready to relinquish her title of "crazy bitch" to this woman if it meant getting her to shut up.

"But let's get real, Blair. It was painfully obvious that Dan never got over you. I could have predicted last year there would be problems when he couldn't stop looking at you during his own wedding ceremony."

Blair let out an exasperated sigh. "Georgina! Is there a point to any of this?"

Georgina took an extended pause. "Yes," she finally began. "There is. Blair, even though technically I'm your Aunt, you and I are more like sisters. Kindred spirits. Soul twins. We have infinite things in common-we both have sons, personality disorders, and a history of mutual lovers including but not necessarily limited to Dan, Jack, Chuck." At that moment Blair started to gag.

"What I'm trying to say is that I know now that I can count on your assistance."

Blair stifled a laugh. "I'm sorry. My _assistance_? Put down the crack pipe, Georgina. I wouldn't _assist_ you by handing you a Kleenex if you sneezed." Georgina shot her a look. Blair's reaction was completely unacceptable. She pursed her lips together slowly, pushing a wayward strand of hair back behind her ear.

"Blair, aren't you forgetting a little favor you still owe me?"

"Come again?" Blair snorted. "Exactly what favor would that be?"

"The dowry, Blair. Don't tell me you've already forgotten about that massive fail of a marriage to Louis I helped you escape?"

Blair rolled her eyes. "No. You _said_ you were going to help me, remember? But then Chuck paid the dowry. As I recall you did nothing."

"And just who do you think convinced him to pay it? That's right. C'était moi. And now here we are again. It really is quite astonishing how you continue to get yourself into these sticky situations, Blair. Though I have to say, you've added quite the 'telenovelic' twist to the proceedings this time around."

Blair shook her head in confusion-confusion over Georgina's dowry explanation as well as the last little jab that would only make sense if she knew a certain something which Blair was all but certain she didn't. "Georgina, I'm pretty sure Chuck didn't need any convincing to pay the dowry! Moreover from you!"

Georgina shrugged nonchalantly. "If you say so. I guess the only way to find out for sure would be to ask him. I'm game if you are. Though I must warn you, lately it's like I've had no control over anything I say. Every thought that pops into my head immediately pops right on out of my mouth. I've just been spilling beans here, there and everywhere." Blair went silent as she tried to process Georgina's hidden threat.

"What exactly do you want, Georgina?" Blair asked, completely fed up by the conversation.

"What I really want_, _Blair, is to make all of your Humphrey dreams come true. But I have dreams as well. And I think it's only fair that if I help you, you help me in return."

"And just exactly what is it that you want me to do?"

Georgina raised an eyebrow. She almost had Blair where she wanted her. "I want you to pledge your support to me, Blair. Emotional, financial. Inspirational. Because like you, I too seek to let a Bass off the hook. Though not literally. It's sad, but Jack and I are no longer compatible." Blair shook her head at Georgina. As if the situations were even remotely similar.

"As you probably know, I signed a prenuptial agreement which will leave me destitute if I were to walk away from my marriage," Georgina explained.

"That's because the prenup was the only way Jack would have ever married you," Blair snidely shot back.

Georgina pondered this for a moment. "That may be true, but still. I am not leaving this marriage empty handed. And that's where you come in."

Blair was once again resistant. "As I already told you, I have enough to deal with."

Georgina sighed and leaned back against the seat. "Blair, why are you being so stubborn when I have information that can help you in your divorce?"

Blair's interest was instantly piqued, though she tried to refrain from showing that to Georgina. "What kind of information?" She asked cooly.

"The kind of information that could get you full custody of your son and a divorce by the end of the month." Blair's mouth fell open. There was no way Georgina could pull off such a feat.

Or could she...?

Blair cleared her throat. "Well. Why don't you just share with me the information you have. I'll evaluate it, and if I judge it to be helpful then you shall have my full unwavering support during your divorce proceedings with Jack."

Georgina shook her head in amusement. "Do you think I'm some dim witted dolt, Blair? What I have is top secret information. Before I tell you a thing, I'll need you to sign some documents for me. Blair watched as Georgina began to pull out paperwork from her oversized Gucci. "First we have the confidentiality agreement."

Blair scoffed. "Noooo. Forget it, Georgina. I am not signing anything."

Georgina looked up. "Fine." She shrugged. "Then you won't be getting the information I have that could make this entire mess go away and send you into domestic euphoria with Dan. Who knows? With this information, you two could even be married by the time the little Humphrey is born."

And whoomp, there it was_._ Blair was paralyzed with shock as she locked eyes with Georgina.

"Whoops." Georgina grinned. "You really should try and keep a tighter grip on those nausea meds. Especially when you're in the ladies room at Le Cirque." Blair closed her eyes, remembering the exact incident that Georgina was referring to.

"So," she continued, "are we hoping for a girl this time around? Can you imagine? A little porcelain doll with big doe eyes, dark curly hair and a little red headband. How disgustingly sweet," Georgina quipped as she roughly shoved the papers back into her purse. She looked up right as the car was pulling up in front of the Waldorf penthouse. "Oh look. It's your stop." Blair was now caught between a rock and a hard place.

"Well, Blair. I can see that your vocal cords have decided to go on hiatus, so here's what I'm willing to do. I'm going to give you twenty-four hours to mull this over. But realize that if you don't get on board with me, I'll have no choice but to go to Page Six with an exclusive." Georgina pretended to think for a second. "Oh wait. Make that two exclusives. You and Dan weren't very quiet earlier. I can already see the headline. 'Fricking at the Frick: The Sexual Adventures of Dan Humphrey and Blair Waldorf Bass.' Don't feel bad, though. Surprisingly enough, you two weren't the only ones who thought a museum office would make a good spot for a quickie."

Blair was completely traumatized as she grabbed her book and slowly began to exit the vehicle. Against her better judgment, she turned back around to look at Georgina.

"Oh, and I will be needing the car for a little while longer. I have a few more stops to make. I know you won't mind." Georgina smiled. "And B? I'm sure I don't have to tell you, but best not mention this conversation to Dan. We both know how anxiety prone he can be. Looking forward to hearing from you! Tata." And with that, Georgina gave a wave and closed the door.

A few snowflakes fell as a shaken Blair shivered in the cold night air, watching as the car pulled away.

She was officially fucked.

* * *

"Dan? Is everything okay?" A smiling Megan ran up to intercept him as he attempted to inconspicuously beeline back in the direction of the Garden Court in search of Jenny. The show was still going on, but thanks to the unfortunate incident of Nate wearing an Andrea Campagna suit while modeling for Waldorf, and Blair and Serena's subsequent champagne showdown in the Reception Hall, a number of people had already left the Music Room to mingle and gossip.

"Oh, hey. Megan. Wh.. uh yeah. Everything...I mean everything's fine," Dan said, albeit not very convincingly. "Just a, uh, a typical evening on the Upper East Side." He was hoping Megan would leave it at that as he swiped a champagne flute from a passing waiter's tray and chugged it down mercilessly. "I actually, really need to find my sister so if you'll ex-"

"Not so fast, Dan Humphrey. I think we need to discuss something, don't you?" Dan noticed there was a significant change in Megan's tone. Her perkiness and effervescence had all but evaporated. He knew he was in trouble. _Shit._

"We...we do?" Dan asked innocently.

"Yes," she replied firmly, hand on hip, "we absolutely do."

"Um, okay..." Dan braced himself for the impending tongue lashing. Megan was glaring at him now, tapping her toe in disapproval.

"I'm just so very disappointed in you, Dan."

Dan flinched at her choice of words. Disappointed? Was he in elementary school?

"I'm...sorry?" He took a quick breath, his eyes drifting around the room to try and avoid her piercing gaze. He was growing more and more uncomfortable by the second.

"You've broken our trust, Dan. I can no longer represent you."

Dan was speechless. He knew that she wouldn't be happy about him escorting Blair out of the party, but did that automatically mean she had to drop him as a client? "What? Why...? Is this...I mean I assume this is about what happened with Blair and Serena? Because I was just trying to...you know, break up the fight." Dan felt his explanation was a valid one.

"Dan, I'm going to be completely honest here. I think you and Blair are still seeing each other." Megan sounded like a scorned wife. It was a little off putting and Dan wasn't sure what to say, but knew he needed to handle the situation delicately. And quickly. He couldn't lose his attorney.

"Megan, I promise you this was the first time Blair and I have seen each other in two weeks. We've had absolutely no contact until tonight." It may not have been the whole truth, but it wasn't a lie. "But that doesn't mean I want to see her or Serena injured or...or arrested for creating a public disturbance," Dan said honestly.

Megan wasted no time with her rebuttal. "Dan, I thought I made myself clear at Five Leaves the other night. Any contact with Blair Bass, no matter how innocuous you believe it to be, is completely unacceptable." Dan nodded apologetically. "I know. You're absolutely right. I...I should have just let someone else handle it. I assure you that if I ever find myself in this situation again, I'll just walk the other way. Stay completely out of it." Dan silently prayed that this would pacify her, but Megan continued to eye him suspiciously. She tilted her head to the side, before finally letting a smile escape from her lips.

"You're a chivalrous man, Dan Humphrey. No wonder all the women love you." Dan was caught off guard if not blushing from the compliment. It definitely wasn't the response he was looking for, but he would take it. He was officially in the clear now. "But we definitely need to...talk about things," Megan added. She reached up to delicately straighten his tie, something Dan was starting to learn that she really enjoyed doing.

"I think we need to review proper divorce etiquette."

"Um, 'divorce etiquette?'" Dan was petrified at what that might entail. Megan nodded eagerly. "I actually took a workshop with Susan Wakefield once and received some invaluable information. Information that I think would benefit you greatly." As if he knew who Susan Wakefield was. Dan could feel his palms starting to sweat. "Um, okay..."

Megan smiled brightly, her bubbly persona swiftly snapping back into place. "Terrific! My place. Tomorrow night. I took a few cooking classes when I was in Spain where I perfected my Paella and I'm eager to test it out on someone!"

Dan looked at her in confusion. _Her place_...

"Do you, uh...I mean is that...is that really appropriate you think? Dinner at your place?" Dining in public was one thing, but having your attorney cook for you was a bit unusual. Megan let her arms drop to her side, insulted. "Appropriate? I'm not sure what you mean. But as I told you, this..." she said, motioning between herself and Dan, "is all about trust, Dan. The quicker we get to know each other, _understand_ each other, the less painful your divorce will be. I need to understand exactly who Dan Humphrey is. The Colliers always try to take a personal interest in their clients. My father says, 'you must build a bridge of trust.' He regularly flies his clients to the Cape for weekend getaways. And my uncle attended some of your father's Lincoln Hawk reunion concerts when he was representing him." Dan could see what Megan was getting at, but that didn't make it any less weird. But maybe, just maybe, he was slightly overreacting. Just one dinner wouldn't hurt.

"Um, okay," Dan said, finally relenting. He needed to get through this divorce any way he could and placate his attorney through any means possible. He couldn't afford to lose her representation. Plus right now he had other business to attend to. Accepting Megan's dinner invite would be the only option.

"Look," Dan explained, "I really, _really_ need to go see if Jenny's okay. But uh, I guess I'll see you tomorrow night. At your place." It sounded weird saying it, and he knew he'd have to work overtime to keep this information from getting back to Blair. Dan began to walk off, but Megan caught him by the arm. She looked up at him sincerely. "I'm sorry I came down so hard on you. It's just, I want to do the best job I possibly can for you. My first client. The pressure is on, you know?"

Dan nodded. "I understand completely. And thank you." They stood in uncomfortable silence for a moment as Megan continued to gaze up at him, Dan looking anywhere else. He finally excused himself once again. "Well. I will see you tomorrow night," he said politely before turning on his heel.

Megan smiled ambiguously as she watched Dan disappear into the crowd.

* * *

Serena was in a full on rage of fury as Nate pushed her outside the door and into the Frick's Fifth Avenue garden.

"How dare she, Nate! Did you see her? I am _so_ pressing charges. How dare she attack me? She's completely out of control!" Nate released Serena from his grip as she turned around to face him, expecting to get at least a little sympathy from him, but his facial expression made it clear that she wasn't going to get anything of the kind.

"Really, Serena?" Nate was cold, his tone slightly condescending. His normally sunny demeanor had been replaced with the look of someone who had rooted for the wrong team one too many times and was officially fed up. "You ruined the Waldorf preview. Just how did you expect her to respond?"

Serena was completely defiant.

"It was a _mistake_, Nate! They've probably already explained to everyone that there was a mix up with the suits and, chances are, nobody will even remember this in the morning."

For once Nate wasn't buying what Serena was selling. "It was hardly a simple mix up, Serena. You _seduced_ me so you could switch the garment bags. You made a fool out of me!" Nate already knew that Serena hadn't even considered how her little stunt would affect him and his career. He had worked hard to build up the Spectator and his reputation in this town, and he had done it all on his own without help from his father or grandfather. And in one night Serena had turned him into the laughing stock of Manhattan.

Serena sighed and shook her head. She wasn't ready to take complete ownership of the fiasco, but she didn't mind relenting just a tiny bit in order to drum up some support from Nate. "Fine. Maybe it wasn't exactly a 'mix up.' But Nate, I didn't mean...I mean I honestly wasn't thinking clearly. The stress of planning this gala. And this divorce...it's driving me to do things...I don't know. Maybe I've just been around Blair for so long that she's starting to rub off on me." Serena was throwing out every excuse in the book now in a desperate attempt to rationalize her actions. She attempted to make eye contact with the friend she'd had since childhood but he wasn't having it. It was clear just how hurt he was, and she was just now starting to feel a little guilty over it. Serena leaned over and softly touched him on the shoulder. He immediately jerked away.

"I can't believe you Serena! Trying to blame Blair for this? You've just become this bitter, selfish... What happened to you?" Nate asked, still inflamed and trying to make sense of everything. "The girl I knew would never stab a friend in the back like this."

Serena flung her arms in the air in frustration. "What happened to me!?" She screamed. "Dan Humphrey broke my heart. That's what happened to me!" She could no longer hold it in as the tears –genuine tears-fell freely down her heated cheeks. "I know it's not an excuse for what I did, Nate, and I'm so sorry. But you have to understand that my entire world has fallen apart."

Nate shook his head. "You're angry at Dan and Blair. I get it. But what did _I_ ever do but be there for you? And what about Jenny? You just killed her career." Serena was shaking uncontrollably now. The truth hurt.

"Nate-"

"No, Serena. What you have done is _unforgivable_." Nate began to turn around and walk back inside.

"Nate! Please! I can't take you walking out on me, too," she pleaded.

He turned back around, his face hot, his jaw clenched. "Could you please just stop making it about you, Serena?!"

She watched in anguish as Nate walked away from her. She slowly walked over to a nearby bench and collapsed upon it. Her face in her hands, she began to sob with regret. Regret over a life with Dan that never came to pass, her unsalvageable friendship with Blair, and last but not least Nate. The man who had supported her through thick and thin. And who would now probably never speak to her again.

* * *

Lily sipped on her gin as she stood alone in the Boucher room, staring out the window. Following Blair and Serena's altercation, word had quickly spread of Serena's abhorrent act. Lily now had two choices. Try to sneak out of the Frick unnoticed to avoid the whispers and judgmental stares, or go and find her daughter and wrangle an explanation out of her, because what Serena was being accused of doing wasn't at all pleasant. She was leaning toward the former option when a familiar figure appeared in the entry way, his shoes echoing off the hardwood floor.

She whipped her head around in surprise and saw Rufus standing there, hands in his pockets.

He eyed her curiously. "Don't you usually take your gin in a teacup?"

Lily closed her eyes in disdain. "I'm really not in the mood Rufus," she replied curtly.

"I completely understand. William seems to have gone off the grid again, Serena has just made a gigantic mess, and by association, put another dent in that _pristine_ reputation of yours. Not a good day to be a van der Woodsen, I suppose." An indignant Lily turned to face her ex-husband.

"Well, if Serena is acting out," Lily snarled, choosing to simply ignore the dig at her conveniently MIA husband, "I assure you it has _everything_ to do with what _your_ son has put her through."

Rufus shook his head. "So you're saying _this _is somehow all Dan's fault, too? Lily, at some point you're going to have to accept the fact that Serena did this all on her own." He paused for a moment before adding, "There is no one left to blame."

If looks could kill...

"Serena had everything she could have wanted. A marriage. A home. She was a supportive and faithful wife to _your_ son. And then he broke her!" Lily refused to look at Rufus now, keeping her eyes firmly planted on the window sill.

Rufus shook his head because Lily still didn't get it.

"Right. 'He broke her,'" Rufus replied sarcastically. "Is that really what you think?" Lily shot him another irritated look. "Listen, Lil. This may not exactly be the best time to tell you this, but what you said about Serena being a faithful wife-it's not exactly true."

Lily balked. "What exactly are you saying, Rufus? That Serena cheated on Dan?"

Rufus sighed, responding in the most genteel way possible. "You should probably go and talk to your daughter," he suggested pointedly. Lily eyed Rufus, bewildered by this new information, though not necessarily shocked by it. As much as she wanted to deny it, to tell Rufus he must be mistaken, she knew there was no point. It wasn't in his nature to make something like this up. "In fact, I'm off to do the same. If I can find her," Rufus added. "This was supposed to be Jenny's big night. I'm sure she's pretty humiliated right about now." Rufus started for the exit, but first turned back around, watching his ex-wife for a moment. She seemed to be deep in contemplation now. Rufus began to open his mouth to speak.

But there was nothing left to say.

* * *

"Miss Blair? That you?"

Dorota popped out of the kitchen to meet Blair at the elevator. Blair set her book down on the entryway table, still shell-shocked from her encounter with Georgina. There were a thousand different thoughts racing through her head-one more and she was certain it would explode. Georgina's threat to expose her secret to the world if she didn't comply with her demands had left her feeling powerless. Dorota flinched at the sight of Blair looking so disheveled in her Marchesa gown.

"Miss Blair, why you look like you just take left turn into tornado? And where your coat?" Dorota chastised. "It twenty-five degrees out and snowing!"

"I accidentally left it at the Frick," an exhausted Blair answered lethargically. She wanted to fall into bed, but she had a long night of thinking ahead of her. "How's Henry?"

"Out like light. He play Mini Ninjas and fall asleep in big bowl of popcorn." Blair smiled at the visual Dorota painted. "He tucked away safely in bed now."

Dorota's eyes suddenly narrowed in on her. "Um, Miss Blair," she whispered. "There someone here to see you." Dorota motioned in the direction of the living room. A tall woman with a tight brown bun, horn rimmed glasses and a clipboard was walking around.

"What... Who is that?" Blair asked tentatively.

"She say she with New York City Department of Social Services." Blair suddenly felt her racing. She was perplexed, trying to figure out just what an impromptu visit from a social worker at this time of night could possibly mean.

"Um..." Blair picked up her phone and began to frantically dial Randall's number, but it was too late. The woman had spotted her and was making her way into the foyer. "Mrs. Bass, I presume? I'm Miss Kelly, Department of Social Services." Blair cocked her head to the side indignantly.

"And just what is the meaning of this?"

Miss Kelly was stone faced as she calmly pulled out a document from her briefcase. "Mrs. Bass, I'm here to follow up on an anonymous report of child endangerment," the woman said as she pulled out a business card and handed it to Blair. "I'm going to need to have a look around."

"I beg your pardon?" Blair huffed. "Child endangerment? Is this some kind of a joke?" Miss Kelly shook her head briskly.

"Mrs. Bass, I can assure you this is not a joke. We take all of these reports extremely seriously. I am working in complete accordance with the law." She showed the document to Blair-it appeared to be a search warrant. Blair couldn't believe what she was hearing. Someone had actually accused her of endangering her child. It was beyond low. It was sick.

"But just so you know," Miss Kelly continued, "I will tell you that most anonymous complaints end up leading to absolutely nothing. So the sooner I look around the sooner I can leave you in peace." Miss Kelly's voice was prickly. She had the demeanor of someone who was overworked and underpaid and had no affinity for her job whatsoever. And she probably had a minimum of ten cats in her post war low rise walkup.

Blair looked over at Dorota who in turn was looking Miss Kelly over with a suspicious eye.

"Well. If you don't mind, I think I'm just going to phone my attorney first before letting a complete stranger come in and put her un-manicured little paws all over my things!" Miss Kelly heaved a sigh. Blair had just added another hour or so onto her work day. She rolled her eyes in annoyance as she watched Blair pick up her phone and dial Randall. He answered immediately.

"Blair?" Blair exhaled with relief. "Is everything okay?"

"Randall, thank God! There is a woman here saying she's from the New York Department of Social Services and she wants to look through the penthouse!" A disgusted Blair looked over at Miss Kelly who was now looking at her watch.

"Blair?" The tone of Randall's voice was alarming. "Does she have a warrant?"

"Uh, yeah. It...looks like a warrant. But how do I know if it's even authentic?" she asked as she cut her eyes back in the drab woman's direction.

"Okay, Blair. I'm on my way over. Tell her to hold on for a minute. Just try to stay calm and please, Blair. Try not to insult her." Blair bit her lip. It was a little too late for that. As Randall hung up, Blair looked over at the social worker.

"My attorney is on his way over," Blair said almost threateningly. Miss Kelly stood there watching her over her glasses.

Blair looked away. Someone was certainly going to pay for this-just as soon as she found out who that someone was. Chuck, Serena...or Georgina even? Maybe she would just take them all out.

Blair looked back over at Miss Kelly. She suddenly had a feeling of dread.

* * *

Jack leaned back in his chair as he perused a set of photos that he had of Georgina-pictures of her tearing up the racks at Bendel's, carrying garment and shopping bags. Chuck looked up from his documents and smirked. "Maybe we should call it a night so you can go track down your wife and interrogate her as to why she snuck out of the Outback without your approval?" Jack immediately shook his head.

"Nah. This is actually preferable. Besides. I have a feeling I know exactly where she is-at that Frick benefit. And I'd rather saw my own arm off and eat it than attend that thing." Jack shrugged. "Besides. I'll be able to use it against her later, if you catch my drift?" He gave Chuck a wink. Chuck let out a small laugh as he turned his attention back to the documents in question.

"Blair's probably there," Chuck mentioned casually. Jack rolled his eyes. "You're doing it again. Stop wallowing will ya? You've got a corporation to run."

Chuck sighed. "You're right. And you know, I just think there's gotta be a way to get Rich back as an investor. Maybe I should call him-offer him a buy in on the new Tokyo deal?" Jack looked up and instantly set his phone down.

"Why would you want to give a buy in to someone who turned his back on us and caused us to lose out on prime real estate in Hong Kong? Forget Rich. I heard he's been putting his money in some sort of dump down in the Caribbean, anyway. If the guy wants to think small let him. What you need to be doing, Chuck, is looking for new money. Young investors. Willing to take risks."

"But Jack, Rich has been solid for us. I just think that if I can talk to him, explain-"

Jack's phone rang and he quickly picked it up from off the desk. "Ah excuse me. Gotta take this." Chuck was bewildered by how quickly Jack stood up from his chair and abruptly made his way out of the office without even looking at the caller ID. It was ten-thirty at night. A Saturday night at that. A few seconds after Jack made his exit, Chuck got up from his desk and poked his head out the door. Jack was walking briskly down the hall. Before he was completely out of earshot, he heard Jack utter...

"_Good morning_."

Chuck furrowed his brow. Who in the hell was he talking to?

"Oh Randall. Thank God." Blair sighed with relief. She actually could have hugged him right then and there, but that might have been inappropriate.

"Randall Kinmont," he announced, introducing himself and offering his hand out to Miss Kelly, who begrudgingly shook it.

"Jane Kelly." Blair made a face. What a boring name.

"I suppose you want to see this," Miss Kelly continued, extending the warrant to Randall. Randall adjusted his glasses and began to read through the document thoroughly. Blair held her breath, watching him as a frown appeared on his face.

"This is a legitimate warrant, Blair. We need to allow Miss Kelly access to all of the bedrooms and all of the bathrooms."

"Why? What is she looking for?" Blair asked, speaking to Randall as if the woman wasn't even in the room. "Henry is asleep!"

"I'll be quiet. Now shall we get this over with?" Blair paused for a moment, taking her cue from Randall. He nodded and she hesitantly led the way up the stairs with Randall and Miss Kelly following closely behind, leaving a worried looking Dorota in their wake. Blair opened the door to her bedroom and flipped on the light, crossing her arms as the social worker made her way around, inspecting the contents of Blair's vanity, opening dresser drawers and looking through her closet. Every once in a while she would make a note on her clipboard. She nodded at Blair, indicating she was ready for the next room. Blair then led them through the shared bathroom and Miss Kelly immediately went to the medicine cabinet. Blair sighed in annoyance and Randall shot her a warning look. Blair knew there was nothing in there of any importance. Most of her items were still back at the apartment. It was just the principle of the matter. Miss Kelly eyed Blair and began to open the bathroom drawers, taking a moment to check each one thoroughly. She once again made a few notes on her clipboard.

"Everything looks good," Miss Kelly finally said. "Sorry to have disturbed your evening."

"It's just absurd and absolutely insulting that _anyone _can anonymously accuse someone of something as heinous as child endangerment! I would like to know just who filed this complaint so I may take them to court!" Blair demanded. Miss Kelly tightly gripped her clipboard to her chest.

"I'm afraid I'm not even privy to that information, Mrs. Bass. Now. If you don't mind I'm just going to have a quick peek into the child's room. No need to turn on the light." Randall nodded as the social worker opened the door and let herself into the room where Henry was sleeping soundly. Randall turned to Blair.

"Blair," he whispered. "You have got to try to keep your emotions in check. Remember anything you say can be used against you later!" he scolded. Blair nodded and took a breath, relieved that this nightmare appeared to be coming to an end soon. A minute later, Miss Kelly returned to the bathroom, a distressed look on her face. She appeared to be holding something in her hands.

"We have a problem." Blair and Randall watched as the social worker presented to them a plastic bag. A plastic bag filled with round, green pills.

"And just what is that?" Blair asked bluntly. Miss Kelly lifted up the plastic baggie.

"Well, Mrs. Bass. From the looks of it, it appears to be a plastic baggie of Oxycontin. I found it laying in the first drawer I opened." Blair's mouth fell open. "Are you insane? Do you honestly think I would just have a bag of pills haphazardly stashed in my son's bedroom?!" She looked over at Randall, a troubled look on his face which didn't automatically fill her with confidence.

"Mrs. Bass. You'd be surprised at just how frequently this happens. I can't tell you how many parents I've seen with drug problems who simply become reckless and forget where they've set they're 'stash' down." Blair was indignant at the judgmental tone in her voice.

"What!? This is ridiculous! I can assure you those are not mine!" Miss Kelly calmly turned to Randall. "I'm going to just need to step out and make a phone call." Blair could feel tears grazing the corners of her eyes. She thought for a moment. "I'm being set up." She turned to face Randall, a crazed look in her eye. "She's setting me up! You're setting me up!" she screamed after her. "Who are you working for?"

"Blair, calm down. This will all get sorted out." Blair got the feeling Randall was just telling her what she wanted to hear.

"How? I have never seen those pills in my life!" Blair was feeling nauseated now, and the next thing she knew she was dry heaving into the toilet. And suddenly she was full on puking. Blair knew this was certainly a sight for Randall to see, but she didn't care a this point.

"Blair," a concerned Randall said softly. "I'm going to go try and speak with Miss Kelly. I'll get Dorota to come help you." Blair didn't respond as she gripped the sides of the toilet. He walked out, closing the door behind him. She lay by the toilet for a minute before she was interrupted by a tiny voice.

"Mommy?" Henry was standing in the door frame, clad in his Batman pajamas.

"Hi, sweetheart," Blair sniffed. "I'm sorry I woke you."

"It's okay. Why are you sick?" Blair shook her head, unsure of what to tell him, because ultimately it was a combination of things. He walked over and felt her head, as if taking her temperature. "I think you have a fever, Mommy."

"Miss Blair?" Dorota poked her head around the door with, a glass of water in hand. Blair began to slowly rise from off the floor, though her legs felt like jelly. Dorota took a washcloth and wet it under the sink. She wipe Blair's face down. Blair then picked up the glass of water and took a long sip, then looked at her son. "You know what? I feel much better. I think it's time for you to go back to bed, okay?" Henry eyed her dubiously, but for once he was too exhausted to argue. He sweetly nodded, then ran back over to his bed. Blair sighed and looked at Dorota, closing the door to the bathroom so they were out of earshot from Henry.

"Dorota?" Blair asked. "Why was Georgina here earlier?" Dorota guiltily looked down at the floor.

"She drop by to return books to me." Blair took another sip of water. "Because I think she might have been the one to report met to social services. And when she was here I think she planted a bag of pills in Henry's room. The social worker just found them." Dorota looked at her in shock. "But that not impossible. Miss Georgina never come upstairs, Miss Blair." Blair looked at her, confused.

"But she had my copy of 'Anna Karenina.'" Dorota looked apologetically at Blair.

"Oh, Miss Blair. Mister Henry take book from room earlier. He like picture on cover. I mean to put back, but I guess I forget and then Miss Georgina come and talk and ask question and next thing I know she swipe-"

"Okay, okay. It's okay, Dorota," Blair said as she put her hand up to interrupt. So it looked like Georgina was telling the truth. For once. She could be eliminated from the list of suspects. Maybe. "And nobody else has been up here?" Blair was desperately trying to make sense of this. She was trying to remain calm as she smoothed her hair out, but her shaky hands were betraying her.

"No Miss Blair. No one." Blair nodded, tentatively reaching for the door knob. She didn't want to leave the bathroom, though.

Because deep down she knew what was coming next.

* * *

Dan was still trying to track down Jenny. He was just about to cut through the East Gallery to see if somehow she'd slipped past him and back into the Music Room when he was stopped in his tracks by the sight of a tall man talking on his cell phone. He had a boisterous, arrogant voice. "Chuck!" The man said. He didn't recognize the voice, but he definitely recognized the man. It was Patrick Van Heusen. Dan quickly shuffled backwards before he could be spotted, shielding himself in the passageway leading from the Oval room.

"I have great news," Van Heusen announced cockily. "Judge Hoskins just phoned me. I didn't get all the specifics but-" A curious Dan took a cautious step forward in order to eavesdrop.

"You were just granted temporary full custody of your son. The social worker is at Blair's right now. She'll be transferring him over to you within the hour." Dan closed his eyes. _Fuck_. Hell must have frozen over if Chuck was getting full custody of Henry.

"I have no idea but who the hell cares? You're getting your son!" Dan heard Van Heusen say emphatically. He could only guess that Chuck was asking the same question that he was. _How?_ "By the way, check your email. I sent you a little bonus prize. Got it off one of the waiters for ten grand. Your wife is like a pit bull. You better believe we'll be using that little piece of evidence when we go for full permanent custody!"

Dan shook his head. Of course someone had taped Serena and Blair. Dan had heard enough. He wasn't sure why, but he felt like this was happening to him. Like he'd been punched squarely in the gut. He was in a fog as he continued to digest the information. Dan quickly turned back in the other direction and back toward the front entrance. As much as he wanted to be there for his sister, there was somewhere else he needed to be right now. Jenny would understand.

* * *

"Jen?" Jenny was sitting in a vacant stairwell. She immediately looked up at the sound of her father's voice. Her cheeks were stained with tears and mascara and eyeliner. A lot of mascara and eyeliner. Rufus took a seat next to her, handing her a handkerchief in the process.

"Thanks." She sniffed.

"You know," Rufus said, giving his daughter a gentle pat on the back, "I think I'm in the market for a new suit. How do you think I would look in that first one? The pinstripe one?" Jenny smiled at her father's attempt to try and cheer her up.

"I think you-"

"Have no business wearing a double breasted suit," a bold voice suddenly interrupted. And that voice was unmistakably Eleanor Waldorf Rose's. Jenny and Rufus both looked up in surprise. "Jenny, I have been looking everywhere for you!"

"Um…" A flustered Jenny dabbed at her eyes with the handkerchief, trying her best to make herself presentable to her now former employer. "Rufus, I am certain that Jenny will have no trouble customizing a suit for you." Eleanor turned to Jenny. "Hmm?"

"I...definitely. Especially since I have spare time on my hands now."

Eleanor folded her arms up and frowned. "Oh stop feeling sorry for yourself! Is this how you're going to react every time I fire you?" Jenny looked up at her quizzically. If she didn't know any better...

"Eleanor, what exactly are you trying to say?" Rufus interjected as Eleanor sighed in exasperation.

"Do I have to spell it out for both of you? Georgina Chapman just apologized for the mix-up and explained that it was not a mistake by Waldorf Designs. Lars just went back out and modeled the real Milennia suit, _your_ suit, and it was extremely well received. I already have verbal orders from Mayor Bloomberg and Patrick Maloney."

Jenny thought she was going to cry again, only this time tears of joy.

"So I'm not fired?" Eleanor shook her head in confirmation. "But let me be clear. NO more surprise models. And never again will you take your eyes off the clothes!" That should have been a lesson Jenny was well versed in, but alas sometimes you have to learn the hard way-two or three times. "Now, we have work to do. I scheduled a showing for Bloomingdale's at the end of next week and Bridgette from Bergdorf's wants to take us to lunch on Monday." Eleanor began to hastily walk off down the long marble hallway while Jenny stood up and looked at Rufus in disbelief.

"Guess I'm going to go look for Dan now," Rufus said as he too stood up. He gave Jenny a hug.

"Well. Are you coming or not!?" A frustrated Eleanor shouted from the end of the hall.

Rufus smiled as he watched his daughter pull herself together and run towards Eleanor and the exit.

* * *

Blair's heart was thumping out of her chest as she walked down the stairs and into the living room. She had a seat across from a stressed out Randall as she looked around for Miss Kelly, who seemed to have gone, hopefully for good. And for a fleeting moment Blair felt relief. That is until she heard her attorney take a labored breath. "Blair, Judge Hoskins just phoned me."

"Um," she hesitated. "And...?" Her face was getting hot and she could feel herself tensing up. "He spoke with Miss Kelly. Henry has been ordered into Chuck's custody. Effective immediately. She'll be back shortly to escort him over to his father's." Blair covered her face with her hands. "The pills, Blair," he explained. "It was just too much to ignore."

She uncovered her face. "I'm being framed! Obviously someone is paying that woman off!" Blair screamed as tears began to trickle down her face. "Drug test me. I've never taken Oxy in my life! My husband on the other hand and-" Blair was livid now, and she suddenly had a flashback to what Serena had told her. "_What I will do, however, is do everything in my power to make sure Chuck gets full custody of your son. Because you are one sorry excuse for a mother."_

Serena...

Randall nodded sympathetically. What Blair was insinuating could be considered a stretch. But then again, this was the Upper East Side. He had seen it all. It wasn't really all that farfetched for a scorned spouse to plant drugs in order to gain the upper hand in a nasty custody dispute. However, he had witnessed some odd behavior from Blair. They're initial meeting, she seemed to have gotten sick as he was getting on the elevator. And then the same thing happened tonight. He wasn't sure what to think.

"Blair, I can assure you that drug testing will be the next step. You'll take a test, the truth will come out, and Henry will be returned to you. This is just temporary and there's already a hearing set for next week. When all is said and done, and if as you say the drugs aren't yours, this will have just been one minor setback. I promise."

Blair was getting frustrated with Randall. She wanted her attorney to get as angry as she was about the situation. Or at least act like he knew she was telling the truth. "But I still don't understand. Henry is obviously fine! He's asleep! Did _Miss Kelly_ even take that into consideration? We haven't even gone to court or anything. Chuck hasn't even responded to the petition. He hasn't even been by to see his son in two weeks! Nobody's even testified or-" Blair wiped tears from her face.

"I know," Randall said calmly, "but if the judge believes a child's immediate welfare is in jeopardy, he can order that child be moved to another location." Blair's lip was trembling. She felt completely gutted. Shocked. Confused. Angry. "But it's late!" she argued. "Am I supposed to just wake him up out of a sound sleep!?" Her voice was hoarse from exhaustion and she was choking on her tears.

"Blair, I just need you to stay as calm as possible right now for Henry's sake. This will all get sorted out soon enough. But right now we have no choice but to comply with the judge's order, okay? Now let's get Henry packed up and ready to go."

Blair glared at Randall. Oh it will get sorted out all right. With or without her attorney's help.

* * *

Serena hadn't moved from her spot on the bench since Nate had left her there an hour earlier. The tears had dried up and had been replaced with caked on makeup, dark circles, and blotchy red skin. This was not a version of Serena van der Woodsen that many got to see. Snow flurries were descending from the heavens as Lily walked outside and joined her in the garden.

"Where's your coat Serena?" Lily asked coarsely as she started to walk toward her daughter. "You're going to freeze to death."

Serena gave a lethargic shrug. "Then I guess I'll freeze."

Lily took a deep breath and exhaled. "Serena, this little 'woe is me' routine isn't helpful. You are the co-chair of this event. It is undignified for you to be sitting outside alone and pouting. Particularly when you helped to create one of the biggest debacles in recent Frick history."

Serena scoffed. "Are you actually lecturing me? The woman who was responsible for sending an innocent man to jail is lecturing me." Lily had a seat next to her daughter on the bench.

"I have made my share of mistakes in the past, Serena, but everything I did I did for you. Because I was trying to protect you and our family. And I have been duly punished for all of it. But what you did tonight was petty and immature, and served no purpose whatsoever but to alienate the entire Upper East Side community." Serena said nothing as her eyes fixated on the falling snow. Lily watched her, her eyes narrowing.

"Serena, did you have an affair?" Lily suddenly blurted. Serena closed her eyes and let out a small, painful laugh. It was all Lily needed to confirm that what Rufus had told her was true.

Lily was vexed. "So you've been lying to me this entire time?"

"It wasn't a lie," Serena shot back. "It wasn't an affair. It was a one-time thing. Nothing remotely comparable to what he's been doing with Blair!" Lily was dubious.

"So you're telling me you only slept with this person once?" Serena looked down at the ground. "Yes. Just once." Serena stated plainly.

Lily saw right through the lie. She picked up her clutch and began to stand up.

"Serena, I honestly don't know what to say. I have worked tirelessly to restore my reputation in this town, and in two minutes you have managed to embarrass me in front of the most important people in Manhattan. And on top of that, you lied to me about having an affair." She walked back toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Serena asked. Her mother wasn't the best company but all of a sudden she was dreading being left alone. Lily swung around.

"To try and do some damage control. Though I have no idea how I'm going to even _attempt_ to explain this!" Serena bowed her head. Her Miu Miu pumps were getting saturated with snowflakes. Without another word, Lily let herself back inside. She put her head down and quickly made her way through the Reception Hall, finding herself back in the entryway. A migraine was coming on fast and she had just begun to rub her temples when she ran head on into Rufus.

"Oh I'm-" Lily stopped when she saw who it was.

Rufus gave a look of understanding. "Well, apparently they made an announcement earlier explaining the mix-up. Eleanor gave Jenny got her job back and things have somehow managed to work themselves out." Lily was relieved to hear this, but knew that the damage wasn't even close to being undone.

"I'm happy to hear that," Lily said, stopping just shy of indifference.

Rufus rolled his eyes at her disaffected attitude. "Well, I was looking for Dan, but I think he may have snuck out the back. So I guess it's time for me to head home. Goodnight, Lil." He said sternly as he walked past her and headed for the door. Lily was suddenly in an internal battle with herself as she called out to him.

"Rufus?" Rufus turned around to see Lily nervously hiding her face behind her hand. "Do you perhaps...would you want to get a drink with me?"

* * *

The whole thing had been a blur for Blair.

She held on to Henry tightly before easing him into Randall's arms. Henry lay his head on Randall's shoulder, his soulful eyes blinking back at Blair. Blair clenched her jaw, trying to force herself not to cry. Randall had already explained that he would accompany Miss Kelly and Henry to Chuck's so he could schedule visitation. Up until the hearing, Blair would be allowed one hour of supervised visitation a day.

Fortunately for Blair, Henry was exhausted, otherwise he might have asked a few more questions. And Blair might have broken down sooner. Instead, she whispered to him that she'd see him tomorrow. She told him she didn't want him to catch what she had-that's why he was going to go stay with Daddy. She then kissed him on the forehead and tucked his T-Rex into his bag which was hanging off of Randall's arm.

Blair had maintained her composure. That is until she made eye contact with the social worker. "You should be ashamed of yourself," Blair said scornfully and Miss Kelly looked away. "Blair," Randall warned.

"Have a good evening, Mrs. Bass," the woman said dryly before stepping onto the elevator. Randall followed behind Miss Kelly. As he walked past Blair, he smiled at her, trying to encourage her to stay positive. "I'll pick you up tomorrow at noon. We'll drive over together so you can see Henry." Blair gave an emotionless nod as the elevator doors started to close. She took one last peek at her son, keeping her eye on him until the last hair on his little brown head was no longer visible.

That's when she lost it, sobbing into Dorota's arms. Dorota hurried her over to the couch.

"I call Miss Eleanor now. I sure she want to be here for you." Blair placed her hand on her head, thinking for a moment. "No. No I'll call her later," she said. "I think I'm just gonna go...I'm just..." Blair got herself up and walked to the stairs, ascending them slowly. Dorota looked on, concerned.

When Blair got to her room, she slowly got undressed, letting her gown drop down in a pile on the floor, not even bothering to pick it up. She then wrapped herself up in her robe before having a seat in front of the vanity. She stared at herself in the mirror for a few minutes. Blair was nearly catatonic as she began to calmly go through her nightly rituals. Taking off her jewelry. Removing her makeup. Brushing her hair.

This had been the worst day of her life.

Blair gently set her brush down and reached for her phone. She was just starting to scroll when she was interrupted by a knock on the door. It was Dorota.

"Here you go Miss Blair," she said cheerfully, setting down a tray of tea and toast. "Will calm nerves. Stress no good for you or baby. Also, someone here to see you." Dorota moved out of the way to reveal Dan standing behind her.

"Hey." He spoke softly, as not to alarm her. Blair looked up. "Thank you, Dorota, she said almost mechanically. Dorota exchanged a worried glance with Dan before seeing herself out. Blair closed her eyes, fighting back tears, as Dan sat down on the bench beside her, his arms completely enveloping her, holding her tightly. She was listless against him as he placed a kiss on her cheek. "Dorota told me what happened. I can't believe it. Just when I thought Chuck couldn't stoop any lower-"

"Yep," she said, looking up at him and starting to push him away. "But don't worry. This is just a little 'bump in the road' as they say." Dan eyed her curiously, reluctantly releasing her from his grip. Once again, her tone was eerily mechanical. She stood up, grabbing a piece of toast and taking a bite. "I think I'm going to take a bath," she said, placing the uneaten toast back on the plate. She grabbed her phone and made her way into the bathroom.

"I'll be right here," Dan called out. He was feeling anxious, but forced a smile anyway.

Blair turned around and nodded back at him. "I know."

* * *

Nate scratched his head. It was Sunday morning and he was still recovering from the previous night's theatrics. And the bottle of Scotch he had downed afterwards. It wasn't even light out and his doorbell was ringing. Nate groaned and looked through the peep hole, cocking his head back in frustration. Serena. He closed his eyes for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose. He hesitated, then finally opened the door.

Serena was a sight, and he could only stare at the mess of a young woman before him. She was still dressed in her Chanel gown from the night before, but her hair was now down and tousled. She looked like she'd been wandering the streets.

"Can I come in?" She requested softly. Nate wasn't exactly ready to forgive or forget, but he motioned her in anyway.

"Nate, I...I want to apologize. I really don't know what I'm doing anymore." Nate noticed a change in her from the night before. She looked flat out defeated. "I'm so sorry. For everything. Whatever you want me to do I'll do it. Write an apology so you can publish it in the Spectator. Send a statement into the Times. Just tell me." Nate knew she was sincere, if not desperate. He searched her face, her normally gleaming blue eyes were dull and distant. Serena found herself feeling ashamed and unable to make eye contact with him. And just like that she couldn't hold it in any longer. She thought she was all cried out, but she was evidently wrong.

Almost instinctively, Nate rushed to her, cradling her in his arms and trying his best to soothe her as she convulsed through her tears. He was still upset with her, but he knew a cry for help when he saw one. In spite of it all, he still cared about her deeply, and likely would never stop. "Shh, shh, it's okay." He rubbed her back affectionately.

"Why couldn't he have just left me alone, Nate? If he really wanted Blair this whole time, why did he have to pull me back in? Why'd he have to make me love him if he was just going to hurt me like this?"

Nate shook his head. "I don't know, Serena. But I don't think anyone ever intentionally set out to hurt anyone here. Things like this just happen sometimes." Nate continued to hold her until she finally got control of herself.

"I've decided to give Dan a divorce. Uncontested. It's the right thing to do." She bit her lip and looked up at Nate who was looking back at her in astonishment. "Maybe if I had handled things differently all those years ago. If I hadn't been so indecisive. Maybe if Juliet hadn't drugged me at the Saints and Sinners party, he would never even..." Her voice was starting to break again. "They would never have even...and he would never have...But he did so..." Nate pulled her close against him, knowing that her dwelling and second guessing on the past wasn't healthy or helpful at this point.

"Hey. I'm proud of you," Nate whispered. He noticed that her eyes weren't really focusing in on anything-just kind of drifting. No doubt it was fatigue. She was practically delirious. "The upstairs bedroom is made up. You could probably use some sleep." Serena nodded and Nate led her to the stairwell.

"I'm really so very sorry, Nate." Nate leaned in to hug her again. "Thank you for letting me crash here."

"You're doing the right thing, Serena," he assured her.

He then watched her, waiting until she made her way up the stairs and to the landing before retiring back to his own room. Serena walked down the hall and entered the bedroom, closing the door and making sure to lock it behind her. She then headed into the adjoining bathroom.

She briefly looked in the mirror, pushing the hair back out of her face before starting to rummage around in her purse, searching for something. And a few seconds later she found exactly what she needed to officially put the last twenty-four hours in the history books-a small, glass vial of cocaine.

* * *

Blair stared up at Dan from her side of the bed. He was still dreaming away, his lips moving ever so slightly, one arm draped around her waist. He had held her the entire night. He had rubbed her back and tenderly kissed her on the shoulders and cheeks and eyelids and whispered the most loving, positive things to her. Anything he could do to try and relieve her pain. And Blair's eyes would linger up at his. She caressed his face with her fingertips and dotted kisses along his chest in response.

But those words couldn't make her stop replaying the events of the previous day over and over again. Nothing could. She looked over at the alarm clock. _Five-forty five_.

It was time.

Blair gently removed Dan's arm, being careful not to wake him up. She quietly slid out of bed, peeling off her nightgown and grabbing for the first thing in her drawer to put on, a sweatshirt and sweat pants-a rarity in her wardrobe. She quickly put her hair up in a ponytail and looked over at Dan one last time before quietly opening the bedroom door and closing it carefully behind her.

**_You're a fraud and you know it  
But it's too good to throw it all away  
Anyone would do the same  
You've got 'em going  
And you're careful not to show it  
Sometimes you even fool yourself a bit  
It's like magic  
But it's always been a smoke and mirrors game  
Anyone would do the same_**

Ten minutes later Blair arrived at Gracie's diner. Georgina was already sitting down in a booth and sipping on a cup of coffee. She looked remarkably fresh and put together for it being so early in the morning-and for the late night she undoubtedly had the night before. Quite the contrast from Blair's makeup free grunge look. Georgina gave her a quick once over.

"I have to say I'm glad to see you, Blair. It would be easy to jump to the conclusion that I had something to do with last night's unfortunate incident considering our conversation in the town car." She took another sip of her coffee. Blair's face said it all as she took a seat opposite of Georgina.

"Well. It would have been overkill, even for you," Blair said flatly. "Getting the authorities involved voluntarily isn't typically your style."

"True." Georgina went silent for a moment then took out the confidentiality agreement and a pen and placed it in front of Blair. Blair looked it over very briefly before scribbling her signature three times.

"Perfect," Georgina said as she stuffed the papers back in her bag. "Operation 'Gut a Bass' is underway."

Blair's eyes transfixed on Georgina's. "I want every last damning piece of information you have on Chuck. I want my son back and I want him out of Henry's life. Permanently," Blair demanded vehemently.

Georgina leaned in across the booth. "I think that can be arranged." Georgina was about to pull something out of her bag when Blair interrupted her.

"And there's something else."

Georgina looked at Blair, intrigued. "Go on."

"I propose that we expand this operation to include the takedown of one other person," Blair said.

"And just who would that be?"

"Serena. I want her annihilated. I want to completely obliterate her." Georgina laughed in amusement.

"Sweetie. I think Serena annihilated herself last night. She's in a downward spiral and has solidified her place as a social pariah for the foreseeable future."

Blair was silent, staring icily at her new partner in crime. Georgina immediately got the message.

"Then again, if you truly believe she still has penance to pay...sure. Why not? Annihilation it is!" Georgina was grinning from ear to ear as she took another sip of her coffee.

"And we need to get one thing straight," Blair continued, an even deeper edge to her voice. "If we are to make this partnership work, I do not take orders from you. In fact, I think this will run more smoothly if I take command of the strategic side of the operation and you continue with the investigative side-the lurking in the shadows and creepy stalking part. That's obviously what you excel at."

Georgina leaned back in the booth, a smirk crawling over her face.

"We can discuss it. But for now and as promised..." Georgina pulled out her phone from her purse and offered Blair a pair of ear buds. Blair made a face and grabbed a napkin, first wiping them off before looking at Georgina and hesitantly placing them into her ears. Georgina eyed Blair as she plugged them into her phone. She then scrolled down to one of several recordings she had on her phone and pressed play. Georgina waited, watching Blair's face with eager anticipation.

**_Such highs and_**** lows  
You****_ put on quite a show  
All these highs and lows  
And you're never really sure  
What you do it for  
Do you even want to know?  
You put on quite a show._**

Seconds later Blair's jaw was on the floor, a look of sheer horror etched upon her face. She looked at Georgina.

"Oh. My. God."

* * *

**__****Thanks so much for the awesome feedback on the last chapter. It's so gratifying to get positive comments (or any comments at all for that matter!) on something you truly enjoy doing. Thoughts on Serena's new coke habit, Blair and Georgina's partnership, or Dan's ****_situation_**** with his attorney? Let me know what you think :) I want to hear it!**

**Much thanks to Vamps for brainstorming with me and helping me get this chapter reader ready (also for the addition of the song lyrics-Gotye's "Smoke and Mirrors by the way!) We have some fun things planned ahead so stay tuned! **

**Again sorry for the delay on this one. Hopefully I can start cranking these out a little quicker. **

**Til next time, **

**XOXO**

**Erin**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Dan groggily flipped over to his side. His eyes were still closed as he adjusted his pillow and reached across the bed for Blair. Feeling around, he soon realized that her side was empty. There was only a cold space where the comforter had been pushed aside. Dan's eyes shot open as he sprung upwards, surveying the spot where his hand had been.

He scanned the room, the day's first rays of sunlight had started to trickle through the window. The first thing Dan noticed was that the door to the bathroom was shut. Dan sighed, clutching his head in his hands. He, himself, was slightly hungover from the gala, and apparently he wasn't the only one suffering. Blair seemed to be battling a bout of morning sickness. He truly felt for her. What a woman had to endure to bring a human being into the world was simply astounding. That piled on to everything else she was having to deal with almost made him feel guilty.

"Blair?" Dan called out from the bed as he pushed the sheets away. "Are you okay in there? Can I get you anything?" He waited a few seconds for a response, listening intently. He got nothing.

Clad in a pair of plaid boxers, Dan leaped from the bed and walked to the bathroom door. He knocked softly. "Blair?" He reached for the doorknob, slowly turning it open. He was disturbed to find that the bathroom was completely dark and unoccupied; no sign of anyone having recently been inside. Dan scrambled to the closet door where he had hung up his tux the night before. He haphazardly threw on his pants and dress shirt, not bothering to button it up. He then grabbed his shoes, shoved his phone in his pocket, and made his way downstairs just in time to hear the sound of the elevator door opening and see Blair exiting.

"Blair!" Dan didn't mean to shout her name like he did, but he was relieved to see her. She looked up at him as he rushed down to meet her in the foyer.

Blair scrunched her face up, like a kid who'd been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. _Damn._ Considering the night they'd had, she thought for sure he'd be exhausted and could make it back before he woke up. She should have known better.

"Where were you?" Dan questioned, unable to keep his concern in check.

Blair paused for a moment, knowing whatever she said was about to be thoroughly scrutinized. The past twenty-four hours had left her experiencing a wide spectrum of emotions-the jubilation of being reunited with Dan at the gala, hostility towards Serena for ruining the Waldorf fashion preview, and of course sadness and despair over losing her son. But what a difference a morning made, or to be more specific, an hour, because now there was only one single, overriding feeling racing through her-the feeling of impending victory.

As it turned out, the _Bass_tard had made a mistake of epic proportions, and Blair would soon have the privilege of making him pay for it. She would get her divorce. She would get her child. And she would get revenge. But she had to play it cool, which was going to be easier said than done. The excitement was hard to contain.

"I was...just getting some air," Blair fibbed as she removed her coat and flung it carelessly on the entry way table. Dan did a double take as he caught sight of her attire. It was quite the blast from the past-the same sweat pants and hoodie set he had bought her the night they had run away together following her wedding to Louis. He had never seen her wear sweats before that night, nor had he seen her wear them since.

"I took a walk around the block to clear my head," she added, for good measure. Blair then smiled and bounced over to Dan, giving him an enthusiastic kiss on the cheek. There was a significant amount of adrenaline pulsating through her veins, and she needed some kind of an outlet for it. "Come on..." She reached for his hands. "Let's go back to bed," she whispered.

Dan's eyes narrowed on hers. Blair's spirits were inexplicably high for someone who had just lost custody of her child. As she tried to pull him up the stairs, Dan promptly pulled her back, turning her around to face him.

"Wait...wait...Blair. Why are you...you just went for a walk around the block?" It wasn't that he didn't believe her. He was just trying to understand the origin of this sudden exuberance. The mood she was in just didn't mesh with the events of the previous night.

"Yes." Blair responded quickly, without any hesitation whatsoever.

She kept her eyes on Dan, gaging his reaction. It wasn't the whole truth, but she knew he would never approve of what she was doing. Not to mention, Georgina had warned her not to share any part of their discussions with him. The woman had in her possession exactly what Blair needed to get her divorce _and_ her child back. She couldn't risk losing Georgina's help. And honestly, she just didn't want Dan worrying about her. Blair was certain that this could all be handled expeditiously. She would simply fill Dan in afterwards-just as soon as she had her son back and Chuck was taken away in handcuffs to rot away in a cold, dark, prison cell. But for now, unfortunately, she would have to keep him in the dark. It really was for his own good.

"The cold air was invigorating," Blair continued, still trying to convince him, and maybe herself, too.

"And it helped me put things in perspective. Last night was truly awful, but I reminded myself that sometimes things aren't as bad as they seem. I have a lot to be thankful for. _We_ have a lot to be thankful for," she added pointedly. Blair smiled as she pulled on his hand, once again attempting to lure him up the stairs. Dan still didn't budge. Because something was off. He couldn't quite wrap his head around what he was seeing _or_ hearing. Last night, Blair had barely spoken at all. She had been far too devastated.

But the Blair he was looking at now bore no resemblance to that one. When Dan found out that Chuck had been awarded custody of Henry, he immediately began to try and prepare himself for how he was going to have to deal with her. At _best_ he expected her to hole up in her bedroom for a while. Perhaps he would have to force her to eat...get dressed...go outside every once in a while. But this Blair was fully coherent and strangely disaffected. And to make matters even more confusing, she was now trying to initiate a round of "wake and quake." Dan wasn't completely sure what the proper reaction from him should be. Of course he wanted her. He always wanted her. But the timing seemed...wrong. He was conflicted. Would it be considered taking advantage, or merely a means of comfort? Or was this all simply a case of pregnancy hormones shifting into overdrive? He had more questions than answers at this point.

Blair stood nervously on the first step as she waited for him to say something. Her explanation obviously still wasn't satisfying him, and she could practically see the wheels of uncertainty gyrating in his head, analyzing her behavior. Sexual distraction wasn't working. She needed to think quickly.

"I'm hungry!" She suddenly blurted. "And you know what sounds _really_ good to me right now?" She asked, giving him no time to respond. "Banana pudding!" She nodded excitedly to emphasize her point, then she licked her lips. She didn't feel bad about distracting him with this announcement because it was the truth. She _really_ _was_ starving and she _really had_ been craving bananas all week. Really ripe ones. And blueberries. But especially bananas. There was even evidence to corroborate this because Dorota had the kitchen stocked with both.

But the actual craving at this particular time was banana _pudding_. And the more she thought about it the more she wanted it. Right now, banana pudding sounded like pure banana heaven. It was cold and smooth and it had cream _and_ crunch! God yes, it was all she could think about now.

"Banana pudding?" Dan was amused, if not suffering from extreme whiplash. Her thoughts were just all over the place this morning. It was dizzying. "Really? That's just um...wow. Banana pudding." There was a twinge of excitement in his voice and Blair was enjoying his reaction, watching him experience another pregnancy first-a pregnancy craving.

It went without saying that Dan had been lurking various message boards over the past few weeks, reading up on all of the different types of foods pregnant women craved and the lengths that their poor husbands and partners had to go to in order to satisfy them. He was aware that a craving could come on strong and at a moment's notice.

"Yes. Banana pudding," Blair confirmed, nodding her head fervently, "with the vanilla wafers. And lots of whipped cream. _Real_ whipped cream. Not the spray can stuff or that which comes in a plastic tub." Blair was coquettishly blinking at Dan.

"Vanilla wafers and real whipped cream," Dan exhaled nervously. "Okay, um...well..." He started to button up his shirt. "It would be an honor for me to go to the store and get you banana pudding. And the _real_ whipping cream and of course the vanilla wafers." Blair smiled, pleased with his response.

"Oh, what brand of pudding should I get?" He asked. Blair's face immediately fell.

"What _kind_?" She repeated with disgust, but also half teasing. "Humphrey, I hope you're not serious. I do not eat anything that comes out of a can or a plastic cup." Dan rubbed his temple for a second, silently cursing himself. It was a typical rookie mistake. "Right. Of course," Dan corrected himself. "I will…then I will make it. From scratch."

Blair cocked her head incredulously to the side, her eyes gripping his. "What's that, Humphrey? You know how to make banana pudding from _scratch_?"

Dan exhaled again, becoming slightly more aware of the fact that Blair was messing with him. "You're craving banana pudding. I'm going to make you banana pudding." Blair stared at Dan, a grin slowly materializing on her face. Aside from the obvious reasons, this pregnancy was already so different-in a good way, and despite the morning sickness and the drama that was currently swallowing both of them whole.

For sure Chuck had never acted this way when she had been pregnant with Henry. Yes, he was thrilled when he found out that he was going to be a father-but he wasn't around that much. Blair had gotten pregnant quickly after Bart's death. Late nights at Bass Industries and recruiting new investors into the fold to keep the company alive had kept Chuck tied up. Tied up, she was learning, in more ways than Blair knew at the time. Because of this, the two of them never really got to experience the things that normal expectant parents did. There were no Lamaze classes or late night runs for ice cream. No foot rubs or shopping for bassinets. And since Blair had been bedridden for a good portion of Henry's pregnancy, Chuck had simply hired a personal nurse to look after her and attend to her needs.

And as for Louis, he had been too busy being paranoid to really partake in any of her first pregnancy experience at all-not that some of it wasn't her fault. Or most of it. She had shut him out before the wedding, but she married him anyway. She knew there was never going to be a future with him.

But that all seemed like a lifetime ago.

The fact that she and Dan were here having a child together was remarkable.

"Really?" Blair answered softly. Blair was completely beaming at him now. Dan couldn't help but smile back. She leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "I think I might like to watch you make it," she added.

Dan exhaled and wrapped his arms around her waist, his hands slowly creeping down until he was grabbing her derriere and lifting her right off the step and into the air, eliciting a tiny laugh.

"You really want to watch?" Dan whispered suggestively, giving her neck a little nibble, making her giggle.

"Well I think I need to see if you're doing it correctly. Making custard is an art, Dan. It takes patience and skill. You have to simmer the _cream..._" She sighed just above his ear as he pulled his head back to look at her, wanting to stay fully engaged in his cooking lesson. "And _whisk_ the eggs..." She started to run her fingers slowly through his hair, massaging his head and moving it around in a circular motion. He was beginning to lose all rational thought. "You have to properly _combine_ everything. Slowly and gently. So it doesn't curdle." Dan's breathing was intensifying. "And then you have to stir it. Stir it continuously...until everything gets _thick_." Dan leaned in to work on her neck some more. "You have to chill it until it gets completely _firm_ and then..." Blair smiled devilishly as she suddenly released his hair from her grip. "You know what?" she said. "Maybe I should just get Dorota to make me some in the morning. Because it takes a _long_ time if you're doing it...correctly." Dan embraced her even more tightly now. He'd taken just about all teasing he could take.

"You know, I think I've heard that..." a delirious Dan replied. Blair leaned in and began to deliberately feast on his lips, her legs reflexively pulling themselves up, wrapping them tautly around his waist.

Banana pudding was going to have to wait.

They began to pick up the pace with their make out session, bucking up against one another as she abused his hair with both fists. A progression of tiny moans from her mouth added to Dan's excitement as he tried to figure out how he was going to navigate the staircase.

"Humphrey..."

"BLAIR!"

They nearly fell up the stairs at the sound of Eleanor's ear-piercing screech echoing through the foyer. Dan quickly peeled Blair off of him, having completely forgotten that this was still indeed Eleanor Waldorf's penthouse. Both of them sheepishly wiped at their swollen lips. The elevator doors hadn't even completely opened but Eleanor sliced her way through them anyway. She marched into the foyer and swiftly shed her coat, throwing it on top of Blair's. She was still sheathed in the gown she had worn at the gala, having just come from pulling an all-nighter with Jenny at the atelier. Her swollen eyes cut between a breathless Blair and a disheveled Dan, understandably annoyed at what she had walked in on. Dan looked down at the floor in embarrassment, running his fingers through his tousled hair.

"Why did you not call me!? _Why_ did I have to learn that Charles Bass has been granted full custody of _my_ grandson by way of an email from Randall? And would you like to explain to me what he means by 'Hazelden might be a good option?' What the hell is going on here, Blair?!" Randall...That Benedict Arnold! He was officially uninvited to her supervised visit.

Blair looked at Dan. She frowned. She could see his anxiety returning.

"Well, mother," she sighed. "Here is all you need to know. Chuck is trying to make me look like an imprudent pill popper who leaves Ziploc baggies full of Oxycontin laying around as if they were old copies of New York Magazine. The more I think about it, the more utterly pathetic and amateurish I find it to be. If he wanted to make me look like a bad mother, he should have done so in a manner that couldn't be easily disproved with a simple blood test. Additionally, if I were a true pill popper I can think of at least _twenty _different places in this very foyer to hide a stash. The whole thing is utterly preposterous."

Eleanor stared irritably at her daughter, folding her arms up against her chest. "Blair, I realize that your making light of the situation is your way of coping with it, but do I need to clue you in to the fact that your son is not here?!" Eleanor's hand gestures were emphasizing her every word. "You have _lost_ custody of your child, Blair! To the man who tried to kidnap him! Why are you not completely outraged?"

Dan listened intently as Eleanor continued her rant, her face simultaneously filled with fury and concern. Eleanor was absolutely right. Blair should have been enraged and Dan should have been, too. But he wasn't, and he wondered if it was because for the first time in a long time, he actually had Blair all to himself. Minutes earlier, it had been just the two of them. Alone. In the penthouse. No Henry. No Chuck. No Serena. It was just the two of them and _their_ baby with talk of cravings. It had just felt _so_ right.

But Eleanor's arrival had brought Dan to a moment of clarity. Henry was a part of Blair's life. And restraining order or no, that made him a part of Dan's life, too. He knew Blair needed to be proactive, and he had to be right there, fighting alongside of her to get her son back. He couldn't let his selfish desires overshadow her needs.

He looked at Blair, who was as cool as a cucumber. "I'm not outraged, Mother. Because unlike you, I know this will all be resolved soon."

"Blair," Dan interjected. "Exactly _why_ do you think this will all be resolved soon? Did you...did you get some kind of new information this morning?"

Eleanor looked at her in surprise, her curiosity piqued. "What happened this morning?"

Blair cut her eyes at Dan. "Nothing happened this morning. Like I said," she huffed. "A drug test will prove that I am not 'popping' pills. I'm simply trying to stay positive," she said indignantly. "You'd think those closest to me would try and do the same!"

"Blair," Eleanor sighed, nearly at the end of her rope. "Staying positive is fine. But this divorce has taken an ugly turn that _you_ did not see coming. First you told me you thought Chuck wasn't going to contest it. Then you told me he would be fine with joint custody. You have been wrong about every move that man has made! Throw in the disaster last night and the impromptu wrestling match with Serena and well...things are just not going well around here!" She paused for a moment, covering her eyes in agitation.

"Blair, I think it's time to bring in some reinforcements. We need to hire some child custody experts. This issue is not going to resolve itself just because you have decided to employ the power of positive thinking! You need to stop living in a fantasy world..." She paused to look purposely at Dan, who got the message loud and clear "...and start getting real about the gravity of this situation!"

Blair was visibly annoyed now. There was a moment of impenetrable silence as Dan looked between mother and daughter. He could see Blair clenching her fist out of the corner of his eye. He knew she hated being called out on her mistakes, but it was all true. Eleanor had the clearest point of view out of the three of them.

"Blair," Dan said, firmly but warmly. "I think your mother is right." She looked at him in protest, but before she could say anything, something occurred to her. The best way to handle this would be to just relent-succumb to her mother's wishes and bring in the so-called experts. It was the perfect way to keep Dan and her mother at bay for a while, and to put an end to this impossibly frustrating conversation.

She pursed her lips together for a moment, as if considering the suggestion. And then after a moment...

"Fine," Blair finally spoke, feigning exasperation. "Bring in the 'experts,'" she said, air quotes and all. "I suppose it won't hurt."

Eleanor was slightly caught off guard, but pleased that Blair had come to her senses, as was Dan. "Perfect," she replied in her typical dry manner. "I will...discuss it with Cyrus when I see him later."

Blair raised her eyebrows. "Oh? Cyrus is coming here?"

Eleanor shook her head. "No. After last night's debacle I'm flying out to Paris to check in on the atelier and pick up some designs. Jenny and I have got meetings scheduled here this week so I'll be back by tomorrow evening." Eleanor studied her daughter for a moment. "Knowing that you have come to your senses and are now taking control of the situation makes me feel a lot better about getting on a plane." She looked at her watch. "I need to go pack." Eleanor turned to look at Dan, observing his untucked and partially unbuttoned shirt and his bare feet.

Her gaze narrowed on him. "Are you..._staying_ here?" she asked sharply.

Dan gulped, unsure of how to answer her. Was she talking about short term or long term? What exactly was her definition of "staying?" Why did this woman always manage to make him feel like a cater waiter again?

"I, um-"

"Actually," Blair interrupted. He's off to the store now." She looked at Dan pointedly. "To pick some things up for me. Now, I too must get showered and dressed because I am going to see my son in a few hours. When I see him I am going to tell him again that this is only a temporary arrangement and that sooner, rather than later, he will be back with me. His mother. Where he belongs." She paused for a moment, giving a self-satisfied look to Dan and Eleanor. "Because we are bringing in 'the experts.'" Blair then nodded and without another word, made her way up the stairs.

Eleanor shot Dan a look and then shook her head slightly. She then followed behind Blair up the stairs, lifting her gown so that she wouldn't trip.

Dan sighed once they were out of earshot. He tucked his shirt in and grabbed his shoes from where they had fallen by the staircase, shoving them on. He then made his way to the elevator, setting off to go and get the banana pudding ingredients. He was still thinking about what had just happened. Something wasn't sitting right with him about that conversation. And it wasn't just Eleanor's haughty looks or comments.

Dan was just about to step inside the elevator when he was alerted to a text message. Dan pulled his nearly juiced out phone from his pocket. He nearly dropped it when he saw who it was from.

_Serena_.

The absolute last person he wanted to hear from.

He looked at the message in disbelief. "_Can we meet? I need to talk to you."_

Dan shook his head. Her antics at the Frick had left everyone furious with her. What could she possibly have to say to him that he'd want to hear?

As he went to text her back she texted him again first.

"_PLEASE, DAN. It's important._"

In addition to just being pissed off with her, Dan wasn't sure exactly where this type of situation fell in the realm of proper divorce etiquette. What would Megan think? Not that he was actually taking her advice anyway, having just woken up in Blair's bed.

Dan hesitated for a moment, but he was curious. Something was prodding him to go. At the very least he could take his turn admonishing her for the stunt she had pulled. Against his better judgement, he quickly shot her a text back.

_"Fine. Via Quadronno. Noon. I can only stay an hour." _Dan knew Blair's visitation started at noon and would be over at one.

Serena responded right away. _"Great. I'll see you then." _

With that, Dan shoved his phone back into his pocket, then pushed the button to take him to the ground floor. He began to repeat the banana pudding ingredients.

"_Real_ whipped cream_. _Nothing from a tub. Nothing from a cup. Nothing from a can..._"_

* * *

"Damn. You're up freaking early." Jack Bass was cranky as usual as he sat down at the seldom used Bass kitchen table. Chuck was on autopilot as he reached for a spatula and scraped scrambled eggs onto an awaiting plate.

"I hate to tell you this," Chuck replied with his usual squinty faced expression, "but seven-thirty isn't that early. Especially when you have kids."

Jack shrugged, unconvinced. He had a kid, too. Kind of. And seven-thirty was fucking early.

"And could you please watch the language?" Chuck gestured up the stairway in the direction of Henry's room. It irritated him that he had to constantly remind Jack of this every time he was in the vicinity of his son, though it was a small price to pay on a day like today. Chuck was euphoric. He had full custody of his son.

It had only been a few hours since he'd gotten the good news from his attorney. Even if this victory was classified as "temporary," Chuck was fairly certain that it was going to be the start of many more victories to come. One way or another, Blair was going to see what a big mistake she was making and what it had finally cost her. Of this he was certain. The only question was, how would he respond when she came crawling back to him on her dainty little hands and knees. He was a little surprised he hadn't heard from her already. Not that he would even have had time to discuss the situation with her. The last few hours had been an absolute whirlwind, what with having to prepare Henry's room and making a late night run to the store to stock up the fridge for breakfast. Chuck had no details as to how or why Blair had come to be stripped of her custodial rights, though at this point he hardly cared. All he knew was that giving his attorney a list of demands -i.e., full custody of his son-had paid off. Whatever tactics Patrick van Heusen had utilized in order to make it happen was all on him. Chuck's hands were clean. And it looked like Patrick was worth every outrageous penny.

But Chuck did have one complaint. When the social worker came to drop Henry off, she informed him that a professional monitor would be there the next day to pick his son up for a supervised visit with Blair. Already having to deal with arranging visitation for his estranged wife seemed completely counterintuitive. The woman lost custody for a reason. Should she really be rewarded so soon? Not to mention, he had seen the video of her and Serena throwing down at the Frick-not exactly an appropriate way for a mother to be behaving in public, if you asked him. Additionally, Chuck was peeved that Blair's attorney felt the need to tag along and escort Henry and the social worker to his home in the middle of the night. Perhaps another restraining order could be issued? He would need Patrick to work on that.

"Whatever. Sure. I'll watch the language." Jack replied casually, completely unrepentant, "...I'll watch the language as long as you're aware that the clinking of pots and pans doesn't really lend itself to a peaceful sleeping environment. You don't plan on making that a regular occurrence, do you?" Chuck stopped for a moment, his eyes narrowing conspicuously on his uncle. Jack had just inadvertently brought up a subject that had been bothering him for a while. The subject of_ "when the hell was Jack leaving_?"

Especially now that Henry was living with him again, it was officially time that Jack got back to the Outback.

"So um..." Chuck began carefully, ignoring the previous question. "What are you planning to do about Georgina?"

Jack ran his fingers through his already mussed up hair. He had to be meticulous with his answer. He was getting closer and closer to regaining full control of Bass Industries once again. New York was central command for the company and he had five multibillion dollar investors dealing exclusively with him now. _This_ was where he needed to be. Since coming back to New York, Jack had closed on three secret deals in Hong Kong, Singapore, and Rio-deals which Chuck knew nothing about. And he had two more pending. _He_ was the one out there getting things done while his nephew was fussing over his son and sniveling over Blair, drowning his sorrows in the prostitutes and liquor. Of course, Jack had been the one to supply them. But the fact that Chuck was here now, in full Mr. Mom mode, meant that D-day was fast approaching. Georgina and her little rugrat were already running around the city somewhere. Her desire to be in New York gave Jack a legitimate excuse to relocate without his nephew getting suspicious, and give him just enough time to get the other two deals closed. That would make _five_ groundbreakings in approximately one month's time. More than Bass Industries had in the entirety of the last two years. He was bringing in the money. Though, to be completely honest, it wasn't currently going into the Bass bank accounts. Regardless, with Bass investors firmly planted on his side, Chuck would have no choice but to exit stage left.

"You know," Jack said, trying his best to sound genuine-which was basically impossible. "I've been thinking. In light of recent events, you know, you getting custody of the kid, you're probably gonna want to spend as much time with him as possible. I should stick around. Obviously Georgina's wants to be here. We can put Wheeler in charge of the South Pacific. It'd be good to test him anyway. And if he can't handle things down there, we'll just do what we always do. Can him." Jack winked at his nephew and laughed, as if putting someone on the unemployment line was even remotely funny.

Chuck considered his answer as he set the plate of eggs down on the table. Sure, he'd been distracted lately, but he was finally starting to get a clue.

Jack continued. "But I know what you're thinking. And you're right. You're right. Time to give you and the kid some space." He sighed, as if the thought of leaving Chuck physically pained him. "I'm gonna start looking for places tomorrow. That way you can get up as early as you want and beat those pots and pans 'til your little heart's content." He suddenly stood up from the table and stretched his arms up over his head before reaching for the pot of coffee. He poured himself a cup, then took a long, excessively sloppy sip.

Chuck surveyed his uncle. His whole reason for even coming to New York in the first place was over his anger at losing the Hong Kong deal. Jack had blamed him, had blamed his personal life. But he hadn't mentioned Hong Kong since then. And he quickly changed the subject any time Chuck brought it up. Or Rich. Or any of the investors for that matter, instead insisting that he needed to get new blood into the fold.

"So. Where is the kid, anyway?" Jack asked disinterestedly, purposefully changing the subject.

"His name is Henry," Chuck replied, knowing full well that Jack was deflecting. "And he's still asleep, but I'm about to go wake him. He needs to keep in a routine. I want him to be able to get up for school in the morning."

"What a responsible parent you are," Jack said sarcastically. "Actually surprised your impression of Emeril didn't wake him up already, though," Jack snorted. Amused with himself, he grabbed a fork and began to help himself to the plate of eggs. He inhaled a mouthful, chewing like a cow eating its cud, before looking up at Chuck who was now unmistakably glaring back at him.

"Oh, wow. Sorry," Jack gulped, suddenly throwing the fork down. "Guess that was supposed to be for..." Jack grabbed his coffee. "You know what, I think I'm just gonna go get dressed. Maybe go to the office for a few hours. Grab something on the way. Give you some time with your son." Chuck was silent as he watched Jack make his way out of the kitchen. This morning was supposed to be a happy one, but now all he could think about was how duplicitous Jack had been in the past. Jack was staying in New York. That old feeling had returned.

Chuck savagely grabbed a carton of orange juice from the fridge and set it out on the table before heading up the stairs to Henry's room. He poked his head through the door to see Henry lying in bed, clad in his batman pajamas, still sound asleep. Chuck walked over and had a seat on the bed, tousling up his son's hair. "Hey, buddy. Time to wake up," Chuck whispered. He gently patted Henry on the back. His eyes started to slowly open.

"I'm sleeping," Henry said dismissively, turning away from his father.

"Come on. I made breakfast," Chuck informed him, as if that would somehow be enough to change his mind.

Henry rolled over onto his back. "I'm not hungry right now," he pouted, "and I want to sleep." He closed his eyes again and turned back over. Chuck frowned, getting frustrated as he began to pull the covers away. Henry began to grab the covers back in protest. "Noooo..." he yelped.

"Henry. Let's go! I don't have time for this," Chuck warned. This behavior was indubitably Blair's fault. She had probably been letting him do anything he wanted in order to gain a parental advantage. But Chuck wasn't about to let Henry call the shots. He removed the covers, then picked Henry up, dragging him kicking and screaming from the bed and down the stairs.

A few minutes later they were sitting opposite each other at the kitchen table, Henry crossing his arms in protest.

"Eat your eggs," Chuck demanded as he got up to grab a glass. He poured his son some juice.

"I don't like _eggs_! I want Dorota to make French Toast!"

"Dorota isn't here," Chuck grumbled, trying to keep his temper in check. He had hired a new cleaning woman, but was going to need to look into getting a more permanent housekeeper who could cook and entertain Henry, seeing that Dorota had relocated back to the Waldorf penthouse permanently.

"When can I go back to Nana's?" Henry demanded.

"You really want to go back to Nana's? All of your toys and games are here. Aren't you happy to be back in your own bed?"

"My mom said I could go back to Nana's as soon as she feels better. Call her now ask her if she's better!"

Chuck was taken aback. "Your mother said that you could go back with her when she was _feeling better_?" Chuck was outwardly perturbed that Blair had not only lied to him, but was making false promises, using flimsy excuses as to why their son was no longer allowed to live with her. _She_ was the one who had instigated all of this. The least she could have done was explain to the child why they were no longer living together as a family. It had been her call.

Henry nodded eagerly as he pushed the eggs away but reached for the juice. "I'm tired of her being sick _all_ the time." Chuck was caught off guard again. _Sick all the time_...? What?

"What do you mean, Henry? Sick how?" Henry didn't immediately answer as he instead decided to take a swig of orange juice from his glass. Chuck leaned in impatiently over the table.

"Henry. Tell me. When you say 'sick' what do you mean exactly? Like coughing or what?" Henry unhesitatingly shook his head no. "Then what?" Chuck asked, his jaw tightening.

"She just pukes a _lot_!" Henry said, making a face.

Chuck leaned back in his chair, placing his hands around the back of his head. "She's throwing up?" Henry nodded in confirmation, then took a bite of his eggs. He immediately spit them back out, making a face. "Ewwwww. These are gross."

Chuck was hardly offended. He was too busy thinking about what his son had just revealed to him. Blair had not had an occurrence of bulimia in nearly a decade. And now his son was having to witness it. Chuck heaved a sigh, preparing to question Henry some more. But before he could press his son for more information, Jack popped his head around the door frame.

"Well, hey there um...sport!" Jack could not remember the kid's name if his life depended on it. "Nice PJs. Chuck, I'm out. Looks like you got this."

"I'm out, too!" Henry announced as he jumped up from his chair, roughly shoving it into the table and knocking the glass of juice over. It began to spill over the sides and puddle onto the floor.

"Damn it!" Chuck yelled, jumping up and looking for a towel. "Damn it Henry!" Henry let out a demonic giggle as he pushed past Jack and ran towards the stairs. "You get back here right now!"

Jack made a face. "Oh damn. Or maybe you don't."

* * *

"Wow, Nate! It smells soooo good in here! Have you been secretly taking baking classes or something?" Serena was full of energy as she bobbed into Nate's kitchen, a huge smile on her face. Nate looked up, pleasantly surprised. She was the antithesis of the person he'd been comforting just a few hours earlier, looking completely comfortable and at ease in a bathrobe she'd borrowed from him. Her hair was freshly washed and pulled back into a ponytail. Her eyes were alive and vibrant.

Nate smiled and shook his head. "Not lessons per se. But I do know how to pop open a can. The Pillsbury dough boy and I have a long standing appointment on Sunday mornings. Can I offer you a cinnamon roll?" He asked, slathering the last bit of icing over his tray of freshly baked pastries.

Serena laughed. "Sure. But please. Just one. I'm meeting Dan in an hour and I don't want to feel all heavy and bogged down."

Nate playfully rolled his eyes as she reached across him for a plate. "Please. I've never seen anyone eat like you do and look like _that_," he joked, nodding in the direction of her waistline. Serena smiled at the compliment, and she felt her stomach flutter with joy in response. She wanted things to be okay with Nate. Actually, she wanted things to be _more_ than okay with him. But she wasn't exactly sure how to accomplish it. Embarrassing him at the Frick had never been her intention. And showing up on his doorstep at five-thirty in the morning when she had no one else to go to definitely hadn't been her finest moment. But maybe she was closer than she thought to redeeming herself.

"Oh well. I guess that just means more for me," Nate joked as he stuffed a whole cinnamon roll in his mouth, his eyes opening wide.

Serena playfully feigned a look of shock. She took a deliberate step toward him. "Nate Archibald, be careful. My Heimlich skills are a bit rusty." As he chewed and subsequently swallowed, she reached up with her thumb and wiped a bit of icing from the side of his mouth. Nate immediately turned his head away and reached for a napkin, causing Serena to move her hand. He looked down awkwardly as he wiped his mouth. She watched him for a moment, slightly embarrassed. It was clear he wasn't going to look at her again until she moved out of his personal space-which she finally did. Nate cautiously looked up, trying to put on a smile again after the uncomfortable moment they had just shared. "So you're meeting Dan already?"

Serena nodded but said nothing as she reached for a cinnamon roll. She had just started to come to terms with the fact that her marriage had been nothing more than a fraud, her husband having been in love with her best friend the whole time. Now here she was with Nate, apparently reeking of desperation.

"I know it sounds cliché," Nate continued a little nervously, "but I truly believe it's going to be a whole new start for you. You can travel the world. Do whatever you want. Be happy again." Serena picked at her cinnamon roll.

"Absolutely!" Serena nodded affirmatively, sounding as chipper as she had when she first entered the kitchen. She tore off a piece of cinnamon roll and popped it into her mouth, giving him a big smile.

"You're going to be fine Serena. If there's one thing I know about you it's that you're resilient. Serena van der Woodsen can do anything she sets her mind to." Serena wasn't happy with the generic pep talk Nate was insisting on giving her. She and Nate had been friends for a long time. And in the past few weeks they had been more. What she wanted now, what she _needed_ now, was physical contact. She wanted things to go back to the way they had been just one day earlier. She wanted to please him and satiate him and make him scream out her name, just like she had in that office at the Frick, before everything had gone completely to hell. She also wanted to be able to laugh with him, and she wanted him to touch her and look at her 'that way.' If it wasn't going to be Dan, why couldn't it be Nate? They had always been so compatible. Was she not the girl he completely lusted after through most of high school

"So do you uh...want to maybe do something later?" Serena asked hesitantly. "Maybe we can catch a movie or go to dinner or something and I can fill you in on how it goes with Dan? Or I can cook something? We can talk about my blog at the Spectator?" Nate was quiet for a moment before giving her an apologetic look.

He sighed. "You know I would love to, Serena. But my mother's going to have a conniption if I don't go by the house tonight." Serena's face fell slightly. "But maybe later on in the week?" Serena nodded, still trying to keep her enthusiasm level up in the face of rejection. And make no mistake, it was definitely rejection. Nate was simply doing it nicely by being noncommittal. After all of these years of being the one doing the rejecting-Aaron, Colin, Ben, Steven...and Nate too, she now seemed to be getting an endless dose of it. Maybe this was punishment. Maybe this was what she deserved.

"Absolutely!" Serena said as she quickly set the rest of her cinnamon roll down on the counter and wiped her fingers on the napkin. "Well, I should probably head back to the city now. Give myself some time to run by the apartment and change?" Nate nodded in understanding.

"Well, good luck. I know you're not going to need it," he said, giving her a friendly fake punch in the arm. "I really am proud of you, Serena." Serena stared at him. There he went again with the distant pep talk. She needed to get out of there.

"Thanks, Nate. For letting me stay here...and for everything. I truly am sorry. About all of it." Nate gave her a quick smile before grabbing another cinnamon roll. She then headed out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

* * *

"Mr. Bass?" Chuck surveyed the woman standing at his front door. She was plump and bespectacled, gripping a folder up against her chest. "Hello. I'm Mrs. Pomeroy," she said happily, holding up an identification badge. "I'm here to accompany Henry for his visit with his mother today." Chuck didn't budge from his spot behind the door, squinting at her.

"You know this really isn't a good time for me." Chuck was speaking so low that he was practically inaudible. The woman leaned in closely so she could hear him better. "Maybe you could come back next week?" He suggested a little more loudly as he began to shut the door in her face. Mrs. Pomeroy's hand pushed it back, however, catching Chuck by surprise. She pulled out a document from the folder and flashed it in front of his face.

"Mr. Bass, this is a court ordered visitation. There is no negotiating here. If you don't cooperate with it you can be found in contempt. I don't believe you want that, do you?" Chuck's lip snarled, unamused by the condescension in her voice.

"He's asleep," Chuck explained bluntly. At that moment the vibration of Henry jumping off his bed shook the ceiling. It almost felt like an earthquake. He was screaming like a banshee and the sound echoed down the stairs. The woman gave Chuck a warning look.

God, she hated working with Upper East Side parents. They never thought the rules applied to them.

"Mr. Bass, it is my job to document and report any issues I have with a parent during every part of the visitation process. I must say you aren't off to a very good start. Now, if you could please just go and get the child." Chuck put his hand up in protest.

"No offense Mrs..._Pomeroy_? But I would like to have a little more information as to exactly _why_ my wife lost custody before just giving her the opportunity to be around my son again. So how about you tell me what she did. And then _I_ will determine what's best for my son." The woman cleared her throat, growing increasingly impatient.

"Mr. Bass. This was a very last minute addition to my schedule and I'm not currently privy to that information. My job is to simply mediate and oversee the visitations. I'm sure in time you will receive whatever information you need."

Chuck scoffed, his eyes piercing into hers. "I find it very hard to believe you're not 'privy.' But since you claim to not to know_ anything_, I'll let you in on a little something that _I _know. My wife is sick. She makes a conscious decision after every meal to stick two fingers down her throat. And guess what? My son had been watching her do it. Tell me, _Mrs. Pomeroy_. Do you think a child should have to witness that?" He waited for a moment to let that sink in. Mrs. Pomeroy frowned, but said nothing. "Like I said, I think it's best if we just skip the visit for today."

Mrs. Pomeroy finally heaved a sigh. "Unfortunately that isn't for you to decide, Mr. Bass. Now if you will just get the child ready. Ms. Waldorf is waiting in the car. It's important that we stay on schedule."

"Ms. Waldorf? You mean Mrs. Bass? Blair? She's outside? Right now?"

"She's waiting in the car. That is correct. And she specifically asked me to refer to her as _Ms. Waldorf_." Chuck could feel his blood start to boil.

"She's here to visit her son and she couldn't even come to the door to get him?" Chuck knew perfectly well that wasn't how it was done.

"That's not how it's done Mr. Bass."

Chuck swallowed angrily, then, to Mrs. Pomeroy's surprise, began to slowly move out of the way, gesturing for the woman to come inside. "It'll be a while," he said snidely. "Please. _Do_ make yourself at home." Mrs. Pomeroy nodded, ignoring the attitude as she walked over and had a seat on the couch, relieved that they were finally making progress. She checked her watch as Chuck took his time walking up the stairs, a myriad of thoughts running through his head.

He made his way into Henry's bedroom, immediately finding himself in the crossfire of a projectile dinosaur which hit him smack dab in the temple. Chuck was instantly annoyed, but took a moment to compose himself. "Your mother is downstairs to see you," he finally said, calmly. "Time to get dressed."

"Yes! _Finally_!" Henry declared as he once again kamikaze'd himself off the bed. It wasn't the reaction Chuck wanted to hear, but he would have to deal with it for now. Fifteen minutes later, Chuck brought Henry downstairs dressed in khakis, a dress shirt, sweater vest, and a pair of Burberry sneakers. Chuck grabbed Henry's coat from off of the rack and helped him zip up inside of it. Henry suddenly froze in his tracks, hiding behind his father when he caught sight of the strange woman sitting on the couch.

"Henry, this is Mrs. Pomeroy. She's going to take you to see your mother," Chuck announced unenthusiastically. Henry looked at Chuck in confusion as Mrs. Pomeroy stood up from the couch, smiling warmly.

"You aren't coming?" Henry asked, his bottom lip poking out. Chuck looked down at his son, relieved to finally be getting some sign of affection from him. He looked at Mrs. Pomeroy.

"You know, maybe I should come along." Henry nodded enthusiastically. "Just let me get my coat."

"Mr. Bass. That's not...to spring this on Ms. Waldorf...that's not how it's done."

Chuck placed his hands protectively on Henry's shoulders. "We forgot your gloves. Run upstairs and get them?" Henry nodded. Chuck waited for a moment while Henry ran up the stairs, then turned to Mrs. Pomeroy.

"If my son wants me to come with him, then I'm going to come," Chuck said forcefully.

"Mr. Bass. I understand that emotions can run high in these situations, but this visit is about your son and his mother."

"Blair is not fit to be around my son," he argued.

"It's a supervised visit, Mr. Bass. It's my job to make sure that all parties are safe and comfortable. I assure you, there's no need to worry about a thing." Henry made his way down the stairs, mittens on, and Chuck leaned over to make sure he was zipped up tightly. He then grabbed one of his son's knit cap from the rack and placed it on his head, pulling it down over his ears. He looked at Mrs. Pomeroy for a moment, then back at his son. "Henry. It turns out that I've got to go to the office for a bit so I won't be able to come with you. But I'll see you when you get back. Okay?" He leaned down to give him a kiss on the head. "You want pizza for lunch?" Henry nodded eagerly as Chuck turned once again to face Mrs. Pomeroy.

"Tell her she can be expecting a phone call from me."

"I'm not a secretary Mr. Bass," Mrs. Pomeroy responded bluntly. She walked over to Henry and smiled, extending her hand to him. "Are you ready young man? Your mother says you enjoy the duck pond!" Chuck watched as Mrs. Pomeroy began to usher Henry out the door.

"One hour," Chuck called out, as if he was the one making the rules. The woman nodded, as she closed the door behind them. Chuck waited for a moment before casually walking over to the window and looking out to the street. Sure enough there was a town car parked outside and Blair was waiting impatiently next to it. She was fidgeting, playing with her scarf and repeatedly checking her phone. Chuck surveyed her, but it was hard to glean anything from her appearance because she was so far away. Plus she was completely bundled up in a coat.

Seconds later Chuck watched as Henry bounded into Blair's arms. He grabbed his phone and dialed. "Arthur. Give it two minutes, and then pull the car around." He watched intently as the town car pulled out into the traffic before grabbing his coat.

It was freezing outside, but the weather was perfect for a trip to the park.

* * *

Dan sat at Via Quadronno, sipping on his coffee and tapping his fingers impatiently on the table. Serena was officially fifteen minutes late. Another five and he was walking.

After delivering banana pudding ingredients back to the penthouse for later use-and being side-eyed by Eleanor the whole time-Dan trekked it back to Brooklyn to shower, change clothes, and check in with the family. He also wanted to give Blair some space to prepare for her visit with Henry.

A drained Jenny had been scarfing down cheerios when he arrived at the loft, but she still managed to vaguely fill Dan in on what happened after he left the gala. She confirmed that she hadn't lost her job-which Dan already knew after hearing it from Eleanor. And she was already aware of the situation with Henry, having been with Eleanor at the time she got the email from Randall. Dan knew she was exhausted because she had not pried or posed the first question about Blair or why he was just now getting home. As he went to leave again, Jenny was passed out on the couch, and strangely, Rufus was still asleep. It was highly unusual for his father to sleep past eleven, but apparently his recent time on the road and the theatrics at the gala had really done a number on him. As it had on all of them.

Dan sighed in agitation as he scoped the restaurant. He was starting to think that agreeing to meet with Serena like this had been a terrible idea. Maybe she was just screwing with him and was going to stand him up. Nothing would surprise him after what she had done the previous night. Had he just walked outside he would have seen that Serena was just outside the door, having been standing only a few yards away from the entrance for a good five minutes, taking her time, checking her reflection in her compact for any imperfections. Her pupils were still slightly dilated.

She knew she was late. And she was well aware that once she walked through that door, it was all going to be over. For good this time. Why was she doing this?

She stepped inside and anxiously scanned the crowd for her now soon to be ex-husband. She hadn't been with Dan in nearly two months, but as of now they were still married and she was somehow still able to take comfort in that fact because marriage automatically meant that you weren't alone. Even if you were. Serena took a labored breath. Dan looked up just as she spotted him. She was not surprised to see that he had already made it halfway through a cup of coffee. She smiled tentatively at him as she removed her coat, laying it on the back of her chair before having a seat.

"Hi," she said softly.

"Hi," Dan returned flatly, avoiding eye contact. There was an inordinately long pause. Serena knew that look on his face-the look of disappointment coupled with disgust.

"Um," Dan began, hoping to finally get the conversation moving along so he could just get out of there. "Do you want something to drink or..." Serena shook her head no.

Dan looked at her as they sat in silence. If this was going to be another plea from her to give their marriage another shot, he wasn't sure what he was going to do.

She cleared her throat, and then swallowed nervously. "Is um...how's Jenny?"

Dan rolled his eyes at her attempt at small talk. "You ruined her preview, Serena. You embarrassed her in front of the people who matter most in her industry. Would _you_ be okay?" Serena shut her eyes, chastising herself for her choice of conversation starter. Come on. _Just get to the point, Serena..._

"I um...I'm going to make it up to her," she said shakily. "I promise Dan."

"And exactly how are you going to do that?" Dan shook his head. "What you did, Serena, it was-"

"I never meant to hurt Jenny. I was..I was angry with Blair."

"Like admitting that's supposed to make it any better, Serena!?" Dan crossed his arms as he leaned back in his chair.

"I was wrong, Dan. And I take responsibility. For all of it." Dan looked at her dubiously. It was the last thing he expected to hear coming out of her mouth. She looked down for a moment, as if struggling with something. She knew she probably should have just left it alone, but she had to say it.

"You're still with her..." Dan said nothing as he took another sip of coffee. "Last night you tried to make it seem like..." She paused to take a breath. "Was that for the sake of your attorney or-"

"Does it really even matter at this point, Serena? You're still going to make my life hell regardless." Serena watched him for a moment as he set his coffee cup to the side. She closed her eyes.

"Not anymore," she finally said calmly. Dan began to sit up, caught off guard.

"What are you trying to say Serena?"

"I'm not going to pretend that it doesn't hurt me to see you two together. Or that part of me won't always love you. But I know that I've made some huge mistakes. We both have." She didn't want to completely absolve him from any wrong doing. "But I can't do this anymore." she whispered. Dan took a deep breath of anticipation. It sounded like she was...

"I'm going to have Patrick re-file the divorce papers first thing in the morning. I'm not going to contest anything. Or ask anything of you. If you want to be with Blair..." Dan was floored.

"Serena, are you...are you serious?" This was without a doubt the only thing that could have ever redeemed her after last night's performance.

Serena nodded. "Yes. I'm serious," she said, already regretting it.

Dan ran his fingers through his hair as a flood of relief washed over him. He needed some good news. _One divorce down. One to go_. He sighed with relief, a reaction Serena could have done without.

"I'll um...see if Patrick can expedite things. I just want to get on with my life," she said simply. And with that, Serena stood up from the table and grabbed her coat. She had done exactly what she came to do. And now she felt like shit.

Dan was still in shock, unsure of what to say. After everything-the threats and the investigators, all of the verbal taunts-it was just going to end like this? He wasn't complaining. He had wanted an amicable divorce from the beginning, but this was completely out of left field. He watched her as she began to make her way to the door. The conversation had ended so abruptly. For some reason he just couldn't let it end like that.

"Wait. Serena!" Dan called out without even thinking. Serena turned back around in surprise. "Let me buy you a coffee," he said, gesturing to the counter. Serena turned her head to the side, unsure of what to make of the gesture.

She sure as hell wasn't going to say no to his offer.

* * *

"What did you just call him, Henry?" Blair asked, amused.

"Henry!" He answered.

Blair looked around and pointed at another duck. "So then what's his name?"

"Henry!" Henry declared, throwing a piece of bread in the duck's direction. Mrs. Pomeroy smiled as she looked up from a nearby bench. "Why are they all named Henry?" Blair asked, laughing.

"Because I'm Henry Bass! Their fearless leader!" He shouted. Blair cringed. "And that makes no sense," she whispered to herself.

"He gets that from his father, doesn't he?" a voice called out from the bench. Blair whipped her head around to glare at the woman who was suddenly giving her two cents. She didn't need her comments and she certainly didn't want to talk about Chuck right now, or any narcissistic qualities her son might possibly share with him. She only had a brief amount of time with him. She turned back around and watched as Henry grabbed his loaf of bread and began to run along the pond, darting little pieces at each duck, calling each one out by name. "Here Henry number one. Take it. This is for Henry number two..."

Blair turned back once more, noticing that the woman was now looking at her solemnly. "What?" Blair asked almost rudely. It was embarrassing enough to have someone watching her every move with her child, but the way she was looking at her was downright humiliating.

Mrs. Pomeroy started to say something, but stopped herself. This irritated Blair even more.

"What!?" She demanded again, quickly losing patience.

Mrs. Pomeroy shook her head. "It's none of my business, dear." Blair made a face, and then turned back around to watch Henry for a moment. But the woman's comments, or rather lack thereof, were eating at her. She turned to face her once again.

"What is it? Did Chuck say something?" Blair didn't know why she was letting this woman bother her so much. She sounded so insecure. She needed to remember that this was all just _temporary_. Chuck was about to get what he deserved and Mrs. Pomeroy would simply fade into oblivion. Mrs. Pomeroy glanced at Henry for a moment, then quickly motioned Blair over, as if she was about to let her in on a secret. Blair rolled her eyes dramatically before slowly walking over to the woman and having a seat on the bench next to her, but not too close.

She paused for a second, giving Blair a knowing look. "My daughter was bulimic," she whispered. Blair's mouth opened slightly.

"Hmm. Okay...well I am sorry to hear that," Blair responded shortly. As she started to stand up and head back over to the pond, the woman gently grabbed her arm.

"My Christine got well. And so can you." Blair instantly removed her arm from the woman's grip.

"I'm sorry?"

"She lives in Jersey now. Works in a doctor's office. Has three beautiful daughters."

Blair scoffed in disbelief as she started to put two and two together. "So that's it? He…he told you that I was bulimic?" What an effing shit he was.

"Well, he lied!" Blair said indignantly. "I'm not bulimic. I was in high school but that was years ago. He's obviously just trying to make me look like an unfit mother!" Blair knew how overly defensive she sounded. Her blood pressure was rapidly rising and she wanted nothing more than to call Georgina and implore her to get this show on the road. Chuck's destruction couldn't happen soon enough.

The woman was now looking at her with pity. She'd obviously seen this kind of denial before. It was pointless even trying to convince her. As Blair started to walk off again, she caught a familiar figure out of the corner of her eye. He was standing in front of his limo, his arms crossed.

Blair took a deep, cleansing breath, then calmly turned to Mrs. Pomeroy, casting her an insincere smile. "I will be right back." Mrs. Pomeroy watched in confusion as Blair briskly made her way up the path to where Chuck was looking on with an eagle eye. He was completely stone-faced as she approached him.

"Why are you here!?" Blair demanded angrily.

"Do you really have to ask that?" He responded smugly. "I want to make sure my son's needs are being taken care of, and that you aren't endangering him in any way. Obviously." Chuck began to slowly take in her visage, then took in the rest of her appearance from head to toe. "See, I care about his welfare," he said as he continued to scope her, "unlike you who is apparently too busy getting it on with Daniel Humphrey to care for him properly. And that's according to a judge, by the way." Blair immediately wanted to punch him in the chest and slap his smarmy little face. But with the moderator sitting yards away, that probably wasn't the best idea. She momentarily took a look back at Henry. Thankfully, Mrs. Pomeroy was talking to him and he didn't even seem to realize that Chuck was in the vicinity. She looked down at the ground for a moment, focusing on keeping her emotions in check. It suddenly occurred to her who had the upper hand here. A wicked smile began to unveil itself. She looked up, locking eyes with him.

"You've done some horrific things to me, Chuck," she began in a low, eerie tone, "but taking my son away from me...completely buries all of it." Chuck scoffed, slowly shaking his head in defiance. "But soon," she continued, "you are going to pay. For _all_ of it. The day is drawing near, Chuck. And when the day actually comes, and our son asks me where you went and what happened to his father...I'm simply going to shrug my shoulders."

Chuck was a bit unnerved now. Blair had said some questionable things to him before, but she had never threatened him like this. He had no clue what she was talking about. _Where_ exactly was he going? _What_ was going to happen to him? She sounded bat shit crazy. It almost sounded like she was going to put a hit on him.

"Just what the hell are you trying to say, Blair?!" He heatedly asked.

Blair smiled, pleased with his reaction. "I guess you'll see..." She was cold, and had the eyes of a woman who was completely possessed and she turned to calmly walk off. Chuck was completely enraged now.

"Damn it. Blair! Come back here!" He shouted. "What the hell are you talking about?!" She never turned around again until she made her way back to the pond. She walked over to her son and picked him up. She then placed a kiss on his forehead, in clear view of Chuck. She then smiled. Chuck immediately took off towards them, walking furiously down the path before he was suddenly cut off in his tracks by Mrs. Pomeroy.

"Mr. Bass! I told you. This is Ms. Waldorf's visitation time. Unless you want me to call the judge and inform him of your behavior, you'll leave this instant!" Chuck scowled at the woman before glancing back at Blair and Henry. Blair was enjoying herself immensely now.

"I'll have you know that woman is crazy!" Chuck said, pointing at Blair. "If anything happens to my child I'm coming after you." Mrs. Pomeroy shook her head. These damn Upper East Side parents were so melodramatic! Chuck defiantly made his way back up to the limo, slamming the door behind him.

"Goodbye, Chuck," Blair whispered before turning her attention back to Henry and the ducks.

* * *

Chuck was still hot as his limo made its way along East 73rd street. Perhaps trying to flee the country with Henry had not been such a bad idea after all. Blair had evidently lost all of her marbles. He only wished he'd been recording the conversation.

He pulled his phone out and began to dial Patrick's number, eager to inform him of the recent events when the limo suddenly came to a halt at a red light. Right in front of Via Quadronno. Through the window, he could see two familiar faces. Upon further inspection, it became clear as crystal who it was. It was Dan and Serena. Sitting together. Serena was tossing back her long blonde mane and smiling? And laughing?

"PULL OVER!" Chuck ordered, ending the call and shoving the phone in his pocket. He didn't wait for Arthur to come around and open the door for him, or even for the car to come to a complete stop. In two seconds flat Chuck had made his way into the restaurant. He shoved his way through the busy lunch crowd, making his way over to Serena and Dan's table.

"What the hell is this!? Chuck demanded, his eyes cutting back and forth between the two. Dan looked up in surprise. Serena bit her lip, slightly excited for Chuck to have "caught" them together.

"Why exactly are you two _dining_ together?" Serena looked expectantly at Dan. They had just been discussing some of their more memorable past moments, or rather _she _had-their first date at Jean-Georges, Cotillion, their night on the beach in the Hamptons and the subsequent _ride_ back on the Jitney. Dan was being polite and letting her indulge in the memories, just grateful that she was giving him a divorce. He felt he owed her that much. He felt that it was a way for them to part amicably.

"We were just, um, talking. Discussing something," Serena finally explained, now hoping that he would leave them in peace so they could be alone again. Chuck cocked his head to the side suspiciously.

"And what kind of business would you need to discuss with _him_?"

"The 'none of your business' kind of business, Chuck," Dan piped in. "So why don't you just go on back to your world of paying off judges and social workers and taking innocent children away from their mothers. Because this doesn't concern you," he said, motioning between him and Serena.

Chuck sneered. "I don't know where you get your information from, _Humphrey_, but if it's from the crazy bitch who's in the park right now with my son, I'd take it with a grain of salt. I haven't paid off anyone. Blair lost custody because she's obviously an unfit mother." Chuck was getting louder, and people were starting to inconspicuously turn around in their seats, whispering to one another.

"Wait. Blair lost custody of Henry?" Serena asked with mock concern. Apparently she had missed some things. '_What I will do...is do everything in my power to make sure Chuck gets full custody of your son_.' Serena had just been mouthing off to Blair at the time, but she couldn't say she wasn't secretly relishing this news.

Dan turned to her to explain. "Yeah. A social worker made an 'impromptu' visit to Blair's house last night and just 'happened' to find a baggie full of pills. Oxycontin." He turned back to Chuck. "It has your name written all over it. Don't even try to deny it. Between this and the restraining order, it shows what a pathetic asshole you really are."

"Restraining order...?" a confused Serena interjected. She really was out of the loop.

Chuck leaned in, placing his hand no the table and ignoring Serena's question. "Really, Humphrey? _I'm_ the bad guy for trying to protect my son? Like I already said, I didn't _pay_ off anyone. Because I didn't have to. The woman is obviously mentally unbalanced and she's been proving it for the last two months. Getting drunk and making a scene at the Plaza. Running away with _you_ on New Year's. Making herself _throw up_ in front of _my son_," Chuck said, his teeth gritting together at the last part.

Dan was slightly rattled now. Chuck seemed to know that she'd been getting sick, but he didn't seem any more the wiser. Henry had obviously shared that information with him. Or more likely, Chuck had interrogated his son for every last incriminating detail about Blair that he could get his hands on.

Dan took a quick glance at Serena to see if that last part caught her attention as well. Luckily, and probably considering Blair's history, she seemed unfazed by it. "Oh yeah," Chuck added. "To top it all off, five minutes ago the woman threatened to have me killed," he said. Serena looked at Dan. How could he still want to be with her after hearing all of that?

Dan initially caught himself wanting to laugh at Chuck's last statement, amused by the image of Blair putting Chuck in his place. But those types of threats were serious, and Chuck would undoubtedly use it against her somewhere down the line. Knowing Chuck, he had probably recorded the entire conversation.

Dan began to nervously run his fingers through his hair and that's when it suddenly struck him. What if she really _was_ trying to get Chuck whacked? Blair's impossibly happy demeanor earlier...He suddenly had an image of her meeting with a hit man at some seedy hotel in the early morning hours. There was no way she was capable of something like that. Was she? But then again, she _was_ hormonal. But…no. No. Dan was feeling paranoid now, his creative mind filling him with an endless stream of ideas. He needed answers.

Serena observed Dan, his face filled with obvious concern. Concern for Blair. She solemnly reached for her coffee.

"So you said pills, huh?" Chuck added. "Well, considering everything, that just doesn't surprise me at all. You're obviously an excellent influence on her, Humphrey!" With that, Dan stood up from the table, unable to listen to anymore of Chuck Bass's garbage. He needed to be able to think clearly. Something else wasn't making sense to him. If Chuck was responsible for planting the pills, or having others do it for him, he was surely doing a convincing job repudiating it.

Dan grabbed his coat and walked up to him, standing inches away from Chuck's face. "Chuck. I'm not sure _why_ you thought it would be a good idea to invite yourself to Blair's visit in the first place. That was _her_ time to be with her son. If she said anything to you, which I highly doubt, I'm sure it was out of pure annoyance."

Dan then turned to Serena. "I'll be on the lookout for those papers," he said curtly. Serena managed a nod, a wave of sadness rushing through her.

Chuck glared as Dan walked to the exit. "By the way! That restraining order is still in full effect Humphrey. Just in case you had any notions of going to the park!"he shouted after him. Dan fought the urge to give him the bird as Serena looked over at Chuck, miffed. She then watched somberly as Dan made his way onto the street, walking right in front of the window past them. Chuck looked at Serena and rolled his eyes.

"Please. Tell me you're not still crying yourself to sleep at night over that Fitzgerald wannabe." Chuck calmly walked around to take the seat that Dan was occupying.

"No. I'm not," she said defensively. "Unlike you who, as we speak, is still plotting ways to win Blair back."

"It's not the same. I had a family. We have a child together. You and Dan had...I don't know...Vespas."

Another comment she could have done without. She turned to look at him. "Well, planting pills on her isn't exactly the method I would have used."

Chuck looked at her in surprise. "I didn't plant any drugs on her. How could I? You were sitting here. I didn't even find out about it until Humphrey just told me."

"Right..." Serena responded dubiously.

"It's true. In fact I was thinking it was probably you. I saw the tape, Serena, of you and Blair fighting. I heard what you said. I appreciate your loyalty."

Serena leaned her head on her hand. "Sorry to tell you this, Chuck. But that comment wasn't really about _you_." Chuck smirked in understanding, and then leaned in over the table. He shook his head.

"So you're really just going to let him walk? Free and clear?" Chuck was putting two and two together about what he had actually walked in on between Dan and Serena. "I kind of thought we were in this together," he added pointedly. She didn't respond.

"Whatever. Do what you want." He paused for a moment, watching as Serena stared out the window.

"Does this have something to do with you and Nate? Are you two...?" Serena flashed her eyes at him. Chuck had the incomparable ability to bring up sore subjects.

"No," she said, looking back down. "We aren't. We're not." Chuck eyed her curiously. She could feel him looking her over, examining her. She could feel him staring at her face now, and more specifically, her eyes. "Serena, are you..." He was suddenly distracted by the sound of his phone ringing. After checking to see who it was, he jumped out of his chair. "Patrick!"And just like that, he too had abandoned her. She watched him for a moment as he chatted away pacing up and down the sidewalk. When he turned away from the door, she made her escape.

**_Out to feed that habit when you've sowed that seed  
Nothing made you feel out of the ordinary  
But the air turns somber and the night took heed  
Took you on a waltz of hypocrisy_**

On the sidewalk, she pulled out her own phone to make a quick call. As usual, there was no answer-just a simple, generic voice mail message. Serena waited for the beep. "It's Serena. I just wanted to thank you for your help last night. And I was wondering if we could meet up again? Call me."

The dark-haired man looked at the name of his missed caller. After last night, he knew she'd be calling him again. He just had no idea it would be so soon.

**_It's not enough to say, it's not what's in your heart  
You've tainted every moment 'til death do we part_**  
**_I know you didn't mean it when you counted to ten  
You're slipping through the fingers of your good intent_**

* * *

Georgina had a seat on the couch and crossed her legs, champagne glass in hand. "She's in, Alejandro. Just like I told you she would be. Looks like Chuck actually gave us a little extra help, what with taking that poor, little mini-Chuck away from her. I don't know what I'd do if that psychedelic Russian mobster ever came after Milo."

"And what exactly did you tell her?" Asked the deep, brooding voice laced with a sultry Colombian accent.

"Only what she needed to know. I played her the tape you gave me." Georgina paused to take a sip of her champagne. "Needless to say, Blair was completely floored, though I'm not sure why exactly. As many daddy issues as Chuck has, was there doubt in anyone's mind that he'd turn out just like him, resorting to illegal activities to fund his precious company?"

She set her champagne flute down and stood up.

"It's a win/win strategy. Blair can blackmail Chuck who will in turn blackmail Jack into giving up the location of those hidden bank accounts. My prenup will become null and void. I'll get my divorce, my money, and I barely have to lift a perfectly manicured finger. Could it be any simpler, really?" She laughed.

The man slowly reached into the top drawer of his desk and pulled out an envelope. Georgina's eyes widened with excitement.

"When are you seeing her again?" Alejandro asked.

"Tomorrow night."

He nodded. "Good. I want this done as quickly as possible," he said. "Unfortunately for Bass Industries, it's time to pay the piper. In full."

**_It's not enough to hope for the best  
It's not enough to lie there on a brace  
The liger's on the prowl now you've pulled its strings  
One false move and soon you're playing dice for a…_**

* * *

**Author's Note:** I know it's been while. I hope I haven't lost you all. I seem to have a lot of distraction in my life these days:)

I think I may try to do a shorter, interlude type chapter next time, just to give my mind a break. In other words, some Dan and Blair smut. Would that be okay?

Let me know your thoughts on this one. As usual, thanks to Jai for the brainstorming, proofreading, and support.

XOXO to all of you!

Erin


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